Marriage

[En_Route]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

Well, I would agree that if whatever they are doing is detracting from the professionalism or focus of their of job, that's a problem (just as it would be a problem if instead of working, they were talking really loudly on their cell phone, or haning out on HAF instead of doing their work.   )  I'm just saying that in general, I am sick of society looking down on a woman for deciding that she can do whatever she wants with her own vagina.

I don't think we differ on this. It is a form of discrimination.

[Tank]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

Well, I would agree that if whatever they are doing is detracting from the professionalism or focus of their of job, that's a problem (just as it would be a problem if instead of working, they were talking really loudly on their cell phone, or haning out on HAF instead of doing their work.   )  I'm just saying that in general, I am sick of society looking down on a woman for deciding that she can do whatever she wants with her own vagina.

well, as i should of stated, i don't care if people are open with their sexuality, or proud-- whatever. But when you are using your body and wearing tons of make up to get 'work' done, then to me, it seems tacky.

I am all for women liberation and such, but too much sexuality at work just makes me uncomfortable. there are clubs and homes for that 

i am an extremely sexual person, but i don't bring it to work. I certainly don't need my sexual to get men to do surveys with me. I do my job professionally. Which is why at the end of the day, i get the quota done the fastest and get paid the most of everyone. 

I agree with the bolded part. I would actually go on to say that makeup has no place in the workplace, but I'd temper that by saying that some people simply don't feel 'dressed' without makeup, and I wouldn't want to make people feel uncomfortable coming to work.

[DeterminedJuliet]

Re: makeup. When I was a waitress, I was told that I needed to wear more makeup. Specially, that I "should try to look attractive -- so that the men are interested, but not TOO attractive, because then the girlfriends get angry. Try really shiny lip-gloss."

And I wasn't working anywhere with any kind of sexual theme (like Hooters, or something), it was your typical mid-price family restaurant.

I didn't work there for long.  

[Dobermonster]

Re: makeup. When I was a waitress, I was told that I needed to wear more makeup. Specially, that I "should try to look attractive -- so that the men are interested, but not TOO attractive, because then the girlfriends get angry. Try really shiny lip-gloss."

And I wasn't working anywhere with any kind of sexual theme (like Hooters, or something), it was your typical mid-price family restaurant.

I didn't work there for long.  

And now it's the norm to see all the female hosts and waitresses wearing tiny, tight black dresses that shows off their bodies splendidly. Not that I really mind a bit of T&A, but it's *so* common, I'm wondering if managers are specifically requesting "sexy dress". If it becomes an expectation, that's what I have a problem with.

[Ali]

I could never make it as a waitress then.  I follow the Sarah Silverman "Make It a Treat" rule when it comes to makeup (i.e. only wear it on special occasions so people don't get used to it, and therefore it is a special treat to see you in it.)

[OldGit]

I've never worn any makeup.  I wonder if it'd suit me.

[Buddy]

I've never worn any makeup.  I wonder if it'd suit me.

If you ever decide to try it, Nyx has a few products that would suit you nicely.

[Tank]

I've never worn any makeup.  I wonder if it'd suit me.

In a darkroom I would think so.

[Asmodean]

I like makeup. Adds some complexity to the simplicity... When done properly, that is.

But then, vanity is one of my greatest virtues.

[Stevil]

I can appreciate a little eye liner (is that what it is called when they use a black pencil and thinly frame the eyes), making the eyes stand out.

Hate when they paint the skin above the eye but below the eyebrow, it looks hideous.

I prefer an unpainted face to a painted one.

But to each their own.

[Buddy]

I can appreciate a little eye liner (is that what it is called when they use a black pencil and thinly frame the eyes), making the eyes stand out.

Hate when they paint the skin above the eye but below the eyebrow, it looks hideous.

I prefer an unpainted face to a painted one.

But to each their own.

I like a little eye shadow on special occasions, but I never put on bright colors.

[DeterminedJuliet]

In bellydancing, there's a saying about makeup: "Keep putting it on until you look like a Drag Queen. Then put on a little more."  It's the only time I really like wearing a lot of makeup. It's fun.

[Velma]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

I agree that overt sexuality in the workplace can be inappropriate.

well, first i want to say i really, really wasnt saying she herself was a slut in any way. I understand i do word things very wrong sometimes. >_< i'm not sure why this happens. I apologize for my misunderstandings and don't want to stretch that subject out any further. It's  not necessary.

Well, this coworker is not a nice person. Doesn't make it right for anyone (me included) to call her names, which i don't in person or anything. To me, she is not a good person to work with though. I work in marketing , and i have to reach a quota every single day.

She is not only late for work 4/5 times a week, she tends to come in , speaking so casually about her personal life, then asking in return for information on yours. Then she'll speak of religion constantly.

Our boss is buddhist, and she is a very cool and laid back person. She NEVER brings up her religion or religious beliefs ever in the work place.

But this girl jessica will constantly go on about how god made us and how she is so grateful to be on god's earth. How we are all his children. And  i am really biting my tongue so hard not to say anything, or i will just get off and leave the area. It drives me crazy. I mean, i wish there seriously was a real against speaking religion at work. She KNOWS I'm an atheist and none of that 'i'm so proud to be god's children' doesn't apply to me, but she will still go on about it.


So that's a big peeve. She doesn't work (she is the slowest of the group) and she loves to spout religious nonsense. Her as a person drives me mad. Like, she is the type of person i would never willingly be around.

So, that's all.  

I've worked with people like that also.  It can drive you nuts.

[Sweetdeath]

Re: makeup. When I was a waitress, I was told that I needed to wear more makeup. Specially, that I "should try to look attractive -- so that the men are interested, but not TOO attractive, because then the girlfriends get angry. Try really shiny lip-gloss."

And I wasn't working anywhere with any kind of sexual theme (like Hooters, or something), it was your typical mid-price family restaurant.

I didn't work there for long.  

Yeah, fuck no. I would never work anywhere that told me to where wear makeup.


That's such thinly veiled sexism.

I dont wear make up to work.

[Sandra Craft]

I'd be interested to know what people here think of with regards to marriage?

Late to the party again.  Personally, I have no interest in marriage and never did -- I always knew that wasn't for me.  I saw good marriages and bad marriages growing up and wanted no part of any of it.  Having written that, I will admit to feeling in a little in awe of long time couples who are still affectionate with each other. 

I tend to think of marriage as a hold-over from primitive, tribal times which is constantly being tweaked to try to make it fit the modern world better.  Maybe we don't really need legal marriage anymore, but as long as it still is a legal issue I'd like to see the rules about who can and can't marry be fair and reasonable. 

So far, I haven't heard a single argument against same-sex marriage that makes a bit of sense, isn't rooted in personal religous beliefs or couldn't also be used to ban opposite-sex marriage.  The same goes for polygamous marriages.  As far as I can see, people involved in a marriage all have the same basic needs and as long as they're consenting adults it shouldn't matter to the law how many of them there are or what their sexes are.