Happy Atheist Forum

Hey All,
I was having a discussion with someone the other day about "why" I became an atheist. We were talking about the prevalence of youth groups in our home state (Georgia). I told her that, ironically, church youth group is where I first took a look around and said "well isn't this a load of shit?" The culture of religion in the area I'm from is... a bit extreme. My family attended church together when I was very small but we moved out of town and never really went back again. I voluntarily attended youth and Sunday services with friends (we actually sat apart from the youth group kids and paid attention to the Sunday services). By the time I was in high school I already knew that I didn't agree with many cultural aspects of where I lived but I tried to excuse the things I didn't have a problem with with Bible niceties (i.e. homosexuality, teen sex, etc.). Any way... I was at youth service one Wednesday. We were discussing what it means to be "good." The youth pastor talked about Gandhi's good works. I was already inquisitive and an all around nerd so I actually knew who Gandhi was and had read a bit about him. So...(I'm sure you know where this is leading) when he dropped Gandhi's quote about Christians (“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.”), naturally all of the impressionable youths in the room were OUTRAGED, waahhh!! The guy sitting in front of me turned around and said "Gandhi...pfft who was that guy any way. He's wearing a stupid diaper." My mouth dropped. I hoped that the youth leader would maybe lead the discussion toward hypocrisy and how we could better ourselves as people- but no. He just laughed right along with everyone else. It was at that exact moment, looking around at the people I'd known since kindergarten, that I realized how much I didn't buy what they were trying to sell. After that, I went through the same thing I'm sure many of you have.

What about you guys? I know that many of you were raised in a religious household. Did any of you have an "aha" moment as well or was it more of a gradual wandering off?

Never been a believer, so no Ahah! moment for me. But I liked your story.

When I was 13, I began to take catechism classes at our catholic church. I was in a room with a woman preaching to us about God and the entire time, I felt like we were being fed BS that I couldn't honestly believe in. Also, my dad had just passed away and I was questioning the subject a lot. When I was a class away from completion, I told my mom that I wasn't a Catholic anymore and wouldn't go through with it. She was disappointed but she didn't know how to force me. At that point, I became an agnostic theist. After more deliberation and reading, I became an agnostic but I felt like I wasn't finished. I watched some Atheist Experience videos on youtube and they seemed to answer questions that others couldn't refute but I was afraid that even though I was mentally an atheist, my "heart" (I don't know how else to put it) couldn't accept that. Then on New Years, something horrible occurred and for a moment, I began to look for comfort in God because my whole childhood, I had truly believed God was there for me. I stopped "praying" because I realized that I really didn't believe I was talking to something. It felt as realistic as if I was conversing with a unicorn. Since then, I knew that my heart and mind were in the same place and I officially became an atheist. Consequently, much more empowering than relying on an unpredictable, invisible entity.

I can't say I've had such an 'aha!' moment either when things clicked.

But I think growing up in a christian home in a christian society I never took it seriously - I mean what they were trying to 'teach' always seemed like a joke. Was I really supposed to believe this?

When I did try to put the promises of christianity to the test, it failed miserably. And I realized that it wasn't true. I even spent some time trying to engage believers possibly as a way to get back to that naivete I had as a child. But they were unable to defend their faith against what I knew - and I grew in non-belief since then.

I've mentioned this elsewhere in the "getting to know you" area, but the first time I really realized that I didn't believe in God was in my last year of University. I had always been a more "liberal" Catholic. I've never been against gay marriage, abortion or anything like that, but in my last year of university I took a Holocaust History seminar course.
At one point I remember reading a first hand account about how two SS soldiers killed a young girl on the street in broad daylight. For absolutely no reason, because they were bored. I distinctly remember thinking "fuck this, there's no way there's a God."

Everything since then has kind of "clicked" and I find it strange to think that I ever subscribed to religion.

I was never religious, but I was confirmed and ever since then I wasn't agnostic anymore, I was an atheist.

I’m not sure about an aha moment but I can say that I was brought up fairly Christian, I was baptized catholic, but I think for me it was the vast and never ending contradictions. It started small with things like, if god loved us all like children, why would he initiate a massive flood to kill us all? If it all began with just Adam and just eve wouldn’t people have had to sleep with their brothers and sisters? How come god spoke to people in bible times but has not said anything to anyone since. What kind of sadistic practical joke is it to try to get a guy to kill his own son just for you to show up and stop him right at the last second. I understand now that most of that is used as metaphor but still why teach a child with a literal mind things that are so deeply buried in symbolism.

 I also got into science very early and so when I heard things like god is “up there” and the devil is “down there” I was always responding with, no…the milky way is “up there” and the earth’s mantle is “down there”. I was into paleontology, I loved fossils and dinosaurs, I was able to grasp the concept of evolution early and found that religion and since were quite considerably at odd with one another. I ultimately chose science and the god of empirical evidence.

Quote from: "Cecilie"I was never religious, but I was confirmed and ever since then I wasn't agnostic anymore, I was an atheist.

that is fairly cryptic, what do you mean, "confirmed" like in church? How did this persuade or dissuade you from further religiosity?

Quote from: "Twentythree"

Quote from: "Cecilie"I was never religious, but I was confirmed and ever since then I wasn't agnostic anymore, I was an atheist.

that is fairly cryptic, what do you mean, "confirmed" like in church? How did this persuade or dissuade you from further religiosity?

Yes, in a church. I didn't actually think people took the Bible seriously before that and learning that they did made me realize that I wasn't religious at all. I guess it's difficult to explain, especially since my English is fairly limited.

I join myself to those here who have never had such one moment of realisation.

There was, however, a moment when I started to identify myself as atheist. It's not a very fascinating story.

It had been a long day. Sitting here, I type on an old laptop in the early morning; I can not quite remember the events. I do remember it was cold. I can recall the frost from my breath. The barren trees. My classmates, now tidied away in cliques and trampy groups had sneered and jostled with me in the school hallways. All I wanted to do was get home and pray to my beloved god.

It was around high school that I began questioning my faith, thanks to the glowing screen of internet forums and atheist websites. Interestingly enough, it all started because I had wanted to converse with atheists about religious matters. You can imagine that I went through a veritable hell with struggles and doubt. In the end, the aha moment came while I was in the bathroom, naked and vulnerable. I was bent over, crying out for god--mary...joseph, anyone to help me. The cold showerhead sprayed needs on my skin, back, legs and neck. But as I lay there, locked in the feteal position...shivering...cold...and desperate--no one came.

It was then that I unlocked a tremendous depressioin within myself. I gave up.

Forgive the pun, but I pray that the story has a happy conclusion.

Quote from: "Soren Gregev"It had been a long day. Sitting here, I type on an old laptop in the early morning; I can not quite remember the events. I do remember it was cold. I can recall the frost from my breath. The barren trees. My classmates, now tidied away in cliques and trampy groups had sneered and jostled with me in the school hallways. All I wanted to do was get home and pray to my beloved god.

It was around high school that I began questioning my faith, thanks to the glowing screen of internet forums and atheist websites. Interestingly enough, it all started because I had wanted to converse with atheists about religious matters. You can imagine that I went through a veritable hell with struggles and doubt. In the end, the aha moment came while I was in the bathroom, naked and vulnerable. I was bent over, crying out for god--mary...joseph, anyone to help me. The cold showerhead sprayed needs on my skin, back, legs and neck. But as I lay there, locked in the feteal position...shivering...cold...and desperate--no one came.

It was then that I unlocked a tremendous depressioin within myself. I gave up.

Forgive the pun, but I pray that the story has a happy conclusion.

So, what were you looking for? What would you consider a happy ending?

Are you referring to giving up on the faith in the supernatural?

A life well lived, of course. Nothing more, nothing less.  

hmm not for me. I never had an "aha" moment. I remember when I was in elementary I would believe there was a god (but not in a church-going way. I believed he wouldn't care about stuff like that). But slowly slowly I started discovering national geographic and science in general, and made me realise, there's no place for a god. Everything is/will be explained.
It happened so gradually, that I honestly can't remember when I stopped believing and I became an atheist. Sometime between elementary an early high school I guess

Like many others here I didn't have a specific aha (or 'Eureka') moment, just an accumulation of 'hmmm' moments. My parents are what I call 'apatheists'. I think most people in the UK can be placed in that category. I never took any of it seriously even in Religious Education classes in school. One key moment - which I mentioned in the Introductions forum - was when a boy asked the following question in an RE class one day: why were we all punished when Adam & Eve bit a piece of fruit but rewarded for the murder of Jesus Christ? Apparently, biting that apple was the worst crime in the history of the universe; but on the other hand, scourging and crucifying the Son of God is... just great!
At the age of 12 I began to take an interest in space and discovered the sheer scale of the universe. Meanwhile, in RE, I read about the supposed creator of these 100 billion galaxies wrestling with Jacob, failing to defeat an army of iron chariots, commanding human and animal sacrifices (because he wanted to smell the burning flesh), and laying down, in great and tedious detail, how he wants ceremonies conducted.
This all struck me as being rather incongruous, to say the least.
At some point I wondered why they were wasting our time with all these bronze age ravings.

Quote from: "Maria"'apatheists'.

Never heard this before. I really like it.

I can't say I had an 'aha' moment, but I certainly had a 'well that's bloody done then' moment.

Grew up liberally christian, mostly fearing death and hell, having grandeur issues. Had a non-believing friend who was very supportive and helpful to me. Many little things adding up, like trying to read the bible and seeing how ridiculous the thing is

One day, considering how moral I had been and how proud of myself for many things I was, and what was truly good, I sparked up the cajones to write out a sort of goodbye prayer, which was something along the lines of this, with a little more verbal violence at the dear leader. Still have the paper: "Dear God, if you are truly a force of Good and Truth, I will serve you. If you are not Good, send me to your hell. I prefer to serve Goodness by suffering eternity in your hell, than to serve anything less than Goodness and Truth."

Bertrand Russell made a statement about one of his essays, something like "It requires more of a platonic view than I now hold." This seems about right.

Interestingly, I sometimes think the hell story is a good thing, as it certainly requires a lot convincing oneself that they are truly good in order to reach a high enough moral development to be ready to take on the lord for being evil. Of course if being good requires stoning homo's and remaining a virgin, clearly any possible utility has been negated, to say the least. So certainly the bible's hell story doesn't cut it.

No 'aha' moment.  Much more of a "you're not answering my questions and instead are persecuting me for searching for answers instead of just blindly following things that don't make sense" moment.

I wish I could remember. I doubt I confronted anybody about it. I like my privacy but being from West Virginia. My brothers and I were all cut from something different though. Being raised in a Baptist church with 99% christian rate, all of my 3 brothers and I independently became atheists(meaning I was the first but never shared with anybody I was atheist until much later and we all realized we were). We are all very cynical and critical about church.

Long story short, my freshman bio teacher and I debated evolution, me from a Christian perspective and her from a reality perspective, and she completely owned me. I realized I wasn't being skeptical of religion the way I was being skeptical of evolution, and that started me on the path to enlightenment. It took some time, but I think the moment it was all over is when I said "this is bullshit" in my internal monologue. After that, it was over.

I didn't have a deeply devote backround. I have searched through many religions but nothing made heads or tails. Even had the Mormons in my home answering my questions to try to find some faith, but there was none. Then Facebook came about, and I think that is what turned me for sure. Everyone's postings, for example something to the effect of people who barely make it out of events unscathed should thank God, not luck. I wanted to ask them "what about the people who were killed in such events? God not on their side?" Anyways, Facebook led me to be an atheist. Sure it was there already though.

No real "aha" moment either.
I was raised Catholic, but it was never too hardcore. I also attended Catholic school. It is a little different here though. In Ontario you pretty much have three choices(aside from French or English) regular public, Catholic(government supported) or private. So while it was Catholic it was pretty much just like a regular public school with some prayer and a Jesus class thrown in once a week or so, no nuns running around or anything.
Anyway I kind of just believed just because I was told the stories and that it was the truth, I had no reason to doubt. Most stories and passages we learned were the positive ones, i don't remember any "you are going to hell if you do so and so" moments. I hated going to church though way too boring, thankfully our family attendance was sporadic and as I got older we barely ever went.
I was confirmed, but I really didn't want to be. Basically to get into the Catholic club you are baptised as a child, your confirmation is supposed to be you as a young adult confirming that yes you want to be part of the club. The thing is at 12/13 I did not feel comfortable saying no. Even though my parents weren't very practising they are believers.
At this point I think it was more a case of being Agnostic, I knew I wanted nothing to do with church but I was still unsure of the whole God thing.
By my late teens I really didn't think about it anymore, I had more or less come to the realization that there is no God, or at least no reason to believe there is one. I made some new friends (brothers) who were raised Atheist, this helped to solidify my position as an Atheist.
Sorry if this wa a little long.

It is interesting to read others stories, no matter how long.  :)

I have felt so out of place most my life, it's so good to be understood for once.

My parents never forced any religion on me. When I was younger, I went to church, but that was only because my grandma tried to force it on me. I never understood what the preachers were saying, or how the stories came together. To me, it sounded like fairy tales. When I was in the first grade I told my grandma I didn't like church and I wanted to stop going. When I was about nine, my dad and I were coming home from the library. He had a book about atheism. I asked what an atheist was. Before then, I had never known that it was an option. I did some research into when I was 11 and decided it sounded right, and it made more sense than anything else.

One evening I stumbled upon a Laurence Krauss lecture about the nature of the universe. I was immediately impressed by how much more intelligent and reasonable he and the man who had introduced him - Richard Dawkins - seemed than the people I had grown up with. I had been leaning towards secularism for about a year, but that got me seriously thinking about it. I sent the video to a friend of mine who was in a similar situation. The next day we suddenly and simultaneously agreed that we were atheists.
That was a very good day.

Quote from: YaarghMatey487 on March 27, 2011, 08:25:12 AM
What about you guys? I know that many of you were raised in a religious household. Did any of you have an "aha" moment as well or was it more of a gradual wandering off?

I'd have to go with a gradual wandering off (lovely bit of imagery, by the way).  I spent most of my childhood and teens surrounded by a variety of conservative religious groups and just accepted that one believed in god.  My problem was that none of these religious groups or their myths really sat right with me, but I assumed I just hadn't found the right religion yet.  So I did a good bit of searching for many years -- Western religions, Eastern relgions, Pagan religions -- and things just kept on not sitting right.  I was in my 20s before it finally occurred to me that the reason no religion was taking was that I didn't actually believe in god.  It seems so obvious now, but it took awhile for that to dawn on me.

I realized that I was an atheist in my early teens when God never answered any of my prayers.