God Says

[Old Seer]

My dog would be a better god than God!

That's quite true. Almost anyone I know would be a better God than ---- God.

[Anne D.]

God says you're all to send me money so that I can spread his word. Be generous, dig deep, fellow HAFers.

[Asmodean]

Yes! The LORD needs money!

Omnipotence is bloody expensive.

[The Magic Pudding.]

God, I have an issue with these cheap biscuits, they break easy, I think I should be able to eat more if they're are broken.



Thanks god.
God says broken biscuits only have half the fat/sugar 'n stuff by weight that whole biscuits do.

[MarcusA]

God says, Go forth and multiply, therefore it's an orgy that he wants.

[Bluenose]

Well, to be brutally honest and serious for a moment:  god doesn't actually say anything.  Nonexistent beings don't talk.

[Icarus]

God actually meant to have his subjects learn the multiplication tables up to twelve. 

Surely he was not encouraging us to become Swingers.

[MarcusA]

God says, Kill and die. I say, Fuck you.

[billy rubin]

god says

pineapple pizza is okay. artichoke pizza is not okay.

[MarcusA]

god says

pineapple pizza is okay. artichoke pizza is not okay.

Personally, I like pineapple on a pizza, so that's okay of God.

[MarcusA]

God says nothing to Santa and the elves.

[Dark Lightning]

God actually meant to have his subjects learn the multiplication tables up to twelve. 

Surely he was not encouraging us to become Swingers.

I'm sure that the Babylonians disagree, since they used hexadecimal.

[MarcusA]

God says, Invent the clock, so the Greeks pinched the idea from the Babylonians.

[MarcusA]

God says, Enjoy hell. I say, Old man, you are long gone.

[MarcusA]

God says, You are God. I say, I am a man.