Loneliness

[Cecilie]

Cecile are you on Skype? I have a few net friends who use it and it's almost as good as having somebody around.

I have it, but I don't really use it.

[Twentythree]

I’m very sorry to hear that anyone is going through something like this. Loneliness is tough especially if it comes upon you suddenly, through loss or circumstances that you could not control. But, I am a firm believer in shaping your own reality. Just like any state of being you can choose to be lonely, or you can choose not to be lonely. If you look at it the right way there are hundreds of like minded people right here  that have sympathy for you and want to help you out. That in itself is evidence of not being alone.

Spending time physically with other people is another matter. In order to spend time with other people though you have to make the choice to actively seek it. As we get older social opportunities seem to diminish, but that is only because our level of involvement becomes more self centered. Not in a bad way of course but we tend to focus more on our close relationships like wives/girlfriends, children, family and perhaps a few close friends. If we find ourselves separated from some or all of those social circumstances as the result of a relocation or loss it becomes very difficult to expose ourselves to the trials, the possible rejections and the vulnerability of forming new relationships. But it has to be done. How do you eat a whale? One bite at a time. So take some time and think about what you enjoy doing, not only what you enjoy doing now but what you’ve enjoyed doing all your life. Maybe there are things that you’ve always wanted to do but have let slip by. In my experience anything you were involved in as a kid you can be involved in as an adult. Sports, games, music, art take a look online and see if you can find groups or clubs that you would be interested in checking out. The biggest thing that you’ll have to do and probably the hardest thing to overcome will be just getting out there and trying stuff out. Sure it’ll suck at first. You might feel shy and embarrassed but just like you had to do as a child, you have to open yourself up. It’s not surprising that there are a lot more people like you out there than you think. And think about this; just as you are seeking you are also being sought, I found you here on the pages of this forum, we’ve never met, don’t really know anything about each other, yet I’m giving you this advice, we’re  clearly of the same cognitive ilk. But, in order to get this response, in order to prompt these words you had to open yourself up. You had to give a little, you had to be vulnerable and honest in order to get honesty in return.

[Ulver]

I'm so sorry, Lost, you must be quite strong.

I have battled a great deal of loneliness, as a person who doesn't enjoy many types of people but still wishes to be social. I have found that staying busy, even if it is mindless behavior, is best. I focus on reading, weight loss, forums, youtube, work, school, being creative, cleaning. Ugh that's it   it's hard, but luckily I know I wouldn't like the kind of friends I would be offered around here.

[Tank]

I'm so sorry, Lost, you must be quite strong.

I have battled a great deal of loneliness, as a person who doesn't enjoy many types of people but still wishes to be social. I have found that staying busy, even if it is mindless behavior, is best. I focus on reading, weight loss, forums, youtube, work, school, being creative, cleaning. Ugh that's it  :hmm: ?

[JoeBobSmith]

you will meet friends eventually

[The Magic Pudding]

That nice rabbit must have you feeling better already.
All you have to do now is stop listening to that nasty metal music and find some nice soft fluffy music.  How about Justin Beeber, he looks soft and fluffy.  I've probably gone too far now, I don't want you to question if a life with Beeber is worth living.  We'll have to take this gradually.

[Cecilie]

That nice rabbit must have you feeling better already.
All you have to do now is stop listening to that nasty metal music and find some nice soft fluffy music.  How about Justin Beeber, he looks soft and fluffy.  I've probably gone too far now, I don't want you to question if a life with Beeber is worth living.  We'll have to take this gradually.

I'm starting to think you want me to kill myself by suggesting that I start listening to Justin Bieber. I'm on to you.

[The Magic Pudding]

I'm starting to think you want me to kill myself by suggesting that I start listening to Justin Bieber. I'm on to you.

I've found it hard to use my keyboard after reading this, how could you think such a thing?
Did I ever tell you mopeds are a reasonable zombie transportation, but 750cc's are entry level for the living?
Have you considered base jumping?
Perhaps skin diving in waters adjacent a seal colony?
I here the view from atop of K2 is pretty.

You don't like Bieber hmmm, how about the proclaimers?

I'm on my way from misery to happiness today
I'm on my way from misery to happiness today
I'm on my way to what I want from this world
And years from now you'll make it to the next world
And everything that you receive up yonder
Is what you gave to me the day I wandered

That's sure to move a lonesome person to a murderous mood, doesn't this prove my good intent?

[Cecilie]

You know, I've never been much fan of pudding, but...

[Ulver]

I'm so sorry, Lost, you must be quite strong.

I have battled a great deal of loneliness, as a person who doesn't enjoy many types of people but still wishes to be social. I have found that staying busy, even if it is mindless behavior, is best. I focus on reading, weight loss, forums, youtube, work, school, being creative, cleaning. Ugh that's it  :hmm: ?

I don't mean here as in HAF!  :/

[Tank]

I'm so sorry, Lost, you must be quite strong.

I have battled a great deal of loneliness, as a person who doesn't enjoy many types of people but still wishes to be social. I have found that staying busy, even if it is mindless behavior, is best. I focus on reading, weight loss, forums, youtube, work, school, being creative, cleaning. Ugh that's it  :hmm: ?

I don't mean here as in HAF!  :/

Ah! That makes sense now, my bad I didn't realise you were talking about real life!  

[Cecilie]

Ah! That makes sense now, my bad I didn't realise you were talking about real life!  

[Tank]

Ah! That makes sense now, my bad I didn't realise you were talking about real life!  

[Asmodean]

Dealing with loneliness by ignoring it most of the time. Works for me... Sort of.

[ZombiePhysics]

I've often felt lonely, even while playing video games, so I usually have some sort of Let's Play, rant, or comedy routine in the background which keeps me less lonely. I certainly don't feel less paranoid & I need to look over my shoulder constantly, unless I'm really really involved in something. Sometimes I feel this overwhelming atmosphere of negativity looming over the area. That's the best way I can describe it. Anyone know what I mean? For the record, I do take Prozac for depression.