Windows 10, The Continuing Adventure

[OldGit]

This thread started as a discussion of Windows 10.  What's it turned into?  I think it's time we all had a nice cup of tea.

[Davin]

I directly confront, which is the polar opposite of passive aggressive.

Sure Davin. As opposed to when you say shit like this:

Don't worry about it, your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

You are constantly passive-aggressive, and it's obnoxious and gets on a lot of people's nerves.

Bullshit. That is not passive aggressive, that is just how it is. It is clear and direct. Since no offense was taken on my side, there is no need for an apology. I mean, what worth is an apology in this case where no offense was taken?

Imagine someone offers you a gift, and you don't like the gift or don't feel it's necessary. Do you push it back to them and say it's "meaningless and worth nothing"? I hope not. But that's what that sounded like you were doing. It doesn't matter that you didn't feel the apology was necessary, he was offering a showing of respect to you and you just treated it like it was worthless. That's not cool.

Yes, I would. If some random stranger comes up and offers me a gift that I do not want, I will let them know that I find it meaningless and worthless to me. What is wrong with that? I don't want, need, nor deserve something as useless as respect from a random stranger.

I'm not saying it's all your fault that this discussion got hostile, but you have a pattern of doing things like this.

I am respecting the person by letting them know that they don't have to waste time and effort on useless things like that. I mean they can if they want, but I don't care about it and I let them know.

I understand that other people want respect from strangers, so I offer it so long as it is warranted, but I don't care nor require it myself.

[Davin]

Davin,

Apologies are one of those things people do to make things better.

In that case, it does not make things better or worse with me.

It doesn't really matter if you took offence or not, the POLITE thing to do would have been to accept my apology and move on. As it stands there is now clearly something between you and "this person" (your turn of phrase) ... clearly you are not as ambivalent to me as you would like people to believe. So, whether you were passive-aggressive as Firebird suggests or were not, that last has (undoubtedly IMO) made things worse.

You can apologize all you want, I don't want, need, nor care in the slightest for them. What evidence do you have my not being ambivalent towards you? Be careful not to assume that I am the same as other people nor that my language contains doublespeak. I say exactly what I mean, excepting of course typos and missing words. I am a very direct person.

With respect to my posts I repeat that at no point did make a solid claim that Windows was better than Linux. I always used phrases like "as far as I am concerned", "better for the things I want to do") meaning that all of them, in context or directly stated, were clearly my opinion and, regardless of your own opinion, something I am entitled to.

Again. And I do hope, though I do not place much into it, that you understand this: I don't care about that. What I wanted, was for you to simply let me know what things your were talking about when you said you wanted to "do things" in Windows that you couldn't do in Linux and what "things" you thought were easier for yourself to do in Windows. that was it. I don't give any shits about whether a person thinks one is better than the other. I have tried to steer the conversation back to these elusive "things" many times because those "things" are what I was interested in, while correcting what misrepresentations you made on the way.

I'm still interested in those things and I harbor no ill will towards you in the slightest, if you ever actually offer up those currently vague things.

Using those as your claim that I definitively stated "Windows was better" was effectively a lie on your part and it was that that led directly to my insult, the apology for which you subsequently rejected.

I didn't lie, you said one was better than the other (even if it was "in your opinion").

[Magdalena]

This thread started as a discussion of Windows 10.  What's it turned into?  I think it's time we all had a nice cup of tea.

I'll have some...

[Davin]

This thread started as a discussion of Windows 10.  What's it turned into?  I think it's time we all had a nice cup of tea.

I'll have some...

I don't like tea, but I'll have a soda.

[Magdalena]

^^^^

[Recusant]

. . . your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

As you are fond of saying, "Bullshit." His apology was a gesture of good will, and it was not meaningless and without worth. You say you personally have no use for it, but that is not what you said in immediate response (quoted above).

So, it means nothing to you, fine. The way humans generally manage to get along is by utilizing accepted forms of social lubricant to mend minor rifts that might otherwise deepen and result in completely unnecessary conflicts. Whether you like it or not, you're not above such things, and even at this late date you can learn to do something like accept an apology in good grace rather than snottily throwing it back in the face of the one who offered it.

You might say, "oh, but I wasn't being snotty." Again, bullshit. Whatever your intent, any objective observer would describe it as such.

[Davin]

. . . your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

As you are fond of saying, "Bullshit." His apology was a gesture of good will, and it was not meaningless and without worth. You say you personally have no use for it, but that is not what you said in immediate response (quoted above).

I don't care what it was intended for, I find it meaningless and worthless. Am I not allowed to express my opinion on such things?

So, it means nothing to you, fine. The way humans generally manage to get along is by utilizing accepted forms of social lubricant to mend minor rifts that might otherwise deepen and result in completely unnecessary conflicts. Whether you like it or not, you're not above such things, and even at this late date you can learn to do something like accept an apology in good grace rather than snottily throwing it back in the face of the one who offered it.

To what purpose would my accepting something I don't want or need just to satisfy someone else, serve? I can think of nothing that is to my benefit, but I am open to hear what benefits you think I might appreciate.

And shame on you for taking my statement out of context.

[...]I apologise for the name calling.

Don't worry about it, your apology is meaningless and worth nothing. As you have not offended me in the slightest, there is no use for an apology.

[Magdalena]

I've been here, listening and talking with people for six years. This is why I like some members a little bit more than others:

[Recusant]

. . . your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

As you are fond of saying, "Bullshit." His apology was a gesture of good will, and it was not meaningless and without worth. You say you personally have no use for it, but that is not what you said in immediate response (quoted above).

I don't care what it was intended for, I find it meaningless and worthless. Am I not allowed to express my opinion on such things?

You didn't express it as "your opinion." You made a categorical statement regarding the significance and worth of Kekerusy's apology.

So, it means nothing to you, fine. The way humans generally manage to get along is by utilizing accepted forms of social lubricant to mend minor rifts that might otherwise deepen and result in completely unnecessary conflicts. Whether you like it or not, you're not above such things, and even at this late date you can learn to do something like accept an apology in good grace rather than snottily throwing it back in the face of the one who offered it.

To what purpose would my accepting something I don't want or need just to satisfy someone else, serve? I can think of nothing that is to my benefit, but I am open to hear what benefits you think I might appreciate.

The benefit to you is that you learn one of the basic aspects of human interaction, which is to consider the impact of your behavior on others (that could very well have negative results for you down the line), and not only what immediately benefits you. It costs you nothing to give a neutral "apology accepted," signifying that you bear no ill will to the person offering the apology. Rejecting the apology on the other hand signifies that you are very possibly harboring animosity toward the person, and are at least entirely self regarding and unwilling to let bygones be bygones. Whether you look at it that way or not, that is how your behavior will be viewed. Try to understand that.

[Recusant]

And shame on you for taking my statement out of context.

[...]I apologise for the name calling.

Don't worry about it, your apology is meaningless and worth nothing. As you have not offended me in the slightest, there is no use for an apology.

The context doesn't change the categorical nature of your statement.

[Tank]

Cats. Fucking herding cats! SMH.

[Davin]

. . . your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

As you are fond of saying, "Bullshit." His apology was a gesture of good will, and it was not meaningless and without worth. You say you personally have no use for it, but that is not what you said in immediate response (quoted above).

I don't care what it was intended for, I find it meaningless and worthless. Am I not allowed to express my opinion on such things?

You didn't express it as "your opinion." You made a categorical statement regarding the significance and worth of Kekerusy's apology.

Then what significance or worth does it have? Did it have some other meaning rather than towards or involving me? Did it have some kind of secondary purpose? If it did, I am unaware of them and if you are aware of them, then you should explain them.

So, it means nothing to you, fine. The way humans generally manage to get along is by utilizing accepted forms of social lubricant to mend minor rifts that might otherwise deepen and result in completely unnecessary conflicts. Whether you like it or not, you're not above such things, and even at this late date you can learn to do something like accept an apology in good grace rather than snottily throwing it back in the face of the one who offered it.

To what purpose would my accepting something I don't want or need just to satisfy someone else, serve? I can think of nothing that is to my benefit, but I am open to hear what benefits you think I might appreciate.

The benefit to you is that you learn one of the basic aspects of human interaction, which is to consider the impact of your behavior on others (that could very well have negative results for you down the line), and not only what immediately benefits you.

Like what negative results? I doubt there are any that I care about, and it's not like I haven't thought up a thousand different possibilities, but I am open to hearing them.

It costs you nothing to give a neutral "apology accepted," signifying that you bear no ill will to the person offering the apology.

It also cost me nothing to let the person know I don't care about apologies. I also said many times I harbor no ill will towards them.

Rejecting the apology on the other hand signifies that you are very possibly harboring animosity toward the person, and are at least entirely self regarding and unwilling to let bygones be bygones. Whether you look at it that way or not, that is how your behavior will be viewed. Try to understand that.

I can't stop people from irrationally coming to conclusions about what I say, and I'm more than a bit exhausted from my trying. You can erroneously conclude that I harbor animosity towards the person, I can't stop that. I can't make people read what I wrote for what I wrote, and I've tried a lot of different ways. I've even refrained from my usual sprinkling of "curse words" because the weak minded associate those with feelings of anger. How far must I bend in care of other people's irrationality?

And shame on you for taking my statement out of context.

[...]I apologise for the name calling.

Don't worry about it, your apology is meaningless and worth nothing. As you have not offended me in the slightest, there is no use for an apology.

The context doesn't change the categorical nature of your statement.

It does change it, because I told the person not to worry about it first and foremost. I find that of great importance as they are words that I meant. I didn't want the person to worry about it. Then I gave my opinion on it.

[Magdalena]

Cats. Fucking herding cats! SMH.

Oh! It's not so bad...

[Firebird]

Like what negative results? I doubt there are any that I care about, and it's not like I haven't thought up a thousand different possibilities, but I am open to hearing them.

Like having friends. Like earning respect among your peers. Like having people take your opinions seriously. Presumably you're interacting with people on a public forum because you want to want to hear what they have to say, have them consider your opinions seriously, and maybe get something out of it yourself. Well, you're not going to accomplish that when you dismiss others in this manner.

It also cost me nothing to let the person know I don't care about apologies.

It cost you respect among some of us. Maybe you don't care about that. But if so, then I don't understand why you choose to interact with us. It also costs HAF because it reflects badly on us when one of our longtime members acts this way.

I can't stop people from irrationally coming to conclusions about what I say, and I'm more than a bit exhausted from my trying. You can erroneously conclude that I harbor animosity towards the person, I can't stop that. I can't make people read what I wrote for what I wrote, and I've tried a lot of different ways. I've even refrained from my usually sprinkling of "curse words" because the weak minded associate those with feelings of anger. How far must I bend in care of other people's irrationality?

If multiple people are telling you that your comments are rubbing people the wrong way and casting you in a bad light, do you ever stop to wonder if perhaps that's so? Or do you just continue to assume everyone else is wrong and you're right? You constantly accuse people of being irrational, misrepresenting you, etc, even when more than one person disagrees with you.

It does change it, because I told the person not to worry about it first and foremost. I find that of great importance as they are words that I meant. I didn't want the person to worry about it. Then I gave my opinion on it.

You truly don't realize how it sounds, do you. Read it again:

Don't worry about it, your apology is meaningless and worth nothing.

The second half completely negates the "Don't worry about it." So no, it doesn't matter that you said not to worry about it first, because when you read the whole thing, you sound like you're trampling on his apology and just being sarcastic in the first half of the sentence. Trust me that's how it comes off for the vast majority of people. I'm surprised you don't see it. You're a smart guy, but you seem to lack the ability or willingness to look at the situation from another person's point of view.