Happy Atheist Forum

Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Quote from: "godistruth"Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Well I don't know, what are you offering?
The Giant Rubber Duck promises to lead me over the hills and far away.
We will spend eternity in a nice bubbly bath that never goes cold.
Can Christianity compete with this?

Yes, I don't know about you but I have been promised a trip to Sugar Candy Mountain!

Is it bad that the only time I come close to talking to god is when people post stuff like this and I think "Oh lord :D

Quote from: "Whitney"Is it bad that the only time I come close to talking to god is when people post stuff like this and I think "Oh lord :D

Oh come on, this one isn't so bad.
He doesn't seem to be gloating over our imminent roasting.
He sounds like a genuinely concerned ten year old.

I pity you for not appreciating the glory and wonder of seeking to understand the universe.  I really do.  God-concepts are so utterly banal compared to the majesty that we have come even slightly to understand about the universe.

I was going to post a witty Voltaire quote, but then I decided to just come out and say it.

Your god isn't real. Your fear of hell is irrational. The church is lying to you.

I think I've covered it

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Why have you not offered yourself to the true god, the god of metal:

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi49.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ff295%2Fhammer-down1%2Fdio2.jpg&hash=23a11e67c8bac4323c4084885a2cbf347ea24b13)

Quote from: "godistruth"Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Where do I sign up? What do I do? I'm so...conflicted. Can you help me...please?

:D

I was going to join Christianity but then I just went about living my life.

Quote from: "Sophus"Yes, I don't know about you but I have been promised a trip to Sugar Candy Mountain!

It's a magical leoplurodon, Chaaaaarlie!

There is no god other than Cthulhu and Tom Cruise is his profet.

You are on the wrong path, my dear preachy newb.  

I pity the fool who don't eat modammas.

Quote from: "godistruth"We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Noone has ever said we came from monkies, just that we have a common ancestor.
There is more evidence for the theory of the big bang than creation...and the bible is full of so many wholes it's laughable, at best.
I must do nothing. And, according to the bible, we are in Hell...seeing as Lucifer was banished to Earth, not some fantasical lair under Earth's crust.
Oh, and I refuse to join any organization that constantly tells me that me loving me gay partner is not only a bad thing, but also worth of burning and being tortured for all of eternity. These are my opinions...

Quote from: "godistruth"You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

To be honest, my idea of "hell" would consist of being sentenced to an eternity in heaven having to listen to religious drivel.

Quote from: "GAYtheist"Noone has ever said we came from monkies, just that we have a common ancestor.

However, it is possible a few of us came from The Monkees, those guys got around.

Do we have the "I pity the fool"-smiley..? If not, I think we need.  

Quote from: "The Magic Pudding"Well I don't know, what are you offering?
The Giant Rubber Duck promises to lead me over the hills and far away.
We will spend eternity in a nice bubbly bath that never goes cold.
Can Christianity compete with this?

Led Zeppelin reference!

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!

I invite you to expand your mind.

Quote from: "godistruth"The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.

Well, it's not like anyone's never been lied to by a priest before.

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
So believing in any god is just as good as believing in your god?

Why would you deny your creator?
Sometimes she makes unreasonable demands and then I need to tell her that it can't be done.

the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
Who?

We did'nt come from monkeys.
This statement is 100% true. However we do share a common ancestor.

The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
The Bible is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying reality.

You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Don't worry, it's all a translation error.

Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity
Brothers and sisters? Oh, I guess if you take Genesis literally...

Quote from: "Har"Brothers and sisters? Oh, I guess if you take Genesis literally... :raised:

Quote from: "Asmodean"

Quote from: "Har"Brothers and sisters? Oh, I guess if you take Genesis literally... :raised:

Also, if Eve was made from Adams rib... then wasn't Adam screwing himself?

Quote from: "Davin"

Quote from: "Asmodean"

Quote from: "Har"Brothers and sisters? Oh, I guess if you take Genesis literally... :raised:

Also, if Eve was made from Adams rib... then wasn't Adam screwing himself?

Subsistence existence at its finest!

Well, if Adam and Eve sired all of humanity, why is inbreeding detrimental?

Quote from: "PoopShoot"Well, if Adam and Eve sired all of humanity, why is inbreeding detrimental?

The fundies have a range of answers to choose from:

God works in mysterious ways.
Only He can know all the answers.
and, my personal favorite,
DNA wasn't invented yet!

Quote from: "Sophus"DNA wasn't invented yet!

That reminds me of a quote I once saw on fundies say the darndest things:
DNA means deoxyribonucleic ACID.  If that stuff was real and inside you, you'd be dead.

...I aaaaammmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeellllllllllltttttttttttinnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggg

or


Not

Quote from: "Squid"Why have you not offered yourself to the true god, the god of metal:

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi49.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ff295%2Fhammer-down1%2Fdio2.jpg&hash=23a11e67c8bac4323c4084885a2cbf347ea24b13)

Is that Dio?

Quote from: "Draconicstarz88"Is that Dio?

[youtube:3h9bz42x]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvvjiE4AdUI[/youtube:3h9bz42x]

Quote from: "PoopShoot"

Quote from: "Sophus"DNA wasn't invented yet!

That reminds me of a quote I once saw on fundies say the darndest things:
DNA means deoxyribonucleic ACID.  If that stuff was real and inside you, you'd be dead.

Sad thing is that most fundamentalists are truly ignorant of science and how the scientific process works - and are encouraged to stay that way by their pastors and other church leadership.  

As I left christianty behind and started reading about what evolution really was and about science in general really was, I was amazed.  Everything I was told was just plain wrong.  godistruth, I hope you open your mind to the possibility that you are wrong and try to learn what science actually is.

When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

Quote from: "Will"When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

If I came across that way, it was not my intent.  I was only speaking from my own experience as a former fundamentalist christian.

Quote from: "PoopShoot"

Quote from: "Draconicstarz88"Is that Dio?

[youtube:1rf9ota7]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvvjiE4AdUI[/youtube:1rf9ota7]

Wow, that kid looks a lot like Jack Black.

Quote from: "Draconicstarz88"Is that Dio?

Indeed.

Quote from: "Will"When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

Wouldn't work as a general rule though, now would it..? "Talk like to mother", that is... Too dependent on how different people talk to their mothers

Quote from: "Asmodean"

Quote from: "Will"When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

Wouldn't work as a general rule though, now would it..? "Talk like to mother", that is... Too dependent on how different people talk to their mothers

Correct. How would talking to them as if they were dead help  

I get Will's point though. Shouting at a troll is exactly what they want and exactly what you don't want.

Quote from: "PoopShoot"

Quote from: "Draconicstarz88"Is that Dio?

[youtube:1l588z7i]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvvjiE4AdUI[/youtube:1l588z7i]

Best scene in the movie.

Quote from: "Tank"Shouting at a troll is exactly what they want and exactly what you don't want.

Which is exactly wht I wouldn't want to talk to them like they were my mother, even though I don't shout - I just know which levers to press for maximum effect.  

Quote from: "Asmodean"

Quote from: "Will"When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

Wouldn't work as a general rule though, now would it..? "Talk like to mother", that is... Too dependent on how different people talk to their mothers

Will is a nice guy. I'm sure he talks to his mother in a very nice way.

Quote from: "Velma"

Quote from: "Will"When dealing with trolls, I find it's best to speak with them as if they're my mother. I speak with respect while still getting whatever point across in a straightforward way with a minimum of snark.

If I came across that way, it was not my intent.  I was only speaking from my own experience as a former fundamentalist christian.

I don't think he was referring to you Velma.  

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!

Ok, I believe in Lancor, the god of chocolate brownies.... in fact I think I'll go worship him now... yum

Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.

I don't deny my Mother and Father, do you?

We did'nt come from monkeys.

Apparently, you have never been to one of my family reunions.

The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.

No, the big bang was an orgy I heard about when I was in college; I didn't go because I was busy worshiping god.  Damn it, now you know why I'm an atheist now.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!

Too late, I was married to Satan for 20 years, I did my time in hell.  Your god don't scare me none, you want to see hell, I'll give you her number.

Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

Join them for what, are we going on a picnic?  How about a march for equal rights for homosexuals, I'll join you for that.  But you said you didn't care if we believed in the Christian god, you just said A god... How about Zeus, he sounds like a good one, or any of the other tens of thousands of gods.. tell you what, YOU pick one, just not your boring old Christian god, he reeks.

Quote from: "karadan"Will is a nice guy. I'm sure he talks to his mother in a very nice way. :hmm: Why is everyone suddenly nice?!

Oh... Mac is banned..!  

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

*sigh*
misconceptions, misconceptions, misconceptions. Two possiblilities: 1) Troll 2) Ignorant ramble

Quote from: "godistruth"Not believing in the Christian god is one thing, but not believing in any god is beyond my mind!
Why would you deny your creator? the one being that brought life and happiness into this world.
We did'nt come from monkeys.
The big bang is just a mythical story that you poor souls tell yourselves to keep denying god.
You must accept god! please...I do not want anyone to go to hell!
Please, my brothers and sisters, Join Christianity!

I am begining to find comments like this offensive.

I have never seen god doing anything "good". Name one good thing and I'll tell you a million things he hasn't done.

if god existed, he has brought only pain, death, hate, seperation of the human race, war, starvation, greed. If you think this is becauseof people your wrong, dead wrong. He created us, hes the one who fucked up. What god puts the blame of his mistake on us? he kills innocent babies, children, men and women. he brings you to the brink of your humanity just to end it with nothing but to worship a jealous greedy god.

Do have a son or daughter? maybe someone that feels like a child (which is almost nothing) maybe a baby brother or sister youtake care of like a father? Now this person, is the most amazing thing I have ever known, I would give my life for him, no matter what he would say to me, no matter what he ever did to me I would spend eternity in hell for him. I would sell my soul to the devil to keep him from feeling one ounce of pain. And you say god loves us more than that? yet he'd let us fall from him, burn forever without him?

Open your eyes and get out of your bubble. See the real truth, the truth you can see/feel/touch. I hope you get out from your shell my friend. I really hope you do.

Well, those are wild guesses.