Counter-missionary activity

[Guardian85]

Had an encounter today that I really want to share with someone.
Got to render a mormon missionary completely speechless. :confused:
I left him standing there with his jaw on the pavement.

[Tank]

Had an encounter today that I really want to share with someone.
Got to render a mormon missionary completely speechless. :confused:
I left him standing there with his jaw on the pavement.

Sweet! It's moments like that that make life worth living  

[The Magic Pudding]

Yes very nice, but if I am to rehearse such a quip, is it really accurate to claim evolution as the origin of all life?
Origin of species seems a safer claim.

[Thumpalumpacus]

Well, that is different.

[JoeBobSmith]

Sweet!

[fester30]

I'll tell you how to get rid of Jehovah's Witnesses.  When I was in high school, they used to come to my parents' house all the time.  During the summer, when I was off school working night shift, I would be sleeping during the day.  My parents worked days, so I was the only one home.  I heard the doorbell (forgot to turn it off that day) and rolled out of bed barely opening my eyes on the way to the door.  I opened the door and saw a woman in her late 30s/ early 40s and a teenage girl (I assume it was probably her daughter).  

About two seconds after I opened the door they looked down, their eyes got really big and their jaws dropped to the floor, and the woman mumbled something to the girl and they left without saying a word to me.  I finally opened my eyes all the way and looked down.  Not only was I too tired to put on a shirt or pants, but I didn't check the flap on the front of my boxers, and mini fester was out getting some air, and he seemed excited about that.

In no way did I mean to do that, and I'm very glad they didn't call the police for something that was completely unintentional.  But they never came back as far as we know.

[LegendarySandwich]

I'll tell you how to get rid of Jehovah's Witnesses.  When I was in high school, they used to come to my parents' house all the time.  During the summer, when I was off school working night shift, I would be sleeping during the day.  My parents worked days, so I was the only one home.  I heard the doorbell (forgot to turn it off that day) and rolled out of bed barely opening my eyes on the way to the door.  I opened the door and saw a woman in her late 30s/ early 40s and a teenage girl (I assume it was probably her daughter).  

About two seconds after I opened the door they looked down, their eyes got really big and their jaws dropped to the floor, and the woman mumbled something to the girl and they left without saying a word to me.  I finally opened my eyes all the way and looked down.  Not only was I too tired to put on a shirt or pants, but I didn't check the flap on the front of my boxers, and mini fester was out getting some air, and he seemed excited about that.

In no way did I mean to do that, and I'm very glad they didn't call the police for something that was completely unintentional.  But they never came back as far as we know.

Wow. I never thought of flashing the Jehovah's Witnesses to get rid of them. Pretty original strategy, there.  

[Guardian85]

I'll tell you how to get rid of Jehovah's Witnesses.  When I was in high school, they used to come to my parents' house all the time.  During the summer, when I was off school working night shift, I would be sleeping during the day.  My parents worked days, so I was the only one home.  I heard the doorbell (forgot to turn it off that day) and rolled out of bed barely opening my eyes on the way to the door.  I opened the door and saw a woman in her late 30s/ early 40s and a teenage girl (I assume it was probably her daughter).  

About two seconds after I opened the door they looked down, their eyes got really big and their jaws dropped to the floor, and the woman mumbled something to the girl and they left without saying a word to me.  I finally opened my eyes all the way and looked down.  Not only was I too tired to put on a shirt or pants, but I didn't check the flap on the front of my boxers, and mini fester was out getting some air, and he seemed excited about that.

In no way did I mean to do that, and I'm very glad they didn't call the police for something that was completely unintentional.  But they never came back as far as we know.

   EPIC!

[Thumpalumpacus]

A simple "no thanks, I'm an atheist" seems to work for me.

[fester30]

If I have nothing else going on, I'll have a conversation with them.  I've only been doing this for about a month so I have some pretty limited experience with it.  However, at the very least the few people I've talked to, as well as one military chaplain, left the conversation realizing they needed to study the Bible a bit more since the atheist was running a scriptural end-around on every argument they presented.  It's how I feel every time I debate someone on baseball.  Every time I try to prove the Cubs are the best ever, I walk away feeling the need to research more ways to make my point.

[JoeBobSmith]

[fester30]

Just  ask a Mormon why "Prophet Smith" was so insistent on fucking his own adopted daughter from one of his many wives

If I was a Mormon, that would be an easy one.  Helloooo, the key word is "adopted."  She's not really related if she's adopted, just ask Woody Allen.  He did it and people still see his movies.  Therefore there should be nothing wrong with people going to Smithy's church.

[JoeBobSmith]

[Cecilie]

I think fester30 wins this one.

[KDbeads]

Ehh... just send them to my door.  90 pound hyper dane mix, black, prone to foaming at the mouth due to seizures when she gets too excited and my screen door latch is not the best at keeping her in.

Works every time.