Marriage

[OldGit]

i agree with this. why is everyone so against adults doing as they please if they are happy and consenting?

Seconded.  As the lady said, 'Does it really matter what these affectionate people do — so long as they don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses!'

there is no such thing as traditional love or marriage.

Now there I disagree.  I don't want to force it on anyone, but I do recommend it from long experience.

[Sweetdeath]

i agree with this. why is everyone so against adults doing as they please if they are happy and consenting?

Seconded.  As the lady said, 'Does it really matter what these affectionate people do — so long as they don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses!'

there is no such thing as traditional love or marriage.

Now there I disagree.  I don't want to force it on anyone, but I do recommend it from long experience.

What do you consider traditional love?

Two people?
two people of the opposite sex , but same race?

We adapt and evolve as a society. I hope...

[OldGit]

No, SD, I'm sure love exists between same-sex couples, and is equally real and valid.  Race is not relevant here.

We adapt and evolve as a society. I hope...

We do, but that doesn't mean that none of the old realities exist any more.

[Asmodean]

Cohabitation. Much better, yes? Make a contract that states that should the warm and fuzzy go away, everyone retains what they paid for and all is golden, yes?

[Stevil]

there is no such thing as traditional love or marriage.

Now there I disagree.  I don't want to force it on anyone, but I do recommend it from long experience.

Prior to organised society, and the invention of marriage it would have been interesting to see how humans structured themselves.
Did we mate for life like some birds do?
Did we have an alpha male whom won the right to impregnate the pack?
Did we just have a free for all when women were in heat?

But of course we have rules now and social expectations and a tradition going as far back as the concept of marriage.

[DeterminedJuliet]

there is no such thing as traditional love or marriage.

Now there I disagree.  I don't want to force it on anyone, but I do recommend it from long experience.

Prior to organised society, and the invention of marriage it would have been interesting to see how humans structured themselves.
Did we mate for life like some birds do?
Did we have an alpha male whom won the right to impregnate the pack?
Did we just have a free for all when women were in heat?

But of course we have rules now and social expectations and a tradition going as far back as the concept of marriage.

From what I've read, serial monogamy seems to be the closest to our "natural" way of doing things. As in, people tended to form monogamous bonds, but they usually didn't last forever. So, people would pick partners based on their current life stage (when you're young, you find someone who excites you; when you want to reproduce, you find someone who's a good parent; when you're older, you find someone who's a good companion. That sort of thing). It makes sense to me, because I think a structured idea of marriage came about as a means to try and keep people from wandering apart when they might otherwise be inclined to.

[En_Route]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

[Tank]

My co worker Jessica is constantly complaining about her abusive, muslim husband. Oh yeah- then why did you marry him , bitch? Argh,

I take it your not Jessica's biggest fan then?

Not really XD
she has been working for 8 months longer than me, but is so slow. She 'looooves' surveying men. (I think she is a bit slutty in that aspect as she is always flaunting herself and wearing way too much make up.)
I usually dont wear make up to work, as i use my personally for marketing, not my awesome looks. :F

Just a question SD. Would it be acceptable for this woman to refer to you as a 'Flirty Dyke who lust looooooves surveying women'?

Because if you do not find it acceptable you are being hypocritical in that you feel free to use offensive terminology/language to describe other people. Do you not look at women? Do you avert your eyes from sexy women. You say you use your personality rather than make up i.e. you flirt.  

SD sometimes what you write does make you look rather unaccepting of other people and very judgemental. Being in a somewhat oppressed minority I would have thought you would be more accepting other people's individuality.

[fester30]

I'm not a huge fan of marriage as a reality, but as a concept doesn't seem so bad.  Two people stay together to raise their children and share effort of making a living.  Seems that would be the best for all.  In reality, however, it doesn't work out that way often enough to make it a recognized institution.  I'm married for two reasons.  1.  Benefits and rights that are given to married couples and spouses.  2.  My wife has an old-fashioned view of relationships and marriage, and I am completely happy staying with her and having her company.  I was fine marrying her because it fulfilled something she needed, while we both fulfill each other's needs on every level.

I don't think it should be considered a contract for life, especially since it can be broken at any time.  I like Mexico's new idea... 2 year marriage contracts.  If it doesn't work out, you don't have to spend a bunch of money on a divorce, the marriage dissolves after 2 years automatically if it is not renewed. 

[DeterminedJuliet]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

I agree that overt sexuality in the workplace can be inappropriate.

[Sweetdeath]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

I agree that overt sexuality in the workplace can be inappropriate.

well, first i want to say i really, really wasnt saying she herself was a slut in any way. I understand i do word things very wrong sometimes. >_< i'm not sure why this happens. I apologize for my misunderstandings and don't want to stretch that subject out any further. It's  not necessary.

Well, this coworker is not a nice person. Doesn't make it right for anyone (me included) to call her names, which i don't in person or anything. To me, she is not a good person to work with though. I work in marketing , and i have to reach a quota every single day.

She is not only late for work 4/5 times a week, she tends to come in , speaking so casually about her personal life, then asking in return for information on yours. Then she'll speak of religion constantly.

Our boss is buddhist, and she is a very cool and laid back person. She NEVER brings up her religion or religious beliefs ever in the work place.

But this girl jessica will constantly go on about how god made us and how she is so grateful to be on god's earth. How we are all his children. And  i am really biting my tongue so hard not to say anything, or i will just get off and leave the area. It drives me crazy. I mean, i wish there seriously was a real against speaking religion at work. She KNOWS I'm an atheist and none of that 'i'm so proud to be god's children' doesn't apply to me, but she will still go on about it.


So that's a big peeve. She doesn't work (she is the slowest of the group) and she loves to spout religious nonsense. Her as a person drives me mad. Like, she is the type of person i would never willingly be around.

So, that's all. 

[Sweetdeath]

I'm not a huge fan of marriage as a reality, but as a concept doesn't seem so bad.  Two people stay together to raise their children and share effort of making a living.  Seems that would be the best for all.  In reality, however, it doesn't work out that way often enough to make it a recognized institution.  I'm married for two reasons.  1.  Benefits and rights that are given to married couples and spouses.  2.  My wife has an old-fashioned view of relationships and marriage, and I am completely happy staying with her and having her company.  I was fine marrying her because it fulfilled something she needed, while we both fulfill each other's needs on every level.

I don't think it should be considered a contract for life, especially since it can be broken at any time.  I like Mexico's new idea... 2 year marriage contracts.  If it doesn't work out, you don't have to spend a bunch of money on a divorce, the marriage dissolves after 2 years automatically if it is not renewed. 

That's an interesting law.

[En_Route]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

I agree that overt sexuality in the workplace can be inappropriate.

For that reason, I always left my mankini at home.

[Ali]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

Well, I would agree that if whatever they are doing is detracting from the professionalism or focus of their of job, that's a problem (just as it would be a problem if instead of working, they were talking really loudly on their cell phone, or haning out on HAF instead of doing their work.   )  I'm just saying that in general, I am sick of society looking down on a woman for deciding that she can do whatever she wants with her own vagina.

[Sweetdeath]

Totally agree, DJ and Will.

I have no idea if this woman is a nice person or not, but what I do know is that I am OVER slut shaming.  Girls/Women that own their sexuality rock and more power to them.

I wouldn't personally ever employ the term slut, firstly because it implies a moral judgement. Have I ever mentioned that I don't do morals?
Secondly,  I also believe that slapping labels on people is reductive and  robs them of their complexity and humanity.
I dissent from the proposition however that a person of either gender who elects to create an impression of ready sexual availability in the workplace is advancing any cause or to adopt your hip parlance, Ms. Ali, that  they "rock"

Well, I would agree that if whatever they are doing is detracting from the professionalism or focus of their of job, that's a problem (just as it would be a problem if instead of working, they were talking really loudly on their cell phone, or haning out on HAF instead of doing their work.   )  I'm just saying that in general, I am sick of society looking down on a woman for deciding that she can do whatever she wants with her own vagina.

well, as i should of stated, i don't care if people are open with their sexuality, or proud-- whatever. But when you are using your body and wearing tons of make up to get 'work' done, then to me, it seems tacky.

I am all for women liberation and such, but too much sexuality at work just makes me uncomfortable. there are clubs and homes for that 

i am an extremely sexual person, but i don't bring it to work. I certainly don't need my sexual to get men to do surveys with me. I do my job professionally. Which is why at the end of the day, i get the quota done the fastest and get paid the most of everyone.