Atheism vs. Cancer

[Sheeplauncher]

Hey there i have been thinking about an interesting dilemma i am currently facing. My mom was recently diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer in its early stages which is good. Now i am an atheist and want nothing to do with organized religion and my family knows my beliefs but we never really clashed on it. My family hasn't been going to church for awhile even though they are semi-religious. Now that my mom is about to undergo surgery she wants to go back to church and return to god. I told them i did not want them to force religion on me. My dad said its not about you, its about your mom and you should go out of respect for her. Now i really dislike organized religion but am at a crossroads here. I really don't know whether i should go out of respect or stick to my beliefs. Anyone have thoughts?

[Heretical Rants]

You shouldn't have to go to church for anyone but yourself--I'm sure there are other ways you can support your mother if you really don't want to go.

its not about you

... The thing is, it IS about you.  It is your life, not theirs.

[Whitney]

I think your dad may have meant that they aren't going to church to make you believe or go but because it will make your mom happy.  I don't see a problem with attending if that makes your mom feel better.  However, you shouldn't have to go through the motions if you don't want to...there is a difference between physically going and participating.  I don't think your family should ask you to pretend to be something you are not nor do I see how you doing so could possibly make your mom feel better.

[PipeBox]

Ask them as respectfully as possible why your being at church will make your mom happier.  If it's spending time with her she wants, offer to spend more time with her elsewhere.  If they seem to think your unbelieving, non-praying, indifferent presence at the church will score them bonus points with the heavens, point out that it should not.  Why would her god require your presence for anything (or, in much more offensive terms, to give you the gist, is this god so petty he won't take care of her perfectly well without your presence)?  If it isn't about spending time with you or Miracle Points, then it's about getting you into (or back into) the religion, and you should decline, even with mild contempt, as it would indicate a lack of acceptance and because your parents would have been lying: it would have been all about you.

[JillSwift]

Don't go out of respect for religion - nothing there to respect. Don't go out of a sense of obligation - that just makes people bitter.

But, if you care about your mom, you'll regret it later if you don't support her.

Go, and during the services hold your mom's hand, or put your arm around her shoulders, or just occasionally touch her arm - whatever you feel gets the point across. Yo don't have to go through the motions of the service, so long as you're not "in the way". You're there because you care about someone, that's all that matters.

If your mom or dad later comment on your non-interaction, raise an eyebrow and clearly say something like "I don't believe, finger-wagging and brow-beating never converted anyone. I go because I love mom." This is inarguable, and it puts you firmly on the moral high-ground.

[Whitney]

If your mom or dad later comment on your non-interaction, raise an eyebrow and clearly say something like "I don't believe, finger-wagging and brow-beating never converted anyone. I go because I love mom." This is inarguable, and it puts you firmly on the moral high-ground.

^Great advice.

[Sheeplauncher]

Thanks for all the advice guys. It was actually really helpful

Damn iphone auto edits