Title: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: tymygy on September 22, 2010, 10:33:41 PM
Post by: tymygy on September 22, 2010, 10:33:41 PM
What would it be!?!
Personally, I'd ask. "Why would you, after creating humans, create diseases? Then why would you create an immune system to protect humans from the diseases you created? And why did you make HIV and Aids which destroys the immune system you made?"
Personally, I'd ask. "Why would you, after creating humans, create diseases? Then why would you create an immune system to protect humans from the diseases you created? And why did you make HIV and Aids which destroys the immune system you made?"
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: TheWilliam on September 22, 2010, 11:01:44 PM
Post by: TheWilliam on September 22, 2010, 11:01:44 PM
I'd ask............
May I have $357.22?
How do I download songs from myspace?
Will you help Debra Messing fill out her shirts better?
Will there ever be a movie with Macaulay Culkin playing opposite Ryan Phillipe?
Are you going to deliver Debra Messing to my house after you make her fill out her shirts better?
if not then fuck off.
May I have $357.22?
How do I download songs from myspace?
Will you help Debra Messing fill out her shirts better?
Will there ever be a movie with Macaulay Culkin playing opposite Ryan Phillipe?
Are you going to deliver Debra Messing to my house after you make her fill out her shirts better?
if not then fuck off.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: RosaRubicondior on September 22, 2010, 11:30:42 PM
Post by: RosaRubicondior on September 22, 2010, 11:30:42 PM
I'd ask God, "Why did you deceive me?"
What do you think God would say?
What do you think God would say?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: notself on September 22, 2010, 11:32:03 PM
Post by: notself on September 22, 2010, 11:32:03 PM
I'd ask, Who made you?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Davin on September 22, 2010, 11:40:21 PM
Post by: Davin on September 22, 2010, 11:40:21 PM
What's up?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: The Magic Pudding on September 23, 2010, 12:56:57 AM
Post by: The Magic Pudding on September 23, 2010, 12:56:57 AM
Who did you most enjoy be getting?
Athena, Apollo, Artemis, Hermes, Persephone, Dionysus, Perseus, Heracles, Helen, Minos, the Muses, Hebe, Hephaestus or other?
What was the most fun form to take in all this begetting?
I think being a bull could be fun, but an eagle I'm unsure of.
What do you do with yourself these days?
I miss you, the current pretender is a hypocritical bastard, no fun at all.
He's crap at delegating authority, he kind of delegates to himself, but don't ask me to explain it.
There's no Aphrodite, Eros, Apollo or Dionysus.
The new bloke is quite effective at keeping the wars, plagues and famines coming though.
Anyway I'm building a little shrine for you, do you like cashews?
Athena, Apollo, Artemis, Hermes, Persephone, Dionysus, Perseus, Heracles, Helen, Minos, the Muses, Hebe, Hephaestus or other?
What was the most fun form to take in all this begetting?
I think being a bull could be fun, but an eagle I'm unsure of.
What do you do with yourself these days?
I miss you, the current pretender is a hypocritical bastard, no fun at all.
He's crap at delegating authority, he kind of delegates to himself, but don't ask me to explain it.
There's no Aphrodite, Eros, Apollo or Dionysus.
The new bloke is quite effective at keeping the wars, plagues and famines coming though.
Anyway I'm building a little shrine for you, do you like cashews?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: tymygy on September 23, 2010, 06:48:31 AM
Post by: tymygy on September 23, 2010, 06:48:31 AM
I LOL'd at every answer. xD
I needed a good laugh, I've had a ROUGH fuckin day.
I needed a good laugh, I've had a ROUGH fuckin day.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: i_am_i on September 23, 2010, 06:53:19 AM
Post by: i_am_i on September 23, 2010, 06:53:19 AM
If I ever met God I'd ask, "So where the hell have you been while all this shit has been going on?" And no matter what answer he gave me I'd fire the motherfucker right there on the spot.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Martin TK on September 23, 2010, 09:45:34 AM
Post by: Martin TK on September 23, 2010, 09:45:34 AM
I'd have to ask, How am I asking a question to someone who doesn't exist? Then I'd kick him in the nuts for all the suffering he's caused, real or imaginary.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Tank on September 23, 2010, 11:59:25 AM
Post by: Tank on September 23, 2010, 11:59:25 AM
if you ever need a stand in while you go on holiday you only have to ask!
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Asmodean on September 23, 2010, 12:13:00 PM
Post by: Asmodean on September 23, 2010, 12:13:00 PM
Would you die if I shot you? :raised:
Alternatively: would you taste good in my soup?
Alternatively: would you taste good in my soup?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Gawen on September 26, 2010, 01:41:04 PM
Post by: Gawen on September 26, 2010, 01:41:04 PM
Why are you such a prick?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Bediddle on September 26, 2010, 03:07:29 PM
Post by: Bediddle on September 26, 2010, 03:07:29 PM
The Catholic Church... 9/11...are you happy now?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: wildfire_emissary on September 26, 2010, 04:23:44 PM
Post by: wildfire_emissary on September 26, 2010, 04:23:44 PM
how do you do it?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Thumpalumpacus on September 26, 2010, 04:46:48 PM
Post by: Thumpalumpacus on September 26, 2010, 04:46:48 PM
I know my ex- can be a bitch, but do you have to keep trying to kill her? [I've already asked this one. Got no answer.]
Why can't I ever get the B & high E strings on my guitar to be in tune with both my G and low E?
If Ned leaves Chicago at 2 pm heading east at 45 mph and Joe leaves west out of Schenectady at 35 mph at 2 pm, when will they meet? Remember, Joe's car has a tie-rod that's getting ready to go. Also, what are they getting together to do?
Why can't I ever get the B & high E strings on my guitar to be in tune with both my G and low E?
If Ned leaves Chicago at 2 pm heading east at 45 mph and Joe leaves west out of Schenectady at 35 mph at 2 pm, when will they meet? Remember, Joe's car has a tie-rod that's getting ready to go. Also, what are they getting together to do?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Asmodean on September 26, 2010, 05:21:23 PM
Post by: Asmodean on September 26, 2010, 05:21:23 PM
Quote from: "Thumpalumpacus"Also, what are they getting together to do?I know that one! Only one thing to do with two cars that meet
THIS:(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nrk.no%2Fcontentfile%2Ffile%2F1.6521112%21f169CropList%2Fimg650x367.jpg&hash=cf01eb27d1fe2d34eb67aba30528a7043d7444f4)
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: KDbeads on September 26, 2010, 08:20:21 PM
Post by: KDbeads on September 26, 2010, 08:20:21 PM
"Who's responsible?"
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Will on September 26, 2010, 08:29:49 PM
Post by: Will on September 26, 2010, 08:29:49 PM
I really wouldn't want anything to do with a god. It's pretty clear, if there is a god, he/she/it is of absolutely no natural consequence. Everything seems to happen on its own without any supernatural interference, therefore any god or gods that might exist have no role in reality. I can't imagine a less important thing.
So I wouldn't ask he/she/it anything.
So I wouldn't ask he/she/it anything.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: DropLogic on September 28, 2010, 08:40:33 PM
Post by: DropLogic on September 28, 2010, 08:40:33 PM
Firstly, we can assume that god is not omnipotent, and all powerful. The evidence would make that clear. I would thank god for doing the best that one can do. If god were responsible for bestowing upon us the moral core, only corruptible by other humans, I would thank god for that as well. The idea of god could be catalytic if only the followers of god agreed with each other, and practiced what they preached. I would cry for god as well, because god's plan had not panned out as god had hoped.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Asmodean on September 28, 2010, 10:55:06 PM
Post by: Asmodean on September 28, 2010, 10:55:06 PM
Ooh! Ooh! How about challenging god to get into the bottle..? Like that thing with a djinn or whatsitcalled! 
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: GAYtheist on September 29, 2010, 12:40:27 AM
Post by: GAYtheist on September 29, 2010, 12:40:27 AM
"The fuck is wrong with you?!"
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Byronazriel on September 29, 2010, 01:02:22 AM
Post by: Byronazriel on September 29, 2010, 01:02:22 AM
Oi, fancy a shag? 
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Ulver on March 18, 2011, 03:07:51 PM
Post by: Ulver on March 18, 2011, 03:07:51 PM
I would likely not ask anything, because I am nearly certain the response would always be:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimage.spreadshirt.com%2Fimage-server%2Fimage%2Fcomposition%2F17170635%2Fview%2F1%2Fproducttypecolor%2F1%2Ftype%2Fpng%2Fwidth%2F378%2Fheight%2F378%2Ftroll-face_design.png&hash=48da30886f83c9950537ce847385497d541ac668)
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimage.spreadshirt.com%2Fimage-server%2Fimage%2Fcomposition%2F17170635%2Fview%2F1%2Fproducttypecolor%2F1%2Ftype%2Fpng%2Fwidth%2F378%2Fheight%2F378%2Ftroll-face_design.png&hash=48da30886f83c9950537ce847385497d541ac668)
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 18, 2011, 05:24:17 PM
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 18, 2011, 05:24:17 PM
I would ask the god of the bible: Are you sure you're not the devil?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: fester30 on March 18, 2011, 06:37:20 PM
Post by: fester30 on March 18, 2011, 06:37:20 PM
I would ask God two things (if permitted)...
Time to settle it once and for all... who killed JFK and was there anyone else involved?
What do they really do at Area 51?
Time to settle it once and for all... who killed JFK and was there anyone else involved?
What do they really do at Area 51?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: JuggernautJon on March 19, 2011, 06:53:06 PM
Post by: JuggernautJon on March 19, 2011, 06:53:06 PM
Dear baby jeebus,
Could you possibly chill out with the whole "family forcing religion on me" thing. They are telling me that I'm not an atheist, and that I do believe in you. But I don't. I want nothing to do with a "higher power" that dictates my wearing of hats or not.
Could you possibly chill out with the whole "family forcing religion on me" thing. They are telling me that I'm not an atheist, and that I do believe in you. But I don't. I want nothing to do with a "higher power" that dictates my wearing of hats or not.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Twentythree on March 22, 2011, 04:29:10 PM
Post by: Twentythree on March 22, 2011, 04:29:10 PM
The chicken or the egg?
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Sireal on March 26, 2011, 06:41:50 PM
Post by: Sireal on March 26, 2011, 06:41:50 PM
I woudn't ask him nothing, I'd tell him-the free lunch is over dude-piss off, I'm running my own show.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Melmoth on March 26, 2011, 07:01:39 PM
Post by: Melmoth on March 26, 2011, 07:01:39 PM
Quote from: "Sireal"I woudn't ask him nothing, I'd tell him-the free lunch is over dude-piss off, I'm running my own show.
Me like. Now I have to say something else, to be original.
I'd ask, "If we didn't exist, what would be the point of you?"
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 27, 2011, 06:50:38 AM
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 27, 2011, 06:50:38 AM
Quote from: "Melmoth"I'd ask, "If we didn't exist, what would be the point of you?"
Assuming we are the only living things capable of worshipping, that's a brilliant question, actually.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: YaarghMatey487 on March 27, 2011, 08:31:17 AM
Post by: YaarghMatey487 on March 27, 2011, 08:31:17 AM
Quote from: "TheWilliam"I'd ask............
May I have $357.22?
How do I download songs from myspace?
Will you help Debra Messing fill out her shirts better?
Will there ever be a movie with Macaulay Culkin playing opposite Ryan Phillipe?
Are you going to deliver Debra Messing to my house after you make her fill out her shirts better?
if not then fuck off.
Hahahahaaha that was excellent. Personally I'd ask him for a perfect bubble tea recipe... I can never find the right tapioca beads.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: JoeBobSmith on March 27, 2011, 09:43:16 AM
Post by: JoeBobSmith on March 27, 2011, 09:43:16 AM
I'd just ask
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: Melmoth on March 28, 2011, 09:10:50 AM
Post by: Melmoth on March 28, 2011, 09:10:50 AM
Quote from: "xSilverPhinx"Quote from: "Melmoth"I'd ask, "If we didn't exist, what would be the point of you?"Assuming we are the only living things capable of worshipping, that's a brilliant question, actually.
Truthfully, I don't think there would be much point to him even with us around. 'To be worshipped' is a fairly flimsy reason for existing, especially when mankind's sole purpose is apparently 'to worship him'. It's a small, two-part circular system, with nothing external to qualify it... seems like kind of a short-circuit as far as meaning goes.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: danny boy on April 08, 2011, 03:56:19 AM
Post by: danny boy on April 08, 2011, 03:56:19 AM
I'd definitely ask him why the hell he created Jersey Shore.
On a more serious note, I'd ask him why he made humans so greedy (which is an inherently silly thing to ask because it's clearly due to evolution and not God).
On a more serious note, I'd ask him why he made humans so greedy (which is an inherently silly thing to ask because it's clearly due to evolution and not God).
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: DeterminedJuliet on April 09, 2011, 01:29:28 AM
Post by: DeterminedJuliet on April 09, 2011, 01:29:28 AM
What's up with all of the misogyny in your religious texts? Seriously, us women can be cool. I make a mean shadow puppet.
Title: Re: If you could ask god anything..
Post by: curiosityandthecat on April 09, 2011, 01:46:08 AM
Post by: curiosityandthecat on April 09, 2011, 01:46:08 AM
Quote from: "Ulver"I would likely not ask anything, because I am nearly certain the response would always be:
[trollface]
Exactly.
But, in the spirit of conversing with fictional characters, I think my question would be simple "WTF?"