The "Once upon a time..." thread.

[En_Route]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal

[Ali]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind.

[En_Route]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind.

That puts beyond doubt that this is a work of pure fiction.

[DeterminedJuliet]

Hahahaha!

[Ali]

 

[Tom62]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind. However

[En_Route]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind. However harpsichords

[The Black Jester]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind. However harpsichords hammered

[En_Route]

Once I drove back to the decrepit remains of my grandmother's hamster themed wedding, urine gushing noisily, of course, because vaginas aren't watertight. There's Jasmine scented tea steeping with onions borrowed from Aunt Brunhilde, and poo-stained sheets in striking puse.  I frantically abused turtles by setting my power-drill on low before spinning into counter-clockwise rotational overdrive.  Antelopes beneath me; licorice above me; ormolus' buttons were pressed tentatively to release the hounds. Velveteen Rabbits came upon a mouldering skeleton clutching a penis-shaped pinata. "Surprise!"

"Holy Guacamole, Senor!" I mimed.  Sparkles, my dog, grinned wolfishly and hummed a dirge as the rabbits cavorted enticingly. Nymphets jostled insinuatingly around my butt crack, as usual.  Sadly they didn't forgo their scatological ruminations until gunshots sounded lovely.

Slithering against time bombs, I cocked back, aimed, and dribbled jam over my basque peoples of unknown origin. They screamed, understandably, as Newgod forgot to lock little fartleberries. Presumptuous cretins! Gargantuan midgets skipped into parliament dressed to the nines.  Sultry monkeys violated my virginal mind. However harpsichords hammered  horrisonantly

[The Black Jester]

horrisonantly

?

[En_Route]

=cacophonously

Not that comprehensibility is really much of an issue in this context.

[The Black Jester]

=cacophonously

Not that comprehensibility is really much of an issue in this context.

Ah!  Thank you for indulging me.  My brief search was unable to find a reference.  I should have kept looking...I love learning new words.

[Ali]

horrisonantly

?

Horrisonantly:

1. Virtually never used adverbial inflection of the rarely used adjective horrisonant.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/horrisonantly


Well that clears it right up.  

horrisonant:

1. Horrisonous.[Websters]
2. Virtually never used base adjective of the rarely used adverb horrisonantly.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/horrisonant



Horrisonous:

1. Sounding dreadfully; uttering a terrible sound.[Websters]
2. Being hoarse. [Eve - graph theoretic]
3. Being coarse, harsh, rough or gruff. [Eve - graph theoretic]
4. Being sepulchral. [Eve - graph theoretic]
5. Being hollow. [Eve - graph theoretic]
6. Rarely used base adjective of the adverb horrisonously.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/Horrisonous

ALL THAT FOR "HOARSELY"?!?

[The Black Jester]

I was unable to find that reference in Merriam-Webster's "unabridged" dictionary, which means, of course that said dictionary isn't...

[En_Route]

horrisonantly

?

Horrisonantly:

1. Virtually never used adverbial inflection of the rarely used adjective horrisonant.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/horrisonantly


Well that clears it right up.  

horrisonant:

1. Horrisonous.[Websters]
2. Virtually never used base adjective of the rarely used adverb horrisonantly.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/horrisonant



Horrisonous:

1. Sounding dreadfully; uttering a terrible sound.[Websters]
2. Being hoarse. [Eve - graph theoretic]
3. Being coarse, harsh, rough or gruff. [Eve - graph theoretic]
4. Being sepulchral. [Eve - graph theoretic]
5. Being hollow. [Eve - graph theoretic]
6. Rarely used base adjective of the adverb horrisonously.

http://www.websters-online-dictionary.org/definitions/Horrisonous

ALL THAT FOR "HOARSELY"?!?

Hoarsely doesn't do it. As the word itself suggests " horrible- sounding" is pretty close. But less erudite. And here at HAF we have exacting literary standards to maintain.