Happy Atheist Forum

Religion => Religion => Topic started by: NearBr0ken on November 19, 2008, 06:28:05 AM

Title: Coming out
Post by: NearBr0ken on November 19, 2008, 06:28:05 AM
I'm in the process of revealing my atheism.  The hardest will be to my parents as I still live in their house (while I'm at college).  I'm telling them this weekend but some of my friends already know.  I see it like this:  I've got one life to live, and nobody else is going to live it for me.  It's my life and I'm going to be the one to live it.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Kyuuketsuki on November 19, 2008, 10:13:13 AM
Quote from: "NearBr0ken"I'm in the process of revealing my atheism.  The hardest will be to my parents as I still live in their house (while I'm at college).  I'm telling them this weekend but some of my friends already know.  I see it like this:  I've got one life to live, and nobody else is going to live it for me.  It's my life and I'm going to be the one to live it.

Absolutely ... if you want any advice I'm sure you'll get it here :)

Kyu
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: karadan on November 19, 2008, 01:48:35 PM
Quote from: "NearBr0ken"I'm in the process of revealing my atheism.  The hardest will be to my parents as I still live in their house (while I'm at college).  I'm telling them this weekend but some of my friends already know.  I see it like this:  I've got one life to live, and nobody else is going to live it for me.  It's my life and I'm going to be the one to live it.

Go you!!!

Good luck with it. I hope for your sake they don't react like this... (http://http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=P8Aq00yJSxo)
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: curiosityandthecat on November 19, 2008, 04:46:50 PM
Hold your ground, but if they go on the offensive, don't fan the flames.

Good luck. We're all here for you.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Arthur Dent on November 19, 2008, 05:54:19 PM
I find that most religious beliefs are nothing more than a blanket for peoples lack of knowledge. They don't understand how "life, the universe and everything" works, so they adhere to a simple explanation that whisks away the details, (generally whatever they were told when they were young).

For me, my biggest defense, and driving force towards atheism, is science itself. My parents believe in souls and creationism and several other things, but I know different, verifiable explanations for the voids that those concepts attempt to fill. By having that edge, that scientific objection, it puts you in a place of immunity to religious bigotry. Unfortunately for them, using such a defense will put them in the wrong, which can lead to isolation and even hostility, as I know all too well.  :unsure:
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: rlrose328 on November 19, 2008, 06:05:17 PM
Good for you!  Grab life by the b@lls and have fun with it.  I'll be thinking about you this weekend.  :)
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: PipeBox on November 19, 2008, 06:16:00 PM
Best of luck.  We're all on standby if you need support.   :D
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Asmodean on November 19, 2008, 07:06:06 PM
Quote from: "curiosityandthecat"Hold your ground, but if they go on the offensive, don't fan the flames.

Good luck. We're all here for you.
Fan them flames just a little. Not enough to risk being kicked out of the house or not innheriting The Cashâ,,¢, but just enough for the satisfaction factor  :beer: Live your life as YOU want to while you can live it.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Sophus on November 19, 2008, 08:23:12 PM
Best wishes to you!

From my experience those who are closest to you will battle with you the most. I would avoid any discussion of details with them no matter how much they want to. It's uneeded friction and it was the biggest mistake I made.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: NearBr0ken on November 19, 2008, 08:25:03 PM
Thanks for all your support.  I'm researching evolution and big bang theory like crazy, making sure to take note of all theistic arguments and their rebuttals.  It's a lot to take in, but I know I'm going to need it come this weekend.  Unfortunately, my parents don't have internet and it's Thanksgiving break, so I won't be able to update you all on their reaction for a week after I tell them.  

 :idea:   That in mind, I probably won't tell them until the week is over, just so things go smoother.  It all depends on the circumstances.  

On the plus side, I've learned a lot though.  As it turns out, irreducible complexity is total BS that is debunked by exaptation.  That was the one my dad always cornered me with.  The argument about blood clotting, the immune system, the pain reflex, etc.  The more I learn, the easier it is to recognize ignorance.  I'm reading "The Blind Watchmaker" by Richard Dawkins and "The End of Faith" by Sam Harris.  They are both wonderful books.  All of what I'm learning just makes so much sense.  In fact, I have more of an appreciation for biology, astronomy, chemistry, and a host of other subjects now that I know about them.  This weekend could be a rough one, but I won't let them dictate my life to me.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: curiosityandthecat on November 19, 2008, 08:48:47 PM
Pick up Cosmos by Carl Sagan, too. It's always helpful to be knowledgeable about the classics,  ;)
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Arthur Dent on November 19, 2008, 08:51:29 PM
Quote from: "curiosityandthecat"Pick up Cosmos by Carl Sagan, too. It's always helpful to be knowledgeable about the classics,  ;)

Cosmos and Carl Sagan in general are responsible for my falling out of religion and recent love of science.

http://sprword.com/videos/cosmos/ (http://sprword.com/videos/cosmos/)
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: NearBr0ken on November 26, 2008, 09:47:04 PM
Well, I told my dad since he's more open minded, but of course my mom eventually found out.  They recognize that I'm an adult even though they think I'm in error.  They expect me to respect their beliefs and keep quiet about mine as long as I'm at their house.  I understand that, which is why I'm getting a job closer to college and staying there most of the time.  It went better than expected, but not quite as well as I wanted it.  I presented my case clearly and concisely and made sure to point out logical fallacies he used (which there were many).  He even said that I shouldn't be asking him if God existed, I should be asking God....  :D
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: brekfustuvluzerz on December 12, 2008, 02:34:53 AM
same here about sagan and cosmos. he is my "savior"