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your bucket list

Started by billy rubin, March 18, 2020, 03:09:12 PM

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Randy

I don't know that I have one. I've done a lot in my short life. I consider 59 to be somewhat young still if one is in good health.

My father died of cancer when he was 58. He worked all his life rarely taking time off. He saved his money for a retirement that he'd never see. I know he wanted his own business and was working toward that goal but time after time things didn't go his way. He never got it.

It took about a year and a half, maybe two years, for the cancer to kill him. He was in a lot of pain and in the hospital for the last six to eight weeks of his life.

He was complaining of pain again after he went into remission. The doctor came back with the x-ray and showed it to me and my mother. His chest looked like it had cotton balls all over it. He said, "He won't be leaving the hospital." The following day the cancer attacked his spinal cord and he became paraplegic. He was on morphine and I don't know what else. The pain for him, even on morphine, showed in his face.

I watched him lose weight over the weeks, sleeping more and more, eating less and less. They gave him cartons of Ensure which he never drank and I forget why. Maybe he didn't like the taste. What he did love was coffee. So sometimes I would go downstairs to the coffee machine and get him and myself a cup and talk.

Anyway, I'm off topic now. I guess what I wanted to say is that don't wait to live. I learned a valuable lesson and that is never expect the future to play out like you think. Sure, save money, but don't work your life away. Live for the moment because that's all one really has. I know it first hand now that I've got the disease.

So, I have no bucket list.
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Recusant

I genuinely appreciate your advice.  :notes:
"Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration — courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and above all, love of the truth."
— H. L. Mencken


Dark Lightning

My youngest brother survived laryngeal cancer caused by smoking. My mother, father and one younger brother succumbed to tobacco-related disease, and they all suffered. I'm really sorry to see that you are in this predicament. I can't imagine what it is like, even after having seen it for many people, since I'm on the outside of it.  :(

Tank

My father died of cancer two weeks after my 17th birthday in 1967. He died of secondaries from a previous bout. He was on diamorphine, which I used to collect from the chemist. My mother injected him as she had been a nurse. Diamorphine is the posh name for heroine.
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Randy

Quote from: Tank on May 16, 2020, 06:08:59 AM
My father died of cancer two weeks after my 17th birthday in 1967. He died of secondaries from a previous bout. He was on diamorphine, which I used to collect from the chemist. My mother injected him as she had been a nurse. Diamorphine is the posh name for heroine.

I'm sorry to hear that. Were you close?

I'm glad that medical science has gotten this far. I've had more treatments than I think my father had although our cancers are different. Still, I think he would have had more options if he'd had what we have now some twenty-six years ago.

One co-worker told me, "Thank God!"
I replied, "Thank medical science!"
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Randy

Quote from: Dark Lightning on May 16, 2020, 04:49:41 AM
My youngest brother survived laryngeal cancer caused by smoking. My mother, father and one younger brother succumbed to tobacco-related disease, and they all suffered. I'm really sorry to see that you are in this predicament. I can't imagine what it is like, even after having seen it for many people, since I'm on the outside of it.  :(

I hope you never have to find out. :)

My brother smokes heavily. I'm surprised he doesn't have lung cancer. He tells me repeatedly that his doctor told him, "It will take ten years off your life."

He replied, "But it's the last ten years. What am I going to miss, drooling on myself?" He's got a sense of humor, albeit a caustic one. He loves confrontation.

Anyway, I didn't mean for this to be a downer thread. I actually came here to modify my answer before I realized that three people have replied. So I'll leave it be.
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

billy rubin

nonethelezz. you are correct to recommend that one live in the moment.

there is no pazt or future. all anybody has iz an eternal *now*

ive like therez no tomorrow, because there isnt.


more people have been to berlin than i have

Randy

Quote from: Dark Lightning on May 16, 2020, 04:49:41 AM
My youngest brother survived laryngeal cancer caused by smoking. My mother, father and one younger brother succumbed to tobacco-related disease, and they all suffered. I'm really sorry to see that you are in this predicament. I can't imagine what it is like, even after having seen it for many people, since I'm on the outside of it.  :(

I imagine it is different for many people. There are several different kinds of cancers with several different treatments for each. Mine was caused by HPV and I don't know that I could have avoided it. It became a head-and-neck cancer on the base of my tongue. The thing has metastasized to my liver, my hip bone, and probably encasing my gallbladder. We haven't done a biopsy of it as most likely it is the same.

I'm in no pain so far, and in pretty good spirits overall. I had a slight breakdown yesterday but I'm feeling better today. My nausea is under control as well as my coughing, The trach irritates the back of my throat sometimes causing me to cough. I don't think there are any more treatment types they can give me. After this one fails that's when the tumors grow nonstop. That's when I think I'll need painkillers. But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Magdalena

Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Randy

Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you? I'll try to explain although I may just end up getting it all muddled.
There was a time when I had a band. We wrote our own songs. I played the guitar. My brother played the drums and brought homemade beer. It was a little stronger than the stores supply. Have a couple of these and the music begins to deteriorate.

Or the time I invited my brother's family and a couple of friends over for Thanksgiving. This time he brought the stuff from the store. The three of us men were going to cook the turkey outside in a deep fryer. We couldn't get the propane lit so, in my drunken stupor I suggested we put the pot on the gas stove. It took a lot longer but the oil was finally ready. In went the turkey.

We had oil pouring over the sides of the pot. My brother's hands were scalding but he couldn't let go or it would have been a disaster. Meanwhile, the friend is over in the corner laughing. He finally gets it in and we mop up the oil that spilled everywhere.

What had not crossed our minds due to the fog of the brain was that we could have set the house on fire. We learned a valuable lesson that day. Next time we eat at Golden Corral.

That kind of fog I don't mind although I haven't drank a beer in several years now due to the medication. I should add that to my bucket list. Have a beer on my way out, my final act if you will. What is the nurse going to do? She'd probably let me since it won't matter anymore. :)
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Magdalena

Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you?
No, I just thought you were asking for a beer, if I could, I would come to the rescue and bring you a beer.   :devil2:
I don't mind fog induced by beer, either.
:grin:

Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
I'll try to explain although I may just end up getting it all muddled.
There was a time when I had a band. We wrote our own songs. I played the guitar. My brother played the drums and brought homemade beer. It was a little stronger than the stores supply. Have a couple of these and the music begins to deteriorate.

Or the time I invited my brother's family and a couple of friends over for Thanksgiving. This time he brought the stuff from the store. The three of us men were going to cook the turkey outside in a deep fryer. We couldn't get the propane lit so, in my drunken stupor I suggested we put the pot on the gas stove. It took a lot longer but the oil was finally ready. In went the turkey.

We had oil pouring over the sides of the pot. My brother's hands were scalding but he couldn't let go or it would have been a disaster. Meanwhile, the friend is over in the corner laughing. He finally gets it in and we mop up the oil that spilled everywhere.

What had not crossed our minds due to the fog of the brain was that we could have set the house on fire. We learned a valuable lesson that day. Next time we eat at Golden Corral.

That kind of fog I don't mind although I haven't drank a beer in several years now due to the medication. I should add that to my bucket list. Have a beer on my way out, my final act if you will. What is the nurse going to do? She'd probably let me since it won't matter anymore. :)
That's a funny story, I can almost see it. :lol:
~Dangerous too.  :run!: :haironfire:

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Randy

Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 11:13:16 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you?
No, I just thought you were asking for a beer, if I could, I would come to the rescue and bring you a beer.   :devil2:
I don't mind fog induced by beer, either.
:grin:
I'd take it too. I'm half tempted to get my caretaker to get me one but my taste buds aren't working correctly so I have no idea how it would taste. Give me a few and I won't care. :lol:
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
I'll try to explain although I may just end up getting it all muddled.
There was a time when I had a band. We wrote our own songs. I played the guitar. My brother played the drums and brought homemade beer. It was a little stronger than the stores supply. Have a couple of these and the music begins to deteriorate.

Or the time I invited my brother's family and a couple of friends over for Thanksgiving. This time he brought the stuff from the store. The three of us men were going to cook the turkey outside in a deep fryer. We couldn't get the propane lit so, in my drunken stupor I suggested we put the pot on the gas stove. It took a lot longer but the oil was finally ready. In went the turkey.

We had oil pouring over the sides of the pot. My brother's hands were scalding but he couldn't let go or it would have been a disaster. Meanwhile, the friend is over in the corner laughing. He finally gets it in and we mop up the oil that spilled everywhere.

What had not crossed our minds due to the fog of the brain was that we could have set the house on fire. We learned a valuable lesson that day. Next time we eat at Golden Corral.

That kind of fog I don't mind although I haven't drank a beer in several years now due to the medication. I should add that to my bucket list. Have a beer on my way out, my final act if you will. What is the nurse going to do? She'd probably let me since it won't matter anymore. :)
That's a funny story, I can almost see it. :lol:
~Dangerous too.  :run!: :haironfire:

"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Magdalena

Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 11:53:07 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 11:13:16 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you?
No, I just thought you were asking for a beer, if I could, I would come to the rescue and bring you a beer.   :devil2:
I don't mind fog induced by beer, either.
:grin:
I'd take it too. I'm half tempted to get my caretaker to get me one but my taste buds aren't working correctly so I have no idea how it would taste. Give me a few and I won't care. :lol:
"Give me a few and I won't care."
Ha!  :lol:
I think that's how I ended up with  a malt liquor in my hand at the end of the day, the other day.

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Randy

Quote from: Magdalena on May 17, 2020, 02:29:46 AM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 11:53:07 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 11:13:16 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you?
No, I just thought you were asking for a beer, if I could, I would come to the rescue and bring you a beer.   :devil2:
I don't mind fog induced by beer, either.
:grin:
I'd take it too. I'm half tempted to get my caretaker to get me one but my taste buds aren't working correctly so I have no idea how it would taste. Give me a few and I won't care. :lol:
"Give me a few and I won't care."
Ha!  :lol:
I think that's how I ended up with  a malt liquor in my hand at the end of the day, the other day.
:lol: Yeah, I can well relate. Out of curiosity, what is your favorite beer? Mine is either Guinness or Yuengling Black & Tan depending on what I feel like.
"Maybe it's just a bunch of stuff that happens." -- Homer Simpson
"Some people focus on the destination. Atheists focus on the journey." -- Barry Goldberg

Magdalena

Quote from: Randy on May 17, 2020, 02:20:57 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 17, 2020, 02:29:46 AM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 11:53:07 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 11:13:16 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 09:46:23 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on May 16, 2020, 09:21:54 PM
Quote from: Randy on May 16, 2020, 06:12:56 PM
... But as long as I can, I'd like to keep my mind out of a fog.

Fog induced by beer I don't mind however. ;)

:superman:
Wait. What?


:grin:

:lol: Did I confuse you?
No, I just thought you were asking for a beer, if I could, I would come to the rescue and bring you a beer.   :devil2:
I don't mind fog induced by beer, either.
:grin:
I'd take it too. I'm half tempted to get my caretaker to get me one but my taste buds aren't working correctly so I have no idea how it would taste. Give me a few and I won't care. :lol:
"Give me a few and I won't care."
Ha!  :lol:
I think that's how I ended up with  a malt liquor in my hand at the end of the day, the other day.
:lol: Yeah, I can well relate. Out of curiosity, what is your favorite beer? Mine is either Guinness or Yuengling Black & Tan depending on what I feel like.
Well, Randy, I like beer, but I prefer a glass of red wine. I enjoy a beer with seafood, and I enjoy a nice red wine with good friends. 
:secrets1: ...Or alone.

:grin:

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant