Happy Atheist Forum

Okay so I know Immigration is a hot topic. I have a few really hardcore red-state friends who love sending e-mails like people used to about 7 years ago. (I figured this would be under current events)

I got this little gem from one guy who insists that we are a nation founded on Christian values.

QuoteLET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS RIGHT.
IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.
IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.
IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET

    * A JOB,
    * A DRIVERS LICENSE,
    * SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
    * WELFARE,
    * FOOD STAMPS,
    * CREDIT CARDS,
    * SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
    * FREE EDUCATION,
    * FREE HEALTH CARE,
    * A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON
    * BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE
    * THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY’S FLAG WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU DON’T GET ENOUGH RESPECT
    * AND YOU CAN VOTE DEMOCRAT.

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON THE SITUATION…

It tickled me a little seeing as I have a parent who is an immigrant (She also has a Masters and speaks English fluently to the point that you'd think she's a native citizen) and friends who have immigrated here who all could run vast circles around these folks who get off to these stupid e-mails.

So I wrote a counter one, what do you guys think? Any suggestions?

QuoteLET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS RIGHT.

IF YOU LIVE IN NORTH KOREA YOU GET SENT TO GULAGS FOR SHOWING ANY KIND OF DISAGREEMENT WITH YOUR GOVERNMENT. TORTURE, RAPE, ABYSMAL LABOR CONDITIONS, AND A PAINFUL DEATH AWAIT.

IF YOU LIVE IN IRAN YOU WILL GET STONED TO DEATH FOR HAVING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE. TEEN GIRLS WILL BE HUNG.

IF YOU LIVE IN AFGHANISTAN YOU MUST COVER UP EVERYTHING ON YOU IF YOU’RE A WOMAN. BECAUSE IT’S YOUR FAULT THAT MEN LOOK AT YOU LUSTFULLY, YOU WHORE.

IF YOU LIVE IN SAUDI ARABIA YOU WILL BE FLOGGED BY THE POLICE OF VICE AND VIRTUE IF YOU ENJOY WESTERN MUSIC IN PUBLIC. WOMEN MUST ROUTINELY SUFFER OTHER ABUSES BY THESE “OFFICERS”.

IF YOU LIVE IN CHINA YOU ARE TOLD WHERE, WHEN, HOW, AND WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO WORK. OFTEN BEING PAID WAGES THAT WOULDN’T FLY 40 YEARS AGO IN THE USA.

IF YOU LIVE IN VENEZUELA YOU CAN LOSE YOUR LAND TO THE GOVERNMENT AND HAVE IT REDISTRIBUTED TO MARXISTS SYMPATHIZERS. MERELY IF YOU ARE SUCCESSFUL AT YOUR JOB AND HAVE TURNED A TIDY PROFIT.

IF YOU LIVE IN CUBA YOU ARE WATCHED ON EVERY STREET CORNER BY MEMBERS OF THE POLICE WHO WATCH FOR ANYONE REMOTELY DISSENTING AGAINST FIDEL. ANY REMOTE SIGN OF THIS LANDS YOU IN A LOCKER FOR MANY YEARS.

BUT IF YOU LIVE IN THE U.S. YOU HAVE THE FREEDOM TO FORWARD RETARDED FUCKING E-MAILS IN ALL CAPS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE FLEEING HORRIBLE DICTATORSHIPS LIKE THESE ARE WORKING FOR BELOW MINIMUM WAGE AND IN SUBPAR CONDITIONS HAVE THE AUDACITY TO PROTEST THE UNFAIR TREATMENT IN THEIR NEW COUNTRY. OH AND YOU IGNORE HOW YOUR ANCESTORS WENT AROUND RAPING AND ROBBING OTHERS OF THEIR LAND BECAUSE THEY HAD “GOD” ON THEIR SIDE. IT’S OKAY WHEN THEY DID IT, RIGHT?

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON YOUR SILLY FANTASY WORLD VIEW.

That was brilliant ^_^ Thank you so much for sharing that. I really enjoyed reading your version.

+1, nice reply, let us know if you get one back.

I haven't sent one off yet. I'm still tweaking it.

I'm not trying to be a dead white guy basher. I just get sick and tired of hearing people who live like kings compared to the rest of the world complaining when someone cashes in on a small amount of social services. Some of it also seems to border on racism.

I also just find it annoying the same people who do this are the ones who scare politicians to adopt such nonsense as putting disclaimers about evolution in biology textbooks, banning gays from having the same rights as you and me, and other things merely because of their irrational views/fears.

This kind of nonsense makes me an advocate for a voter aptitude test. I honestly think people who are ignorant/dumb shouldn't vote alongside folks who are actually capable of intelligent thought/discourse.

:yay:    Nice response!

Nice!

In my country, you get free money from the state, free health care, free roof and a bunch of other freebies if you enter illegally. I must say that annoys me - I have nothing against those coming here for asylum or work, but we have enough of our own to take care of without looking out for fortune seekers.

Pow!! That's a brilliant response!

Quote from: "Asmodean"In my country, you get free money from the state, free health care, free roof and a bunch of other freebies if you enter illegally. {snip}

I thought they just got deported?  

Quote from: "Big Mac"BUT IF YOU LIVE IN THE U.S. YOU HAVE THE FREEDOM TO FORWARD RETARDED FUCKING E-MAILS IN ALL CAPS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE FLEEING HORRIBLE DICTATORSHIPS LIKE THESE ARE WORKING FOR BELOW MINIMUM WAGE AND IN SUBPAR CONDITIONS HAVE THE AUDACITY TO PROTEST THE UNFAIR TREATMENT IN THEIR NEW COUNTRY. OH AND YOU IGNORE HOW YOUR ANCESTORS WENT AROUND RAPING AND ROBBING OTHERS OF THEIR LAND BECAUSE THEY HAD “GOD” ON THEIR SIDE. IT’S OKAY WHEN THEY DID IT, RIGHT?

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON YOUR SILLY FANTASY WORLD VIEW.

I'd put this in a bright red text in a slightly larger font.  And maybe insert the image of that Arizona senator behind the new immigration law where he's marching with Neo-Nazis

Oh, and yes, I've gotten a very similar email.  Fucking chain letter propaganda sending twerps.

Quote from: "Kylyssa"

Quote from: "Big Mac"BUT IF YOU LIVE IN THE U.S. YOU HAVE THE FREEDOM TO FORWARD RETARDED FUCKING E-MAILS IN ALL CAPS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE FLEEING HORRIBLE DICTATORSHIPS LIKE THESE ARE WORKING FOR BELOW MINIMUM WAGE AND IN SUBPAR CONDITIONS HAVE THE AUDACITY TO PROTEST THE UNFAIR TREATMENT IN THEIR NEW COUNTRY. OH AND YOU IGNORE HOW YOUR ANCESTORS WENT AROUND RAPING AND ROBBING OTHERS OF THEIR LAND BECAUSE THEY HAD “GOD” ON THEIR SIDE. IT’S OKAY WHEN THEY DID IT, RIGHT?

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON YOUR SILLY FANTASY WORLD VIEW.

I'd put this in a bright red text in a slightly larger font.

Flashing bright red large fonts are even better.

Heh, that was awesome.

Iran really isn't that bad, though. Two thirds of the country want to join the western world.

Quote from: "karadan"Heh, that was awesome.

Iran really isn't that bad, though. Two thirds of the country want to join the western world.

Oh I wasn't knocking the Iranians. I know a few and they are nice folks on the whole. I'm knocking the insane government that has an iron grip on them. Governments make some countries ugly. Not the other way around in my opinion.

The few Iranians I have met in the UK refer to themselves as Persians.

Quote from: "Big Mac"

Quote from: "karadan"Heh, that was awesome.

Iran really isn't that bad, though. Two thirds of the country want to join the western world.

Oh I wasn't knocking the Iranians. I know a few and they are nice folks on the whole. I'm knocking the insane government that has an iron grip on them. Governments make some countries ugly. Not the other way around in my opinion.

Yeah i know. It is just a shame that people like Ahmadinejad 'are' the country, or at least its identity in the eyes of other nations. He couldn't be more misrepresentative of the people he is in charge of (barring a few ultra right-wing nutjobs).

Anyone know any folks from Israel? I knew the situation in Iran a while ago but the only person i've ever talked to is 16 years old, uber religious and thinks rascism is ok. If he's the face of the Israeli youth then I fear for that country and sadly it's America's fault the country is like that in the first place or rather some of our own stupid ultra right wing nut jobs.

Quote from: "Ultima22689"Anyone know any folks from Israel? I knew the situation in Iran a while ago but the only person i've ever talked to is 16 years old, uber religious and thinks rascism is ok. If he's the face of the Israeli youth then I fear for that country and sadly it's America's fault the country is like that in the first place or rather some of our own stupid ultra right wing nut jobs.

I have met a few Israelis on line and there isn't a lot difference between them and any other atheists, but the religious ones are also right across the spectrum from supporting a secular society in Israel to driving every non-jew off of the holy land. This guy is not typical in my limited experience.

Awesome response.  I'll be curious to see what, if anything, the other party has to say about it.

Quote from: "Ultima22689"Anyone know any folks from Israel? I knew the situation in Iran a while ago but the only person i've ever talked to is 16 years old, uber religious and thinks rascism is ok. If he's the face of the Israeli youth then I fear for that country and sadly it's America's fault the country is like that in the first place or rather some of our own stupid ultra right wing nut jobs.

Depends. A lot of the ones I know (I used to work as mall security so I got to be friends with the merchants from Greece, Israel, Turkey, and Iran to name a few) tend to just want the fighting and hostility shit to end. I think it's just tiring for them to have bloodshed over ancient and ludicrous feuds that began with people whose great great great grandchildren have been dead for centuries. IDF vets (every israeli I knew) tend to have a calmer view about issues then the ones who haven't served. Some I knew suffered from PTSD badly. One guy was just plain nutty to the point the other Israelis were scared of him. Israelis don't scare easily (though one told me that most people in that part of the world are scared of Russians, basically he said NO ONE fucks with Russians because they tend to be pretty bad on retaliations.) so that's a bad sign.

Frankly I think we see a distorted view. I imagine most are tired of violence and bloodshed for such pointless reasons. The problem is the machismo attitude of righting all perceived wrongs. Once again religion makes such a "wonderful" thing.

Man, Israeli girls tend to be pretty damn hot though. One of the few women I can talk to great lengths about the preference of the M16 variations. I knew one that was half-Moroccan so I imagine Israeli is more diverse than we imagine.

One thing I loved was all of them hated the A&F folks as much (if not more so) as I did. Punks who think they are so much better than other folks.  I learned a few curse words in Hebrew. It was hilarious.

tl;dr is basically they're people like you and me. Most of them just want to go on with their lives without the headache of violence and hate.

Quote from: "Big Mac"

Quote from: "Ultima22689"Anyone know any folks from Israel? I knew the situation in Iran a while ago but the only person i've ever talked to is 16 years old, uber religious and thinks rascism is ok. If he's the face of the Israeli youth then I fear for that country and sadly it's America's fault the country is like that in the first place or rather some of our own stupid ultra right wing nut jobs.

Depends. A lot of the ones I know (I used to work as mall security so I got to be friends with the merchants from Greece, Israel, Turkey, and Iran to name a few) tend to just want the fighting and hostility shit to end. I think it's just tiring for them to have bloodshed over ancient and ludicrous feuds that began with people whose great great great grandchildren have been dead for centuries. IDF vets (every israeli I knew) tend to have a calmer view about issues then the ones who haven't served. Some I knew suffered from PTSD badly. One guy was just plain nutty to the point the other Israelis were scared of him. Israelis don't scare easily (though one told me that most people in that part of the world are scared of Russians, basically he said NO ONE fucks with Russians because they tend to be pretty bad on retaliations.) so that's a bad sign.

Frankly I think we see a distorted view. I imagine most are tired of violence and bloodshed for such pointless reasons. The problem is the machismo attitude of righting all perceived wrongs. Once again religion makes such a "wonderful" thing.

Man, Israeli girls tend to be pretty damn hot though. One of the few women I can talk to great lengths about the preference of the M16 variations. I knew one that was half-Moroccan so I imagine Israeli is more diverse than we imagine.

One thing I loved was all of them hated the A&F folks as much (if not more so) as I did. Punks who think they are so much better than other folks.  I learned a few curse words in Hebrew. It was hilarious.

tl;dr is basically they're people like you and me. Most of them just want to go on with their lives without the headache of violence and hate.

That's what I hoped and figured.  Thanks for the info, I hope all that senseless violence does end soon and all these fucked up nations have revolutions or something soon so they get on track with the rest of the free world.  What's it take for those people to get to the point where they will revolt? When I look back at history all around the world there were many a revolt against real tyranny but now today it seems people pretend there is tyranny and there are others who live in places that are actually messed up but don't seem to get mad enough to rebel. I guess it isn't the same anymore. It's not just about numbers. Governments typically have access to equipment that civilians could never get their hands on and in some form are able to send out massive amounts of propaganda.