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Top 10 for Christians

Started by Whitney, July 07, 2006, 10:59:36 AM

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Whitney

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.

Yahoo Answers

Edited to give proper credit...the person from yahoo plagiarized:  http://www.evilbible.com/Top_Ten_List.htm

Court

#1
I'm sensing a lot of hostility. Do you feel that God has wronged you?

How bizarre, I just wrote something about this on WWGHA...
Why is it that all christians think you have to feel "wronged" by god to become atheist? I never felt wronged by god or angry at him because of all the bad shit that happened to me. I deconverted because of logic and reason, nothing else.
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

Big Mac

#2
"An atheist is a Christian (Jew, Muslim) with one less God."

What the hell does that mean?!? Man xians spell like shit. Sadly, a lot of them are in college.....scary, no?

Anyway this one girl says this:
"5-You don't know me or how I SPEND MY TIME! It's defintely not looking for negativity."

But in the next sentence she says this:

"4-Freewill!? Try it! ooh! That's right. You have already chosen ur destiny which is Hell because you chose not to believe. Wow! moving on!"

I can't wait for the day these people go back killing each other so we can just get on progressing mankind, you know giving equal rights between races, genders, etc. and advancing science and other academics. Hell, even making fun of religions on TV:

"3-Science and etc... hasn't convinced me because they have no proof or evidence to back up their claim. OOPS! Try again!
Speaking in tongues is evidence of Holy Spirit is in a born again believer and there are other evidence besides that such as miracles"

She just proved the point of the poster. Yeah, Science doesn't have evidence considering one must RESEARCH and present their findings to their peers for review. I love christians, such hilarious claims.

"2- Prayer does work. Close-minded people prayers will not be answered especially if their motives are not right. My prayers are 100% answered because of my relationship with God. God never fails. Nothing is impossible to God."

Okay, I want God to strike me down if he exists. I've done this tons of times and nothing happens, not even a chest pain (well I farted once really loud). People tell me not to test God but wouldn't him striking me down where I stand be more proof for his children? And it's not like he hasn't killed innocent people before, in worse ways than a quick, clean kill.

"1-The pharasees and scribes thought like you,atheist and agnostics and still go there way to hell. They did believe in God! Lastly,You don't know me or what I know. I don't just call myself a christian but a child of God which is more than you can say about ur self. I do know more than you and ur rival sect and that is: You need to get a LIFE! "

Holier than thou? Whatever, this lady is an idiot. How arrogant do you have to be to tell someone you are going to burn in hell. I always find demonization of the Pharisees hilarious, how do Christians know they are wrong and that the Pharisees never crucified Jesus? Hell even if they did, Jesus made some pretty kookie claims, you know being the Son of God and such. It's not unlike Christians burning herectics back in the day.
Quote from: "PoopShoot"And what if pigs shit candy?

TwistOfCain

#3
The things they say on these questions are always so funny.
Not about to see your light
But if you wanna find Hell with me
I can show you what it's like.
-Danzig, Mother

"I AM THOTH! AND I WILL NOT BE HUMBLED -- BY MAN OR GOD!"
-Thoth-Amon, The Book of Thoth

Asmodean Prime

#4
It's essential that you believe in Jesus

Only He can save you

why do you not consider that as important in your life?

each of us could be only one breath away from eternity.

does that not concern you?

it should.

Asmodean Prime

#5
ugh

Whitney

#6
Quote from: "Chris"ugh

indeed.

onlyme, we are all very familiar with christian beliefs and the claimed penalties for not following them.  Preaching actually belongs in the forum below this but you are new and the rules probably aren't clear enough so this is just to let you know.  If you have a rational argument for why we should all repent our atheist ways to follow christianity.  By all means post it and we'll discuss why we think you are wrong.

Court

#7
Exactly my feelings, Chris. Onlyme, I can see you're afraid of death, and that pretty much scared the shit out of me when I deconverted. But it has made me live my life completely different. I am much more spontaneous; I have realized that the only thing I'm gauranteed is RIGHT now, so I need to take advantage of it. Eternity is an unpleasant idea anyway, if you really and truly think about it.
[size=92]
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
Scuttling across the floors of silent seas
[/size]
[size=92]
try having a little faith = stop using your brain for a while -- ziffel[/size]

Asmodean Prime

#8
yes, court, you are very perceptive to detect i am afraid of death.  i cant understand it, but yes, i am.  the thing is, we dont know how many days we have left.  God makes sense to me.  and why risk it anyway (rejecting Him i mean), when there is so much at stake.  if you try to live as a Christian and it turned out you were wrong, you havent really lost anything, compared to living as an atheist and then finding you were wrong.

there's too much at stake.  life is important, and its important to try and get it right, we only have one chance of this, so make sure its the right choice.

Whitney

#9
Quote from: "onlyme"yes, court, you are very perceptive to detect i am afraid of death.  i cant understand it, but yes, i am.  the thing is, we dont know how many days we have left.  God makes sense to me.  and why risk it anyway (rejecting Him i mean), when there is so much at stake.  if you try to live as a Christian and it turned out you were wrong, you havent really lost anything, compared to living as an atheist and then finding you were wrong.

there's too much at stake.  life is important, and its important to try and get it right, we only have one chance of this, so make sure its the right choice.

When you say live your life as a christian vs that of an atheist....are you speaking of actions, of beliefs, or both?

Also, and just something to think about, what if Allah is the real God?  Even if God is real, what would heaven be like knowing so many people are suffering in hell?

Asmodean Prime

#10
i mean both in beliefs, and also i try in my actions, which i fail at a lot.

as far as hell, i wouldnt wish hell on ANYBODY, not even somebody like hitler or bin laden, i dont see how people can wish anyone in hell, really.   the main reason though is that God is love, and to be without Him for ever is too shocking to contemplate, either for myself or anyone else.  No Christian has the right to wish that for anybody else, i dont think.  but God says hell exists, and He makes the rules, we shouldnt presume that we can discount it, just because we dont like the idea.

McQ

#11
Fear of death is no reason to believe in a god. That's like being bullied, and the church has done it successfully for thousands of years. "If you don't believe, you're going to hell!" Give me a break!

I feared death more as a Christian than as a non-believer. Death is just part of being a living organism. Nothing fancy or magical there. We are sentient biological organisms, nothing more. I don't want to die tomorrow, but am not afraid of it one bit. It's much easier to accept life and death once you accept the fact that we, along with every other organism on Earth, just live and die, the same way we all have since the first amino acids got together and said, "Hey bud! Let's party!"
Elvis didn't do no drugs!
--Penn Jillette

Jassman

#12
Quote from: "onlyme"if you try to live as a Christian and it turned out you were wrong, you havent really lost anything, compared to living as an atheist and then finding you were wrong.

Well... you have to feel guilty about doing things and thinking thoughts that are as natural as eating or sleeping. Also, Christians often tend to see this life as sitting in a waiting room, waiting for their name to be called so that they can enjoy their next life. Through a lens like that, the world looks pointless and there seems to be no purpose in improving the human condition.

However, if this is the only life we will ever have then why not try to make it the greatest life possible for the greatest number of people?

Quote from: "onlyme"as far as hell, i wouldnt wish hell on ANYBODY
Quote from: "onlyme"God is love

Don't you think "God is love" and the existence of hell seem to contradict each other?
[size=75]"You ever notice how people who believe in creationism look really unevolved?" -Bill Hicks[/size]

[size=75]I'm drowning in the fear of gods. The more I see the less I want. I was not raised

TwistOfCain

#13
Actually, if you live as a Christian and end up wrong, you COULD lose a lot. For all you know, Islam is right, or Hinduism, or one of those crazy religions practiced by cavemen who worshipped a mammoth skull. How'd you like to end up in THAT version of Hell?
Not about to see your light
But if you wanna find Hell with me
I can show you what it's like.
-Danzig, Mother

"I AM THOTH! AND I WILL NOT BE HUMBLED -- BY MAN OR GOD!"
-Thoth-Amon, The Book of Thoth

Whitney

#14
Another top 10 for christians:

10 reasons why gay marraige should be illegal.?

1 Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2 Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3 Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4 Straight marriage has been around long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5 Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6 Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry

7 Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8 Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

9 Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly
forbid single parents to raise children.

10 Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Yahoo Answers