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Jokes Thread (Was named Anyone know any good jokes ? I'll start :D )

Started by no_god_know_peace, November 10, 2011, 12:46:34 AM

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billy rubin



more people have been to berlin than i have

billy rubin



more people have been to berlin than i have

Dark Lightning


Magdalena


"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Tank

If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Magdalena


"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Dark Lightning


Tank

Quote from: Dark Lightning on August 11, 2022, 04:25:27 PMMaybe it's just me, but I don't see any improvement.  :query:

Thus demonstrating you  are neither female or gay.
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Dark Lightning

Quote from: Tank on August 11, 2022, 05:29:25 PM
Quote from: Dark Lightning on August 11, 2022, 04:25:27 PMMaybe it's just me, but I don't see any improvement.  :query:

Thus demonstrating you  are neither female or gay.

Nahhh, I think they're both cute...  ;D

hermes2015

Quote from: Tank on August 11, 2022, 05:29:25 PM
Quote from: Dark Lightning on August 11, 2022, 04:25:27 PMMaybe it's just me, but I don't see any improvement.  :query:

Thus demonstrating you  are neither female or gay.

Well, not all gays like hair. I prefer smooth bodies, especially Asian ones.
"Eventually everything connects - people, ideas, objects. The quality of the connections is the key to quality per se."
― Charles Eames

No one

What can a woman put in her hoop earrings to make her more attractive?


Her ankles.

Tank

Q: What happens when you talk to a cow?
A: It goes in one ear and out the udder!
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

billy rubin



more people have been to berlin than i have

Tank

I do. But I'm also having a silly phase at the moment.



I saw a pig with laryngitis.

He was disgruntled.
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

hermes2015

A little boy goes to see the priest for confession, he says "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."

The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?"

"Yes, Father, it is."

"And who was the girl you were with?"

"I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?"

"I cannot say."

"Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?"

"I'll never tell."

"Was it Nina Capelli?"

"I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."

"Was it Cathy Piriano?"

"My lips are sealed."

"Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?"

"Please, Father! I cannot tell you."

The priest sighs in frustration. "You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself."

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?"

"Four months vacation and five good leads..."
"Eventually everything connects - people, ideas, objects. The quality of the connections is the key to quality per se."
― Charles Eames