What's on your mind today?

[DeterminedJuliet]

DeterminedJuliet:  You're grumpy?  Noo!  This is the HAPPY Atheist forum.  (No grumpiness allowed.)  'Sup?

Ohhh, there are grumpies about. You may come across a certain grey grumpy lumpy in your travels here 

[Buddy]

DeterminedJuliet:  You're grumpy?  Noo!  This is the HAPPY Atheist forum.  (No grumpiness allowed.)  'Sup?

Ohhh, there are grumpies about. You may come across a certain grey grumpy lumpy in your travels here 

I was just going to comment about the Grumpy Lumpy

[Phren-Seeker]

Aha!  Yes, so I've seen.  The Grumpy Lumpy...I'll consider myself warned 

[The Magic Pudding]

Australia is going to sell uranium to India, there had been a ban on countries which hadn't signed the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, which included India.
People made the case India is the worlds biggest democracy, they've agreed to conditions, it is a cleaner fuel, and they're not bad chaps after all.

I just heard on the news Pakistan wants uranium too, I found that kind of funny.

[Sweetdeath]

Devil's food with vanilla whipped frosting. <3

[Tank]

4 new accounts overnight! Woot! 

[Asmodean]

4 new accounts overnight! Woot! 

...With none banz0rd for advertising and shit?  What's the world coming to?!

[Tank]

4 new accounts overnight! Woot! 

...With none banz0rd for advertising and shit?  What's the world coming to?!

No, about 20 banned and deleted, 4 REAL people (well one may turn out a spammer)!

[Asmodean]

No, about 20 banned and deleted, 4 REAL people (well one may turn out a spammer)!

How did we ever manage without you in the modseat, Tank?! ??? Seems so long ago, I don't even remember

[Buddy]

4 new accounts overnight! Woot! 

Yes, my fingers got quite the workout welcoming them all. 

[DeterminedJuliet]

Devil's food with vanilla whipped frosting. <3

Hmmmm, I think I now know what may improve my bad mood

[not your typical...]

In about two weeks my fate this winter will be determined.

[Siz]

In about two weeks my fate this winter will be determined.

Why? You finally giving Atheism a go? 

[Tank]

In about two weeks my fate this winter will be determined.

Details girl, details!

[not your typical...]

In about two weeks my fate this winter will be determined.

Details girl, details!

well I've got a few major deadlines to be met. firstly, my mother is determining what we're doing for Christmas, meaning whether or not she's going to invite her friend's family (who is a pastor). To explain why this is such a big thing, I'll revisit what happened over Thanksgiving. Everytime I'm around her and her family, she yells at me for not being good enough, her two daughters piss me off because they're such close-minded pricks, and her husband is the only decent one, but even he simply wants to preach 24/7. The day before Thanksgiving, I got a lecture. This is what I wrote that day:
"I swear to GOD that if you don't get me the fuck outta here NOW, I'm going to jail. That's all to it, I'm going to mother fucking jail. The bitch just had the nerve to piss me off in three ways at once. First, she tells me that I'm very disrespectful to my aunt, and while I know that, over the past 2 weeks, I've gotten so much fucking better it's ridiculous. And I know my aunt didn't say shit to her cause she's fucking happy that for once in ages a conversation between me and her doesn't end with her yelling, me yelling back, her grounding me, and me rolling my eyes and threatening her with a fucking knife! The NERVE of that damn bitch. Then she calls me a fucking hypocrite because I 'respect' her but not my aunt. No you fucking moron, I Don't Know You, NOR Do I Trust You, that's why I'm quite and pretend to be nice. I have no respect for that fatass bitch who tells me that I'm fat and that I need to lose weight. I mean, for fucks sake, have you LOOKED in a mirror. When God made me, He broke the mold. When he made her fatass, He broke the damn scale. It's fucking ridiculous for her to say shit about me. Then she preached at me... Do you know how much it pisses me off when people preach at me?! I almost broke the damn van and kicked her in the head. Of course she decides to do this when we're sitting in a parking lot, mom just left the car, so it's me, aunt, her and her two kids. And she starts to fucking preach at me. THEN guess what? And this is the fucking icing on the cake. She compared me to my father. I AM NOTHING LIKE THAT ABUSIVE, DRUNK, POSER, HYPOCRITE, ASSHOLE! I almost jumped her. Thank GOD my aunt looked at me and shook her head. She's gotten better and so have I. We get along. And the reason I act like I do is cuz she has to get to fucking know me. It's like .00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of how I act around u guys, and that's too disrespectful? THAT'S FUCKING DISRESPECTFUL!?!?! Fucking bitch doesn't know what disrespectful is! I'll show her disrespectful! And HOW DARE SHE SAY I'M JUST LIKE MY FATHER! SHE DOESN'T FUCKING KNOW ME!!! Dammit! The only thing she got right was that I'm a fucking hypocrite, but not for the reasons she thinks. No, it's because I tell myself all the time that I don't give a damn what people think, and you know what? I normally don't. But when it's some bitch who thinks that just because she's spent a half a semester in a psychology class that she can analyze me in less than a day, and I'm not allowed to speak my piece, then yeah, I care. I really care, cuz ALL I WANNA FUCKING DO IS PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE, but I can't and that hurts so much that I cried........ I swear, I NEVER WANT TO COME HERE AGAIN! Every time I come near that bitch, there's always something about me that needs to change, that's wrong just plain wrong and it;s not acceptable. Who the hell does she think she is? Oh, I know who she thinks she is. She's God's gift to mankind, His personal prophet to me and every other child she comes in contact with. And she had the nerve to call me an attention seeker! DAMMIT! I'm still so fucking pissed I'm about to go on another fucking crying jag. Wow, 24 hours in the same house as her and I'm crying more now than I ever have in my entire damn life, INCLUDING when I was a baby. GET ME THE FUCK OUTTA HERE! I can't take much more of this bull. I'm not gonna kill myself or shit like that, she's not fucking worth it, even though it would teach her a damn good lesson. But you know what, fuck it. FUCK IT ALL. What doesn't kill me makes me stronger right? And you know what the worst part is? My own mother doesn't even say shit. My mom KNOWS I've gotten better and that I'm trying for the first time in years, but you know what? I'm done! I can't take living life as some hypocritical pawn of everyone esle's scheme. I'm done with the fake smiles and pretending that everything;s ok. I FUCKING QUIT! I'm not gonna take any more shit. I can't WAIT to get away from this dead weight I'm forced to call my relatives. The only real family I have is you guys. The only people who know me, and don't try to change me into something I'm never gonna be, but instead try to make me a better me. And for this, I thank you.
PS. I think my cry jag is over. "
So being in a house with her for a week is pretty much not an option. Plus my ex is trying to get back with me, and while i don't want him back, if they come up, I could use his house as a crash pad, since my mom likes his parents and they love me.
Secondly, I've been solicited to post a full EP for a contest my friend wants us to enter in. It's not that I don't already have stuff done, I just don't like cameras... or recording devices of any sort. (Stems from low self-esteem that is quite easily covered by extreme acts of arrogance.)
Thirdly, winter, while being my favorite time of year due to the freezing weather, is also my worst. Last year on top of having the abusive ex, had been granted Vicodin and Ambien to help with pain and sleeping troubles, and had a friend who didn't like taking his anti-depressants so he gave them to me. That was not a good idea...
And lastly, as much as it would pain most people around me for me to say this, I hate the holiday season. All it does is cause me more trouble, due to all the 'togetherness' of 'family' and the 'helpful talks' they love to have with me so much. My mother just tells me to grit and bear it, because at least I can escape to my friends or my mind once they're gone, but she has to hear it all the time in phone calls. "How could you let her be so disrespectful?! Why would you let her do that to herself?" (In refrence to me dying my hair and upon being told that they didn't like it, me saying, "Ok, well then good thing it's not your hair.") But on the bright side, I've got about two more years to put up with the bs. (And really less than that, cuz as soon as i can legally start driving, I'll try to be as far from here as possible.)