I'm really upset right now. A religious person made a comment on a Squidoo lens of mine that has me both furious and sad.
Here's the backstory -
When I was on the streets I was raped and stabbed. I crawled, half-naked and bleeding, behind a dumpster to hide. An incredibly brave and compassionate homeless man saved my life. He coaxed me from behind the dumpster and, when I was crying not to be taken to an emergency room but to be allowed to die (I was in shock and delirious but unfortunately I remember it all) he carried me to the motel room of a friend and washed me as if I were a child all the while working to convince me to let him take me to a hospital. He convinced me and he pushed me there in a shopping cart. I know it was an incredible risk for him, a homeless man covered in blood bringing a delirious girl with stab wounds to a hospital. It was plainly an act of heroism.
So I wrote about it on one of my pages about homelessness.
A religious person read it and then went to my main page on atheism and stated this:
QuoteI just want to say this - I read about how you were saved by Justus...that was your angel, God reaching out to you and saving your life. I pray you can see the amazing mercy you were shown.
I find it incredibly, over-the-top offensive. A real, flesh and blood man to whom I owe my life risked jail time and who knows what else to save my life is dehumanized in a sentence, made a puppet of God. I made a response on the page but it's less than what I want to say.
Quote from: "Kylyssa"I'm really upset right now. A religious person made a comment on a Squidoo lens of mine that has me both furious and sad.
Here's the backstory -
When I was on the streets I was raped and stabbed. I crawled, half-naked and bleeding, behind a dumpster to hide. An incredibly brave and compassionate homeless man saved my life. He coaxed me from behind the dumpster and, when I was crying not to be taken to an emergency room but to be allowed to die (I was in shock and delirious but unfortunately I remember it all) he carried me to the motel room of a friend and washed me as if I were a child all the while working to convince me to let him take me to a hospital. He convinced me and he pushed me there in a shopping cart. I know it was an incredible risk for him, a homeless man covered in blood bringing a delirious girl with stab wounds to a hospital. It was plainly an act of heroism.
So I wrote about it on one of my pages about homelessness.
A religious person read it and then went to my main page on atheism and stated this:
QuoteI just want to say this - I read about how you were saved by Justus...that was your angel, God reaching out to you and saving your life. I pray you can see the amazing mercy you were shown.
I find it incredibly, over-the-top offensive. A real, flesh and blood man to whom I owe my life risked jail time and who knows what else to save my life is dehumanized in a sentence, made a puppet of God. I made a response on the page but it's less than what I want to say.
Had he finished you off, the blame would be entirely his own.
That was a pretty fucked up thing to say, but it sounds like he was trying to be supportive (though I can't say for certain, being that I don't know him). I think it's sad that so many religious folks can't express support without invoking the magic man.
Quote from: "Thumpalumpacus"Had he finished you off, the blame would be entirely his own.
I know. That's what I find so dehumanizing about giving God credit for good. They never think to give God credit for the guy that stuck a buck knife and a penis into me without authorization, he was acting on his own. But Justus was to them a puppet of God, incapable of doing good without God working the strings.
What Justus did was so flawed, so earnest and human and, in my eyes, so beautiful. Logically, he should have just covered me up to prevent chilling and called 911 from the nearest payphone. It would have been more effective and protected him from the risk. But he did his human best, he was terrified of the police and seemed to suffer from some kind of dementia as well as what looked like Parkinson's though maybe it was just the incredible stress of the situation messing with his mind. I'll never know. But he was very brave and he saved my life. He
alone saved my life. Well, and the doctors and surgeons at the hospital, but you know what I mean.
Quote from: "PoopShoot"That was a pretty fucked up thing to say, but it sounds like he was trying to be supportive (though I can't say for certain, being that I don't know him). I think it's sad that so many religious folks can't express support without invoking the magic man.
I don't think it was support at all. Support would have been on the page with the story of the rape and the rescue. This is evangelism. Otherwise, why would she go to the page on atheism to discuss it?
That was a highly, highly insensitive comment. That person's inability to comfort you within the framework of your own belief system is truly disrespectful and rude. It would be like me going to the funeral of a religious person and, in front of his or her mourning friends and family declaring there is no heaven and they'll never see their loved on again and they're all fools for thinking otherwise. Regardless of whether or not I meant well, the behavior would have been insensitive and disrespectful.
Quote from: "Kylyssa"I don't think it was support at all.
I wouldn't know, I wasn't there. It was just a comment based on what little info I did have. I honestly can't imagine the situation anyway, I've never been stabbed or raped. Neither have I been further victimized by someone's insensitive comment. Out of curiosity, did they catch the guy who did do it?
Quote from: "PoopShoot"Quote from: "Kylyssa"I don't think it was support at all.
I wouldn't know, I wasn't there. It was just a comment based on what little info I did have. I honestly can't imagine the situation anyway, I've never been stabbed or raped. Neither have I been further victimized by someone's insensitive comment. Out of curiosity, did they catch the guy who did do it?
It happened
20ish years ago so it is a mostly healed wound. No, they didn't catch the guy, probably in part because my rescuer bathed me and threw out my remaining clothes. Possibly it was partly because they were a bit fixated on the homeless guy who brought me to the ER even though he was decades older than my attacker and of the wrong race, too.
The reason I don't see it as support is because the person used the information to post to another page of mine using my rescuer's heroics as proof of God's existence on a different page I wrote on a completely different subject. It's akin to if she came here and said it. The other page is much more visible than my presence on HA though.
It was on a page, not in person.
At my friend's funeral on Monday, his mother and a few of his closer friends kept saying how god must have had a reason to force his hand, etc. (for those who haven't heard this story, he killed himself last Sunday.) Anyway, I stayed respectful and let them grieve in their own way no matter how backwards I found it to be. It's terribly unfortunate that the good deeds of others always get chalked up to god, as if to say that mankind isn't capable of just doing the right thing, for the sake of doing the right thing.
It was a pretty damn snitty thing to post on an atheism page. The person probably wasn't trying to be snitty - just trying to help you through your deep, dark depression (aka atheism). Don't get angry at people who feel the need to undermine your (lack of) beliefs. Feel pity for them for their need to 'spread the word' and indoctrinate others.
In my experience, people who post such comments are trying to feel good about themselves. They want to feel superior or special in some way and can't quite manage it. There is an atheist thread on a breast cancer forum that is off limits to theists. Every once in a while a believer posts on the board to save us. It is irritating and somewhat sad.
Kylyssa, I think it is wonderful that the memories of the horror of your rape and stabbing have the salve of the sweet memories of that kind, courageous man. Thank you for telling us this part of your life.
The commenter has a demented sense of mercy and a sadistic sense of compassion.
Fuck her. Just because shes too stupid to understand that a compasionate person and your personel hero is infact a real human and a good person doesn't take away from the fact that he was a good person and friend to you. Let her have her self rightious ignorance, it only lowers her as a person. It seems like Justus was a better human being on the streets then all her holier then thou piety has made her in her life.
The commentator was probably motivated by the same things that cause other people to evangelise, but in their zeal, they saw a juicy nugget (which most normal people would know was off limits) and thought to use it in their mission to convert. To them, this being the work of god, is probably clear as day.
It would be interesting, to see one of these people (those who attribute good things to God) and say to them "Wow, god has really done something amazing to grant you this gift, you should thank him for it" right after they have done something they are very proud of, like passing their exams, or building their house etc. I imagine they would want to claim at least some of the credit themselves.
Also, about the earlier "forcing his hand" comment about the suicide, I wonder if these same people question why god "forced Hitler's hand" etc? It seems to be a way of moving blame/guilt around so as to comfort themselves, though the lack of logic is astounding even in stressful times.
I want to say what a nice chap that man must have been, helping another person, simply because they need your help is a very noble thing to do.
QuoteI just want to say this - I read about how you were saved by Justus...that was your angel, God reaching out to you and saving your life. I pray you can see the amazing mercy you were shown.
Well we've said this sort of thing before, but anyway, why didn't this angel turn up a bit earlier with a samurai sword and a righteous attitude.
I hope us sharing your fury helps with your sadness.
Quote from: "DropLogic"At my friend's funeral on Monday, his mother and a few of his closer friends kept saying how god must have had a reason to force his hand, etc. (for those who haven't heard this story, he killed himself last Sunday.) Anyway, I stayed respectful and let them grieve in their own way no matter how backwards I found it to be. It's terribly unfortunate that the good deeds of others always get chalked up to god, as if to say that mankind isn't capable of just doing the right thing, for the sake of doing the right thing.
I'm sorry to hear of your friend's death. For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing in keeping your piece.
Quote from: "The Magic Pudding"QuoteI just want to say this - I read about how you were saved by Justus...that was your angel, God reaching out to you and saving your life. I pray you can see the amazing mercy you were shown.
Well we've said this sort of thing before, but anyway, why didn't this angel turn up a bit earlier with a samurai sword and a righteous attitude.
I hope us sharing your fury helps with your sadness.
This bears repeating. The angels in the bible had swords with flaming tornadoes for blades to keep people out of Eden, yet not one could be found to protect a young rape victim? Yerite.
Quote from: "Thumpalumpacus"Quote from: "DropLogic"At my friend's funeral on Monday, his mother and a few of his closer friends kept saying how god must have had a reason to force his hand, etc. (for those who haven't heard this story, he killed himself last Sunday.) Anyway, I stayed respectful and let them grieve in their own way no matter how backwards I found it to be. It's terribly unfortunate that the good deeds of others always get chalked up to god, as if to say that mankind isn't capable of just doing the right thing, for the sake of doing the right thing.
I'm sorry to hear of your friend's death. For what it's worth, I think you did the right thing in keeping your piece.
I think that is one of the main distinctions between free-thinkers and religious people: Tact.
QuoteThis bears repeating. The angels in the bible had swords with flaming tornadoes for blades to keep people out of Eden, yet not one could be found to protect a young rape victim? Yerite.
QuoteWell we've said this sort of thing before, but anyway, why didn't this angel turn up a bit earlier with a samurai sword and a righteous attitude.
Seriously. If god is real he is completly useless. Whats he supposed to be doing all day, sitting on a cloud watching porn? It sucks sometimes but we only have each other to count on.
QuoteIn my experience, people who post such comments are trying to feel good about themselves. They want to feel superior or special in some way and can't quite manage it.
Completely agree. It ironic that such selfish, narcissistic people think we need THEIR help rofl. Makes me sick.
I'm sorry that this happened to you. Its possible the idiot got caught for a similar crime. That kind of criminal rarely changes their habits. If that happened he definately got what he deserved in prison. The inmates aren't friendly to rapists and pediphiles. I wouldn't give any more thought to that theist, other than to pity such misguided stupidity. Those kind of people are never happy, thats why they spend so much time trying to make everyone else as miserable as they are.
Wow you have lead a hard life. I hope things are going better for you. Anyway, I agree that person was horrible to say that - believe it or not there are some ordinary human beings that can be heroes - with no godstrings attached.
The religious can often shamelessly plagarise the acts of compassionate humans to make their God sound better or more rightous when its something terrible thats been done to an individual or group of people who fall foul of religious prejedice. In your situation that man deserved public recognition for his act which undoubtably saved your life, and your yourself deserve praise for being brave enough to speak about it.
That religious individual isn't even worth your contempt.
Quote from: "Will"That was a highly, highly insensitive comment. That person's inability to comfort you within the framework of your own belief system is truly disrespectful and rude. It would be like me going to the funeral of a religious person and, in front of his or her mourning friends and family declaring there is no heaven and they'll never see their loved on again and they're all fools for thinking otherwise. Regardless of whether or not I meant well, the behavior would have been insensitive and disrespectful.
When religious people say things which really offend others, i often wonder whether it is a naive statement borne from good will, or whether they realise the pain it will cause and use that as a device to piss people off into (a hopeful) submission for the lord.
Somehow, i feel that disrespectful person knew the pain they'd bring from such a comment and are secretly happy it caused pain.
All i can say is, keep soldiering on Kylyssa. We all think you are awesome. Fuck the others.
Quote from: "karadan"Quote from: "Will"That was a highly, highly insensitive comment. That person's inability to comfort you within the framework of your own belief system is truly disrespectful and rude. It would be like me going to the funeral of a religious person and, in front of his or her mourning friends and family declaring there is no heaven and they'll never see their loved on again and they're all fools for thinking otherwise. Regardless of whether or not I meant well, the behavior would have been insensitive and disrespectful.
When religious people say things which really offend others, i often wonder whether it is a naive statement borne from good will, or whether they realise the pain it will cause and use that as a device to piss people off into (a hopeful) submission for the lord.
Somehow, i feel that disrespectful person knew the pain they'd bring from such a comment and are secretly happy it caused pain.
All i can say is, keep soldiering on Kylyssa. We all think you are awesome. Fuck the others.
Eh, no one can no for sure what that person's intent was...but I'm guessing that citing religion is the only way they've been taught to cope with tragedy. They literally don't know how to react in any other way.
Quote from: "DropLogic"Quote from: "karadan"Quote from: "Will"That was a highly, highly insensitive comment. That person's inability to comfort you within the framework of your own belief system is truly disrespectful and rude. It would be like me going to the funeral of a religious person and, in front of his or her mourning friends and family declaring there is no heaven and they'll never see their loved on again and they're all fools for thinking otherwise. Regardless of whether or not I meant well, the behavior would have been insensitive and disrespectful.
When religious people say things which really offend others, i often wonder whether it is a naive statement borne from good will, or whether they realise the pain it will cause and use that as a device to piss people off into (a hopeful) submission for the lord.
Somehow, i feel that disrespectful person knew the pain they'd bring from such a comment and are secretly happy it caused pain.
All i can say is, keep soldiering on Kylyssa. We all think you are awesome. Fuck the others.
Eh, no one can no for sure what that person's intent was...but I'm guessing that citing religion is the only way they've been taught to cope with tragedy. They literally don't know how to react in any other way.
I've personally seen spite from religious people aimed at non-religious people simply because of their non-belief. It isn't just a coping mechanism but is also a tool to cement one's own (perceived) hierarchy upon someone else. Many religious people would consider themselves morally superior and would therefore not bat an eyelid when being spiteful to others, simply for the sake of it. I guess it can probably be born from frustration as well. 'How can these people not see the glory of the lord' etc...
Theists are no different than others. Many have generous hearts. Many have dark hearts.