Gift Giving....

[Simone]

Is it just me, or does this happen to anyone else? :

Okay, so every year, when it comes to the holidays, or Birthdays, does anyone else get really depressed, or anxious?

I mean, it just feels, or just reminds me of how much of a loner I am.
Each year I look for excuses to give gifts, and when it comes the time, like Christmas or something, I get all depressed because I realize, I really don't have anyone to give presents to.
And when I do give a gift to a person, such as my friend last year, I realized, that I didn't really know her as well as I thought (we've "known" each other for over 6 years) and I didn't know what to get her.

Is this weird? Or could it something to do with my bipolar disorder?

I haven't spoken about this to my psychiatrist yet, because I don't know if he'd think that I'm a total nut job....

[Squid]

It isn't weird, many people feel the same way but the BPD probably magnifies the depressive feelings for you.  You're not a nutjob anymore than anyone else is.  I've known my family my entire life and still sit here and wonder - "what the hell do they want?".

Oh, and just in case anyone gives you grief for being an atheist and exchanging gifts, that tradition predates the Christian holiday and was incorporated when the holiday was created.  It was intentionally placed on December 25th so that they could have their own celebration apart from the Winter Solstice parties.  However, people get pissed when you tell them that their "Christian holiday" was patched together from traditions from other religions and celebrations.

[Simone]

Heh, thanks, now I don't feel like a complete nutjob... Lmao

[McQ]

Simone, if it makes it any easier for you, I'd like a Nikkor telephoto lens for christmas.

How about the 400mm f2.8 IF-ED AF-SII?  Only $7,800. I'd be forever grateful, of course.

http://www.adorama.com/images/large/NK40028AF2SU.JPG

If that's not helpful enough, let me know. Of course, if you do buy it for me, I will never, ever call you a nutjob. Promise!

 

[weirdframer]

I'd settle for a bottle of wine and a hooker

[LSchune]

You have the exact opposite of my problem.  I have too many people I want to buy gifts for.  I have four family members (father, mother, sister, brother), and numerous new friends at college PLUS my old friends at home.  And then my horse friends... yeesh.

So this year I had to make a choice and just get a gift for my family members.  I have no money, so this decision is necessary.  I'm taking my entire family out to Real Seafood Company (restuarant at the Toledo docks) that'll I'll be taking the bill for.

[cantthinkofaname]

You are not alone believe me you aren't.  I never knew what to give either.  Now I give only to the children under 18 yrs old in my family and I still have trouble figuring out what to give them.   Best thing I found to do is ask the parents what they want.  When my best friend was alive I always asked her what she would like and got a list from her.  She never knew which one I would pick and sometimes just reading what she wanted gave me ideas for a different gift but in the same ballpark.

another reason I get depressed is because I see I am all alone and they are all married with children and now with grandchildren.  I told my SIS I won't ever see them again when Mom is gone not after what I have been through with them over the years.  I didn't tell her its because I feel they will treat me like shit when she is gone and treat me like I am desperate.  That depresses me even more.

[cantthinkofaname]

You are not alone believe me you aren't.  I never knew what to give either.  Now I give only to the children under 18 yrs old in my family and I still have trouble figuring out what to give them.   Best thing I found to do is ask the parents what they want.  When my best friend was alive I always asked her what she would like and got a list from her.  She never knew which one I would pick and sometimes just reading what she wanted gave me ideas for a different gift but in the same ballpark.

another reason I get depressed is because I see I am all alone and they are all married with children and now with grandchildren.  I told my SIS I won't ever see them again when Mom is gone not after what I have been through with them over the years.  I didn't tell her its because I feel they will treat me like shit when she is gone and treat me like I am desperate.  That depresses me even more.

[Gibson]

Simone, I'm in the same psychological boat with you.  BPD and the holidays are awful.  There are some aspects I should be happy with, but I experience a lot of anxiety/depression anyway.  My opinion is that there are triggers for all this, but it doesn't seem to be one thing over another.  In other words, I had relatively good things and not so good things to do and both effected me the same way.  Does that make sense?

I'm sorry you're having (or had) such a hard time.  For me, the worst is over now.  The idea of a new year is kinda depressing when I'm not doing so good, but hopefully I'll work that out before it gets here.

Feel free to PM me if you want to.

[Bella]

Who doesn't get at least stressed-out around the holidays? Don't worry... at the big one is over.   Your normal life should be returning to you shortly...