What's on your mind today?

[jumbojak]

Yesterday I brushed my niece's arm with my hand to remove a bug fat fly that was walking on it.

'No!' she said angrily. 'I like it when they tickle me!'

'Flies are really dirty', I replied. 'They carry all sorts of tiny invisible bugs that give people diseases'.

'No, they don't. There's no such thing as tiny, invisible bugs.'



(Maybe I should have said something more like 'so small we can't see the with only our eyes' instead of 'invisible'...)

She's turning out to be a fine sceptic. Maybe there's hope she'll be a scientist one day?

Though...since she isn't cursed with older siblings she still believes in Santa at the ripe old age of nine...

Yes, you have to be very careful how you explain things to children. They're more clever than most people give them credit for but when they have a concept like "invisible" set one way in their heads it can be difficult to backtrack when an explanation doesn't sink in they way you had hoped.

Yes, I'm learning that the hard way. Who gave her permission to grow so fast? It seems like only a couple a years ago when she was this helpless thing who did nothing but eat and sleep all day. Now she is making up her own mind on a variety of subjects.

It seems like only a couple of years ago because it was only a couple of years ago.

[xSilverPhinx]

I'm feeling burnt out, like I need to take a break from everything. I haven't been posting much here and haven't been socialising much irl either. Mostly just keeping to myself a wallowing in my own negative thoughts. 

What sort of negative thoughts? You have a LOT to be proud of. You went back to school when a lot of people would've thought that they were too old. You are successfully building a career in your field as a published scientist. You are gaining experience as a lecturer and teacher, and if your own assessment is accurate you were pretty good at it out of the gate.

If you need to take a step back and recharge, do it but don't stop moving forward or let yourself become your own worst enemy. In addition to being proud of yourself and what you've managed to achieve you should know without question that there are others who are very proud of you as well. I can't be the only one. The membership of HAF can't be the only ones either.

Thanks, JJ. I feel like I'm in a strange place emotionally, it doesn't feel like sadness or depression, more like the stress is overwhelming sometimes. Yesterday I felt like just rolling up on the floor and crying for no reason I can pinpoint...just out of the blue like that. I don't know what's going on, this is new territory.

I've taken a break from the lab but couldn't distance myself from family problems, so the holidays were emotionally draining. Maybe once I go back to my 'normal' life things will get better. I've just got to look after myself I guess. I'm afraid of having serious mental health problems and possibly lose everything I've fought for.

But anyway, I don't want to burden others with my problems, it's just nice to have a place I can rant sometimes. 

[xSilverPhinx]

Yesterday I brushed my niece's arm with my hand to remove a bug fat fly that was walking on it.

'No!' she said angrily. 'I like it when they tickle me!'

'Flies are really dirty', I replied. 'They carry all sorts of tiny invisible bugs that give people diseases'.

'No, they don't. There's no such thing as tiny, invisible bugs.'



(Maybe I should have said something more like 'so small we can't see the with only our eyes' instead of 'invisible'...)

She's turning out to be a fine sceptic. Maybe there's hope she'll be a scientist one day?

Though...since she isn't cursed with older siblings she still believes in Santa at the ripe old age of nine...

Yes, you have to be very careful how you explain things to children. They're more clever than most people give them credit for but when they have a concept like "invisible" set one way in their heads it can be difficult to backtrack when an explanation doesn't sink in they way you had hoped.

Yes, I'm learning that the hard way. Who gave her permission to grow so fast? It seems like only a couple a years ago when she was this helpless thing who did nothing but eat and sleep all day. Now she is making up her own mind on a variety of subjects.

It seems like only a couple of years ago because it was only a couple of years ago.

No, JJ.  You'll realise that the older you get the faster time seems to pass. When I, at nearly 33 years of age say 2 years, in actual chronological terms I mean 6 years, 3 months 24 days.

[Dark Lightning]

I'm bummed out. Our family rescued a dog almost a year ago from the local animal shelter. It has occasionally bullied one of the other dogs. Not a big deal, just growling. But today she attacked the little dog and I had to take it to the vet. Fortunately the little dog just has the doggy equivalent of a black eye. But it is swollen enough to required steroids, and pain medication as well. This dog was chosen to be a companion for my son, who is depressed, among other things. We have noticed that the little dog (Chihuahua) has been mostly staying in the master bedroom. Two days ago she left there, and the big dog growled at her. My son and I both scolded the big dog. In talking with the vet and my wife, we have decided that the dog has to go back to the shelter. The part that bothers me the most is that we were told that the big dog (a beagle/dachshund mix) was taken to the shelter because she "growled at the kids if they tried to take her toys". Well, duh, of course she would, so what would we suspect? I am convinced that we were underinformed, whether by the people at the shelter or the surrendering family not giving them the whole truth. No telling what the chain of events was with those conversations, but this time the shelter people will be fully informed. If it had been a child, the dog would have gone back at the first instance. But we would be watching a child all day, not leaving it alone for a few hours like we would a pet dog. Interestingly enough, it doesn't give our other dog any kind of grief.

[jumbojak]

Yesterday I brushed my niece's arm with my hand to remove a bug fat fly that was walking on it.

'No!' she said angrily. 'I like it when they tickle me!'

'Flies are really dirty', I replied. 'They carry all sorts of tiny invisible bugs that give people diseases'.

'No, they don't. There's no such thing as tiny, invisible bugs.'



(Maybe I should have said something more like 'so small we can't see the with only our eyes' instead of 'invisible'...)

She's turning out to be a fine sceptic. Maybe there's hope she'll be a scientist one day?

Though...since she isn't cursed with older siblings she still believes in Santa at the ripe old age of nine...

Yes, you have to be very careful how you explain things to children. They're more clever than most people give them credit for but when they have a concept like "invisible" set one way in their heads it can be difficult to backtrack when an explanation doesn't sink in they way you had hoped.

Yes, I'm learning that the hard way. Who gave her permission to grow so fast? It seems like only a couple a years ago when she was this helpless thing who did nothing but eat and sleep all day. Now she is making up her own mind on a variety of subjects.

It seems like only a couple of years ago because it was only a couple of years ago.

No, JJ.  You'll realise that the older you get the faster time seems to pass. When I, at nearly 33 years of age say 2 years, in actual chronological terms I mean 6 years, 3 months 24 days.

Ha, you're only as old as you feel and at 31 going on 55 time should pass in a blink... Hang on, what was I doing?

[xSilverPhinx]

I'm bummed out. Our family rescued a dog almost a year ago from the local animal shelter. It has occasionally bullied one of the other dogs. Not a big deal, just growling. But today she attacked the little dog and I had to take it to the vet. Fortunately the little dog just has the doggy equivalent of a black eye. But it is swollen enough to required steroids, and pain medication as well. This dog was chosen to be a companion for my son, who is depressed, among other things. We have noticed that the little dog (Chihuahua) has been mostly staying in the master bedroom. Two days ago she left there, and the big dog growled at her. My son and I both scolded the big dog. In talking with the vet and my wife, we have decided that the dog has to go back to the shelter. The part that bothers me the most is that we were told that the big dog (a beagle/dachshund mix) was taken to the shelter because she "growled at the kids if they tried to take her toys". Well, duh, of course she would, so what would we suspect? I am convinced that we were underinformed, whether by the people at the shelter or the surrendering family not giving them the whole truth. No telling what the chain of events was with those conversations, but this time the shelter people will be fully informed. If it had been a child, the dog would have gone back at the first instance. But we would be watching a child all day, not leaving it alone for a few hours like we would a pet dog. Interestingly enough, it doesn't give our other dog any kind of grief.

Damn, that sucks! 

Luckily the dog didn't touch the child.

Two females, though? Are they spayed? When I had two female dogs they would synchronise their cycles and both get very aggressive towards each other just prior to being on heat.

[jumbojak]

I'm bummed out. Our family rescued a dog almost a year ago from the local animal shelter. It has occasionally bullied one of the other dogs. Not a big deal, just growling. But today she attacked the little dog and I had to take it to the vet. Fortunately the little dog just has the doggy equivalent of a black eye. But it is swollen enough to required steroids, and pain medication as well. This dog was chosen to be a companion for my son, who is depressed, among other things. We have noticed that the little dog (Chihuahua) has been mostly staying in the master bedroom. Two days ago she left there, and the big dog growled at her. My son and I both scolded the big dog. In talking with the vet and my wife, we have decided that the dog has to go back to the shelter. The part that bothers me the most is that we were told that the big dog (a beagle/dachshund mix) was taken to the shelter because she "growled at the kids if they tried to take her toys". Well, duh, of course she would, so what would we suspect? I am convinced that we were underinformed, whether by the people at the shelter or the surrendering family not giving them the whole truth. No telling what the chain of events was with those conversations, but this time the shelter people will be fully informed. If it had been a child, the dog would have gone back at the first instance. But we would be watching a child all day, not leaving it alone for a few hours like we would a pet dog. Interestingly enough, it doesn't give our other dog any kind of grief.

That's unfortunate. Shelter animals should have their warts disclosed. Hopefully they find the dog a home that is suitable. .

[xSilverPhinx]

Yesterday I brushed my niece's arm with my hand to remove a bug fat fly that was walking on it.

'No!' she said angrily. 'I like it when they tickle me!'

'Flies are really dirty', I replied. 'They carry all sorts of tiny invisible bugs that give people diseases'.

'No, they don't. There's no such thing as tiny, invisible bugs.'



(Maybe I should have said something more like 'so small we can't see the with only our eyes' instead of 'invisible'...)

She's turning out to be a fine sceptic. Maybe there's hope she'll be a scientist one day?

Though...since she isn't cursed with older siblings she still believes in Santa at the ripe old age of nine...

Yes, you have to be very careful how you explain things to children. They're more clever than most people give them credit for but when they have a concept like "invisible" set one way in their heads it can be difficult to backtrack when an explanation doesn't sink in they way you had hoped.

Yes, I'm learning that the hard way. Who gave her permission to grow so fast? It seems like only a couple a years ago when she was this helpless thing who did nothing but eat and sleep all day. Now she is making up her own mind on a variety of subjects.

It seems like only a couple of years ago because it was only a couple of years ago.

No, JJ.  You'll realise that the older you get the faster time seems to pass. When I, at nearly 33 years of age say 2 years, in actual chronological terms I mean 6 years, 3 months 24 days.

Ha, you're only as old as you feel and at 31 going on 55 time should pass in a blink... Hang on, what was I doing?

[Sandra Craft]

I'm bummed out. Our family rescued a dog almost a year ago from the local animal shelter. It has occasionally bullied one of the other dogs. Not a big deal, just growling. But today she attacked the little dog and I had to take it to the vet. Fortunately the little dog just has the doggy equivalent of a black eye. But it is swollen enough to required steroids, and pain medication as well. This dog was chosen to be a companion for my son, who is depressed, among other things. We have noticed that the little dog (Chihuahua) has been mostly staying in the master bedroom. Two days ago she left there, and the big dog growled at her. My son and I both scolded the big dog. In talking with the vet and my wife, we have decided that the dog has to go back to the shelter. The part that bothers me the most is that we were told that the big dog (a beagle/dachshund mix) was taken to the shelter because she "growled at the kids if they tried to take her toys". Well, duh, of course she would, so what would we suspect? I am convinced that we were underinformed, whether by the people at the shelter or the surrendering family not giving them the whole truth. No telling what the chain of events was with those conversations, but this time the shelter people will be fully informed. If it had been a child, the dog would have gone back at the first instance. But we would be watching a child all day, not leaving it alone for a few hours like we would a pet dog. Interestingly enough, it doesn't give our other dog any kind of grief.

I'm so sorry to hear that, with a history of attacking the big dog's chances aren't good.  It's true shelter workers should be forth-coming with all information about an animal up for adoption, good or bad.  I don't know whether withholding info is deliberate to increase chances of adoption, or if some information really just falls thru the cracks.  The shelters around here are staffed mainly by volunteers who often seem disorganized.

[Dark Lightning]

We're now looking at a no-kill shelter or adoption by a person who has no other dog, or it may be possible to train the dog to not attack the other dogs. That is up in the air. They've all been spayed, so coming into heat shouldn't be an issue. My original post was after a conversation with my wife and the vet; subsequent to that my wife came up with the other ideas. It's actually a pretty cool dog, except for these attacks on the one dog. We've always had little pot-licker dogs who were there solely for companionship. The beagle/dachshund mix would likely kill any back yard intruder. That's a welcome attribute if we had back yard intruders that were a threat, but this is a suburban neighborhood without that sort of threat. I don't want the dog dead. We'll be working through the issues. We're going to put her in the side yard while my son is gone. She'll have room to run and a warm bed, and will sleep inside at night. I'm retired, but not home all day. We'll try to work it out. This post is a little bit free-thinking style, so may be a little incoherent...

[hermes2015]

I'm feeling burnt out, like I need to take a break from everything. I haven't been posting much here and haven't been socialising much irl either. Mostly just keeping to myself a wallowing in my own negative thoughts. 

What sort of negative thoughts? You have a LOT to be proud of. You went back to school when a lot of people would've thought that they were too old. You are successfully building a career in your field as a published scientist. You are gaining experience as a lecturer and teacher, and if your own assessment is accurate you were pretty good at it out of the gate.

If you need to take a step back and recharge, do it but don't stop moving forward or let yourself become your own worst enemy. In addition to being proud of yourself and what you've managed to achieve you should know without question that there are others who are very proud of you as well. I can't be the only one. The membership of HAF can't be the only ones either.

Well said, and I second every word of that.

[xSilverPhinx]

I'm feeling burnt out, like I need to take a break from everything. I haven't been posting much here and haven't been socialising much irl either. Mostly just keeping to myself a wallowing in my own negative thoughts. 

What sort of negative thoughts? You have a LOT to be proud of. You went back to school when a lot of people would've thought that they were too old. You are successfully building a career in your field as a published scientist. You are gaining experience as a lecturer and teacher, and if your own assessment is accurate you were pretty good at it out of the gate.

If you need to take a step back and recharge, do it but don't stop moving forward or let yourself become your own worst enemy. In addition to being proud of yourself and what you've managed to achieve you should know without question that there are others who are very proud of you as well. I can't be the only one. The membership of HAF can't be the only ones either.

Well said, and I second every word of that.

Thanks Hermes. Just typing that rant made me feel better, that you guys read it is a huge plus. I apologise, however. I don't want to 'contaminate' anyone with my negativity. It will pass. I'm sure it will.

Maybe I should start a journal. Putting my thoughts somewhere helps.

[Tank]

I'm bummed out. Our family rescued a dog almost a year ago from the local animal shelter. It has occasionally bullied one of the other dogs. Not a big deal, just growling. But today she attacked the little dog and I had to take it to the vet. Fortunately the little dog just has the doggy equivalent of a black eye. But it is swollen enough to required steroids, and pain medication as well. This dog was chosen to be a companion for my son, who is depressed, among other things. We have noticed that the little dog (Chihuahua) has been mostly staying in the master bedroom. Two days ago she left there, and the big dog growled at her. My son and I both scolded the big dog. In talking with the vet and my wife, we have decided that the dog has to go back to the shelter. The part that bothers me the most is that we were told that the big dog (a beagle/dachshund mix) was taken to the shelter because she "growled at the kids if they tried to take her toys". Well, duh, of course she would, so what would we suspect? I am convinced that we were underinformed, whether by the people at the shelter or the surrendering family not giving them the whole truth. No telling what the chain of events was with those conversations, but this time the shelter people will be fully informed. If it had been a child, the dog would have gone back at the first instance. But we would be watching a child all day, not leaving it alone for a few hours like we would a pet dog. Interestingly enough, it doesn't give our other dog any kind of grief.

That's a rotten thing to happen. And as you are well aware dogs can be complex and do react to in different ways to different situations. It could be that in a previous dynamic the dog had not reacted the way it does in the dynamic it finds itself in now. All that said I would have done exactly what you did.

[Tank]

I had the talk with my helper at work yesterday. It was just about as uncomfortable a thing to do I can imagine. Hopefully he'll straighten up. He apologized several times. I make a terrible "boss" if you could really call me that.

Well you've broken the ice on the subject so now he knows you know. The best advice I can offer is pick him up gently each and every time you suspect there is an issue. Don't ignore it or it can escalate to the point where it blows up in your face. Offer any help and assistance you can in your position.

[Tank]

I'm feeling burnt out, like I need to take a break from everything. I haven't been posting much here and haven't been socialising much irl either. Mostly just keeping to myself a wallowing in my own negative thoughts. 

Relax and do something you like. Dig out your games consul!