Jokes Thread (Was named Anyone know any good jokes ? I'll start :D )

[Kody]

^^^ Excellent! 

[Pasta Chick]

[Essie Mae]

You've convinced me!

[Asmodean]

Yes, but what about the extinct marine life and amphibians? Liopleurodons and the like?

[Pasta Chick]

Yes, but what about the extinct marine life and amphibians? Liopleurodons and the like?

Aquatic life requires specific temperatures and salinity.  If there actually was enough rainfall to cover all land and cause the oceans the merge, it's likely nothing would survive. 

Amphibians mostly breathe air and need to get out of the water occasionally, so I doubt they'd fare well either.  Maybe some hardy frogs and turtles may pull through if there were enough floatsum.

[Asmodean]

Do you really think Liopleurodons and their ilk required temperature and salinity more specific than the ancient sharks and whatever the ancestor of cod was?

[Pasta Chick]

They were on the ark.  Duh.

[Magdalena]

Asmo and Pasta Chick, I'm sorry to butt in on your debate, but both of you haven't noticed something.

Pasta Chick: I see the Liopleurodons and their ilk swimming in the ocean, so they are not on the ark.  
Asmo: The Liopleurodons and their ilk swimming around are about to die because I see one stick of dynamite near them.  

...It could be TNT because, although not quite as powerful as dynamite (and harder to detonate), the main benefit of TNT is that it's even more stable than dynamite. Also, TNT can be melted down and poured into shell casings. On the downside, however, TNT is extremely toxic.

"The downside, however, TNT is extremely toxic!?" For Noah, this was an advantage, he knew TNT would be something extremely toxic for Marine life. The poor Liopleurodons and their ilk were dealing with one smart son of a bitch.  

Now the question is what type of missile did he use? The bones were not destroyed in the explosion, how do you explain that?  

[Niya]

Hahahaha, I literally spit out my drink.

[Pasta Chick]

Asmo and Pasta Chick, I'm sorry to butt in on your debate, but both of you haven't noticed something.

Pasta Chick: I see the Liopleurodons and their ilk swimming in the ocean, so they are not on the ark.  

No, the shark and cod anscestors were in Noah's ark.  The dinosaurs obviously did not build a big enough ark and the Leoploridons could not fit.  They're getting TNT'd or dying with the rest of the sea life from inappropriate aquatic conditions.

Now the question is what type of missile did he use? The bones were not destroyed in the explosion, how do you explain that?  

They must have come from other areas.  There were only 2 arks, so the battle would have been relatively small and not terribly destructive.  We need to look for an area of mostly vaporized dinosaur fossils to prove this Biblical truth. 

[OldGit]

I'm just a silly old codger, but I must admit I thought it was just a joke. 

[Pasta Chick]

Blasphemy!  Raptor Jesus went extinct for your sins!  Repent!

[Asmodean]

The ancient Asmos survived very well, thank you very much, but His Infernal Grayness is not above admitting that that whole "Flood Luxembourg with a flood"-scheme went... Well, slightly, a tiny-wee-incy bit... Sort of out of control... Just a little. Yes, that's what it was.  

[Pasta Chick]

Clay is known for doing well in riverbeds and the like.

[Ecurb Noselrub]

You've convinced me!

Actually, according to string theory, there were multiple arks, all tied together with a string.  Some of them were submarine arks, which held the various forms of ancient marine life.  Noah destroyed them with depth charges, along with all the other arks that he destroyed with his cannon.  The picture only shows the very end of the destruction.