I pity you...

[godistruth]

Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

[The Magic Pudding]

Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Well I don't know, what are you offering?
The Giant Rubber Duck promises to lead me over the hills and far away.
We will spend eternity in a nice bubbly bath that never goes cold.
Can Christianity compete with this?

[Sophus]

Yes, I don't know about you but I have been promised a trip to Sugar Candy Mountain!

[Whitney]

Is it bad that the only time I come close to talking to god is when people post stuff like this and I think "Oh lord

[The Magic Pudding]

Is it bad that the only time I come close to talking to god is when people post stuff like this and I think "Oh lord

Oh come on, this one isn't so bad.
He doesn't seem to be gloating over our imminent roasting.
He sounds like a genuinely concerned ten year old.

[epepke]

I pity you for not appreciating the glory and wonder of seeking to understand the universe.  I really do.  God-concepts are so utterly banal compared to the majesty that we have come even slightly to understand about the universe.

[skwurll]

I was going to post a witty Voltaire quote, but then I decided to just come out and say it.

Your god isn't real. Your fear of hell is irrational. The church is lying to you.

I think I've covered it

[Squid]

Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Why have you not offered yourself to the true god, the god of metal:

[i_am_i]

Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Where do I sign up? What do I do? I'm so...conflicted. Can you help me...please?

[Tank]

[hismikeness]

I was going to join Christianity but then I just went about living my life.

[philosoraptor]

Yes, I don't know about you but I have been promised a trip to Sugar Candy Mountain!

It's a magical leoplurodon, Chaaaaarlie!

[Asmodean]

There is no god other than Cthulhu and Tom Cruise is his profet.

You are on the wrong path, my dear preachy newb.  

[epepke]

I pity the fool who don't eat modammas.

[GAYtheist]

We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Noone has ever said we came from monkies, just that we have a common ancestor.
There is more evidence for the theory of the big bang than creation...and the bible is full of so many wholes it's laughable, at best.
I must do nothing. And, according to the bible, we are in Hell...seeing as Lucifer was banished to Earth, not some fantasical lair under Earth's crust.
Oh, and I refuse to join any organization that constantly tells me that me loving me gay partner is not only a bad thing, but also worth of burning and being tortured for all of eternity. These are my opinions...