News:

Actually sport it is a narrative

Main Menu

What if 2020 refuses to leave?

Started by Ecurb Noselrub, December 21, 2020, 08:53:11 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Ecurb Noselrub

Reports are coming from the Sun that 2020 is threatening to stay on for another term. This would require that Earth stop orbiting for another year, but there is apparently nothing in the Constitution that would prevent this. 2020 has already reached out to Jupiter and Saturn to exert more gravitational force and hold Earth in its place, and they are having a very close meeting right now to discuss the proposal. The Sun is perplexed, as it has never faced this situation in its 4.603 billion years.  It has convened a counsel of its closest advisors - Mercury and Venus - but no one is sure what to do. 2021 is waiting its turn just a few million miles away, but 2020, in typical fashion, has told it to fuck off. The outer planets are fine with the proposal, as they never liked those warmer planets anyway and would like to screw them up any way possible. In a recent tweet, 2020 said "The Laws of Nature are Rigged!! Not Fair! Fight for another term!"

The Moon and Mars have not stated their positions yet, but the Asteroid Belt is said to be passing out 2020 flags, sporting the logo "Make the Solar System Great Again".  They plan threatening flybys for any 2021 supporters.

Reported by The Solar Times.   

No one


Ecurb Noselrub

Quote from: No one on December 21, 2020, 09:08:47 PM
Did you pull this out of Uranus?

Yes, with a bit of help from from a full Moon and Neptune's trident. 

Magdalena


"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

billy rubin

you know, mags, th eproblem is going to be that the day after the last day of 2020 will be the day 2021 begins full of unfinished business.


set the function, not the mechanism.

Magdalena

Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on December 21, 2020, 09:13:20 PM
Quote from: No one on December 21, 2020, 09:08:47 PM
Did you pull this out of Uranus?

Yes, with a bit of help from from a full Moon and Neptune's trident.
OK...That's not a pretty picture.

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Magdalena

Quote from: billy rubin on December 22, 2020, 01:41:24 AM
you know, mags, th eproblem is going to be that the day after the last day of 2020 will be the day 2021 begins full of unfinished business.
Yes, many of them.

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

xSilverPhinx

Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on December 21, 2020, 08:53:11 PM
What if 2020 refuses to leave?

Bring out the straightjacket because this year was fricken' crazy!

I am what survives if it's slain - Zack Hemsey


Bad Penny II

For me 2020 has been OK.
The companies I count the beans for are doing well.
I haven't missed a day of work.
I very rarely do restaurants, gyms never.
I never ran out of toilet paper.
Take my advice, don't listen to me.

Randy

Not much changes in my life these days but for some reason 2020 is just plain depressing. I'll be glad to see it go and if it doesn't I'll use a cattle prod and force it out the door.
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg