John ate locusts and wild honey, and wore camel skins. First, if the bones are real, you should find some locust droppings, bee droppings, and camel hair/droppings somewhere, I think. Second, can you imagine what a horrible Valentine's Day date John would have been?
John: What's this place?
Date: This is a restaurant, John.
John: What do you do here - I hate cities.
Date: You eat here, John. What would you like for an appetizer?
John: Locusts. Raw locusts.
Date: Eewww! Don't you even want them dipped in chocolate?
John: What's chocolate? They're pretty good in honey.
Waiter: Sir, I'm sorry, we require a coat and tie in this restaurant.
John: Well, you have a coat and tie on - that should satisfy you.
Waiter: No, sir, you do not meet our dress code. In fact, I'm not sure you are even dressed at all.
John: Woe to you, you serpent, you hypocrite! The axe is laid to the root of the tree! You shall be smitten with the rod!
Date: Oh, no, not the rod again!
Security: Sir, you will have to leave now.
John: And you, you whited wall, you son of Satan, you will burn in the fires of hell!
Security: Sir, that's a terroristic threat. (Takes out a steak knife and cuts John's head off).
Waiter: Thanks. I was going to have a hard time finding any locusts.
Date: Well, he wouldn't have left a tip, anyway.