Title: warning for kids against Atheists (funny)
Post by: susangail on March 23, 2008, 04:31:50 AM
Post by: susangail on March 23, 2008, 04:31:50 AM
I thought this was funny.....(hope someone hasn't already posted it...)
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Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 23, 2008, 05:05:31 AM
Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 23, 2008, 05:05:31 AM
I think the site that that is from is a complete joke. BIG one.
I saw it a few years back, has a bunch of shit about a lamb named 'lambuel' or somethin.
If it is the one I remember, they sell Jesus thongs!
I saw it a few years back, has a bunch of shit about a lamb named 'lambuel' or somethin.
If it is the one I remember, they sell Jesus thongs!
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Post by: susangail on March 23, 2008, 07:26:18 AM
Post by: susangail on March 23, 2008, 07:26:18 AM
Ha ha yeah I wasn't sure if the site was legit but I thought this was funny nonetheless. The church does make Atheists seem like horrible people that are angry and/or sad all the time. I used to think they were evil... Damn I am a hypocrite!
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Post by: ShimShamSam on March 23, 2008, 12:43:23 PM
Post by: ShimShamSam on March 23, 2008, 12:43:23 PM
Hilarious, but true, I am a crotchety old Mr.s Gruff, and I do lash out at children, and I am a grouch. But I enjoy my crotchety grouchiness.
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Post by: Mister Joy on March 24, 2008, 12:08:23 AM
Post by: Mister Joy on March 24, 2008, 12:08:23 AM
I think that the site that's from is, mercifully, satirical. I commend whoever made it, in fact. My favourite characters are probably Hopsiah the Kanga-Jew (great pun there) and Habu the Polytheistic Elephant ("I'm so confused! I don't know which one I'm supposed to worship!" and so on).
There are plenty of these 'atheist warnings' knocking around, though. This is a goodun:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi59.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fg297%2FJack_Joy%2Fhousemate_atheist.jpg&hash=e4a8c64ff72884c940d5bb84252b0b665d963ebd)
There are plenty of these 'atheist warnings' knocking around, though. This is a goodun:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi59.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fg297%2FJack_Joy%2Fhousemate_atheist.jpg&hash=e4a8c64ff72884c940d5bb84252b0b665d963ebd)
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Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 24, 2008, 01:13:09 AM
Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 24, 2008, 01:13:09 AM
.........whoops.........
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Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 24, 2008, 01:17:45 AM
Post by: tacoma_kyle on March 24, 2008, 01:17:45 AM
Haha, that photo looks like it was edited. The hand-looking stuff.
About damn time you get it! :badgrin:
Quote from: "susangail"Ha ha yeah I wasn't sure if the site was legit but I thought this was funny nonetheless. The church does make Atheists seem like horrible people that are angry and/or sad all the time. I used to think they were evil... Damn I am a hypocrite!
About damn time you get it! :badgrin:
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Post by: susangail on March 24, 2008, 05:20:42 AM
Post by: susangail on March 24, 2008, 05:20:42 AM
haha yeah I'm pretty slow...
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Post by: SteveS on March 24, 2008, 02:51:41 PM
Post by: SteveS on March 24, 2008, 02:51:41 PM
I like that Mr. Gruff off the Objective Ministries site --- I think you can buy T-shirts with that goat on them.
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Post by: ShimShamSam on March 24, 2008, 02:56:13 PM
Post by: ShimShamSam on March 24, 2008, 02:56:13 PM
i would pay good money to have that "Spiritual Safety Tip" about Mr. Gruff on a t-shirt. In the mean time I just got it on my MySpace
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Post by: ShimShamSam on March 24, 2008, 03:11:05 PM
Post by: ShimShamSam on March 24, 2008, 03:11:05 PM
Oh yeah Susan, and naturally they probably follow your coming out of the closet...so to speak, with the argument that there is no evidence that proves god doesn't exist. They always ask this, it never ails, it's like clockwork, or so the expression goes. Well, there's also no proof that bigfoot or aliens don't exist, should you also believe in those too?
To me the only difference between believing in god and believing in Santa is that people naturally grow out of believing in Santa.
To me the only difference between believing in god and believing in Santa is that people naturally grow out of believing in Santa.
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Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 06:55:36 PM
Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 06:55:36 PM
Unfortunately, that site is not satirical. I thought it HAD to be but it's not... it's real. And very scary.
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Post by: Mister Joy on April 08, 2008, 07:28:25 PM
Post by: Mister Joy on April 08, 2008, 07:28:25 PM
Are you SURE? Because 'accept Jesus, get a free PS2' or whatever all seems a bit much.
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Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 07:38:51 PM
Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 07:38:51 PM
No, not SURE sure... but there's too much on that site that IS serious for it to be a parody, don't you think? I spent a week examining every page of that site before I did a blog on it and there was just too much information all over it that is accurately fundie or gellie for it to be a parody or satire.
Though... hmmm... here is one of my favorite drawings from the kid's art section:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.croppincorner.com%2Flovejesus.jpg&hash=1e0805d95fbe19315553737303af6863d1da36b4)
That CAN'T be real, right? Most of the others seem genuine... but THIS one...
Crap... I don't know anymore.
Though... hmmm... here is one of my favorite drawings from the kid's art section:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.croppincorner.com%2Flovejesus.jpg&hash=1e0805d95fbe19315553737303af6863d1da36b4)
That CAN'T be real, right? Most of the others seem genuine... but THIS one...
Crap... I don't know anymore.
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Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 07:52:04 PM
Post by: rlrose328 on April 08, 2008, 07:52:04 PM
Okay, read the "Landover Baptist Church (http://objectiveministries.org/shutdown/)" pages and it seems real... then check out the Creation Science, Project Pterosaur (http://objectiveministries.org/creation/projectpterosaur.html) page and it HAS to be fake. UGH!
EDIT:
Okay... in the name of never letting a dead dog lie, I'm still researching this damned site. There was once a page on wiki about O:M but was removed for some reason:
http://www.answers.com/topic/objective-ministries
In the External Links, there's a link to O:M about the wiki page.
So... again... is it real? Or is it parody/satire? Wiki said satire. Or is it so underground satire that it won't admit it's satire? Many of the outside links and ads are for real Christian sites... but as the Wiki states, many of the orgs mentioned on the pages are not real.
EDIT:
Okay... in the name of never letting a dead dog lie, I'm still researching this damned site. There was once a page on wiki about O:M but was removed for some reason:
http://www.answers.com/topic/objective-ministries
In the External Links, there's a link to O:M about the wiki page.
So... again... is it real? Or is it parody/satire? Wiki said satire. Or is it so underground satire that it won't admit it's satire? Many of the outside links and ads are for real Christian sites... but as the Wiki states, many of the orgs mentioned on the pages are not real.
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Post by: Mister Joy on April 09, 2008, 01:28:32 AM
Post by: Mister Joy on April 09, 2008, 01:28:32 AM
Both seem equally fake to me... this chain of logic:
American = Christian!
Internet = American!
therefore,
Internet = Christian!
Pisses me off no end. It's so asinine and childish that I refuse to accept it as serious. 'American = Christian' is evidently false because I'm addressing a whole bunch of non-Christian Americans right now.
'Internet = American' is something I've heard too many times and it's idiotic for two reasons. Firstly it's untrue; 'the internet' isn't a singular invention that was manifested suddenly by one person or group of people, it's an evolutionary development and there have been many people and groups of people involved in moving it forward to where it is today. Secondly, countries don't invent things anyway... They don't have arms or legs. Individual people invent things, so if you want to argue that it 'belongs' to anyone, with the premise that inventor=owner, then you'd have to look to them. And since they are neither exclusively American or exclusively Christian it puts a big nail in the coffin of that argument.
Hmm, that was a bit of a tangential rant... I think I need my meds.
Back to the matter at hand; aside from the comical retardation of its assertions, absolutely everything I see on this website seems to scream satire at me... the 'Free Kent' banners, the words, the name, etc. Especially the illustrations:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fcreation%2Ffathersonpterosaur.png&hash=785480de0a58171d70f83df3cfe14baba68efb66)
Now if that isn't intended to mock childhood indoctrination then I don't know what is. I doubt even the most hard-core atheists could come up with a more entertainingly grotesque cartoon.
And THIS was funny enough to make me spit apple juice all over my desk the first time I saw it: http://objectiveministries.org/babyj/
When it starts to fire the word "Why?" out of its forehead... that's a kicker.
American = Christian!
Internet = American!
therefore,
Internet = Christian!
Pisses me off no end. It's so asinine and childish that I refuse to accept it as serious. 'American = Christian' is evidently false because I'm addressing a whole bunch of non-Christian Americans right now.
'Internet = American' is something I've heard too many times and it's idiotic for two reasons. Firstly it's untrue; 'the internet' isn't a singular invention that was manifested suddenly by one person or group of people, it's an evolutionary development and there have been many people and groups of people involved in moving it forward to where it is today. Secondly, countries don't invent things anyway... They don't have arms or legs. Individual people invent things, so if you want to argue that it 'belongs' to anyone, with the premise that inventor=owner, then you'd have to look to them. And since they are neither exclusively American or exclusively Christian it puts a big nail in the coffin of that argument.
Hmm, that was a bit of a tangential rant... I think I need my meds.
Back to the matter at hand; aside from the comical retardation of its assertions, absolutely everything I see on this website seems to scream satire at me... the 'Free Kent' banners, the words, the name, etc. Especially the illustrations:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fcreation%2Ffathersonpterosaur.png&hash=785480de0a58171d70f83df3cfe14baba68efb66)
Now if that isn't intended to mock childhood indoctrination then I don't know what is. I doubt even the most hard-core atheists could come up with a more entertainingly grotesque cartoon.
And THIS was funny enough to make me spit apple juice all over my desk the first time I saw it: http://objectiveministries.org/babyj/
When it starts to fire the word "Why?" out of its forehead... that's a kicker.
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Post by: MommaSquid on April 09, 2008, 03:08:33 AM
Post by: MommaSquid on April 09, 2008, 03:08:33 AM
Did you look at the merchandise in the kids section? Too cute!
And then there's this guy....
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi89.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fk227%2FMommaSquid%2F97217561042.jpg&hash=4992c7014dcb73eb4ec048ff3d4810a145ab987c)
And then there's this guy....
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi89.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fk227%2FMommaSquid%2F97217561042.jpg&hash=4992c7014dcb73eb4ec048ff3d4810a145ab987c)
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Post by: Mister Joy on April 10, 2008, 02:36:03 AM
Post by: Mister Joy on April 10, 2008, 02:36:03 AM
I did yeah 
I loved Professer Giraffenstein, after having clicked through the Q&As. I have to believe he's a joke. Otherwise I'd have to use Garry the Gun to shoot myself in the foot and regain my grip on reality.
EDIT: I need to point something else out. In reading about what they think of halloween, and what it should be like, this popped up:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fantioccult%2Fjohnbaptist.jpg&hash=4014f3fb4e3b307ab4e9990c208326f55a3a041c)
which was captioned by "BOO! I'm John the Baptist, and these are my many exciting exploits..."
I love this website, I've decided.
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fkidz%2Fcrucifixnail.png&hash=a11a5c4c189f48464660f8a65d71fdf93ad57b35)
Yeah sorry about impaling you and all that. I wrote the same apology on the nail I'm doing it with just to make sure it 'sinks in'.
I loved Professer Giraffenstein, after having clicked through the Q&As. I have to believe he's a joke. Otherwise I'd have to use Garry the Gun to shoot myself in the foot and regain my grip on reality.EDIT: I need to point something else out. In reading about what they think of halloween, and what it should be like, this popped up:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fantioccult%2Fjohnbaptist.jpg&hash=4014f3fb4e3b307ab4e9990c208326f55a3a041c)
which was captioned by "BOO! I'm John the Baptist, and these are my many exciting exploits..."
I love this website, I've decided.
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fkidz%2Fcrucifixnail.png&hash=a11a5c4c189f48464660f8a65d71fdf93ad57b35)
Yeah sorry about impaling you and all that. I wrote the same apology on the nail I'm doing it with just to make sure it 'sinks in'.
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Post by: jrosebud on April 10, 2008, 04:57:06 AM
Post by: jrosebud on April 10, 2008, 04:57:06 AM
Quote from: "MommaSquid"(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi89.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fk227%2FMommaSquid%2F97217561042.jpg&hash=4992c7014dcb73eb4ec048ff3d4810a145ab987c)
I *love* it! Ha!
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Post by: rlrose328 on April 10, 2008, 06:29:14 AM
Post by: rlrose328 on April 10, 2008, 06:29:14 AM
Quote from: "Mister Joy"Especially the illustrations:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fobjectiveministries.org%2Fcreation%2Ffathersonpterosaur.png&hash=785480de0a58171d70f83df3cfe14baba68efb66)
Now if that isn't intended to mock childhood indoctrination then I don't know what is. I doubt even the most hard-core atheists could come up with a more entertainingly grotesque cartoon.
But the scariest thing is... I KNOW believers who truly and honestly and seriously believe that there are dinosaurs living right now and that Adam and Eve lived with dinosaurs in the garden of eden... and none were meat-eaters. Not until that evil bitch Eve listened to that talking snake and gave poor idiot Adam that apple. That's when every creature on earth who is currently a meat-eater became such.
I was FLOORED when I heard them saying all of this... with a straight and serious face.
I think that's why I'm having such a hard time thinking that site is a parody or satire. Everything I see on there is stuff I've heard at lesat one fundie or gellie say at some point in the past 4 years or so.
My hubby suggested that someone behind the site is truly trying to do a serious Christian site to lure Christians in to make idiots of themselves. And if that's not the case, he'd like to do just that someday. LOL!
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Post by: Mister Joy on April 11, 2008, 03:20:53 AM
Post by: Mister Joy on April 11, 2008, 03:20:53 AM
Quote from: "rlrose"But the scariest thing is... I KNOW believers who truly and honestly and seriously believe that there are dinosaurs living right now and that Adam and Eve lived with dinosaurs in the garden of eden... and none were meat-eaters. Not until that evil bitch Eve listened to that talking snake and gave poor idiot Adam that apple. That's when every creature on earth who is currently a meat-eater became such.
WOW... well that gives me new insight. I'd like to hear how they substantiate this... no doubt it plays on people's ignorance a fair deal. Ie. with 'objectiveministries': "Velociraptors: Today terrorize the goat herders of Puerto Rico and are rumored to guard the remains of the Ark on Mt. Ararat."
Yes indeed. Entirely plausible.I know a fella who hales from Puerto Rico, actually. I'll have to ask him about that next time I see him at the pub. Probably wont go down well, though: "So I hear the goat farmers get a lot of trouble with velociraptors where you come from? Dinosaurs, eh? What a nuisance."
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Post by: rlrose328 on April 11, 2008, 07:16:43 AM
Post by: rlrose328 on April 11, 2008, 07:16:43 AM
Have you seen photos from the Creation Museum in Kentucky? Here is their About Us page: http://www.creationmuseum.org/about (http://www.creationmuseum.org/about)
Next, go here and click on the Creation Museum brochure in the Downloads area. http://www.creationmuseum.org/plan-your-visit (http://www.creationmuseum.org/plan-your-visit) Once you read that, the Objective: Ministries site doesn't sound so much like satire any more.
Finally, here is a great article/blog about the museum with some good photos of the signs that justify their warped science. http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture ... museum.ars (http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture/ars-takes-a-field-trip-the-creation-museum.ars)
Be sure to go to the bottom of the second page where he has a link to his Flickr page with more photos of the ark and more false science.
It's so incredibly frustrating and sad that people believe this crap much less that there is a museum that promotes it as fact.
Next, go here and click on the Creation Museum brochure in the Downloads area. http://www.creationmuseum.org/plan-your-visit (http://www.creationmuseum.org/plan-your-visit) Once you read that, the Objective: Ministries site doesn't sound so much like satire any more.
Finally, here is a great article/blog about the museum with some good photos of the signs that justify their warped science. http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture ... museum.ars (http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture/ars-takes-a-field-trip-the-creation-museum.ars)
Be sure to go to the bottom of the second page where he has a link to his Flickr page with more photos of the ark and more false science.
It's so incredibly frustrating and sad that people believe this crap much less that there is a museum that promotes it as fact.
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Post by: Tom62 on April 11, 2008, 07:28:35 PM
Post by: Tom62 on April 11, 2008, 07:28:35 PM
I just wonder why those velociraptors needed those sharp long teeth and claws for. Probably to defend themselves against fresh fruit.
Mmm.. that reminds me of the famous Monthy Python self defence sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bCyIAsSid8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bCyIAsSid8)
"Now, self-defence. Tonight I shall be carrying on from where we got to last week when I was showing you how to defend yourselves against anyone who attacks you with armed with a piece of fresh fruit."
Mmm.. that reminds me of the famous Monthy Python self defence sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bCyIAsSid8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bCyIAsSid8)
"Now, self-defence. Tonight I shall be carrying on from where we got to last week when I was showing you how to defend yourselves against anyone who attacks you with armed with a piece of fresh fruit."