Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.

[Buddy]

Yes, well... He shalt SMITE the blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, THEN we'll see. 

Yes, THEN we'll see, but right now, we have two: The Grayly-Divine Grumpy Lumpy one, and The Blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, (AKA Goddess of chaos.) I do want coffee and doughnuts, but I also want--what is it that The Asmo provides? I forgot. 

I'll have you know my eyebrows are a thing of beauty. 

[Guardian85]

I'll have you know my eyebrows are a thing of beauty. 

Having had them incredoulusly raised in my general direction I have to agree with the godess on this one.

[Biggus Dickus]

More latin puns:

Locative Party: It's Where it's At

[Buddy]

I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory, all I did was take a day off.

[Asmodean]

I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory, all I did was take a day off.

Yes, well... Thou who usurpest and whatnot. 

Actually, we do compensate for the Earth's rotation not being quite in sync with the calendar, do we not? Damn, I'm getting old. :-(

[Buddy]

 The first time I used an elevator it was really uplifting, then it let me down.

[Biggus Dickus]

[Guardian85]

Stealing someone's coffee is called a mugging.

[Biggus Dickus]

My niece had a new teacher today, said she cat understand her.

[Davin]

She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.



_{That one may be the most painful.}

[Guardian85]

There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided.
At last report, the survivors were marooned.

[Biggus Dickus]

She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


_{That one may be the most painful.}

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.

[Davin]

She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


_{That one may be the most painful.}

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.

She gives out litter grades.

[Biggus Dickus]

She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


_{That one may be the most painful.}

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.

She gives out litter grades.

Paw-lease, I heard she flunked everybody.

[Buddy]

I heard the substitute is a real bitch.