Author Topic: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents  (Read 351 times)

CleverName1219

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Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« on: September 04, 2010, 08:52:29 PM »
Hello everyone. My name is Melody and i'm new here. I went to a catholic school for 14 years and after 14 years of scrutinizing everything i had been taught and also developing a passion for the sciences, i came to the conclusion that religion is simply not for me. I'm 24 now.
My problem is this: I have a 3 year old daughter and her father left me when she was about 1. We have joint custody, until she starts school next year. He gets her every other week. He is non-religious but only out of disinterest. I am an atheist. We both agreed when she was born that we would raise her in a environment free of religion so she could form her own deductions as she got older. His family, however, are avid (and creepy) baptists. I'm pretty sure they had Mae (my daughter) baptized behind my back. Now that she is talking ALOT, it has been exposed to me that she also attends sunday school at church every sunday (obviously). Now she walks around my house talking about jesus and heaven and insists that we all pray before meals and bed, which i refuse to do. I have spoken to her father about it, and he just lies to me. He doesn't care what she is exposed to. She continues to go to this school and there is nothing i can do about it. I feel that 3 is far too young to be introducing religion to a child. This is brainwashing as far as i am concerned.
How can i combat this? They won't listen to me. So what can i tell me daughter to neutralize the poison they are feeding her? What can i tell her? More specifically: Since she is bringing all of this home to me, what can i teach her to bring home to them to let them know i'm not joking? This is not the only issue i have with these people. They put themselves before me as far as parental control goes and my daughter is so impressionable, she just goes along with whatever they tell her. I mean, i know at this church she goes to they give her candy when she prays (what a great way to hook a small child). How can i compete with this. Please help me. The topic of religion was one of the most important things i wanted to teach my child about. And they are sabotaging it for me.

notself

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Re: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2010, 12:23:40 AM »
Start reading to her from some of these books.

http://questioner.www2.50megs.com/Books ... ldren.html

http://www.parentingbeyondbelief.com/resources/


Your daughter most likely really enjoys Sunday School.  There are fun things to do, sometimes treats and lots of other little kids.  You need to provide something like these things for your daughter at home.  I don't know how much time you have but if you have atheist friends they can probably help.

Best wishes.

omfgzmariah

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Re: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2010, 07:33:19 AM »
Oh wow. I mean, it's like a story to her that answers questions that she doesn't even ask yet.
I would truly have no idea what to do in this situation.

But! Since you get full custody soon, maybe you should just humor the idea for now. Tell her they're just stories?
When school starts she'll soon forget.
You can't truly explain it to a three year old. And you really shouldn't use her as a tool to tell the grandparents what you think.

If you feel you should do something about it - the grandparents don't have custody like your ex does.
They don't have the "right" to do anything like that... I mean, you should really go have a grown up discussion with them.

Growing up God was an easy answer for my parents to answer my questions. I went to plenty of churches and thought I did believe.
Until I started thinking for myself. Don't think your daughter is going to become something you hate.


And sucks they're baptists, they're almost the weirdest. Like speaking in tongues. Uhhhhggg.

Kylyssa

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Re: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2010, 10:53:44 PM »
My suggestion is to get her a bunch of pretty children's books with Greek myths, Japanese and Chinese folktales, and assorted other myths and fairy-tales.  If she is exposed to a bunch of mythology, she'll learn to recognize mythology.

omfgzmariah

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Re: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2010, 11:24:35 PM »
Quote from: "Kylyssa"
My suggestion is to get her a bunch of pretty children's books with Greek myths, Japanese and Chinese folktales, and assorted other myths and fairy-tales.  If she is exposed to a bunch of mythology, she'll learn to recognize mythology.

Totally agree here.

notself

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Re: Toddler and uncooperative grandparents
« Reply #5 on: September 06, 2010, 02:20:59 AM »
There are these stories called Jataka Tales from that fun atheistic religion, Buddhism.  Jataka Tales are very similar to Aesop's Fables.

http://www.amazon.com/Twenty-Jataka-Tal ... pd_sim_b_2