Why aren't there athiest churches?

[Thumpalumpacus]

There's certainly no need to call the things churches if we don't want to.  We can call them whatever we want, like, say, feelgood assemblies.  

I prefer the term "university", because to me learning is the only worthy homage we can -- and ought -- to pay to a blind universe.

[LegendarySandwich]

EDIT: Sweet! I'm now a legally ordained minister at The First Church of Atheism.

Wow, talk about unexpected e-mails:

Hi Christopher,

I don't typically email our ministers, but I just couldn't help it this time. When I processed your ordination I noticed your email address, and have been thinking about it for the past week. Turning over the possibilities of what exactly the "legendary sandwich" would be comprised of. I'm sure this is largely because I'm pregnant, and all I think about is food. I'm also a huge sandwich nut. Anyway, if you could share with me some info about this legendary sandwich I would be most grateful!

Thanks!
Jacki McMaster
Founder, FCA

Any suggestions on what to say? Traditionally, the LegendarySandwich has been an item of legend; if eaten, one would gain superpowers for twenty-four hours, until it respawned.

[Croaker]

[The Magic Pudding]

Everything you've ever wanted.
Things you didn't know you wanted.
Shame it's a mere sandwich though.

[Thumpalumpacus]

She's pregnant?  Tell her it's pastrami and fudge on black rye, with clover sprouts, mustard, and pomegranate seed.