Your best practical joke

[Guardian85]

Simply, what is the best practical joke you have performed, or had performed on you?

I'll start.
When I was in the service we played a joke on our squad leader. While he was in the shower we "liberated" all his clothes and his towel, and then procceded to lock all the doors in the building, essentially locking him in the hallways. This was easy considering I was the watch soldier that evening and had the keys to pretty much everything.

When he got out of the shower, he was understandably perplexed about the absence of his uniform and towel, and downright distressed when all the doors were locked. So he was running up and down the hallway trying to find anything to cover himself up with. That is when things kinda escalated.

The officer of the watch that evening was a female Ensign, who chose that particular moment to check that we wren't up to anything, which obviously we were.
When he ran into her his training kicked in, and rather then covering himself up he snapped to attention. She looked him over, looked again and dismissed him. Luckily she had a sense of humor, and laughed as hard about it as any of us.

[Tank]

LOL!

I have a simple set of rules when it comes to practical jokes.
1) No injury (except psychological)
2) No expense to the victim.
3) Don't do it to somebody else if you wouldn't have it done to you!

So. Get 10/12 condoms. A kilo of dry ice. Hammer and gloves. Victims car.

Gain access to the car. Open one window 20mm. Break up the dry ice into small pieces. Drop bits into condom. Tie condom and quickly pop through the open window. Repeat for all condoms.

The dry ice evaporates an blows up the condoms, if distributed correctly they completely fill the car.

The victim arrives to find their car full of inflated condoms.
They open a door.
1) Door flies open!
2) The condoms all explode coating all the surfaces they were in contact with with a thin film of lubricant!

Done this a couple of times at a weddings 

[hismikeness]

In college, while playing football, during fall camp we were required to stay in the dorms as a team for three weeks. The new freshmen would always be on the upper floors, with a roommate. Seniors got their own rooms on the first floor. Anyway, in the summer the elevators were turned off, so all the freshman had to walk up several flights of stairs to get to their rooms. We upperclassmen figured out (mostly by having it done to us as freshmen) that if you stick a quarter or other coin in between the door and the jamb, it put so much pressure on the lock mechanism that the door knob won't turn, effectively locking the freshman in their room. Then, we'd go in to the adjacent rooms with water guns and wait near the windows. The dorms we stayed in had big awnings that hung out over the windows, and you could easily climb out the window the next room- but you were going to get blasted with a water gun on the way.

It was tame hazing compared to some of the hazing rituals I've heard of.

[Ali]

A coworker and I were very bored during a slow period at work, so we decided to play with another coworker's desk.  Basically, we took every item on his desk and labeled it with sticky notes.  Mouse was labeled "mouse", phone was labeled "phone" and so on.  The really tricky part was labeling each file as "file" and then each piece of paper within the file as "paper" and cutting up sticky notes small enough to label each key on his keyboard, and so on.  Took us a whole afternoon, but it was a work of art once it was finished, and was the gift that kept on giving as he continued to find sticky notes tucked in files and books and whatnot for weeks afterwards.

[Guardian85]

Knew there were some good stories to be told.

Ali, that was hilarious! 

[Ali]

Yours was too! I love the part about the naked man snapping to attention and being dismissed.   

[Crow]

I would have loved this prank to have happened to one of my friends.

[Tank]

I had a boss who used to be a right pain in the arse (aren't they all?). He used to leave post-it notes on work he wanted to discuss with you. But the note just said "See Me" with his signature. So you'd try and see him and it was always the most trivial shite as he was a pedantic twat. He dished out so many of these little notes he would forget who he'd given them to. So I simply started taking the notes off of my work and sticking them on other peoples work. Of course this would lead to the win:win situation when the person rang the boss, because the boss wouldn't know what it was about. But he (the boss) wouldn't dare admit he was wrong so he'd make something up about the work the other person had done!  

@Ali I don't suppose you took a photo did you?

[Asmodean]

LOL!

I have a simple set of rules when it comes to practical jokes.
1) No injury (except psychological)
2) No expense to the victim.
3) Don't do it to somebody else if you wouldn't have it done to you!

So. Get 10/12 condoms. A kilo of dry ice. Hammer and gloves. Victims car.

Gain access to the car. Open one window 20mm. Break up the dry ice into small pieces. Drop bits into condom. Tie condom and quickly pop through the open window. Repeat for all condoms.

The dry ice evaporates an blows up the condoms, if distributed correctly they completely fill the car.

The victim arrives to find their car full of inflated condoms.
They open a door.
1) Door flies open!
2) The condoms all explode coating all the surfaces they were in contact with with a thin film of lubricant!

Done this a couple of times at a weddings 

It is a good one, this joke is. However, you have to watch out for Asmos. If an Asmo goes to his ar, finds it full of condoms, openes the door and gets lube everywhere, he will take the car to a professional cleaner and send the 1700 kroner bill to the joker.

No expense to the "victim", who finally gets the stench of cigarettes out of his car interior and a lot of expense for the joker.

[Tom62]

Most fun that I ever had was when I replaced a coworker's Windows desktop with a screenshot of his desktop. You should have seen his face when he tried to double click on the shortcuts.

[Asmodean]

Most fun that I ever had was when I replaced a coworker's Windows desktop with a screenshot of his desktop. You should have seen his face when he tried to double click on the shortcuts.

Ooh! This, I like. The Asmo would, of course, suspect tampering from the start, but he's overly paranoid like that.

It is, however, something to be attempted. 

[OldGit]

One of the best ones I ever heard of was alleged to have happened in Cambridge 50 years ago.

A joker noticed that some workmen were digging up the road.  He phoned the police, telling them that a gang of students dressed as workmen were digging up the road for a prank.  He then phoned the local Council and warned them that a gang of students dressed as policemen were coming to interfere with their workmen.

[Ali]

One of the best ones I ever heard of was alleged to have happened in Cambridge 50 years ago.

A joker noticed that some workmen were digging up the road.  He phoned the police, telling them that a gang of students dressed as workmen were digging up the road for a prank.  He then phoned the local Council and warned them that a gang of students dressed as policemen were coming to interfere with their workmen.

That's hysterical.

Tank:  We did take pictures at the time and emailed them out to people who missed the prank.  When I go back to work on Monday I'll look to see if I still have them on my work computer.

[Tank]

Most fun that I ever had was when I replaced a coworker's Windows desktop with a screenshot of his desktop. You should have seen his face when he tried to double click on the shortcuts.

Very good! I'll have to remember this one!

Many years ago computer mice worked with a little rubber coated steel ball. It could get dirty so it could be taken out. Of course while it was out the 'mouse' would not work.

I've got in early to work so just for a giggle I take the ball out of the sectary's mouse. She comes in and fires up her computer and of course it doesn't work. Pissed off she asks me if I can help. I go over and confirm the mouse isn't working and I don't know why. She'll have to get a new one. So she calls tech' support and requests a new mouse. Now tech' support was populated by a bunch of MSPs. They agree to bring over a new mouse. Secretary goes to 'powder her nose'. I replace the ball in the mouse, it works perfectly. Tech' support guy arrives (he's well known for thinking that if you don't have a penis you can't use a computer) and simply moves the mouse around and it works. HUGE argument breaks out about 'stupid women' and 'sexist bastards' and 'dumb broads'.  


I never owned up to that one!

[Tank]

One of the best ones I ever heard of was alleged to have happened in Cambridge 50 years ago.

A joker noticed that some workmen were digging up the road.  He phoned the police, telling them that a gang of students dressed as workmen were digging up the road for a prank.  He then phoned the local Council and warned them that a gang of students dressed as policemen were coming to interfere with their workmen.

That's hysterical.

Tank:  We did take pictures at the time and emailed them out to people who missed the prank.  When I go back to work on Monday I'll look to see if I still have them on my work computer.

Excellent!