New to atheism

[thedport]

Well, I am 22 and have been agnostic for about the last ten years. I know I say I am new and thats true because only recently, say in the last month, I have finally said f-it I really don't believe there is a god. Well all of my friends know, in fact one of my best friends came out of the proverbial atheist closet with me. My family doesn't know, mainly because I am not sure how they would handle it. My father is an out of work minister and my mother has no belief in the science she has ever been taught and thinks people who beleive in evolution over the creation story are just stupid. I have been looking for someplace that I can discuss my views without being worried about being called evil or shunned. I am looking forward to meeting lot's of people here.

[Cooper20]

Welcome!

I too, am afraid of spilling the beans to my parents about be lack of Belief.

Nice place around here.

[The Black Jester]

Welcome!

[Crow]

Hi thedport, Welcome.

Have you ever discussed with your parents about lack of faith in general? You may be able to open up a dialogue on the subject that can make them see it is not evil or idiotic without necessary laying all your cards out on the table, eventually allowing you to be open with them.

[thedport]

I have tried, the funny thing is that my father is the more understanding one. In fact he is one of the biggest influences of me turning to atheism, not because he did anything wrong but because he encouraged me to think for my self. I just don't think he expected me to become atheist. And I love and respect my father he has helped me through a lot. And I have told him, because we do debate about politics and world views, that our views will never be exactly the same, and he respects that. My parents don't berate me about not going to church which is nice, up to this point I haven't had to really say look I don't believe anymore. On holidays that involve church I usually have to work anyways and it's the norm. So really I just want some others besides my one friend here that I can discuss humanist views and have courteous conversations on philosophy and  theology, from a rational and intelligent point of view. Thank you for all the welcomes.

[xSilverPhinx]

Welcome!

Does your family still think that you're a believer or suspect that you're an agnostic?

[Maria]

Hello thedport.

Welcome to HAF. I would hate to live in an environment in which 'coming out' as an atheist is such a traumatic event. Your story is all too familiar on these forums. I hope all goes well for you.

Maria.

[Tank]

Hi Thedport

Welcome to HAF!

Regards
Chris

[Melmoth]

Welcome. You'll have such a place here.

[thedport]

Welcome!

Does your family still think that you're a believer or suspect that you're an agnostic?


[/qoute]

As far as I can tell they realize I do not agree with the contemporary idea of christian religion, but I am pretty sure that they think I still beleive the whole Jesus as lord and savoir blah blah blah. And I respect and love both my parents very much, because well they are my parents and without them I wouldn't have been born, and I love the fact that I was born it's awesome. I guesse the biggest reason I don't come right out and throw it in their face that I thnk their beleifs are archaic and belong where small pox are, one sample left only for testing in a quarentined lab, and the rest of the world given a vaccine to better their lives, is because of that respect. I don't know, I realize that it sounds like I am making excuses but I haven't lied about how I feel. When asked about different things I told them my stance, which almost always differs from theirs. But they have not flat out asked me, do you still beleive in god. I am dreading that convo, because I am not going to lie, and that may end up being the problem.

[The Black Jester]

May you find comfort, in whatever variety, here.

[Stevil]

So, you are struggling to find a g-friend that is comfortable with you being an Atheist (I note, you stated this on another thread).
Might I suggest that Church socials are not the best function for an Atheist to be looking for a potential partner.

You don't happen to live in the bible belt do you?

If Atheists are the vast minority then potentialy you could join a club that Christians are not comfortable with. That way you might be more likely to meet non Christians and hence have a chance with the ladies 

[Cecilie]

Hi there. Welcome to HAF.

[Whitney]

 i never made a point of coming out to my family...it just came up over time as a result of my not hiding it (though I was already out of the house and almost married by the time it first started to really surface)

To give you an idea of what you might face:

My dad was surprised (i use to be really into church) but not upset.  His background is that he was raised baptist and is a seminary drop out in favor of law school.

My sister doesn't care as long as we don't push our views on each other (this works out
great and we can still talk about our differences on the odd occasion that it does come up)

My mom...well, she thought I was in a cult (yes, seriously, sister told me and apparently corrected the thought) because of the freethought group I'm involved with; but she still loves me even if she thinks I'm lost.

[Asmodean]

Welcome!

Don't worry about being called evil around here too much - that label is pretty much mine to carry with pride 

Even though I do not know your family, I think you should tell them that you are an atheist. Some things are about YOU, not them and pretending to be something you are not around some people and not others tends not to be too good for health... Just an opinion...