Happy Atheist Forum

A thread to bitch, boast, bemoan or beatify your kids!

Well I have three, one born in '84 and twins born in '86. The eldest sprogged in Nov 2010 which makes me a granddad  :upset:

It's been reminding me just what it was like all those years ago when I had my own 'nappy fillers'. The trouble is whatever anybody tells you before you have a rug rat bears absolutly no reality to what it is like to have one does it? People can tell you what it's like to change a nappy with a hangover because 'it's your turn' but the eye watering reality of an ammonia laced, just gone onto solids, crap has to be experienced to be appreciated.

When our first kid was born we were not particularly well off so we had terry towel nappies rather than disposables until....

Please remove all food and drink from your mouth before reading, you have been warned...
[spoiler:2j0q0yei]One day I was emptying the nappy bucket into the washing machine. As I flipped one nappy into the machine it whiplashed a piece of you know what into my mouth. I instantly threw up into the bucket and simple continued to load the machine. We used disposables from that point onwards and the nappies have done sterling service as car polishing cloths ever since.[/spoiler:2j0q0yei]

Ya, I don't know if I ever really want to have kids. Growing up I always assumed that I would, but nowadays th eidea just seems silly. Maybe I'm too selfish and want to continue to improve my own quality of living instead of having to worry about sending kids to college, their medical bills, feeding them, ect. There are still plenty of things I would like to do before I do that. The gf wants to have children though - she says she doesn't - she's a junior high band director and says she deals with children enough during her day-job, but I don't really believe her.

I was never sure if I wanted to have children and my husband and I spent 10 good years trying to figure out whether we did or not before commiting to it. Once pregnant, I read everything I could get my hands on. All of that planning and research really didnt prepare me, so I don't think being prepared for it is ever possible  ;) ), but don't think that is in the cards at this point.

^^^ I've never heard of a kid that would not lay on his back! How long did it take you to work out to keep his pee pee covered for as much of the time as possible while you change him?  :rant:

And don't worry about how long they stay in nappies. All three of ours just got to the point of not wanting to wear them anymore and we never had any bed wetting issues.

I should re-phrase that...he does lie on his back, he just Hates it. So when he was tiny and new, if I put him on his back he'd scream bloody murder or wake up (even in sleep he knew he was uncomfortable). Once he could roll over he'd immediately roll out of my grasp. So, I got really good at disctracting him with something that interested him more than wanting to get up. It has gotten progressively harder, and now I just usually change his bum while he's standing or on all fours. I can still hold the diaper up against him, but he was never one to pee when the diaper came off anyway. Lately the only thing that keeps him on his back is when he is drinking a bottle, but he doesnt do that very often anymore (prefers a cup and we're moving on to big boy cups/foods etc...). It will be so lovely when he is out of diapers.

Since he was born he's been able to hold up his head and look around, and has always found that upright position best. If he was unhappy when he was tiny, all I'd have to do is stand up with him over my shoulder. But, that meant I had to learn how to do almost everything with him over my shoulder all day. He is still like that. He runs around constantly on his own (he is very busy), but when he gets upset, he just wants to be up high and checking things out.

It's that curiosity and determination that will help make him a great person, so I'm not complaining. He is certainly a handful though.

He sounds like a grand little chap, with the potential to make you very proud.

Quote from: "Tank"He sounds like a grand little chap, with the potential to make you very proud.

I certainly think so

I have rats. They ruin things and demand toys and attention and eat what they shouldn't. Just like kids, yes?  

Seriously, I don't want kids. I don't even want a lasting romantic relationship... Just not my thing. The less responsibility, the better.

Quote from: "Asmodean"I have rats. They ruin things and demand toys and attention and eat what they shouldn't. Just like kids, yes?  

Seriously, I don't want kids. I don't even want a lasting romantic relationship... Just not my thing. The less responsibility, the better.

Have you cleared up the feathers yet?

Quote from: "Tank"Have you cleared up the feathers yet?

With an industrial vaccum cleaner, no less  :verysad:

I tell people to get dogs instead. They're cheaper, better behaved, always happy to see you, and in the case of my dogs, are smarter than my kids.  

I have four sons, from ages 24 - 17. 'nuff said.

Lost...for worrying about SIDS; they make pads you can set under the crib mattress that makes sure their heart is beating and they are breathing.  My sister has one for her baby and it works well...if you forget to tell it you took the baby out an alarm goes off in the next 30 seconds and it is annoying so you wouldn't have to worry about sleeping through it.

Quote from: "McQ"I tell people to get dogs instead. They're cheaper, better behaved, always happy to see you, and in the case of my dogs, are smarter than my kids.  

I have four sons, from ages 24 - 17. 'nuff said.

Oooo that sounds expensive!

My wife is pregnant right now with our first child and I’m excited about it. She is freaking out because she is on her last month. She is huge!   I’m told it’s tough to be a parent, but I do not care. I love kids and want to have a couple before I’m 30.

Quote from: "father nicetouch"My wife is pregnant right now with our first child and I’m excited about it. She is freaking out because she is on her last month. She is huge!  :D

EDIT: I bet she's not as big as my wife when she had the twins, they were 7lb 2oz and 7lb 12oz!

I've got 3 now (1,3,5) - last night they were all in the bath and eating biscuits that I'd given them on the way up to the top floor - after a couple of minutes in the bath I noticed a floating bit of biscuit debris so I fished it out to chuck in the sink.... I gave it a quick sniff. NOT BISCUIT  :crazy:

I wouldnt get rid but I could quite happily skip the incontinent phase  

Quote from: "tubbyman"I've got 3 now (1,3,5) - last night they were all in the bath and eating biscuits that I'd given them on the way up to the top floor - after a couple of minutes in the bath I noticed a floating bit of biscuit debris so I fished it out to chuck in the sink.... I gave it a quick sniff. NOT BISCUIT  :crazy:

I wouldnt get rid but I could quite happily skip the incontinent phase  :puke:

Quote from: "Tank"

Quote from: "tubbyman"I've got 3 now (1,3,5) - last night they were all in the bath and eating biscuits that I'd given them on the way up to the top floor - after a couple of minutes in the bath I noticed a floating bit of biscuit debris so I fished it out to chuck in the sink.... I gave it a quick sniff. NOT BISCUIT  :crazy:

I wouldnt get rid but I could quite happily skip the incontinent phase  :puke:

swimming pools are munting - i go swimming every day and whilst gazing at the bottom of the pool through goggles I'm always thinking 'what the f++= is that??' whilst swimming past a nasty bit of beige detritus  

Quote from: "Whitney"Lost...for worrying about SIDS; they make pads you can set under the crib mattress that makes sure their heart is beating and they are breathing.  My sister has one for her baby and it works well...if you forget to tell it you took the baby out an alarm goes off in the next 30 seconds and it is annoying so you wouldn't have to worry about sleeping through it.

Thank you I do have one of those. It's an Angel care Monitor. It was still difficult to come to terms with putting my baby to sleep on his stomach when he was just born. They really really make you feel as though you are intentionally trying to harm your child if you do that. He is good and sturdy now, and most Pediatricians say that once they have head control and can roll over on their own it is okay.

Quote from: "father nicetouch"My wife is pregnant right now with our first child and I’m excited about it. She is freaking out because she is on her last month. She is huge!   I’m told it’s tough to be a parent, but I do not care. I love kids and want to have a couple before I’m 30.

Congratulations! It is tough, but it really is worth it. The good far outweighs any difficulty, at least for me anyway. What is her due date? My son will be one year old March 11th.

Kids are fun, but when they start driving they become a worry.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FQ0YHs.jpg&hash=0648d4cafbccac79a1f8e5bc5fdb0d465ec82f56)

Never wanted kids.  That was confirmed during a few years of living with my sister and her kids while she was ill.  I love my niece and nephews, but it is hard work and takes a huge amount of time and emotional commitment - and I've only just gotten my own head straightened out.

My story is similar to Lost's in that it took a very longtime for me and my wife to decide to have a kid. And to be honest, it was mostly me who was pushing for it. We are (were) very social, enjoying travels to nice parts of the world during our holidays every year, etc. It was hard to think about limiting ourselves. We knew that all this had to take a blow and we knew that taking care of a newborn wouldn't be easy.

Now, my son is not even three-month old yet and he has colic. Thinking back, nothing could prepare me for this reality and I keep saying that I was very naive (the reason why I'm up and reading the forum at 4:30 in the morning is him)  :D I guess it's going to be a more rewarding experience once we start to interact with him properly.

And also, I had never realized that sleep was such a rare and under-appreciated gem

My wife and I met each other too late in life to have kids. She was pursuing a management career, so having kids would be very inconvenient. She also thinks that she would not have become a good mother, because she was abused (physically, not sexually!) by her mother in her own youth. I think she is right, because my wife has occasionally mood swings (something to do with her brain chemistry).

Quote from: "DirtyLeo"And also, I had never realized that sleep was such a rare and under-appreciated gem :sigh:

Quote from: "Tank"We partially got around this by having a day-on/day-off cycle as our first daughter was bottle fed. That way at least one of us got one decent nights sleep each other day.

My wife is breastfeeding so we can't take turns. We're trying to introduce bottles but as he has colic, this hasn't been too successful. At the moment, we're trying a different lactose-free formula. *crosses fingers*. At night, most nights, she feeds him while I try to sleep then she tries to sleep and I wind him & put him to bed.

Quote from: "Tank"Then we had twins and that plan went out the window  

I feel for you. I cannot even imagine how hard it must be. At times, it feels like even one is too many.

Quote from: "DirtyLeo"My story is similar to Lost's in that it took a very longtime for me and my wife to decide to have a kid. And to be honest, it was mostly me who was pushing for it. We are (were) very social, enjoying travels to nice parts of the world during our holidays every year, etc. It was hard to think about limiting ourselves. We knew that all this had to take a blow and we knew that taking care of a newborn wouldn't be easy.

Now, my son is not even three-month old yet and he has colic. Thinking back, nothing could prepare me for this reality and I keep saying that I was very naive (the reason why I'm up and reading the forum at 4:30 in the morning is him)  :D I guess it's going to be a more rewarding experience once we start to interact with him properly.

And also, I had never realized that sleep was such a rare and under-appreciated gem :hmm: So much for that idea.
We really wanted two children because we have nieces and nephews that are single children, and see the difficulty that can cause. I am heartbroken (additionally) that my son won't have a sibling now, but feel a slight (tiny) sense of relief that I won't have to go through that process again. If my husband were still here, I'd do it in a heartbeat though. It really does pass fairly quickly, and the next stage is quite rewarding.

Quote from: "Tank"

Quote from: "father nicetouch"My wife is pregnant right now with our first child and I’m excited about it. She is freaking out because she is on her last month. She is huge!  :D

EDIT: I bet she's not as big as my wife when she had the twins, they were 7lb 2oz and 7lb 12oz!

“Burst” just sounds painful. I like the word "release" better.  

But your wife does sound like she did go through a lot of pain. Those were some big babies!

My wife wants to watch what she eats because she does not want the baby to come out to big. But I tell her to go nuts and eat everything she sees. I rather the baby come out big and healthy than the other way around.

Quote from: "Lost"Congratulations! It is tough, but it really is worth it. The good far outweighs any difficulty, at least for me anyway. What is her due date? My son will be one year old March 11th.

She is due on March 25, but the way she looks looks right now I think she is going to be due earlier. oh, and it's a baby girl!  

Quote from: "father nicetouch"But your wife does sound like she did go through a lot of pain. Those were some big babies!

She had an elective caesarean under a general anaesthetic so she was out of it and because she was under anaesthetic I didn't get to see the babies until they'd all been cleaned up.    She nearly died of blood loss, she needed 8 pints. That's the reason I have zero tolerance for Jehovahs Witnesses. If they had their way my wife, and untold others, would be dead. I consider them murderers in all but the act.

Quote from: "father nicetouch"

Quote from: "Lost"Congratulations! It is tough, but it really is worth it. The good far outweighs any difficulty, at least for me anyway. What is her due date? My son will be one year old March 11th.

She is due on March 25, but the way she looks looks right now I think she is going to be due earlier. oh, and it's a baby girl!  :) Lovely! I was due March 26th, and was repeatedly told that first babies tend to come late, so was not at all prepared when I went into labour early. I ate really well for my three meals a day (vitamins, nutrients and all that), but indulged too, and my son came out a healthy 8 lbs (at just shy of 38 weeks).

Quote from: "father nicetouch"

Quote from: "Lost"Congratulations! It is tough, but it really is worth it. The good far outweighs any difficulty, at least for me anyway. What is her due date? My son will be one year old March 11th.

She is due on March 25, but the way she looks looks right now I think she is going to be due earlier. oh, and it's a baby girl!  :D

Quote from: "Tank"

Quote from: "father nicetouch"But your wife does sound like she did go through a lot of pain. Those were some big babies!

She had an elective caesarean under a general anaesthetic so she was out of it and because she was under anaesthetic I didn't get to see the babies until they'd all been cleaned up.    She nearly died of blood loss, she needed 8 pints. That's the reason I have zero tolerance for Jehovahs Witnesses. If they had their way my wife, and untold others, would be dead. I consider them murderers in all but the act.

Jehovah’s witnesses are something else I tell you. But, I’m happy for you and your wife and that everything turned out fine for both of you.

Quote from: "Whitney"

Quote from: "father nicetouch"

Quote from: "Lost"Congratulations! It is tough, but it really is worth it. The good far outweighs any difficulty, at least for me anyway. What is her due date? My son will be one year old March 11th.

She is due on March 25, but the way she looks looks right now I think she is going to be due earlier. oh, and it's a baby girl!  :D

We need more atheist soldiers for the meat grinder!  :hissyfit:

Quote from: "father nicetouch"We need more atheist soldiers for the meat grinder!  :hissyfit:

...btw, if your future kids needs little heathen play mates we just had 2 births this past year with one on the way in august at fof (link in sig); it would be nice to meet you some time.

Quote from: "Whitney"

Quote from: "father nicetouch"We need more atheist soldiers for the meat grinder!  :hissyfit:

lol

Yikes. And how much mouthwash did you use after your little incident with the flying number 2?

Disposable diapers are the best thing since toilet paper.

Quote from: "ForTheLoveOfAll"Yikes. And how much mouthwash did you use after your little incident with the flying number 2?

Disposable diapers are the best thing since toilet paper.

It was not pleasant, I can tell you that!