Ban The Poster Above You

[Magdalena]

Banned for not speaking American.

A customer reported me at work many years ago for saying, "Que paso?" to a co-worker. 

[Ecurb Noselrub]

Banned for not knowing the answer to "Que paso?"  The answer is "El Paso."

Out in the west Texas town of El Paso
I fell in love with a Mexican girl
Night time would find me in Rosa's Cantina
The music would play and Felina would whirl

[No one]

A Texas sized ban, for the Spanish you don't understand.

[Arturo]

An Alaska-sized ban because of the polarizing weather and Alaska is the biggest state. Double-Ban.

[No one]

Just to let Juneau, double bans have been banned for years for over exceeding ban limits. You receive a flagrant foul ban. The league will decide on a monetary punishment.

[Ecurb Noselrub]

With reference to your previous ban of me for not understanding Spanish, banned for excessive literalism and failure to appreciate poetic license.

[No one]

That license has been suspended ban.

[Magdalena]

Both of you!

[Ecurb Noselrub]

Banned because "a lot of people are talking about some strange things going on with you - I sent investigators to look into it and they are completely shocked at what they are finding - they absolutely cannot believe it - I really question whether you have the stamina to continue" (the foregoing is hereby known as "the Trump ban"). 

[Magdalena]

Banned.
You, your polyester-wearing-investigators, and El Trumpas are not shocked, you're all just jealous! Oh, and the call that you made to the Adult Protective Services accomplished nothing either. 

[No one]

Fax mentis incendium gloria cultum, et cetera, et cetera... Memo bis punitor delicatum, ban!

[Tom62]

Omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina ban

[Magdalena]

Banned.
Don't be talking trash about The Latina.   

[Ecurb Noselrub]

Banned for trying to make yourself inaccessible to the Trumpista Inquisadores.  They will discover the truth, so fast it will make you head spin, and Mexico will pay for it, and a stoned Doctor will find that their health is astonishingly excellent, and they will not release their tax returns.

[Arturo]

There was never a choice ban