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Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.

Started by Tank, December 19, 2015, 11:49:35 AM

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Guardian85

#195
March 29, 2016, 02:01:28 PM


"If scientist means 'not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,' I guess I'm a scientist, then."
-Unknown Smartass-

Biggus Dickus

#196
March 30, 2016, 03:43:24 AM
It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.
"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

Claireliontamer

#197
April 01, 2016, 08:42:59 PM
Never marry a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.

Biggus Dickus

#198
April 02, 2016, 03:14:27 PM
^^Love that one Claire...

"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

joeactor

#199
April 04, 2016, 02:15:53 PM
A couple more from my friend Ben:

I was counting my quartz and amethyst, and I got arrested. That's what I get for doing crystal math.

They said the new statue was made of marble, but I just took it for granite.

A cell said to his sister, "Part of me is breaking off." "What part?" He replied. "It's my toe, sis!"

joeactor

#200
April 06, 2016, 04:31:42 PM

Biggus Dickus

#201
April 17, 2016, 05:37:01 AM
I think Joe should have been banned for the one above^^ ;D



"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

Tank

#202
April 17, 2016, 08:01:23 AM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

xSilverPhinx

#203
April 17, 2016, 01:37:54 PM
^ Argh! :bleh:
I am what survives if it's slain - Zack Hemsey

Tank

#204
April 17, 2016, 05:17:34 PM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Tank

#205
April 18, 2016, 08:12:15 AM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Bad Penny II

#206
April 19, 2016, 03:18:37 PM
If you need someone to kill
I'm a man without a will
Take my advice, don't listen to me.

MariaEvri

#207
April 19, 2016, 04:22:51 PM
Quote from: Tank on April 17, 2016, 08:01:23 AM


ok I find this extremely cute!
God made me an atheist, who are you to question his wisdom!
www.poseidonsimons.com

Magdalena

#208
April 20, 2016, 03:43:42 AM

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Biggus Dickus

#209
April 23, 2016, 05:02:23 PM




"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."
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