Former "believers": what was your turning point?

[Thumpalumpacus]

I was raised a Southern Baptist, but when I was eight, my family moved to Iran in the Middle East.  Not many SoBs there, if you take my meaning, so my sister and I started attending different services (Mom and Dad exercised parental privilege and didn't go); so I got to see a bunch of different sects each claiming they had The Truth.

Our first Ramadan in-country was shocking; he last Friday of the month is spent in self-flagellating expiation.  I didn't know what the hell those words meant back then, but I knew that what I was seeing wasn't right.  Still I continued to believe, smug and complacent that my religion didn't make me do stuff like beat myself in public; but this was the start of a long process.

In 1978, we fled the revolution that overthrew the Shah.  The evils that I witnessed during those days has never left my mind's eye; I'm 43 and can still remember the smell of gunpowder in the air as the soldiers fired on the rioters outside my school.  I spent about a year digesting my experiences, and slowly coming to grips with the problem of evil; all the while afraid to say what I secretly felt, that I didn't believe in God anymore.

[Businessocks]

Wow.  So many great responses.  Thanks to everyone for sharing.  TheFish, that was part of my questioning as well:  If I were born in China or Africa, I knew I wouldn't be a Christian more than likely.  Everything seemed so determined by chance (where, when, to whom I was born), rather than an omniscient god, at that point.  And Thump, that's an incredible story!

[Thumpalumpacus]

Heh, yeah, it's been a hell of a life.  

[Tank]

Heh, yeah, it's been a hell of a life.  

[Thumpalumpacus]

I've made my peace with either outcome, and to be honest, an airplane crash sounds more charming than cancer.

[Tank]

I've made my peace with either outcome, and to be honest, an airplane crash sounds more charming than cancer.

Quite right, as long as it was a single seat aircraft. You could always do a free fall jump over the sea?

EDIT: With no parachute.

[Thumpalumpacus]

<stays inside well-flying airplanes> ------------------------------------------------------------------------------>>

[dogsmycopilot]

Anyway, I'm just curious what others finally got stuck on or realized the insanity of that turned them away from religion.

I was never christian. I went to paganism early and stayed pagan for many years (from about sixth grade until after I had children.) Then I found satanism. Satanism is an atheistic philosophy. But I felt like I had truly found who I was when I found it so I felt myself leaving paganism. I still called myself pagan for a while longer but the more I read the more I was sure. Then one day about two or three years ago now I found a video by Martin Willett of Debate Unlimited on true martyrs. It just hit me like a ton of bricks all at once that there was no way I was ever going to worship a god really. I had spent years searching for something that never quite felt right for a reason- it wasn't right. At that point I put all thoughts of the spiritual aside and have been a happy satanist ever since. I am an atheist yes, but that tells you nothing about my philosophy, which is satanic. I found my place and it fits me like a glove.

[Asmodean]

Never believed in gods, but there was this former buddy of mine that once started talking to me about all that supernatural crap and eventually told me that I would "come to believe when I grew up"... I think that was the moment I realised how far above him I was intellectually... And that I was an atheist.

[none123]

It was when I was going through a really bad time, always depressed and even suicidal. And I thought about all my problems, and I figured all my problems stemmed from religion (I had a really, really demanding religion). And then I started thinking why do I even believe in god, and the religion. We were taught growing up how you know if it is true is you read the scriptures and then pray and ask if it is true, and if you feel warm and good inside then that is the spirit telling you it is true. And I admit I had that feeling. But then I figured out 2 things: first they can't set the rules, tell me x means that god exists. They can't say if your back itches at all during the praryer that means everything is true.  And then 2nd, it is the same feeling I have when I watch a good, fictional, movie. Doesn't mean anything. I've been a lot happier since then, though I've had to keep my beliefs hidden, and have to still go to church sometimes to avoid all my family either treating me horribly, or disowning me altogether.

And I've been calculating how much actual time I've wasted on religion, and it makes me pretty mad. 1 whole day a week for about 23 years, 2 entire years, enough money that probably work out to being around 1 year worth of work down the drain. Not to mention an hour class every school day for 4 years, scripture study, religious activities during the week, probably equals about 7 entire years in my 29 years alive totally wasted. If I had 7 extra years to do what ever I want, I could have paid off my house, or gotten a degree and a good job, or just had fun instead of mindless crap. /end rant.

[Tank]

It was when I was going through a really bad time, always depressed and even suicidal. And I thought about all my problems, and I figured all my problems stemmed from religion (I had a really, really demanding religion). And then I started thinking why do I even believe in god, and the religion. We were taught growing up how you know if it is true is you read the scriptures and then pray and ask if it is true, and if you feel warm and good inside then that is the spirit telling you it is true. And I admit I had that feeling. But then I figured out 2 things: first they can't set the rules, tell me x means that god exists. They can't say if your back itches at all during the praryer that means everything is true.  And then 2nd, it is the same feeling I have when I watch a good, fictional, movie. Doesn't mean anything. I've been a lot happier since then, though I've had to keep my beliefs hidden, and have to still go to church sometimes to avoid all my family either treating me horribly, or disowning me altogether.

And I've been calculating how much actual time I've wasted on religion, and it makes me pretty mad. 1 whole day a week for about 23 years, 2 entire years, enough money that probably work out to being around 1 year worth of work down the drain. Not to mention an hour class every school day for 4 years, scripture study, religious activities during the week, probably equals about 7 entire years in my 29 years alive totally wasted. If I had 7 extra years to do what ever I want, I could have paid off my house, or gotten a degree and a good job, or just had fun instead of mindless crap. /end rant.

 Rant on!

[GAYtheist]

I stopped believing in "God" about twelve years ago when I was 16, at least that's the last I tried to convince myself I believed in him. Because of the things I experienced, because of my brother (I won't go into specifics, as I had a tough therapy session yesterday that stirred some memories that are still running around a bit in my head...) my brain grew to be very, if not extremely logical, and analytical. I was also forced by my brother to read the bible. I honestly, thinking back on it, think I stopped believing as far back as 8 years old. I was raised Catholic, and would go to church more to have an escape route than anything. At about sixteen I claimed Wicca, followed by paganism, but I don't think I ever truly believed in it, I would find myself thinking how much Bull their is in it. So, a month ago know, I decided to abandon all pretenses, and claimed Atheism all together. I wish I had a happier story, but there it is.