Asmology | Split From Pledge of Allegiance Thread

[Asmodean]

"Render therefore unto Asmo the things which are Asmo's"

Stolen. Added to The Book(tm).

[AnimatedDirt]

"Render therefore unto Asmo the things which are Asmo's"

Stolen. Added to The Book(tm).

You can have all my clay.  You pay for shipping.

[Asmodean]

"Render therefore unto Asmo the things which are Asmo's"

Stolen. Added to The Book(tm).

You can have all my clay.  You pay for shipping.

Ah, but you see, most roads and airport runways cross a patch of clay here and there, making them The Asmo's. So shipping, it be free, yes? 

[AnimatedDirt]

Ah, but you see, most roads and airport runways cross a patch of clay here and there, making them The Asmo's. So shipping, it be free, yes? 

Are you asking or declaring?

[Asmodean]

Asmos don't ask. They proclaim. 

[AnimatedDirt]

Asmos don't ask. They proclaim.  

Infallible the Asmo(s) is not.

Ah, but you see, most roads and airport runways cross a patch of clay here and there, making them The Asmo's. So shipping, it be free, yes?  

This proclamation seems to end in a mark of question and/or uncertainty.

[Asmodean]

Infallible the Asmo(s) is not.

...But even their flaws are perfect. Says so in The Book(tm)

This proclamation seems to end in a mark of question and/or uncertainty.

Combined sentence. Everything before the last comma is a statement. Everything after is a confirmation call. For instance, "The sky is blue, yes?" in this context means that according to me, the sky is blue, but I invite opposing views.

[Ali]

Infallible the Asmo(s) is not.

...But even their flaws are perfect. Says so in The Book(tm)

This proclamation seems to end in a mark of question and/or uncertainty.

Combined sentence. Everything before the last comma is a statement. Everything after is a confirmation call. For instance, "The sky is blue, yes?" in this context means that according to me, the sky is blue, but I invite opposing views.

I always thought that Asmo was a sort of "my way or the highway" type god.  No?

[Asmodean]

Not at all. The Asmo just has a knack of turning highways into his ways, but in order to do so, he must be presented with a highway to dismantle and re-make in His gray image.  

...There IS a difference. The Asmo proclaims it so.

[AnimatedDirt]

Infallible the Asmo(s) is not.

...But even their flaws are perfect. Says so in The Book(tm)

This proclamation seems to end in a mark of question and/or uncertainty.

Combined sentence. Everything before the last comma is a statement. Everything after is a confirmation call. For instance, "The sky is blue, yes?" in this context means that according to me, the sky is blue, but I invite opposing views.

So then shipping is only free on those roads or runways that cross paths over clay...therefore shipping is not always free.

[Asmodean]

So then shipping is only free on those roads or runways that cross paths over clay...therefore shipping is not always free.

Ah, but there is fine print, you see:

If something lays against the clay
Or against that, which down the line
Gain contact with His Grayness may
It's Asmo's 'til the end of time

So you see, if it touches clay or something which touches clay or something which touches something which touches clay and so on and so on, The Asmo layeth rightful claim to it. According to The Book(tm).

[Ali]

So then shipping is only free on those roads or runways that cross paths over clay...therefore shipping is not always free.

Ah, but there is fine print, you see:

If something lays against the clay
Or against that, which down the line
Gain contact with His Grayness may
It's Asmo's 'til the end of time

So you see, if it touches clay or something which touches clay or something which touches something which touches clay and so on and so on, The Asmo layeth rightful claim to it. According to The Book(tm).

*Stares at the ceramic coffee mug in her hand accusingly*

[Asmodean]

That which is within the ceramic mug. The Asmo demands it be sacrificed by devouring in His honor. 

[AnimatedDirt]

So you see, if it touches clay or something which touches clay or something which touches something which touches clay and so on and so on, The Asmo layeth rightful claim to it. According to The Book(tm).

Technically, there is space between everything that "touches" and therefore nothing actually touches anything as space is just space.  A void.

Therefore shipping cannot be free as the Asmo(s) proclaims it to be...therefore Asmo(s) proclamation is useless and Asmo(s) cannot be god.

[Ali]

That which is within the ceramic mug. The Asmo demands it be sacrificed by devouring in His honor. 

Done.  I drank that hot tea in honor of the Great and Terrible Asmo.  I drank it so well, it will stay drunk.