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Started by Biggus Dickus, March 08, 2016, 10:38:04 PM

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No one

Why does the almighty have to be human like in any way, shape, or form?


I'd imagine Raps, if the tallywhacker hypothesis holds any water, said tallywhacker is used for probing Uranus.

Magdalena

I like Uranus jokes. ;D

Quote from: No one on August 08, 2022, 11:16:30 PMWhy does the almighty have to be human like in any way, shape, or form?

I'd imagine Raps, if the tallywhacker hypothesis holds any water, said tallywhacker is used for probing Uranus.

Yes.That's a mighty huge human looking god.  :-\

It would have to be a huge tallywhacker if it's probing Uranus.
Think about it...
Did you know that aroud 63 to 64 earths fit in Uranus?

 ;D

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Asmodean

Quote from: Magdalena on August 08, 2022, 08:59:02 PMAnd more important, if he does, what does he use it for?
Rape. Or didn't you hear about how Jesus came to be? Yep. the prophet is an rape baby.

Quote from: No one on August 08, 2022, 11:16:30 PMWhy does the almighty have to be human like in any way, shape, or form?
The proper Almighty is gray and round-ish and has eyebrows sticking out and shall smite a Smart car with Luxembourg... In no particular order, see if He shall not! Mercedes-Benz displeased Him with it.
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on July 25, 2013, 08:18:52 PM
In Asmo's grey lump,
wrath and dark clouds gather force.
Luxembourg trembles.

Magdalena

Quote from: Asmodean on August 09, 2022, 02:50:08 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on August 08, 2022, 08:59:02 PMAnd more important, if he does, what does he use it for?
Rape. Or didn't you hear about how Jesus came to be? Yep. the prophet is a rape baby.

I'll be god's attorney and I'll use the holy book to defend him.:studious:

He didn't rape her
because she didn't scream sufficiently.

If she was being raped and he succeeds in raping her, and she didn't scream, she bears at least some guilt.

-- Deuteronomy.

Besides, Gabriel warned her.
 :reading:   

So, god, bless his holy penis, is innocent.

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Asmodean

Indeed. :smilenod:

Also, it was immaterial at the time, so totally nothing happened.
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on July 25, 2013, 08:18:52 PM
In Asmo's grey lump,
wrath and dark clouds gather force.
Luxembourg trembles.

Recusant

Quote from: Magdalena on August 09, 2022, 06:45:21 PMI'll be god's attorney and I'll use the holy book to defend him.:studious:

He didn't rape her
because she didn't scream sufficiently.

If she was being raped and he succeeds in raping her, and she didn't scream, she bears at least some guilt.

-- Deuteronomy.

Besides, Gabriel warned her.
 :reading:   

So, god, bless his holy penis, is innocent.

Some splendid ecclesiastic lawyering there. No jury of angels would vote to convict.  :lol:
"Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration — courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and above all, love of the truth."
— H. L. Mencken


Magdalena

Quote from: Recusant on August 10, 2022, 05:19:22 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on August 09, 2022, 06:45:21 PMI'll be god's attorney and I'll use the holy book to defend him.:studious:

He didn't rape her
because she didn't scream sufficiently.

If she was being raped and he succeeds in raping her, and she didn't scream, she bears at least some guilt.

-- Deuteronomy.

Besides, Gabriel warned her.
 :reading:   

So, god, bless his holy penis, is innocent.

Some splendid ecclesiastic lawyering there. No jury of angels would vote to convict.  :lol:
;D

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Magdalena

Quote from: Asmodean on August 09, 2022, 06:50:47 PMIndeed. :smilenod:

Also, it was immaterial at the time, so totally nothing happened.

[Holy]--mother --fucker.

Poor Mary.
So she was fucked by the law, god, and the holy spirit.
Figuratively speaking. 
And literally, I think.
:notsure:

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Magdalena

One more thing.

Quote from: Asmodean on August 09, 2022, 02:50:08 PM... Yep. the prophet is an rape baby.

And the "other holy prophet" was a child abuser/rapist.

QuoteWhat happened between Muhammad and Aisha?

Aisha, daughter of Abu-Bakr was a beautiful little girl. Muhammad married her when he was fifty-three years old and she was only six years old. He had intercourse with her when she was nine years old. (Wives of the Prophet, pages 57-61).

So much holiness, everywhere.

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Asmodean

Quote from: Magdalena on August 10, 2022, 06:06:42 AMAnd the "other holy prophet" was a child abuser/rapist.
Indeed? :thoughtful:

...Why, yes! Oh, the implications!  ;D
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on July 25, 2013, 08:18:52 PM
In Asmo's grey lump,
wrath and dark clouds gather force.
Luxembourg trembles.

No one

Mary was asking for it. Everytime Peter used his peter, Mary called out
another's name.

Side note, jehovah suffers from premature ejaculation.

It may have taken 7 days to create the earth, it took less than 7 seconds to create Jesus.

Magdalena

I think we should create a "Blasphemous Sentiments" thread.
—You know, get it out of our system.
:notsure:

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

No one

I run on blasphemy. I don't think I could ever get it out of my system.

Magdalena

Quote from: No one on August 10, 2022, 07:43:16 PMI run on blasphemy. I don't think I could ever get it out of my system.
Good.

 ;)

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant