Title: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on September 21, 2009, 04:31:28 AM
Post by: Godless on September 21, 2009, 04:31:28 AM
I had to write about a "critical situation," which is pretty much a situation I have a stake in. I have to address it from as many angles as possible and have to present the specifics of the topic. I decided to write about Atheism in America. I'll be honest, I'm not a very good writer at all and English is probably my worst subject. But I could still use some feedback from you guys on my paper. It's pretty long so you could just skim it or read parts of it. The numbers in the paper are for the endnotes which are at the bottom.
*might repost my paper later - see post below for why*
*might repost my paper later - see post below for why*
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: iNow on September 21, 2009, 06:12:13 AM
Post by: iNow on September 21, 2009, 06:12:13 AM
I'm usually a rather harsh critic of the writings put forth by other people, but overall this is a very solid piece. Quite well done. I have no idea how your teacher will react, nor any idea of how well it fits into the assignment, but you've done a great job hitting all of the major areas. Only one thing I would add... In your paragraph about stem cells... You can drive that point home a bit more by suggesting that their beliefs are contradictory and internally inconsistent... That apparently life itself is so sacred that murder is okay. It just doesn't make sense, and might be worth pointing out. Alternatively, you could mention how many people like juvenile diabetics are going to die because they'd rather protect stem cells than people.
Either way, though... Nice paper. I hope you score a good grade on it. The amount of thought and consideration you put into it is plainly obvious, and I enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing.
Either way, though... Nice paper. I hope you score a good grade on it. The amount of thought and consideration you put into it is plainly obvious, and I enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on September 21, 2009, 06:32:55 AM
Post by: Godless on September 21, 2009, 06:32:55 AM
Thank you. Do you think it sounds too one sided though? Because I'm not supposed to necessarily provide an argument/information solely from the atheist stance.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Will on September 21, 2009, 08:08:57 AM
Post by: Will on September 21, 2009, 08:08:57 AM
I can't really speak to grammar and syntax as I made a point of forgetting everything I've ever learned in an english class out of spite, but the topic and your exploration seem quite good.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Whitney on September 21, 2009, 01:40:13 PM
Post by: Whitney on September 21, 2009, 01:40:13 PM
I'll read it later tonight when I get home from work.
That's like me with French.
Quote from: "Will"I can't really speak to grammar and syntax as I made a point of forgetting everything I've ever learned in an english class out of spite,
That's like me with French.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Reginus on September 21, 2009, 10:16:44 PM
Post by: Reginus on September 21, 2009, 10:16:44 PM
Heh trying to learn a new language is like mentally slitting your wrists.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Renegnicat on September 30, 2009, 10:25:57 PM
Post by: Renegnicat on September 30, 2009, 10:25:57 PM
Es ist wie geistig Schlitzen meine Handgelenke? Nein! Es ist wie immer ein mit einem leistungsstarken Viking! 
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 04, 2009, 06:11:09 PM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 04, 2009, 06:11:09 PM
Quote from: "Godless"I had to write about a "critical situation," which is pretty much a situation I have a stake in. I have to address it from as many angles as possible and have to present the specifics of the topic. I decided to write about Atheism in America. I'll be honest, I'm not a very good writer at all and English is probably my worst subject. But I could still use some feedback from you guys on my paper. It's pretty long so you could just skim it or read parts of it. The numbers in the paper are for the endnotes which are at the bottom.
Atheism in America
etc...
I would be careful if you use TurnItIn.org. It'll come up as 100% plagiarized!
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on October 04, 2009, 06:44:34 PM
Post by: Godless on October 04, 2009, 06:44:34 PM
Quote from: "nikkmichalski"Quote from: "Godless"I had to write about a "critical situation," which is pretty much a situation I have a stake in. I have to address it from as many angles as possible and have to present the specifics of the topic. I decided to write about Atheism in America. I'll be honest, I'm not a very good writer at all and English is probably my worst subject. But I could still use some feedback from you guys on my paper. It's pretty long so you could just skim it or read parts of it. The numbers in the paper are for the endnotes which are at the bottom.
Atheism in America
etc...
I would be careful if you use TurnItIn.org. It'll come up as 100% plagiarized!
Actually good point... I'm gonna remove it for now because I already turned it in. I'll put it back up if my teacher offers me the option of a rewrite if I don't get a good grade.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 05, 2009, 08:24:34 PM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 05, 2009, 08:24:34 PM
Quote from: "Renegnicat"Es ist wie geistig Schlitzen meine Handgelenke? Nein! Es ist wie immer ein mit einem leistungsstarken Viking!
Damn me and my poor memory for German. All I know are "Entschuldigen Sie" and Industrial Metal lyrics.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on October 09, 2009, 04:46:44 AM
Post by: Godless on October 09, 2009, 04:46:44 AM
I got my paper back yesterday and I got an A! I didn't think my teacher was gonna like it that much but I guess I underestimate myself too much sometimes.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: MommaSquid on October 09, 2009, 10:07:21 PM
Post by: MommaSquid on October 09, 2009, 10:07:21 PM
QuoteNeed Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Grammatical error in the title of a thread regarding an English paper...does anyone else find this humorously ironic?
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 10, 2009, 12:23:04 AM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 10, 2009, 12:23:04 AM
Quote from: "MommaSquid"QuoteNeed Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Grammatical error in the title of a thread regarding an English paper...does anyone else find this humorously ironic?
I believe that sentence is grammatically correct.
"Need Your Guys''"
It's plural possessive. Plural means "s", and possessive means apostrophe AFTER the "s" (when plural).
And Godless: Congrats on the "A"!
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: AlP on October 10, 2009, 12:50:23 AM
Post by: AlP on October 10, 2009, 12:50:23 AM
Quote from: "nikkmichalski"I think it should be:Quote from: "MommaSquid"QuoteNeed Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Grammatical error in the title of a thread regarding an English paper...does anyone else find this humorously ironic?
I believe that sentence is grammatically correct.
"Need Your Guys''"
It's plural possessive. Plural means "s", and possessive means apostrophe AFTER the "s" (when plural).
And Godless: Congrats on the "A"!
Need You Guys'
=)
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 10, 2009, 09:33:56 PM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 10, 2009, 09:33:56 PM
Hmmm...maybe it should. I'm not sure. We need an English Teacher to intervene here!
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Renegnicat on October 12, 2009, 04:21:56 PM
Post by: Renegnicat on October 12, 2009, 04:21:56 PM
Both are incorrect. The phrase, "you guys" and "your guys" are both colloqial english.
The correct form of the sentence is:
Need your opinions on my english paper.
The correct form of the sentence is:
Need your opinions on my english paper.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Reginus on October 12, 2009, 11:09:20 PM
Post by: Reginus on October 12, 2009, 11:09:20 PM
Quote from: "Renegnicat"Both are incorrect. The phrase, "you guys" and "your guys" are both colloqial english.
The correct form of the sentence is:
Need your opinions on my english paper.
:drool
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 14, 2009, 03:26:48 AM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 14, 2009, 03:26:48 AM
Well since we're using "formal" English, is it enough to leave the "I" implied? (I) Need your etc...
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: AlP on October 14, 2009, 03:30:22 AM
Post by: AlP on October 14, 2009, 03:30:22 AM
Ah but it shouldn't be "need". Nobody needs opinions on an English paper. Maybe it should be:
"I want your opinions on my English paper"
or
"I would like your opinions on my English paper"
"I want your opinions on my English paper"
or
"I would like your opinions on my English paper"
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 15, 2009, 08:15:19 PM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 15, 2009, 08:15:19 PM
"Would you guys please help me with my English Paper?"
I'm just splitting hairs now.
I'm just splitting hairs now.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: AlP on October 16, 2009, 02:10:50 AM
Post by: AlP on October 16, 2009, 02:10:50 AM
Hmm. My dictionary says it is common place to use "would you" to make a polite request. But literally, "would" is the past tense of "will". And since it's a request for people to do something in the future, I'm beginning to think "will" actually makes more literal sense:
"Will you guys please help me with my English Paper?"
Or how about:
"Please help me with my English paper."
"Will you guys please help me with my English Paper?"
Or how about:
"Please help me with my English paper."
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on October 16, 2009, 06:48:35 PM
Post by: Godless on October 16, 2009, 06:48:35 PM
:P
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 18, 2009, 12:24:43 AM
Post by: nikkmichalski on October 18, 2009, 12:24:43 AM
I agree.
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Renegnicat on October 18, 2009, 12:55:39 AM
Post by: Renegnicat on October 18, 2009, 12:55:39 AM
My god. What have I done?
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: AlP on October 18, 2009, 01:14:28 AM
Post by: AlP on October 18, 2009, 01:14:28 AM
I think the world needs a whole lot more anally retentive obsession over the grammatical correctness of sentences!
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Squid on October 18, 2009, 01:55:09 AM
Post by: Squid on October 18, 2009, 01:55:09 AM
Quote from: "Godless"I got my paper back yesterday and I got an A! I didn't think my teacher was gonna like it that much but I guess I underestimate myself too much sometimes.
Congrats....wanna write my thesis?
Title: Re: Need Your Guys' Opinion on my Paper for English
Post by: Godless on October 18, 2009, 08:04:47 AM
Post by: Godless on October 18, 2009, 08:04:47 AM
Quote from: "Squid"Quote from: "Godless"I got my paper back yesterday and I got an A! I didn't think my teacher was gonna like it that much but I guess I underestimate myself too much sometimes.
Congrats....wanna write my thesis? :P