Title: Jesus for President
Post by: Evolved on June 30, 2008, 08:36:04 PM
Post by: Evolved on June 30, 2008, 08:36:04 PM
QuotePITTSBURGH, Pennsylvania (CNN) -- They're spiritual misfits. Rabble-rousers. They packed the shell of the old Baptist church on Negley Avenue in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, to hear author, Christian activist and fellow misfit Shane Claiborne stump on the campaign for a third party candidate, Jesus.
People pack churches to hear Shane Claiborne talk about "Jesus for President," the book he co-authored.
The dreadlocked Christian activist from Philadelphia and his team parked a black school bus around the back. The hand-painted gold letters on the side read "Jesus for President."
The bus runs on vegetable oil and, yes, it's a political statement.
"It'll be a long time before we fight a war over used veggie oil," says Claiborne with a sly smile.
Claiborne is touring the country, packing churches and community centers, in support of the book he and Chris Haw co-authored, "Jesus for President."
"This whole project is about the political imagination of what it means to follow after Jesus," Claiborne said. "The language of Jesus as Lord and savior is just as radical as it would be to say 'Jesus as our commander in chief' today."
http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/06/29/evangelical.campaign/index.html
Now why is it that this makes me think of Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem?
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi284.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fll25%2FEvolveds_Photos%2FMayhembandposter.jpg&hash=a1880e939d2c473a9f439438836eec6c1e488b76)(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi284.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fll25%2FEvolveds_Photos%2F300px-Mayhembus.jpg&hash=3a76aaae9f1074efeb4c0c5d68e7b7ce87355bad)
Muppets are cooler and have more brains, though.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: myleviathan on June 30, 2008, 08:59:07 PM
Post by: myleviathan on June 30, 2008, 08:59:07 PM
South Park was nearly correct in saying that the worst kind of hippy is the "college know-it-all" hippy. I don't agree anymore. NO, it's the Jesus is running for president, evangelical hippy. That's the worst kind of hippy.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: leftyguitarjoe on June 30, 2008, 09:46:05 PM
Post by: leftyguitarjoe on June 30, 2008, 09:46:05 PM
ug. I hope he finds a way to over dose on reefer.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: Will on June 30, 2008, 09:48:32 PM
Post by: Will on June 30, 2008, 09:48:32 PM
Jesus would make a horrible president.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: leftyguitarjoe on June 30, 2008, 10:03:09 PM
Post by: leftyguitarjoe on June 30, 2008, 10:03:09 PM
Quote from: "Willravel"Jesus would make a horrible president.
Hahaha.
Lets think of what would happen!!! I want to hear some fun scenarios!!
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: Will on July 01, 2008, 01:41:37 AM
Post by: Will on July 01, 2008, 01:41:37 AM
Quote from: "leftyguitarjoe"Hahaha.The Adventures of Candidate Jesus~!
Lets think of what would happen!!! I want to hear some fun scenarios!!
7/1/08: Jesus tries to impress everyone on the campaign trail by walking across the Reflecting Pool in front of the Washington Monument. Onlookers are amazed until they realize that the reflecting pool really isn't all that deep. He loses 5 points in the polls. Fundamentalists insist that he walked on water until Richard Dawkins walks across it, too. John McCain tries to cross the Reflecting Pool and nearly drowns because he can't do anything right.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: EvolutionCalling on July 01, 2008, 02:00:27 AM
Post by: EvolutionCalling on July 01, 2008, 02:00:27 AM
It's revealed that Jesus has indeed been having sexual relations with that women, Ms. Magdalen, in the oval office. Jesus later discovers the source of the anonymous tip was a CIA Operative named Judas, who's identity is subsequently released to the press by accident. His administration is tarnished further after Vice President Peter shoots another Apostle in the face during a hunting expedition at the Gaze Strip Wildlife and Game Preserve. Lastly, Secretary of State The Pope would be arrested after attempting to solicit homosexual favors from an underage Page while visiting Capital Hill to check the progress of repainting of the Capital Dome ceiling to match the Sistine Chapel.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: susangail on July 01, 2008, 02:38:17 AM
Post by: susangail on July 01, 2008, 02:38:17 AM
Quote from: "EvolutionCalling"It's revealed that Jesus has indeed been having sexual relations with that women, Ms. Magdalen, in the oval office. Jesus later discovers the source of the anonymous tip was a CIA Operative named Judas, who's identity is subsequently released to the press by accident. His administration is tarnished further after Vice President Peter shoots another Apostle in the face during a hunting expedition at the Gaze Strip Wildlife and Game Preserve. Lastly, Secretary of State The Pope would be arrested after attempting to solicit homosexual favors from an underage Page while visiting Capital Hill to check the progress of repainting of the Capital Dome ceiling to match the Sistine Chapel.roflol
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: afreethinker30 on July 01, 2008, 04:17:47 AM
Post by: afreethinker30 on July 01, 2008, 04:17:47 AM
Quote from: "EvolutionCalling"It's revealed that Jesus has indeed been having sexual relations with that women, Ms. Magdalen, in the oval office. Jesus later discovers the source of the anonymous tip was a CIA Operative named Judas, who's identity is subsequently released to the press by accident. His administration is tarnished further after Vice President Peter shoots another Apostle in the face during a hunting expedition at the Gaze Strip Wildlife and Game Preserve. Lastly, Secretary of State The Pope would be arrested after attempting to solicit homosexual favors from an underage Page while visiting Capital Hill to check the progress of repainting of the Capital Dome ceiling to match the Sistine Chapel.
That would make such a great soap!
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: MariaEvri on July 01, 2008, 01:00:39 PM
Post by: MariaEvri on July 01, 2008, 01:00:39 PM
Quote from: "Willravel"Jesus would make a horrible president.
..considering he's dead and all...
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: Smallville on July 01, 2008, 01:24:29 PM
Post by: Smallville on July 01, 2008, 01:24:29 PM
Quote from: "MariaEvri"Quote from: "Willravel"Jesus would make a horrible president.
..considering he's dead and all...
And considering he wouldn't even fill the bill of qualifications: not 35, not a natural-born American citizen, not a permanent resident for the past fourteen years.
And now for something else: Obama panders to the evangelical crowd:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080701/ap_ ... bama_faith (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080701/ap_on_el_pr/obama_faith)
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: LARA on July 01, 2008, 04:03:16 PM
Post by: LARA on July 01, 2008, 04:03:16 PM
:D :D You guys are funny. I have to try one.
Jesus finds his opinion ratings dropping among the farming community after sending a Nevada pig farmer's entire stock running over a cliff and an incident in an orange grove where he withers the crop for not magically providing him breakfast juice. His popularity in the public is hampered further when he explains both the pig and trees were possessed of Satan. Sullen and confused, he retires to Camp David for a pleasant retreat, only to find on his return to the Whitehouse the public is angered even further that his new tax code of "rendering unto Cesear what is Cesear's" has left the population in the poorhouse.
Jesus finds his opinion ratings dropping among the farming community after sending a Nevada pig farmer's entire stock running over a cliff and an incident in an orange grove where he withers the crop for not magically providing him breakfast juice. His popularity in the public is hampered further when he explains both the pig and trees were possessed of Satan. Sullen and confused, he retires to Camp David for a pleasant retreat, only to find on his return to the Whitehouse the public is angered even further that his new tax code of "rendering unto Cesear what is Cesear's" has left the population in the poorhouse.
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: Smallville on July 01, 2008, 04:09:35 PM
Post by: Smallville on July 01, 2008, 04:09:35 PM
Quote from: "leftyguitarjoe"Quote from: "Willravel"Jesus would make a horrible president.
Hahaha.
Lets think of what would happen!!! I want to hear some fun scenarios!!
OK.
Tomorrow's Headlines:
Voting Fraud Implicated.
Dead Voters Resurrected.
Jesus claims, "It's not my fault!"
"Oh, wait! Yes, it is!"
Title: Re: Jesus for President
Post by: afreethinker30 on July 02, 2008, 06:09:30 PM
Post by: afreethinker30 on July 02, 2008, 06:09:30 PM
Quote from: "Smallville"Quote from: "leftyguitarjoe"Quote from: "Willravel"Jesus would make a horrible president.
Hahaha.
Lets think of what would happen!!! I want to hear some fun scenarios!!
OK.
Tomorrow's Headlines:
Voting Fraud Implicated.
Dead Voters Resurrected.
Jesus claims, "It's not my fault!"
"Oh, wait! Yes, it is!"