Author Topic: Would you buy this car?  (Read 611 times)

Tank

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Would you buy this car?
« on: January 12, 2017, 06:18:21 AM »
Would you buy this car?

Hi! I have a great car. It's the best car there has ever been made.
Can I see the car please?
No! But trust me it's the best car ever made!
Have you seen the car?
Yes. It is beautiful!
Where is the car?
In my head!
Pardon. Did you say in your head?
Yes. It was marvellous I saw it when I went to the showroom last Sunday with all the other car salesmen.
But the car was there?
No. I saw it in my minds eye. It was so beautiful.
OK. How much does it cost?
Oh it's free. You just have to join the sales team.
So if I join the sales team I get a free car?
Yes. But you need to pay a subscription to join the team. It's not much just 10% of your earnings.
Ok. So I join the sales team and get a free car, but I have to pay a subscription?
Yes.
Ok. When do I get the car?
When you die.
What the fuck?
I have the owners manual and it says you get the greatest car ever built, for free, subject to a weekly subscription to be on the sales team, when you die.
Please leave.

At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.
Well imagine it's a preacher trying to sell you a religion and you'll see why I'm an atheist.
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Bad Penny II

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #1 on: January 12, 2017, 06:37:45 AM »
At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.

Not so hasty Mr Presumption.
What colours does it come in?
Oh, oh, my, and who really cares

Gloucester

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #2 on: January 12, 2017, 07:21:28 AM »
Would you buy this car?

Hi! I have a great car. It's the best car there has ever been made.
Can I see the car please?
No! But trust me it's the best car ever made!
Have you seen the car?
Yes. It is beautiful!
Where is the car?
In my head!
Pardon. Did you say in your head?
Yes. It was marvellous I saw it when I went to the showroom last Sunday with all the other car salesmen.
But the car was there?
No. I saw it in my minds eye. It was so beautiful.
OK. How much does it cost?
Oh it's free. You just have to join the sales team.
So if I join the sales team I get a free car?
Yes. But you need to pay a subscription to join the team. It's not much just 10% of your earnings.
Ok. So I join the sales team and get a free car, but I have to pay a subscription?
Yes.
Ok. When do I get the car?
When you die.
What the fuck?
I have the owners manual and it says you get the greatest car ever built, for free, subject to a weekly subscription to be on the sales team, when you die.
Please leave.

At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.
Well imagine it's a preacher trying to sell you a religion and you'll see why I'm an atheist.

Until I got to the "when you die" bit I thought the car salesman was Trump!

Lot of American's bought that model, despite it being made of rhetoric and fantasy.

So, yes, guess a lot will buy the other one as well . . .
Tomorrow is precious, don't ruin it by fouling up today.

Recusant

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #3 on: January 12, 2017, 08:29:04 AM »
Hmm, I didn't see anything about recruits being required to believe in the car.  ;)
"Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration — courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and above all, love of the truth."
— H. L. Mencken


Arturo

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #4 on: January 12, 2017, 12:20:34 PM »
I have a 2001 model car and I work for Uber. In May Uber will be updating the standard for all their cars under their employment to be 2002 or newer. They do this every year. Then they sent me a text saying I have to put a decal on my car because of a new state law. Uh, no thx. I know how decals get stuck to your car and the only way to get them off is to apply heat which will not only get the decal off, it will mess up your paint job.
But, uh...well there it is.


Arturo

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #5 on: January 12, 2017, 12:27:28 PM »

Until I got to the "when you die" bit I thought the car salesman was Trump!

Lot of American's bought that model, despite it being made of rhetoric and fantasy.

So, yes, guess a lot will buy the other one as well . . .

I think a lot of his nonsense was anecdote and that's why people bought into him. People believe things easier when it conforms to what they already think is truth. My Aunt for example, said "I think he has a lot of good ideas" and goes on to reference that Politicians only work to make a name for them self. But she doesn't know anything about Politicians besides what she sees on the news.
But, uh...well there it is.


No one

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #6 on: January 12, 2017, 12:58:43 PM »
Personally, I wouldn't even so to this dealership.

Tank

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #7 on: January 12, 2017, 01:14:47 PM »
At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.

Not so hasty Mr Presumption.
What colours does it come in?
Any colour you like. Your choice. It can change colours as well. It can blend in or stand out whatever you want sir! You join the sales team and it's all yours!
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

OldGit

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #8 on: January 13, 2017, 02:32:40 AM »
Good one, Tank!

Bad Penny II

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #9 on: January 14, 2017, 01:05:30 AM »
At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.

Not so hasty Mr Presumption.
What colours does it come in?
Any colour you like. Your choice. It can change colours as well. It can blend in or stand out whatever you want sir! You join the sales team and it's all yours!

Oh no, no, no this is not acceptable.
The Henry "may his tyres always be pumped" would not approve!
All cars shall be black, this colour to suit a whim is blasphemous!
Oh, oh, my, and who really cares

Tank

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #10 on: January 14, 2017, 02:31:24 AM »
At what point would you tell the salesman to take a hike? Yes, pretty early I would think.

Not so hasty Mr Presumption.
What colours does it come in?
Any colour you like. Your choice. It can change colours as well. It can blend in or stand out whatever you want sir! You join the sales team and it's all yours!

Oh no, no, no this is not acceptable.
The Henry "may his tyres always be pumped" would not approve!
All cars shall be black, this colour to suit a whim is blasphemous!

Which shade of black would you like?
Gloss, silk or matt?
Including sparkles?
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Bad Penny II

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #11 on: January 14, 2017, 06:20:21 AM »
Black is black and sparkles are anathema.
Oh, oh, my, and who really cares

Tank

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #12 on: January 14, 2017, 09:47:48 AM »
Black is black and sparkles are anathema.
Right so dark black and matt.
Chrome trim?
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Gloucester

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #13 on: January 14, 2017, 11:53:57 AM »
Black is black and sparkles are anathema.
Right so dark black and matt.
Chrome trim?
Can you do  black chrome?
Tomorrow is precious, don't ruin it by fouling up today.

No one

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Re: Would you buy this car?
« Reply #14 on: January 14, 2017, 12:25:31 PM »
Tank:
Any colour you like.