Odd Sins!

[Will]

This thread, inspired by the God/Viagra thread, is about using biblical quotes to propose absurd directives from God. I'll begin:

Clean your room when your mother asks or GO TO HELL:
"For everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him." (Leviticus 20:9)

Have a beard or GO TO HELL:
"Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard." (Leviticus 19:27)

If you go swimming, you GO TO HELL:
"Whatever in the water does not have fins or scales; that shall be an abomination to you." (Leviticus 11:12)

If you don't use chapstick, you're going to get BEATEN IN THE MOUTH:
"A man's lips bring him strife, and his mouth invites a beating." (Porverbs 18:6)

[Asmodean]

If you don't eat fish and chicken after sex, you will GO TO HELL:

and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and  multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over  the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living  thing that moveth upon the earth."

-Genesis 1:28

[joeactor]

Let's not forget the real tenth commandment:
"Thou shalt not seethe a kid in his mother's milk."
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=2&chapter=34&version=9

YMMV,
JoeActor

[Smallville]

Have a child and don't make a "sin offering"  you GO TO HELL!

Leviticus 12:6-8
12:6  And when the days of her purifying are fulfilled, for a son, or for a daughter, she shall bring a lamb of the first year for a burnt offering, and a young pigeon, or dove, for a sin offering, unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation, unto the priest:     
12:7 Who shall offer it before the LORD, and make an atonement for her; and she shall be cleansed from the issue of her blood. This is the law for her that hath born a male or a female.
12:8 And if she be not able to bring a lamb, then she shall bring two turtles, or two young pigeons; the one for the burnt offering, and the other for a sin offering: and the priest shall make an atonement for her, and she shall be clean.

[afreethinker30]

This thread, inspired by the God/Viagra thread, is about using biblical quotes to propose absurd directives from God. I'll begin:

Clean your room when your mother asks or GO TO HELL:
"For everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him." (Leviticus 20:9)

Have a beard or GO TO HELL:
"Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard." (Leviticus 19:27)

If you go swimming, you GO TO HELL:
"Whatever in the water does not have fins or scales; that shall be an abomination to you." (Leviticus 11:12)

If you don't use chapstick, you're going to get BEATEN IN THE MOUTH:
"A man's lips bring him strife, and his mouth invites a beating." (Porverbs 18:6)

No wonder religious folks are so confused.With being told that crap I would be to.I wonder who thinks up these things?

[SteveS]

I know it has been posted here before, but if any of you haven't seen it there's a great site where somebody illustrated, using Lego bricks, all the foolish sins like this.  The site is at: http://www.thebricktestament.com/

[afreethinker30]

I know it has been posted here before, but if any of you haven't seen it there's a great site where somebody illustrated, using Lego bricks, all the foolish sins like this.  The site is at: http://www.thebricktestament.com/

Great site.All the time it took to do that.

[afreethinker30]

Is Breastfeeding a Gateway Sin?
FREEHOLD, IOWA - Church authorities were prompted to make a public statement against breastfeeding last Tuesday when it was found that a number of church ladies had been breastfeeding their children well into adulthood. "Little Randy is nearly 15-years old now," said church mother, Ida Jenkins. "I still breastfeed the boy because I read in some secular magazine somewhere that the nutritional benefits of breastfeeding never really end." It was found that Mrs. Jenkins was nourishing young Randy 'round the clock by draining her teat into sippy cup and packing it in his Veggie Tales lunchbox. "The youngster was sharing it with other students," said Landover Baptist Junior High School Principal, Gil Higglesworth. "I got suspicious after taking a sip of it myself." "What needs to happen here, is to just do away with breastfeeding altogether," said Pastor Deacon Fred. "Poor young Christian boys are being weaned into oral gratification from infancy and the whole thing just stinks like the devil's hiney. "Our Baptist community comes from the school of thought that when a young boy starts to get hair under his arms that is the sign from God that he is becoming a man and it is time to stop nursing." Pastor Deacon Fred explained that those days are long past, and the time has come to end breastfeeding altogether.

The one thing I agree with is there should be a limit on how long you breastfeed a child. "Little Randy is nearly 15-years old now,"  Now that's just creepy!

http://disbeliefnet.com/article.php?page=landover_breastfeeding