God is like the new Crack (let the battle begin)

[Asmodean Prime]

Come on in. The party has begun.

Jesus is rallying the troops for the final strike has yet begun. Those who are not slayed will be sacrificed for God's demands. After the battle of both worlds is over, those who are not killed from the Sacrification will be burning in the pits of hell.

Meanwhile, Jesus along with his band, "Jesus and the Crucifictions" will play a concert so bad-ass, it would beat any played in the past including Woodstock, Bonaroo, etc.

Armed with his 200 String Double-Neck Gibson SG Custom, Jesus will rock your ass off. Along with his axe, his voice has the power of a thousand Megawatts which will swipe you off your feet. Satan on drums will play 1000 beats per minute which will deffen even the pure of heart. But best of all, Bill Clinton on swanky bass will definetly have you banging your head off.

Unknown to stage directors, Jesus at the end will rev up his Motorcycle and go through a ten Mack Truck Jump with Flaming Rings on either side and do five backflips mid-air.

All concert-goers will then bow-down and accept his title as Best Damn Rock God Ever and will go through the Gates of Heaven.

The Prophecy will be revealed soon...  

[Squid]

Oookay.

Dream Evil did a song called Heavy Metal Jesus.

[donkeyhoty]

At least this one is moderately creative.

[WeAreLegion]

Moderately creative? You're giving them too much credit.

[SteveS]

I did like "Cheezits" of Nazareth.  I guess he couldn't find anything clever to substitute for Nazareth ... oh well, neither can I.

[Piemaster]

I laughed