Funniest thing my parents ever said to me about science

[YoungAtheist]

My step mother said to me "God put us right where we are in the universe, the right distance to the sun so we get warmth but dont burn up, fish on a planet that had water, and plants that give us food". Of which I reply "This is where evolution comes into play, we evolved to need heat, plants evolved to need sunlight, fish evolved to be in water. You really have to learn science explains alot of things" Science is my main theory for my atheism lol. I love it

[Tank]

Mums! Bless 'um all!

[DeterminedJuliet]

To this day I still find it very strange how "God" gets credit for all of the good things in the universe, but is absolved of blame for the bad things.  ??? 

[xSilverPhinx]

Does she also think the whole universe exists just for us?

[Sweetdeath]

To this day I still find it very strange how "God" gets credit for all of the good things in the universe, but is absolved of blame for the bad things.  ??? 

Dontcha know, "god" created scientists and doctors, so all their years of hard work and ingenius contributions to help humanity? Yup, all god  

[The Magic Pudding]

I like the whole fossil fuels aren't really fossil fuels at all thing.
Fossils you know are associated with those Darwinian billions of year old earth believing liars.
There's no need to worry about resource depletion, they didn't take millions of years to develop No! God put them there and if we're all good he'll plonk some more some where.  Hopefully he won't put them in the heathen countries this time, he does work in mysterious ways.

[Tank]

I like the whole fossil fuels aren't really fossil fuels at all thing.
Fossils you know are associated with those Darwinian billions of year old earth believing liars.
There's no need to worry about resource depletion, they didn't take millions of years to develop No! God put them there and if we're all good he'll plonk some more some where.  Hopefully he won't put them in the heathen countries this time, he does work in mysterious ways.

But the heathens are right. And it's not a surprise that the oil in the USA is in Texas is it?

[Heretical Rants]

A better way of putting it, I think, is that WE are adapted to the universe, not the other way around. It's pretty egotistical to think otherwise.

[The Magic Pudding]

I like the whole fossil fuels aren't really fossil fuels at all thing.
Fossils you know are associated with those Darwinian billions of year old earth believing liars.
There's no need to worry about resource depletion, they didn't take millions of years to develop No! God put them there and if we're all good he'll plonk some more some where.  Hopefully he won't put them in the heathen countries this time, he does work in mysterious ways.

But the heathens are right. And it's not a surprise that the oil in the USA is in Texas is it?

Oil is a gift from god to the faithful.
That oil in heathen countries should rightfully be ours.
I know god would be offended by us leaving it to them.

[fester30]

Somehow my eating all my vegetables keeps those kids in Africa from starving.

[Sweetdeath]

Somehow my eating all my vegetables keeps those kids in Africa from starving.

Haha, love this. xD

[Shy]

I have an interest in astronomy. As I was talking to my God-fearing mother-in-law one day about Jupiter she said "I feel uncomfortable talking about that." Her reaction was if I asked her how my father-in-law was in the sack or something!

God in one hand, Jupiter in the other. Which weighs more? JUPITER!!!

[The Magic Pudding]

I have an interest in astronomy. As I was talking to my God-fearing mother-in-law one day about Jupiter she said "I feel uncomfortable talking about that." Her reaction was if I asked her how my father-in-law was in the sack or something!

God in one hand, Jupiter in the other. Which weighs more? JUPITER!!!

Perhaps she thinks you should go to mass.  

If this doesn't make sense blame gravity.

[Tank]

I have an interest in astronomy. As I was talking to my God-fearing mother-in-law one day about Jupiter she said "I feel uncomfortable talking about that." Her reaction was if I asked her how my father-in-law was in the sack or something!

God in one hand, Jupiter in the other. Which weighs more? JUPITER!!!

Why was she uncomfortable?

[absurdsolidarity]

I have an interest in astronomy. As I was talking to my God-fearing mother-in-law one day about Jupiter she said "I feel uncomfortable talking about that." Her reaction was if I asked her how my father-in-law was in the sack or something!

God in one hand, Jupiter in the other. Which weighs more? JUPITER!!!

Why was she uncomfortable?

I'm going to venture a guess that it is because she knows astronomy is a science and thus has scientific explanations for things that she personally is not aware of.  The fear of natural reasons to things she doesn't understand is probably part of her reason for believing in God in a first place.  Belief in God saves her from existential crisis, and if she started talking about science then she'd be vulnerable to psychological desires that create the void she currently uses God to fill.