Happy Atheist Forum

Getting To Know You => Laid Back Lounge => Topic started by: Tank on April 24, 2012, 08:41:56 AM

Title: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Tank on April 24, 2012, 08:41:56 AM
Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Veet-Hair-Removal-Creme-200ml/dp/B000KKNQBK/)

Quote
DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS

Being a loose cannon who does not play by the rules the first thing I did was ignore the warning and smear this all over my knob and bollocks. The bollocks I knew and loved are gone now. In their place is a maroon coloured bag of agony which sends stabs of pain up my body every time it grazes against my thigh or an article of clothing. I am suffering so that you don't have to. Heed my lesson. DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS.

(I am giving this product a 5 because despite the fact that I think my bollocks might fall off, they are now completely hairless.)

My wife wondered what I was laughing at!!!
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Velma on April 24, 2012, 09:43:28 AM
Where's a facepalm smilie when you need it? 
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Asmodean on April 24, 2012, 10:09:30 AM
The things people do and the lengths they are willing to go to not to have hairy balls... Einstein was right: the world is mad and quantum theory is therefor true.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Whitney on April 25, 2012, 04:42:29 AM
all of the top reviews are pretty funny...apparently that product causes a lot of pain.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 25, 2012, 05:17:41 AM
LOL!

Love it when I run into these types of things. If the creme was explosive, he would've in the Darwin Awards ;D

Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Sweetdeath on April 25, 2012, 01:46:36 PM
Hair remover cream is just evil in general. This review is hilarious though, especially the "i play by my own rules!" XD
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Amicale on April 25, 2012, 01:58:43 PM
ROFL Atsamnok! (Tank & Asmo together)

That was hilarious!  :D I started laughing out out... and my cat looked up at me, and went "Ehm??" and ran away...
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Guardian85 on April 25, 2012, 05:20:20 PM
Ooohhhhh..... :D Gotta breathe!

Haven't laughed like that in ages.

Just for the record, Tank/Asmo: How did you come upon this hilarity?  ;)
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Buddy on April 25, 2012, 05:27:58 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on April 25, 2012, 05:20:20 PM
Ooohhhhh..... :D Gotta breathe!

Haven't laughed like that in ages.

Just for the record, Tank/Asmo: How did you come upon this hilarity?  ;)

I think it is a side effect of being English.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Tank on April 25, 2012, 06:27:34 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on April 25, 2012, 05:20:20 PM
Ooohhhhh..... :D Gotta breathe!

Haven't laughed like that in ages.

Just for the record, Tank/Asmo: How did you come upon this hilarity?  ;)
An Aussie mate of mine posted it on facebook.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Tank on April 25, 2012, 06:29:21 PM
I think this is the gem "maroon coloured bag of agony"!!!!

If you follow the link and look at reviews there are others.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: DeterminedJuliet on April 25, 2012, 07:15:02 PM
I think this one is my favourite! haha! :D

QuoteHowever if we ignore the blinding, crippling and debilitating pain I should point out that this product is remarkably effective. Before, all manner of organisms great and small lived down there, now nothing can grow; not even on a cellular level. Sadly this includes my genitalia; I've spent the last four hours staring fixedly at Carol Vorderman's arse, all to no avail. My tinkywinkleton hasn't even so much as perked up, so if my review seems a bit harsh, it's only because I wanted children.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Amicale on April 25, 2012, 07:30:13 PM
Quote from: DeterminedJuliet on April 25, 2012, 07:15:02 PM
I think this one is my favourite! haha! :D

QuoteHowever if we ignore the blinding, crippling and debilitating pain I should point out that this product is remarkably effective. Before, all manner of organisms great and small lived down there, now nothing can grow; not even on a cellular level. Sadly this includes my genitalia; I've spent the last four hours staring fixedly at Carol Vorderman's arse, all to no avail. My tinkywinkleton hasn't even so much as perked up, so if my review seems a bit harsh, it's only because I wanted children.

LOL!! :D

Ooooh, some of these are GREAT. And so obviously made up for the laugh factor, but they're still funny.

In the one star reviews, I found:

QuoteWhen I first heard about this product I must say I was excited . I ordered and received the cream and that evening liberally put the cream all over my man jungle . It was getting out of control and needed some drastic action before all was lost . If you know what I mean. Unfortunately I fell asleep . The nightmare i had was horrendeous i was in hell being chased buy a large frankfurter wearing a nazi helmit . when I woke up my man bush was still there but my fore skin had disappeared

and

QuoteI recommend diluting before use. Personally I diluted it with Deep Heat and Oven Cleaner and the resulting pain in my balls was far more bearable. Do NOT get this stuff on your bell-end.

:D
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Asmodean on April 25, 2012, 07:31:57 PM
Quote from: Asmo on April 25, 2012, 06:27:34 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on April 25, 2012, 05:20:20 PM
Ooohhhhh..... :D Gotta breathe!

Haven't laughed like that in ages.

Just for the record, Tank/Asmo: How did you come upon this hilarity?  ;)
An Aussie mate of mine posted it on facebook.
Besides, Asmos know all, do they not?  :D
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Tank on April 25, 2012, 07:33:41 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on April 25, 2012, 07:31:57 PM
Quote from: Asmo on April 25, 2012, 06:27:34 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on April 25, 2012, 05:20:20 PM
Ooohhhhh..... :D Gotta breathe!

Haven't laughed like that in ages.

Just for the record, Tank/Asmo: How did you come upon this hilarity?  ;)
An Aussie mate of mine posted it on facebook.
Besides, Asmos know all, do they not?  :D

I do, I do!
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Sweetdeath on April 26, 2012, 03:12:53 AM
Wait.. Asmo and Asmodean are same account?
It says   he's an admin xDD
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: DeterminedJuliet on April 26, 2012, 03:14:23 AM
Quote from: Sweetdeath on April 26, 2012, 03:12:53 AM
Wait.. Asmo and Asmodean are same account?
It says   he's an admin xDD

Hint: Some names and images may have changed, but everyone's post count and signatures have stayed the same.
Title: Re: Read the Amazon reviews on this product!!!!
Post by: Asmodean on April 26, 2012, 03:22:18 AM
Quote from: Sweetdeath on April 26, 2012, 03:12:53 AM
Wait.. Asmo and Asmodean are same account?
It says   he's an admin xDD
Mission accomplished  ;D