Happy Atheist Forum

So Halloween is in 10 days and I thought we would celebrate this occasion by sitting around the virtual camp fire and share some scary bible verses. The Bible is more scary than any horror film you will ever watch. I will start first...

(Psalms 137:9) Blessed is he who takes your little babies and dashes them against the rocks.

Isn't it so spooky? What terrifies me the most is that I seen adult brain-dead believers willing to say it's perfectly reasonable because God said so and they are willing to teach it to their children. It haunts me to this day. Share some more if you dare.

Fiction is fiction, I for one would like to hear some real life ghost encounters.

The tales in the Uncle Remus stories or Aesops Fables are not only equivalent to the bible stories but more entertaining and informative. The scary stories of the Bible are too much "off the deep end" to carry much interest for rational readers. .......But then again it might be fun around the campfire. 

Who is bringing the s'mores?

The Asmo is not in a mood to smell all camp-fire-y.

Quote from: No one on October 21, 2016, 04:56:45 PM
Fiction is fiction, I for one would like to hear some real life ghost encounters.

I saw a classic "white lady" once, but it was late at night and my eyesight sucks so I don't put much stock in my own experience.

WHERE'S THE FIRE?



There it is.

Should have a few Qur'ans in it; that heats the world right up like global warming could not even dream of.  8)

I don't have any real ghost stories. I wish I did.

My house is 260 years old. Everyone keeps telling me it's haunted... because being old makes you haunted, I guess. I found out the inventor of the lock stitch sewing machine lived here, so I put out a bunch of needles and cloth and a sewing machine, but nothing ever happened. Too bad. Could have been so interesting.

I'd say that stories in the Bible are more often nausea-inducing than scary. Those tales are the residue of a blood-thirsty culture that's long extinct. Its progeny have moved on, though something of the repugnant ideology survives, manifested in various aspects of modern cultures. See for instance the infamous example of William Lane Craig "justifying" genocide (http://www.reasonablefaith.org/slaughter-of-the-canaanites), as related in the Old Testament.

Great times when I was a young kid and believed in ghosts and boogeymen.  :tellmemore:

Mature McLeod,  as much as I love a good campfire, sitting around it, swapping tall tales, thinking about the future, or the cute guy next to me, or how deep space is....
Yes, as much as I love that, Bible doesn't enter into my enjoyment one iota. In fact, it would try to ruin a perfectly good campfire experience. Because you see, I spent years and years of my life in a near constant state of religion induced fear. My days and nights were infused with terror. Thanks All Loving God!
So I'm sure you will understand when I decline to participate in your fiery scare session. And I will understand that you are still working through this residual fear and maybe figuring out what's true and fiction. May you find the peace and freedom that your heart so deeply desires.

Quote from: Dragonia on October 24, 2016, 09:01:45 PM
Mature McLeod,  as much as I love a good campfire, sitting around it, swapping tall tales, thinking about the future, or the cute guy next to me, or how deep space is....
Yes, as much as I love that, Bible doesn't enter into my enjoyment one iota. In fact, it would try to ruin a perfectly good campfire experience. Because you see, I spent years and years of my life in a near constant state of religion induced fear. My days and nights were infused with terror. Thanks All Loving God!
So I'm sure you will understand when I decline to participate in your fiery scare session. And I will understand that you are still working through this residual fear and maybe figuring out what's true and fiction. May you find the peace and freedom that your heart so deeply desires.

Deuteronomy7:3-4 and 2Corinthians6:14-18 banging on about being unequally yoked and the anger of the Lord being kindled against you and the unbeliever being unclean affected me so much that, looking back, I was permanently terrrified, perhaps to the point of being mentally unstable. That's all in the past now and the bible is consigned to my history. 🙂 I like the idea of spooky, psychological thriller stories round e camp fire though I don't know any.

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 24, 2016, 11:25:24 PM
Deuteronomy7:3-4 and 2Corinthians6:14-18 banging on about being unequally yoked and the anger of the Lord being kindled against you and the unbeliever being unclean affected me so much that, looking back, I was permanently terrrified, perhaps to the point of being mentally unstable. That's all in the past now and the bible is consigned to my history. . . .

It was merde like that, and similar passages, that raised my hackles as a child. It sounded like hate to me, and my reaction was to hate right back. I wanted no part of it. Being one of the designated pariahs at the Catholic school I attended only served to cement my atheism, overlaid with an unhealthy burden of hatred and disgust. I've broken though the hatred in the subsequent decades, but I think I will always sympathize with those who have yet to shed that burden.

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 24, 2016, 11:25:24 PM
.... I was permanently terrrified, perhaps to the point of being mentally unstable....

Yes.... I think so. Me too.

Im lucky I didnt read the bible when i was a kid. I would have been scarred for life!

Quote from: MariaEvri on October 25, 2016, 05:49:01 PM
Im lucky I didnt read the bible when i was a kid. I would have been scarred for life!

I'm lucky too.  :shifty:
A few years ago I read, The Book of Revelation, for the first time in my life, and I was like... :twitch:    :wtf:    :worried:

It made me angry to see how much God hates our guts. That's when I developed an attitude:
"If you are real..."
(https://i.makeagif.com/media/2-03-2016/3Gz2Uv.gif)

Weirdly, very weirdly, it never occurred to me that God as portrayed in the bible was just wrong. It was always me who didn't measure up. It's all so sad, especially as Recusant says, for those still labouring under the burden.  But hey, I'm with HAF now, and happy.

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 26, 2016, 12:06:16 AM
... But hey, I'm with HAF now, and happy.

:hug:
That's beautiful.

Ok gather round children.

There was a guy who made some people out of sand then told him not to touch his stash but they did anyway, then he scared the hell out of them and kicked them out. Then he made them have kids, and those kids have kids with each other. Then the guy who made the first two sand people demand that all sand people give him tribute or be sent to hell. In these tributes, you have to give up all your secrets and privacy, but you don't have that with him anyway because he is spying on everyone already and knows you so well, he knows what you're going to do before you do it. And if you don't measure up to his confusing standards, he will send you to burn forever, in a crowded, underground lake of fire.

Quote from: Apathy on October 26, 2016, 04:09:33 AM
...he will send you to burn forever, in a crowded, underground lake of fire.

Quote from: Magdalena on October 26, 2016, 05:23:11 AM

Quote from: Apathy on October 26, 2016, 04:09:33 AM
...he will send you to burn forever, in a crowded, underground lake of fire.

(https://67.media.tumblr.com/a01daf1c9415648e53edf941bb3bd246/tumblr_o72xpjl0XZ1s5utrfo1_400.gif)

haha

QuoteA few years ago I read, The Book of Revelation, for the first time in my life, and I was like...

I am reading the bible now and didn;t get to that part yet
Although I read parts to know that the writter is one sick f$ck

Quote from: MariaEvri on October 26, 2016, 04:49:58 PM

QuoteA few years ago I read, The Book of Revelation, for the first time in my life, and I was like...

I am reading the bible now and didn;t get to that part yet
Although I read parts to know that the writter is one sick f$ck

Oh, don't worry, they definitely saved the best for last.  ;D

:secrets1: I don't want to tell you how the book ends, but I am gonna say that it ends with a Big Boom! Big Badaboom!

--That's all I'm saying.  :nu-uh:

Quote from: Magdalena on October 27, 2016, 04:58:49 AM

Quote from: MariaEvri on October 26, 2016, 04:49:58 PM

QuoteA few years ago I read, The Book of Revelation, for the first time in my life, and I was like...

I am reading the bible now and didn;t get to that part yet
Although I read parts to know that the writter is one sick f$ck

Oh, don't worry, they definitely saved the best for last.  ;D

:secrets1: I don't want to tell you how the book ends, but I am gonna say that it ends with a Big Boom! Big Badaboom!

--That's all I'm saying.  :nu-uh:

But not to worry! Because God will make a NEW heaven and a NEW Earth, after all the nastiness! Yay! ::)

Will a person still be able to beat disobedient wives (plural) and children, The Asmo wonders... :???:

Quote from: Asmodean on October 27, 2016, 02:06:58 PM
Will a person still be able to beat disobedient wives (plural) and children, The Asmo wonders... :???:

What if this time, god makes a woman first and she convinces (Adam) that only she can eat from the tree of knowledge and that god is a woman...and he believes her.  :lol:
Magdalena wonders...:???:

God hasn't tried that yet, he should. I'm sure we wouldn't abuse our power.  :devil2:

Could I have just a couple if fit slaves though? Could I? I'd treat them well.

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 29, 2016, 12:30:22 AM
Could I have just a couple if fit slaves though? Could I? I'd treat them well.

Hmm, somehow I don't think Uncle Bert (Bertrand Russell) would approve.  ;) He might still be your friend, though, even then.

Ah well, I'm probably too old for a couple of fit blokes anyway. They can have their freedom.😔

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 29, 2016, 12:45:57 AM
Ah well, I'm probably too old for a couple of fit blokes anyway. They can have their freedom.😔

Well, it would of course depend on how assiduous you were in seeing to proper discipline. If your enthusiasm for the task were to wane, you could always sell them on. :sidesmile:

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 29, 2016, 12:30:22 AM
Could I have just a couple if fit slaves though? Could I? I'd treat them well.

:lol:


























No.  >:(
























I came up with this idea so I make the rules, and I say, "No, you can't have slaves."  :nu-uh:

I could really use a few slaves to do my bidding. :chin: What if they were led to believe that they were free? Or perhaps I'd throw some bible verses at them to keep them quiet if that didn't work. :dominidomini: Could I have some then?

Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 29, 2016, 08:34:36 AM
I could really use a few slaves to do my bidding. :chin: What if they were led to believe that they were free? Or perhaps I'd throw some bible verses at them to keep them quiet if that didn't work. :dominidomini: Could I have some then?

I'm told that there are Yazidi slaves on offer in Saudi Arabia.

Quote from: Tom62 on October 29, 2016, 03:13:42 PM

Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 29, 2016, 08:34:36 AM
I could really use a few slaves to do my bidding. :chin: What if they were led to believe that they were free? Or perhaps I'd throw some bible verses at them to keep them quiet if that didn't work. :dominidomini: Could I have some then?

I'm told that there are Yazidi slaves on offer in Saudi Arabia.

Yeah but...I don't want to finance fundamentalist groups by purchasing a slave or three off of them. I would rather they came voluntarily, preferably in the form of an internee or something similar.     

 :sad sigh:

Quote from: Magdalena on October 29, 2016, 10:00:53 PM
:sad sigh:

You're so sweet, Mags.  I would be :rant1:

Quote from: BooksCatsEtc on October 29, 2016, 10:18:36 PM

Quote from: Magdalena on October 29, 2016, 10:00:53 PM
:sad sigh:

You're so sweet, Mags.  I would be :rant1:

I'm just joking around...

:couchhide:

Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 30, 2016, 12:32:54 AM

Quote from: BooksCatsEtc on October 29, 2016, 10:18:36 PM

Quote from: Magdalena on October 29, 2016, 10:00:53 PM
:sad sigh:

You're so sweet, Mags.  I would be :rant1:

I'm just joking around...

:couchhide:

OK. I'm barely recovering from that "bitch fit" I had in the I hate rap thread.  :shifty:

:secrets1: I will give you permission to "Just look around..."

:grin:

Quote from: Recusant on October 29, 2016, 01:40:27 AM

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 29, 2016, 12:45:57 AM
Ah well, I'm probably too old for a couple of fit blokes anyway. They can have their freedom.😔

Well, it would of course depend on how assiduous you were in seeing to proper discipline. If your enthusiasm for the task were to wane, you could always sell them on. :sidesmile:

Depends what 'disciplining' means and who's carrying it out.

Quote from: Magdalena on October 29, 2016, 05:03:35 AM

Quote from: Essie Mae on October 29, 2016, 12:30:22 AM
Could I have just a couple if fit slaves though? Could I? I'd treat them well.

:lol:
They're history :(

























No.  >:(
























I came up with this idea so I make the rules, and I say, "No, you can't have slaves."  :nu-uh:

If there are no slaves that would destroy the basis of marriage.

Minions are enslaved by The Asmo, but that's like totally different.  :snooty:

Quote from: Asmodean on October 31, 2016, 11:11:30 PM
Minions are enslaved by The Asmo, but that's like totally different.  :snooty:

Even Mags might allow that as they're not real. I wouldn't be interested though; hardly fit blokes. Do they even have genders?

Quote from: Essie Mae on November 01, 2016, 08:39:21 PM
Even Mags might allow that as they're not real.

What do you mean, "not real?" Of course, they are real!  >:(

Quote
I wouldn't be interested though; hardly fit blokes. Do they even have genders?

Utterly genderless. Also, they have no navels.

Quote from: Asmodean on November 02, 2016, 10:01:57 AM
...
Utterly genderless. Also, they have no navels.

So they're like what the religious call, "angels" --but His Minions have no wings, arms, navel, or legs?   :chin:

Well, no, they do not. But they are evil.  :smilenod:

Quote from: Asmodean on November 03, 2016, 01:03:20 AM
Well, no, they do not. But they are evil.  :smilenod:

I believe Him.  :smilenod:

If He made them in His image...
That fierce gaze and those eyebrows! Lethal! :worried:

Arms. Hmph! >:( Legs. Bah! >:( As His mesiah, the Anti-John Nonnel, once said, "All you need is evil."

Quote from: Asmodean on November 03, 2016, 01:29:28 AM
Arms. Hmph! >:( Legs. Bah! >:( As His mesiah, the Anti-John Nonnel, once said, "All you need is evil."

:dance1:
"All you need is evil, all you need is evil,
All you need is evil, evil. Evil is all you need...
...Evil is all you need..."

I love that song!

I thought MatureMcLeod might enjoy this:

^ Mr. D. nails it with inconvenient evidence and cruel logic.

^ They misspelled "altar", and I'm sorry I'm the sort of person who notices such things.

Not to be sorry Sandy.  You have been plenty cool with any critique that you have made now or in the past.

Quote from: BooksCatsEtc on November 14, 2016, 02:02:05 AM
^ They misspelled "altar", and I'm sorry I'm the sort of person who notices such things.

American spelling?

Pastors I knew would just dismiss all that as the expected attacks on Xianity. There is a bible verse saying that would happen, but I can't remember it. One otherwise lovely church member conducted a year-long bible study, (an hour each Tuesday evening), explaining, rationalising and justifying the OT.

I think one ease of the "morals" the bible "teaches" you, is that it's convenient. If you don't have to go through life thinking for yourself, you can just regurgitate anything you read, or are told, from the bible. And you can feel it's totally justified because you listen to a guy preach about it every week or so and listen to it from your family, friends, co-workers, ect.

Quote from: Apathy on November 15, 2016, 07:51:07 PM
I think one ease of the "morals" the bible "teaches" you, is that it's convenient. If you don't have to go through life thinking for yourself, you can just regurgitate anything you read, or are told, from the bible. And you can feel it's totally justified because you listen to a guy preach about it every week or so and listen to it from your family, friends, co-workers, ect.

Very true, but it was those sessions on the OT which stared the domino effect of gradual disbelief ending in unequivocal atheism for me.

Quote from: Essie Mae on November 15, 2016, 09:23:53 AM

Quote from: BooksCatsEtc on November 14, 2016, 02:02:05 AM
^ They misspelled "altar", and I'm sorry I'm the sort of person who notices such things.

American spelling?

Nah, we recognize the difference between "alter" and "altar", but some people just seem not to know it.