What Am I?

[Ultima22689]

A black atheist from the South Side? An anomaly, is what you are!

In all seriousness, though, you're already doing all the right things. being a member here is a good place to begin, and other avenues will open up to you as time goes by. You'll find ways to connect with people who think the way you do, and it isn't something that you really need to worry about.

I know right? Too bad it's not a job qualification, i'd get hired in a heartbeat!

Thanks mate, it's good to know because I really do feel like an alien that crash landed on Earth, more precisely 86th and Prairie.

[Ã¥scertain]

disclaimer: I am intoxicated during the writing of this post, I have drank a large amount of alcohol as I despaired of how alien I am to my peers and the majority of society,

What Am I? From a scientific point of view, this is simple, i'm a Homo Sapien. That sums me up pretty well I guess but anyone who knows Homo Sapiens as a species knows we are far more complex than that. Our brains are a marvel of evolution, the majority of the human genome is the blueprints of the brain. My name is Devin, I was born and raised in Chicago, Illinois. I'm a a black male by my environment, my heritage is a kaleidoscope of the many different races that are part of the human race however the culture I was raised in is that of the black man. I lived on the south side of Chicago the majority of my life. In the past 5 years I ventured out into the beautiful lands of America. I've learned much and matured greatly since I left however as of the past month I have returned to my home, I hope for a sense of stability here.  People have always told me since I could remember that i'm incredibly smart. I've always noticed a disparity in my own intellect and my peers. I am also vastly different. Despite growing up on the south side of Chicago, surrounded by ebonics, rap and anti-intellectualism I am the polar opposite of my environment. I don't listen to any form of rap or R&B or rap. I enjoy progressive metal and i'm a transhumanist. My brother is intelligent as well but behavior, personality and most of what defines him is typical of a black male from Chicago. I have ADHD, i'm schizo-effective, bipolar and supposedly have Asperger's syndrome, the diagnosis is new and my family still disputes it, I can't be sure but most of the symptoms and signs of it resonate with my life.

I don't understand why I am such an anomaly among my family. Why am I so different? There is no reason for it. I don't get it, it is something that I think about every day. Is there any scientific reason I could be the way I am. I have yet to meet others like myself. I am a complete contradiction to my environment and culture. Every day I wonder why this is is and it eludes me. I don't know what to make of it, can anyone offer advice or opinion?

 being black,and young, I can relate to a number of things you've mentioned here. Before responding directly to what you've asked here though, I must point some things out that throw up red flags in my mind.
You stated early in your statement that you believe yourself to be particularly different, but this is not nessicarily the case. Your desire to learn isn'nt at all offbeat. Enviornmental and social tinkering can be attributed to the large number of signifigantly "ignorant" black people in your enviornment. Systematic manipulation put in place even way back during the seeds of slavery have lingering effects to this day. There will be exceptions to the design but the goal is that they come in such small numbers that they become insignifigant. If I cant identify with my ethic cultrue because is is destructive - yet can't ginuwinley connect with that of another culture, Im left with an identity crisis. Understand that everyone has the capacity to elevate learning they simply must desire to. Whats popularized in Black America is destruction- this is by design. There is no such thing as "Typical" and I would advise erradcating that from vocabluary when its in reference to human beings. Normal doesn't exist. Large amounts of people follow the social structre - this is all you are seeing.

   I aslo can't understand why you eqate Rap music with anti-intellectualism and go on to say you enjoy Metal - implying a contrast. Music - though, is one of the main tools of which is used to control people - aside form religion (hence the reason 80% of Black Americans are Christain) I think if you are willing to listen you can find art in the genre but this requires strying from mainstream. Again, we see the pattern of whats popular- advocating destructive concepts.

You are encountering carefully manipulated semantics that have been put into place in America since slavery. you might interprate this wrong - which is expected. Im not meaning to assert that you arent special - you most certainly are - understand though that these socail dysfuntions are not, in essence, reflections of Black Americans. They are reflections of institutionalized racism. i would advise you not blame yourself for not embracing a destructive lifestyle Continue to strive for the worldoutside the box - the box the system 'Jacked' for you instead of allowing you to build a proper foundation  of self.

[excuse speliing/grammar]

[notself]

Slavery in America was a peculiar institution not because it enslaved people but for what it did beyond forced servitude.  Slaves had their cultured eradicated, their names changed, their families ruptured, their language forbidden, their religion destroyed, their music and art eradicated.  They were not allowed to read and anyone teaching them to read was imprisoned.  They were not allowed to form permanent relationships as parents were sold away from their children, husbands sold separately from wives.  Christianity became a cultural force that slaves and sharecroppers and miners could cling to.  

Slavery is not some long ago institution.  Former slaves were interviewed between 1932 and 1975.  One cannot expect a group of people so damaged in their lives and in their history to adjust in two or three generations.  The binding force of a new American black history is the Church and music.  As an atheist you are perceived not only as rejecting Christianity but rejecting the culture.   Ultima22689 be patient with your feelings of separateness and with those who give you a tough time about being an atheist.  

Here is a link to the interviews of slaves.  http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/voices/
Here is the link to Obama's speech on race.  http://www.npr.org/templates/story/stor ... d=88478467

Christian music and song inspired and fueled the civil rights movement.  You don't have to believe in god, but appreciate what religion did to make the Civil Rights Movement a turning point in American History.
http://video.pbs.org/video/1410865290

If you want to belong, here is an organization you may want to look into.  http://www.illinoisnaacp.org/chicagosou ... index.html  The old black people in this organization spent their youth protesting along with the old white hippies from the Unitarian Universalists.

[Tank]

@notself

What a wonderfully sensible post.

[notself]

@notself

What a wonderfully sensible post.

Thank you.  

[Jestone89]

I think the best subject for that is Who am i?

well we are all creature of God in his own image and likeness.

we have our own purpose in life why we are here in this world.

our own objective is to search for that objective.

as we go on in our life we slowly know what is the reason behind.

just believe in your self and God will do the rest.

[Asmodean]

just believe in your self and God will do the rest.

[The Magic Pudding]

we have our own purpose in life why we are here in this world.

our own objective is to search for that objective.

Our purpose is search for our purpose?
Well that clears it all up.
I'm at peace now Hallelujah.

[PoopShoot]

we are all creature of God in his own image and likeness.

What does this mean?  Is god a primate?

we have our own purpose in life why we are here in this world.

our own objective is to search for that objective.

Then why the need for god?

as we go on in our life we slowly know what is the reason behind.

Sounds reasonable.

just believe in your self and God will do the rest.

So I can just sit at home and let god do everything for me?  I've found that in my life whenever something gets dons, it's been because I bothered to do something about it and whenever i left something to god, nothing ever happened.  It's almost as if he didn't do anything at all.

[notself]

...just believe in your self and God will do the rest.

Tell that to the people in Dafur.

[Cite134]

...just believe in your self and God will do the rest.

Tell that to the people in Dafur.

[Ultima22689]

Thank you notself and åscertain. I will most certainly reflect on your words.

Jestone, I know you mean well but i'll pass on God, thanks anyway though, I think that's the problem with many of my black brothers and sisters, they just believe in God and expect he/she to do the rest.

[i_am_i]

Hey, Ultima22689, you know what you are? You're a human being and, yes, it's pretty weird.

[Draconicstarz88]

What Am I?

Your a regular jack off like the rest of us. LMAO!

 :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:

[Ã¥scertain]

What Am I?

Your a regular jack off like the rest of us. LMAO!

 :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:  :bananacolor:

...I forgot to laugh