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Started by iplaw, July 28, 2006, 09:13:35 PM

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iplaw

QuoteHey, if I don't know about it, it can't hurt me.
Something tells me you're making this argument to win a debate.  If not you have the most pragmatic view of love and sex I have ever heard from a woman; something not very romantic at the very least.

My wife always tells me I'm not romantic enough.  I should have married someone who thinks like you and I could be my primal male pig self without a second thought. :wink:

Wallow in tons of pornography because those fantasies are good, waste my time at strip joints for the same reason, and not even have to worry about desiring my wife cause I can think about all of that other stuff when I'm in bed with her.

No thanks. Singularly desiring my wife above any other woman sounds better to me and probably to her too, not to mention it's a tad more respectful on my part.

Court

#1
I'm really not making that argument to win. I'm not that competitive. :)
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

iplaw

#2
QuoteHonestly, how am I going to know if my boyfriend or husband is thinking about someone else in bed...Of course it wouldn't make me feel good to know about it, but I never would, so it doesn't matter...
People don't usually find out until it's too late and their partner has moved on either mentally or physically which usually means dealing with rejection on top of heartbreak.

QuoteMy boyfriend and I are very similar and we both avoid mushy, "romantic" crap because it's insincere and stupid.
My wife and every other woman who loved the movie "The Notebook" would probably want to slap you for that comment. :wink:

Asmodean Prime

#3
court, I don't think of women as a 'different' species, just more suited to some roles in society than men.  Come on, even in nature - if a woman carries a child in her womb for nine months, surely she is going to be more 'connected' to her offspring than a man?   Agree with it  or not, there are certain roles that are more suited to women, and some that are suited to men.   anyone who denies this , I think, is just blinkered and pursuiing their own agenda, and I would like to hear your views on this.

Court

#4
You already have heard my views on it. You're just not a good listener. I've told you how I felt about your stereotypical views towards women and their "roles" in society. Feel free to peruse my earlier posts, but I'm not stating it again.
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

Court

#5
Quote from: "iplaw"
QuoteHonestly, how am I going to know if my boyfriend or husband is thinking about someone else in bed...Of course it wouldn't make me feel good to know about it, but I never would, so it doesn't matter...
People don't usually find out until it's too late and their partner has moved on either mentally or physically which usually means dealing with rejection on top of heartbreak.

Oh, geez. We're never going to come to a compromise on this one. :))
When I think back, I don't wish it had happened any differently, but I know it would have been much healthier for me to dwell on this relatively immoral thought, because I would have realized much faster that it was real. I couldn't know that I was in love with him when I wouldn't let myself contemplate it.
Those aren't the only two examples, just the biggest. Sometimes, we need to be able to ponder the immoral thoughts to find out who we really are.

In the situations we've been discussing, if a person finds themselves constantly fantasizing about someone other than their partner, they need to dwell on it. If they do, they may realize that they don't belong with that person or aren't sexually attracted to them. And it's much kinder to break something off earlier than later.

Quote from: "iplaw"
QuoteMy boyfriend and I are very similar and we both avoid mushy, "romantic" crap because it's insincere and stupid.
My wife and every other woman who loved the movie "The Notebook" would probably want to slap you for that comment. :wink:

Yeah, I know. I liked The Notebook, too, but I wouldn't want all of that "romance" in my own life. It's just cute to watch.
And, as I said, it's unique to every person. For your wife, that kind of romance isn't insincere. If I were to be that kind of romantic, though, I would have to be faking it. :)

edited for typos
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

iplaw

#6
Needless to say I see your position on relationships as quite mechanical and unpleasant. I could offer a response, but it would be a waste of both of our time so I'm just going to let what I have said previously stand.  That's it for me this week.

MommaSquid

#7
Sorry this is late; I had things to do.

Quote from: "MommaSquid"How are the lusting and the act equal?

Quote from: "iplaw"WHERE did I make that argument? NOWHERE!!!

Umm…here:

Quote from: "iplaw"...Christ explicitly stated that if you committ adultery in your heart with a woman it's as if you did it in the flesh.  

And I believe your dear and fluffy lord took care of it in this manner:  

Matthew 5:28 (New International Version)
28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart

Link

I don't see how the thought is the same as committing the act.  

Quote from: "iplaw"How many women here like the thought of their husbands or boyfriends thinking of other women when the have sex?

It is preferable to cheating.  Sometimes I pretend my husband is Brad Pitt, that doesn’t mean I’d actually sleep with Brad.

iplaw

#8
QuoteAnd I believe your dear and fluffy lord took care of it in this manner:
Again, my time here is going to be short if we can't begin to show a little more respect for each other's beliefs.  I think you can agree I have been cordial and thoughtful in my responses to virtually everyone here.  

The key point is "looks at a woman lustfully" re-read my previous post to Jassman.  The equivalence argument was never made.

MommaSquid

#9
The "dear and fluffy lord" part was a movie quote.

You have my humble apologies.

MommaSquid

#10
Quote from: "iplaw"…show a little more respect for each other's beliefs.  

I respect your right to have whatever religious beliefs you want, but I don’t respect your religious beliefs.
It’s a subtle difference, but one worth noting.


Quote from: "iplaw"The equivalence argument was never made.

I believe it was.

Matthew 5:28 (New International Version)
28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart

That seems pretty equivalent to me.

Court

#11
Quote from: "iplaw"Needless to say I see your position on relationships as quite mechanical and unpleasant. I could offer a response, but it would be a waste of both of our time so I'm just going to let what I have said previously stand.  That's it for me this week.

Really? I find that pretty interesting. How, exactly, is my position mechanical? I honestly want to know; I don't often get the chance to talk about relationships with people who don't think love should simply consist of jewelry, flattery, and sex.
I think you may be getting the wrong impression about me. What about my views on relationships is unpleasant? Perhaps I can clarify. (I don't expect a response until Monday, but I usually skip the weekends as well. :))

Alright, people, I'm ready for the truth. Do I have dysfunctional views on relationships? You're not going to offend me (unless you're onlyme, because he manages it constantly)...
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

Jassman

#12
I think that your view on relationships is dead on. I can't seem to see it any differently... I'd like to actually post something of substance, but I'm really tired right now and should quit while I'm ahead (no spelling errors yet I don't think).
[size=75]"You ever notice how people who believe in creationism look really unevolved?" -Bill Hicks[/size]

[size=75]I'm drowning in the fear of gods. The more I see the less I want. I was not raised

MommaSquid

#13
Quote from: "Court"Do I have dysfunctional views on relationships?

Not from where I stand.  I'm not high maintenance in the "romance" department.  For example, I don't understand women who pitch a fit when they don't get flowers for Valentine's Day.  I want my husband to give me flowers when he wants to give them to me, not just because the calendar says he should.  

Romance means different things to different people.  The ability to be myself is the most romantic thing my husband can give me.  Luckily, I get that on a daily basis.  Open, honest communication is sexy.




Maybe we should split this topic again.

Big Mac

#14
Quote from: "MommaSquid"
Quote from: "iplaw"…show a little more respect for each other's beliefs.  

I respect your right to have whatever religious beliefs you want, but I don’t respect your religious beliefs.
It’s a subtle difference, but one worth noting.


Quote from: "iplaw"The equivalence argument was never made.

I believe it was.

Matthew 5:28 (New International Version)
28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart

That seems pretty equivalent to me.

We interrupt this discussion (the term usage here is quite loose like Pam Anderson) to bring you a joke.

What do you call 20,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?

A GOOD START!
Quote from: "PoopShoot"And what if pigs shit candy?