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Getting To Know You => Laid Back Lounge => Topic started by: Tank on December 19, 2015, 11:49:35 AM

Title: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on December 19, 2015, 11:49:35 AM
Non-puns will be deleted  >:(

(https://imagizer.imageshack.com/img924/4916/ofJZh0.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 19, 2015, 07:24:24 PM
A couple is walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve. They feel a slight precipitation.
"I think it's raining," says the man.
"No, it's snowing," replies the woman.
"How about we ask this Communist officer here? He is always right!" exclaims the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?"
"Definitely raining," Officer Rudolph replies before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile. "See? Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bluenose on December 19, 2015, 07:49:40 PM
Three sailors walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would've seen it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 19, 2015, 08:13:37 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimgur.com%2FDagHwJL.jpg&hash=50fb8cb78902263225ebf7ed2a4b2287e74d97bb)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on December 19, 2015, 08:15:17 PM
Do you need an Ark?
I Noah guy!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 19, 2015, 08:20:08 PM
My drug dealer really cracks me up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 19, 2015, 08:21:02 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash2/v/t1.0-9/10275928_667220359992421_3484553821518112965_n.jpg?oh=0569dc391b230b8744db5155fc92a4ed&oe=57226A79)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 19, 2015, 08:22:49 PM
Shout out to the ones who don't know the opposite of 'in'!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 19, 2015, 08:43:26 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimgur.com%2FD3mGgz6.jpg&hash=937080bb5da09958681a4ce6fdbf651d9afbb77a)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on December 19, 2015, 09:07:30 PM
(https://qph.is.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-0f4d13d61b70ab8b0aee05f7b767e901?convert_to_webp=true)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 19, 2015, 10:58:42 PM
One for Megan:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic3.fjcdn.com%2Fcomments%2FBad%2Bpuns%2Bi%2Blove%2B_2cc64927bb7ccc157382d5bf8c1e825a.jpg&hash=41976bffa7d4ea62a5884a7a7cc5b3195be0de95)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 20, 2015, 03:56:14 AM
 My sister bet that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should've seen her face when I drove pasta..
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on December 20, 2015, 07:23:09 AM
(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/custom_covers/216x146/403072304088851336_1419155047.jpg)

:rimshot:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 20, 2015, 05:02:18 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpt1/v/t1.0-9/12208528_1068480006505727_7460223152872462666_n.png?oh=e4bf179661d9fc4d52377287f3fb795d&oe=571DA390)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on December 20, 2015, 09:27:14 PM
My fear of roses is a thorny issue. I'm not sure what it stems from, but it seems likely I'll be stuck with it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 20, 2015, 11:33:26 PM
Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant.

Dirty Bastards.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on December 21, 2015, 05:10:27 PM
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on December 21, 2015, 07:55:11 PM
I once entered ten puns in a contest hoping one would win.
But... No pun in ten did.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 21, 2015, 10:03:50 PM
How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony?
It's not hard.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on December 22, 2015, 10:35:29 AM
Maybe only the Brits will get the significance of this one....

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CW0rlbNXIAAiGZo.jpg:large)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 22, 2015, 12:51:56 PM
^^^ Love it!

[youtube width=500]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cz2-ukrd2VQ[/youtube]
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on December 22, 2015, 02:22:33 PM
(https://scontent.fman1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtp1/v/t1.0-9/12376002_10156384068645451_29139278085302866_n.jpg?oh=806cc66dfe4a1263f7824ecd77fdae42&oe=56DA8705)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 22, 2015, 09:41:42 PM
I had a joke about murder that would've really killed but I'm sure you're all sick to death of those
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on December 22, 2015, 11:03:06 PM
... a friend of mine in a Pun competition (7th year running)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on December 23, 2015, 02:25:44 AM
A local store had a very Praguematic approach to business - checks (cheques) were not accepted but Czechs were.

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on December 25, 2015, 04:47:43 AM
My neighbor has seen his share of all he should see.  Been to war and back.  Everything from mustard gas to pepper spray. He is what one might call a well seasoned veteran.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 25, 2015, 12:26:15 PM
I think Santa has riverfront property in Brazil. All our presents came from Amazon this year.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 27, 2015, 07:31:54 AM
So what if I don't know what apocalypse means!? It's not the end of the world!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 27, 2015, 09:03:26 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/10262210_974034066005250_5417570074625733158_n.jpg?oh=0f05f8425e0b185a57d174cd44f130ab&oe=5711913A)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 27, 2015, 11:16:53 AM
Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?
She ran away from the ball.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on December 29, 2015, 03:29:23 PM
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta way.
We cannoli do so much.
His legacy will become a pizza history.
Here today, gone tomato.
Sadly, he ran out of thyme.
I'm sending olive my prayers to his family.
His wife is really devastated though, cheese still not over it.
You never saw sausage tragic thing.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 29, 2015, 03:50:09 PM
This year the National Association of Psychologists held their annual conference at a local ski resort.

I have never seen so many Freudians slip.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 29, 2015, 04:55:01 PM
Quote from: Tank on December 29, 2015, 03:50:09 PM
This year the National Association of Psychologists held their annual conference at a local ski resort.

I have never seen so many Freudians slip.
Think I've heard that one before....  :???:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 29, 2015, 05:01:09 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on December 29, 2015, 04:55:01 PM
Quote from: Tank on December 29, 2015, 03:50:09 PM
This year the National Association of Psychologists held their annual conference at a local ski resort.

I have never seen so many Freudians slip.
Think I've heard that one before....  :???:
No, no, no. You must be drunk!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on December 29, 2015, 05:50:35 PM
Quote from: Tank on December 29, 2015, 05:01:09 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on December 29, 2015, 04:55:01 PM
Quote from: Tank on December 29, 2015, 03:50:09 PM
This year the National Association of Psychologists held their annual conference at a local ski resort.

I have never seen so many Freudians slip.
Think I've heard that one before....  :???:
No, no, no. You must be drunk!
Too early on a Tuesday for that.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 30, 2015, 05:45:11 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/12391030_1007453885986420_6321685860454865353_n.jpg?oh=d2b6644c2e83630659740d2f36d559a8&oe=5702665A)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on December 30, 2015, 11:08:41 PM
That made me laugh out loud.  :rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 31, 2015, 09:15:04 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfa1/v/t1.0-9/1916789_10153361404071243_7514044633214538606_n.jpg?oh=fc1d72929cb0143cbe44a1363c537f46&oe=570410AA)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 31, 2015, 07:44:54 PM
I wish people would stop asking me where I think I'm going to be in 5 years. I don't have 2020 vision.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on December 31, 2015, 11:11:12 PM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on December 31, 2015, 07:44:54 PM
I wish people would stop asking me where I think I'm going to be in 5 years. I don't have 2020 vision.
And that's the last day you can post that!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on December 31, 2015, 11:19:49 PM
Quote from: Tank on December 31, 2015, 11:11:12 PM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on December 31, 2015, 07:44:54 PM
I wish people would stop asking me where I think I'm going to be in 5 years. I don't have 2020 vision.
And that's the last day you can post that!

Had to get it in while I still can.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 01, 2016, 12:45:11 AM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on December 31, 2015, 07:44:54 PM
I wish people would stop asking me where I think I'm going to be in 5 years. I don't have 2020 vision.
:rofl:





I wanna make a joke about sodium, but Na..


Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 01, 2016, 07:07:52 PM
I remember 2015 like it was yesterday.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 01, 2016, 07:30:09 PM
I just went to the coffee shop, while I was there the song "Bolero" came on over the speakers...about 8 minutes later just as I was about to leave everything started to un-Ravel.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 02, 2016, 12:11:35 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/10553639_942778962426693_5095271494884044237_n.jpg?oh=b04ee499d8dc6ed89bbd8c1bb67caa4b&oe=57470613)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 02, 2016, 02:36:31 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xta1/v/t1.0-9/5767_1220984161263352_8349514679682252188_n.jpg?oh=9c3ac52438ef2fa6266716826a0265d7&oe=57062249)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 02, 2016, 03:01:16 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtf1/v/t1.0-9/943871_811768695599101_7778108861209334049_n.jpg?oh=50b7b690284ed28a6aa75978ac6bd309&oe=57182B94)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 02, 2016, 10:09:49 PM
Leather armor is the best for sneaking because it's literally made of hide.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 02, 2016, 11:10:40 PM
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married.

Their wedding ceremony was nothing to write home about, but the reception was excellent!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 03, 2016, 12:11:40 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10341429_555326831282886_2457534514507908809_n.jpg?oh=f36c214eca27749329cb873e31003bd5&oe=57493922)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on January 03, 2016, 12:32:35 PM
I don't give edam what anyone says,  that's a gouda one.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 03, 2016, 06:37:10 PM
 I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 03, 2016, 08:29:33 PM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xlf1/v/t1.0-9/10406657_1446369442059171_546159765773078427_n.jpg?oh=ab1cfcb9b893f63abda9900a2bd7cb9f&oe=5706C3C5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 05, 2016, 04:22:26 PM
I decided to join the knitting club. They seem like such a close-knit group.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 06, 2016, 06:54:37 AM
Well he was obviously a stiff.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 06, 2016, 11:27:49 AM
If you get sick at the airport it could be a terminal illness.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on January 06, 2016, 11:53:57 AM
I listened to Justin Bieber,  now I have hearing aids.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 06, 2016, 02:10:54 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xaf1/v/t1.0-9/248352_893784400703744_6043952008312626567_n.jpg?oh=1a7ea5b027620f2ec15ae6ff3f074da5&oe=5706004E)

If you don't get watch this.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 06, 2016, 02:11:12 PM
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 06, 2016, 07:24:14 PM
I got an e-mail saying 'At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!'
I thought, "That's just spam."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on January 07, 2016, 12:49:06 AM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmeganmcgrane.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F10%2Fimpasta.jpg&hash=f4345a8f99fd118528ba666a6efeb36f010d232f)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 07, 2016, 08:16:59 AM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fvignette2.wikia.nocookie.net%2Fjawsunleashed2%2Fimages%2Fb%2Fbc%2FSperm-Whale-1.jpg%2Frevision%2Flatest%3Fcb%3D20130527200555&hash=ee9e58c2d800e8a9156b299e3974675f70672945)

See? You see?! The Asmo is in on it too!  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
It is getting tense.
Break it up and drop it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 07, 2016, 02:00:52 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
It is getting tense.
Break it up and drop it.

Oops, I'm sorry...nothing to say here.

(Premature Posting, so embarrassing)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 07, 2016, 02:07:35 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
It is getting tense.
Break it up and drop it.
I can't stop, and it's lasted longer than four hours.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 02:14:54 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 02:07:35 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
It is getting tense.
Break it up and drop it.

Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 02:00:52 PM

Oops, I'm sorry...nothing to say here.

(Premature Posting, so embarrassing)

I can't stop, and it's lasted longer than four hours.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Put a lid on it.
Just let it rest--in peace.

Funerals will never be the same for me from now on.  :shifty:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 07, 2016, 02:40:31 PM
Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex? Because they have cotton balls.

Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 02:14:54 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 02:07:35 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 01:49:06 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 07, 2016, 01:30:40 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 01:02:31 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 06:39:25 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 05:35:56 AM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 07, 2016, 03:52:18 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 06, 2016, 12:59:44 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

Mags I really don't think "Cutting It Out" is the best resolution for this problem, surely they could just strap it down, anyway I'm not cutting anything.

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Knock it off!

Magdalena ,so you want I should pull out?

Bruno de la Pole!
Really! >:(
Zip it, just zip it!

Magdalena , not sure how long I can keep this up.
You should check with your doctor to see if the blue pill is right for you.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
It is getting tense.
Break it up and drop it.

Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 07, 2016, 02:00:52 PM

Oops, I'm sorry...nothing to say here.

(Premature Posting, so embarrassing)

I can't stop, and it's lasted longer than four hours.

Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Put a lid on it.
Just let it rest--in peace.

Funerals will never be the same for me from now on.  :shifty:

Ok Magdalena

Davin I think something like this would work, we just need to reposition.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FOre1yUh.jpg&hash=f8bd3b5456cdd7577ef7b52d16fa6cfc3410cd1c)






Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 07, 2016, 10:21:41 PM
 I saw a girl today who had 12 nipples. Sounds crazy, dozen tit?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 08, 2016, 12:59:24 PM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10400975_10153249520936700_7760142734864630879_n.jpg?oh=8f94b94671d9072834968ae006f5e423&oe=570AC297)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 08, 2016, 01:33:33 PM
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 08, 2016, 02:14:20 PM
The Asmo blames the cartoonist. Shouldnae have drawn the muslim prophet with a bomb in his turban.  >:(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on January 09, 2016, 02:34:33 AM
What is it called when you are so constipated that you can't even pass gas?

Congestive Fart Failure.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 09, 2016, 04:25:34 PM
Sticking with the funeral theme.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F7bxZccJ.jpg&hash=5aa7c10596c8eb189a3ad21e4912b478be0cb35e)
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Ft68O8Zq.jpg&hash=75512b73b7e3ccbb9d72029ea83d0301fc2a7430)
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F29NScK2.jpg&hash=e3c2960618c450c19067d2e5a55553567ac743f8) :-X
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 09, 2016, 10:32:37 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpt1/v/t1.0-9/12540768_10153894049986663_2929000754452595731_n.jpg?oh=39753c43a540d4223991ab757bbda34e&oe=570A431F)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 09, 2016, 10:37:49 PM
Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 10, 2016, 01:31:53 AM
a roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "five beers please"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 10, 2016, 03:10:20 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 10, 2016, 01:31:53 AM
a roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "five beers please"
Ha-ha! I get it.  :snicker:
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F-vTMeOYBv828%2FVI5fmI-o3qI%2FAAAAAAAAN_E%2FHo5vRU7jxoQ%2Fs1600%2F06.jpg&hash=46f17a572d1597f621ff712ff0a46abd5c77e0ec)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 10, 2016, 03:23:16 AM
A good Latin student never declines sex.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 10, 2016, 04:42:41 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 10, 2016, 03:23:16 AM
A good Latin student never declines sex.
I suppose that makes me a good latin student.  ;)
Funny, I barely speak any latin....
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 10, 2016, 03:39:37 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTJVcTi3.jpg&hash=c956a2992a8a10dde9bb3531e12bc3f9e7364461)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 10, 2016, 08:00:46 PM
Who is this?

(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/12541087_1053711488005167_8311154147437977805_n.jpg?oh=74b6fbf1bca816d76f3872484434c47f&oe=5706D5F2)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 10, 2016, 08:51:14 PM
A creatively decorated asthma inhaler?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 10, 2016, 09:09:46 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 10, 2016, 08:51:14 PM
A creatively decorated asthma inhaler?
Nope.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 10, 2016, 09:27:45 PM
Vlad the Inhaler
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 10, 2016, 09:28:13 PM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on January 10, 2016, 09:27:45 PM
Vlad the Inhaler
Correct!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 08:28:49 AM
How was that different from what The Asmo said!? (https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpics.picturetrail.com%2Fres%2Falbum%2Fbling%2Fsmileys%2Ficon_twisted.gif&hash=d741cea342f2b96b8915260a0a62742e5681b875)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 11, 2016, 08:32:18 AM
Four fonts walk into a bar. The barman says "Hey get out! We don't want your type in here!"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 11, 2016, 12:41:56 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 08:28:49 AM
How was that different from what The Asmo said!? (https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpics.picturetrail.com%2Fres%2Falbum%2Fbling%2Fsmileys%2Ficon_twisted.gif&hash=d741cea342f2b96b8915260a0a62742e5681b875)
We're on the pun thread where accuracy is different from elsewhere.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 11, 2016, 04:35:26 PM
Quote from: Tank on January 11, 2016, 12:41:56 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 08:28:49 AM
How was that different from what The Asmo said!? (https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpics.picturetrail.com%2Fres%2Falbum%2Fbling%2Fsmileys%2Ficon_twisted.gif&hash=d741cea342f2b96b8915260a0a62742e5681b875)
We're on the pun thread where accuracy is different from elsewhere.

Besides, while you were gone I took over your position as forum deity.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 05:20:58 PM
Hm! No Divine Eyebrows.  >:(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 12, 2016, 12:41:17 PM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xat1/v/t1.0-9/12494953_1973386976220180_6634320046704110130_n.jpg?oh=7fb1d24567b92a967c4ae1e576213390&oe=570827BF)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 13, 2016, 04:09:26 AM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on January 11, 2016, 04:35:26 PM
Quote from: Tank on January 11, 2016, 12:41:56 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 08:28:49 AM
How was that different from what The Asmo said!? (https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpics.picturetrail.com%2Fres%2Falbum%2Fbling%2Fsmileys%2Ficon_twisted.gif&hash=d741cea342f2b96b8915260a0a62742e5681b875)
We're on the pun thread where accuracy is different from elsewhere.

Besides, while you were gone I took over your position as forum deity.
Quote from: Asmodean on January 11, 2016, 05:20:58 PM
Hm! No Divine Eyebrows.  >:(

Multiple deities?
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages6.fanpop.com%2Fimage%2Fphotos%2F34600000%2FCalvin-Candie-django-unchained-34661616-160-160.gif&hash=4f88339163ae5b9841c77204dc5f97e9019bd522)
I like that.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 13, 2016, 07:05:09 AM
Yes, well... He shalt SMITE the blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, THEN we'll see.  >:(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 13, 2016, 06:38:24 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 13, 2016, 07:05:09 AM
Yes, well... He shalt SMITE the blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, THEN we'll see.  >:(
Yes, THEN we'll see, but right now, we have two: The Grayly-Divine Grumpy Lumpy one, and The Blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, (AKA Goddess of chaos.) I do want coffee and doughnuts, but I also want--what is it that The Asmo provides? I forgot.  :headscratch:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 13, 2016, 06:41:44 PM
Pebbles. Asmo provides pebbles.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 13, 2016, 06:51:53 PM
That not very inviting anymore, is it?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 13, 2016, 06:54:27 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on January 13, 2016, 06:38:24 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on January 13, 2016, 07:05:09 AM
Yes, well... He shalt SMITE the blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, THEN we'll see.  >:(
Yes, THEN we'll see, but right now, we have two: The Grayly-Divine Grumpy Lumpy one, and The Blasphemously-Divine-Eyebrowless one, (AKA Goddess of chaos.) I do want coffee and doughnuts, but I also want--what is it that The Asmo provides? I forgot.  :headscratch:

I'll have you know my eyebrows are a thing of beauty.  >:(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 13, 2016, 07:54:37 PM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on January 13, 2016, 06:54:27 PM

I'll have you know my eyebrows are a thing of beauty.  >:(

Having had them incredoulusly raised in my general direction I have to agree with the godess on this one.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 13, 2016, 08:04:40 PM
More latin puns:

Locative Party: It's Where it's At
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 14, 2016, 01:11:56 AM
I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory, all I did was take a day off.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on January 14, 2016, 09:22:53 AM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on January 14, 2016, 01:11:56 AM
I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory, all I did was take a day off.
Yes, well... Thou who usurpest and whatnot.  >:(

Actually, we do compensate for the Earth's rotation not being quite in sync with the calendar, do we not? Damn, I'm getting old. :-(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 14, 2016, 08:20:44 PM
 The first time I used an elevator it was really uplifting, then it let me down.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 14, 2016, 09:18:40 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FghgWF4z.gif&hash=332763534165115a4e5f48f1d9c7d40bdc3790db)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 15, 2016, 11:34:02 PM
Stealing someone's coffee is called a mugging.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 16, 2016, 02:34:43 AM
My niece had a new teacher today, said she cat understand her.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJJ5ncMC.jpg&hash=6484cc0e409dba8e2513ad75d00f79b2c5361777)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 18, 2016, 02:37:36 PM
She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.



That one may be the most painful.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 18, 2016, 07:34:23 PM
There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided.
At last report, the survivors were marooned.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 18, 2016, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 18, 2016, 02:37:36 PM
She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


That one may be the most painful.

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 19, 2016, 02:47:34 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 18, 2016, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 18, 2016, 02:37:36 PM
She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


That one may be the most painful.

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.
She gives out litter grades.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 19, 2016, 03:06:47 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 19, 2016, 02:47:34 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 18, 2016, 07:40:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on January 18, 2016, 02:37:36 PM
She needs to really pay attention to the feliner points.


That one may be the most painful.

She did report a purr-fect attendance for the class.
She gives out litter grades.

Paw-lease, I heard she flunked everybody.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Buddy on January 19, 2016, 03:13:41 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.petweek.org%2Fassets%2Fimages%2Fclassroom-dog2.jpg&hash=fbbe4b617f7086a8c4c26bc49c5990dafa04b486)

I heard the substitute is a real bitch.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 19, 2016, 06:01:13 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/12548873_1045548822154523_3353128926324996022_n.jpg?oh=717b9619dddc384515bccd4721f849c3&oe=57058E35)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 19, 2016, 07:49:07 PM
Quote from: Budhorse4 on January 19, 2016, 03:13:41 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.petweek.org%2Fassets%2Fimages%2Fclassroom-dog2.jpg&hash=fbbe4b617f7086a8c4c26bc49c5990dafa04b486)

I heard the substitute is a real bitch.

I don't know about that, she subbed for my Home Economics class, and her woofles were pawsome.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Siz on January 21, 2016, 01:41:25 AM
I entered a local newspaper's pun contest. I sent in ten different puns in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. No pun in ten did.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 21, 2016, 01:14:45 PM
I had trouble in one particular class in college because the professor had called on me to solve an exponential equation and I told her I couldn't because as an atheist I don't believe in higher powers.

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 21, 2016, 02:50:23 PM
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 21, 2016, 04:16:37 PM
Question: If a Catholic Astronaut is weightless aboard the International Space Station, do they have mass?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on January 21, 2016, 05:40:13 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.joesdump.com%2Fimages%2FMusicShark_ScourgeOfTheHighCs.jpg&hash=c748714ef06e59d99c49785c36258da892a377be)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 22, 2016, 02:05:20 PM
As atheists and non-believers it's important for us to avoid joining dangerous cults, so please: Practice Safe Sects!

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 22, 2016, 06:24:25 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xft1/v/t1.0-9/12507429_10153830159661730_892069400342947353_n.jpg?oh=70a1bcfb30437f0c8c6055d2df4f9f6b&oe=56FEF209)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 22, 2016, 06:53:16 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic.fjcdn.com%2Fpictures%2FFish_9142ac_781814.jpg&hash=f9b39cc69b0a55dfca397351eb889761cc7062c3)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 23, 2016, 04:06:03 AM
Not sure if I've ever mentioned this here on the forum before, but when I was young and attending catholic school I briefly entertained the idea of becoming a monk, but found out I was cloisterphobic.

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 23, 2016, 10:29:50 AM
I went into a shop and I said, "Can someone sell me a kettle." The bloke said "Kenwood" I said, "okay, where is he?"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 23, 2016, 10:31:35 AM
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 23, 2016, 10:33:25 AM
So I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, that's aboriginal...
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 23, 2016, 11:41:21 AM
A termite walks into a bar and says "Is the bar tender here?"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 23, 2016, 11:57:00 AM
The Duracell bunny has been arrested. He's charged with battery.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 23, 2016, 02:21:48 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xlp1/v/t1.0-9/12510432_10153832368536730_4426315277008379554_n.jpg?oh=57250776421fb0a7d00695f7a893dd89&oe=572EB2B7)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on January 23, 2016, 02:32:01 PM
Quote from: Tank on January 23, 2016, 10:33:25 AM
So I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, that's aboriginal...

took me a bit - good one (can look at it 3 ways)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 26, 2016, 05:58:06 PM
I'm sorry to hear your uncle was run over by a boat in Venice.
My gondolences.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 28, 2016, 01:27:06 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xal1/v/t1.0-9/317010_566496903377635_316995039_n.jpg?oh=7f370500257505a7ead15ac12239d5f1&oe=573373DD)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on January 28, 2016, 02:08:41 PM
Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 28, 2016, 06:07:16 PM
Thanks to fossils, archaeologists have been able to determine that there once a genetic mutation millions of year ago, causing the creation of a five-legged dinosaur.

As far as we know, this is the first evidence we have ever seen of a reptile dysfunction.
:jaded rimshot:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on January 29, 2016, 06:02:09 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F2WNE08e.jpg&hash=57ae2d438da13ea7b30130acbf0013db9fa26e06)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on January 29, 2016, 06:06:08 PM
Rancher Ralph raised Angora goats, but disease dwindled his herd to two pitiful billies. From that point forward, whenever there was an issue Rancher Ralph was considered to be the goat two guy.   
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 03, 2016, 12:58:42 PM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xaf1/t31.0-8/12640388_10102471159374012_7587195704931670667_o.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 03, 2016, 08:33:27 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpt1/v/t1.0-9/12289504_501681763326995_564359053268500851_n.jpg?oh=88f043169109af7570ddb959232bcdd4&oe=57407F23)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 05, 2016, 06:46:43 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xla1/v/t1.0-9/1484716_10153136669837792_3682235254931760428_n.jpg?oh=046452655ee2b2d7d9589b802907e26d&oe=576B92D6)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 05, 2016, 02:10:18 PM
Knock Knock!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on February 05, 2016, 03:27:12 PM
Quote from: Tank on February 05, 2016, 06:46:43 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xla1/v/t1.0-9/1484716_10153136669837792_3682235254931760428_n.jpg?oh=046452655ee2b2d7d9589b802907e26d&oe=576B92D6)

I hope so!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on February 05, 2016, 03:29:33 PM
From one of my students:

I went to a zoo the other day, it only had one animal.  It was a Shih Tzu.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 05, 2016, 05:49:00 PM
Quote from: Claireliontamer on February 05, 2016, 03:27:12 PM
Quote from: Tank on February 05, 2016, 06:46:43 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xla1/v/t1.0-9/1484716_10153136669837792_3682235254931760428_n.jpg?oh=046452655ee2b2d7d9589b802907e26d&oe=576B92D6)

I hope so!

So I don't get this, and have to assume it's a UK thing? 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 05, 2016, 06:25:12 PM
Spring is just around the corner.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 05, 2016, 06:31:09 PM
Quote from: Tank on February 05, 2016, 06:25:12 PM
Spring is just around the corner.

So it's not a UK thing, it's a Bruno is "too dense" thing...anyway I was concentrating too much on the shadow it cast, thought it was a notebook or something?


Duh...
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on February 06, 2016, 02:12:13 PM
Same here.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 06, 2016, 03:50:21 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 05, 2016, 02:10:18 PM
Knock Knock!

Who's there?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on February 07, 2016, 06:13:28 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 06, 2016, 03:50:21 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 05, 2016, 02:10:18 PM
Knock Knock!

Who's there?

Ecurb.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on February 07, 2016, 10:01:00 AM
Why did the programmer quit his job?
Because he didn't get arrays.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 07, 2016, 04:47:30 PM
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on February 07, 2016, 06:13:28 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 06, 2016, 03:50:21 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 05, 2016, 02:10:18 PM
Knock Knock!

Who's there?

Ecurb.

Ecurb who?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on February 11, 2016, 01:50:25 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 07, 2016, 04:47:30 PM
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on February 07, 2016, 06:13:28 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 06, 2016, 03:50:21 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on February 05, 2016, 02:10:18 PM
Knock Knock!

Who's there?

Ecurb.

Ecurb who?

Ecurb Your Enthusiasm!




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FZ7vCQ7D.jpg&hash=ad68e6d2227731c2c14a9be425a3a0f08d5b5db6)

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 13, 2016, 11:03:38 AM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs1.favim.com%2Forig%2F141118%2Fbooks-divergent-funny-quotes-Favim.com-2246660.jpg&hash=917520bd3a762ac552e5093a3b95413784357b18)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 15, 2016, 08:29:01 AM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xlp1/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/10425030_1023989240950268_2449063173715610585_n.jpg?oh=15f4af6494257c512c4925b4b3f394e6&oe=5722D698)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 17, 2016, 08:19:01 AM
From one of our new members.

"Wiping out an entire insect species could be catastrophic for monkey people and give rise to vegetable based life-forms...

Planet of the grapes.

Zen"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 22, 2016, 07:11:57 PM
What do witches use in the summer???

Sun tan potion!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 25, 2016, 09:38:26 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/1546229_10152207593068982_565563462_n.jpg?oh=292f2a11b460080a898a7c946dcc894f&oe=575585B4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on February 25, 2016, 11:28:05 PM
I would so cook with that...  8)




It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 26, 2016, 08:22:38 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfl1/v/t1.0-9/12743580_984506984935756_5479346270096467877_n.jpg?oh=4084546f9fb994a41a2bff59502c3db4&oe=575BA711)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on February 27, 2016, 08:35:49 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/12745447_1115377495160478_9160300073951415998_n.jpg?oh=83d3a2d822de731f5e1b0fb70f060caa&oe=57512FA5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: dunamandros on February 28, 2016, 05:20:37 AM
Quote from: Tank on January 23, 2016, 11:57:00 AM
The Duracell bunny has been arrested. He's charged with battery.
It's a case of mistaken identity since the bunny is from Energizer. You'll see, the charge won't last long.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on March 01, 2016, 04:26:33 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xlp1/v/t1.0-9/12744631_1487903787905736_4011139649232387166_n.png?oh=88e14aa8acd120fd292bda348cf37372&oe=574B6DB1&__gda__=1466734244_dba70fb1f8ecda7ec61c965009d6dbb5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 01, 2016, 07:02:06 PM
When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on March 02, 2016, 02:05:56 PM
Coffee enemas wake your ass up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 06, 2016, 06:49:36 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpt1/v/t1.0-9/12790943_1094530407287667_3919507381989066489_n.jpg?oh=a56b136c60c0030257d1472cf188e093&oe=57589ABD)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 06, 2016, 04:16:02 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtf1/v/t1.0-9/s851x315/12806212_1286837037997420_3119425962982635674_n.jpg?oh=ba11f2d62f149df90bd651ed85a94c2e&oe=5761E28E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on March 06, 2016, 07:09:08 PM
In case you are thinking of becoming a new dog owner it is wise to remember that most dogs "Can't Handle their Licker".
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 06, 2016, 08:42:11 PM
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 14, 2016, 01:05:56 PM
(https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtf1/v/t1.0-9/580785_1185923211425456_1414493721092259354_n.jpg?oh=9c53e1101a0fb7b0696462dad13be960&oe=5751A4D8)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on March 14, 2016, 02:32:40 PM
Quote from: Tank on March 14, 2016, 01:05:56 PM
(https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtf1/v/t1.0-9/580785_1185923211425456_1414493721092259354_n.jpg?oh=9c53e1101a0fb7b0696462dad13be960&oe=5751A4D8)

You should be banned for that Tank.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on March 14, 2016, 05:32:45 PM
Bruno, today is
Monday, March 14
Pi Day 2016

(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/dd/70/8a/dd708ae9a02c37d4bbdbbe11c2ea06bd.jpg)

(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/69/bd/23/69bd23b653523afb404d4642ab33d167.jpg)

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mathfunny.com%2Fimages%2Fpi-piday-joke.jpg&hash=4ce705383cc3367247f0da7c4a576890b0d02ad2)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on March 14, 2016, 07:27:50 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on March 14, 2016, 05:32:45 PM
Bruno, today is
Monday, March 14
Pi Day 2016

(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/dd/70/8a/dd708ae9a02c37d4bbdbbe11c2ea06bd.jpg)

(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/69/bd/23/69bd23b653523afb404d4642ab33d167.jpg)

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mathfunny.com%2Fimages%2Fpi-piday-joke.jpg&hash=4ce705383cc3367247f0da7c4a576890b0d02ad2)

I'm aware of that Maggie  ;D, but that doesn't change the fact that Tanks "Chicken-Pot-Pi" wasn't worth getting banned for, your's are probably worse.

I ban both of you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on March 14, 2016, 07:55:19 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CdiFqmeXEAAfTTo.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on March 14, 2016, 08:33:11 PM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on March 14, 2016, 07:27:50 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on March 14, 2016, 05:32:45 PM
Bruno, today is
Monday, March 14
Pi Day 2016

....

I'm aware of that Maggie  ;D
...
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FihqzR1N.gif&hash=1c1cbd409a49688a4b8cc828edb223b7728dfcf0)

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on March 14, 2016, 08:33:50 PM
(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/5a/33/69/5a33696c05f8570d2e325a7761e830e0.jpg)
:snicker:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 14, 2016, 09:54:09 PM
Quote from: Claireliontamer on March 14, 2016, 07:55:19 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CdiFqmeXEAAfTTo.jpg)
:rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 15, 2016, 09:34:42 AM
(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-OTUweY_Z_Jo/UfRR5YRP43I/AAAAAAABTGw/FaSeUZMm4jA/w506-h678/photo.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 15, 2016, 08:00:08 PM
If you thought the Chicken Pi was bad....

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 16, 2016, 06:39:03 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtf1/v/t1.0-9/1909971_10208869027423925_8044238832873412867_n.jpg?oh=5d52a772d8ea7e0f71afc59e23232663&oe=5757A195)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 17, 2016, 06:21:54 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xlp1/v/t1.0-9/10614254_817511875020413_7481939607812559124_n.jpg?oh=11108d31f0f38cac7fc1a667af591901&oe=578E96F6)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on March 17, 2016, 07:57:56 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fc1.thejournal.ie%2Fmedia%2F2012%2F03%2FFLOCK-OF-SHEEP-IN-SCOTLAND-GO-GREEN-pic-11-752x501.jpg&hash=beb9831bcbb9f817cc88b2d95ddd87835182c9dd)

... apparently, the grass is always greener on the other's hide.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 17, 2016, 09:33:05 PM
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on March 18, 2016, 08:36:16 PM
Just seen a documentary about how they used to bolt together metal to make boats and bridges. It was riveting.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on March 18, 2016, 11:46:55 PM
My friend @punmanben is posting a pun a day... Here is today's:
Benjamin Ziek (@PunManBen) tweeted at 4:03 PM on Fri, Mar 18, 2016:
I laid down on a lounger, and I found out it was stuffed with down. That's when I knew I was on a wild goose chaise #punnedwagon @punmanben
(https://twitter.com/PunManBen/status/710964877699846144?s=03)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 19, 2016, 09:30:28 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/1486667_817923454979255_6480450866684125645_n.jpg?oh=a1f2ab1f5115bf38c7e0a5a09567fb4d&oe=57842F6E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 23, 2016, 04:40:27 AM
(https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2016-02/26/14/enhanced/webdr06/enhanced-14091-1456515592-2.jpg?no-auto)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 23, 2016, 11:45:12 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xtl1/v/t1.0-9/12813983_1517207614975353_6372886308944710985_n.png?oh=85a5b58ee67cdcc8f3f363b5c9f27cb4&oe=578A5B60&__gda__=1469626451_68b2ae194c83a50e3ce9cd2264adf5c7)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 27, 2016, 10:20:53 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xla1/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/10421333_822759631162304_5704146315253803060_n.jpg?oh=51086582dcdc1830cdfc46624bf8f9b1&oe=5779C225)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 29, 2016, 02:01:28 PM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfa1/v/t1.0-9/10407402_10205582481148944_6451875406936936120_n.jpg?oh=9bc44e335f66d6f2b2fc51a33017723b&oe=577EE92A)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on March 30, 2016, 03:43:24 AM
It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on April 01, 2016, 08:42:59 PM
Never marry a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on April 02, 2016, 03:14:27 PM
^^Love that one Claire...

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FptsrxwE.jpg&hash=1d077da7d7e28defb4ec9d91608c3c7d50ea837f)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on April 04, 2016, 02:15:53 PM
A couple more from my friend Ben:

I was counting my quartz and amethyst, and I got arrested. That's what I get for doing crystal math.

They said the new statue was made of marble, but I just took it for granite.

A cell said to his sister, "Part of me is breaking off." "What part?" He replied. "It's my toe, sis!"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on April 06, 2016, 04:31:42 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.ifcdn.com%2Fimages%2F6e1c3c67c58ee20b7b42a4ebb39cd936ab36ef183b18744b86ac8a9009ee59ed_1.jpg&hash=6e54b1190969ac37291d5045be784b7b300e08d7)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on April 17, 2016, 05:37:01 AM
I think Joe should have been banned for the one above^^ ;D



(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FO2Rb1r4.jpg&hash=c3a418f8f0e19211151f91806947ba4d05cf8a53)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 17, 2016, 08:01:23 AM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/l4siWbQmmTdijOS08/200.gif)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 17, 2016, 01:37:54 PM
^ Argh! :bleh:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 17, 2016, 05:17:34 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/12991022_1296223460389605_3342209431625898283_n.jpg?oh=e9de3b32bd05083f1ae302c29f075e6a&oe=57B8F6FD)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 18, 2016, 08:12:15 AM
(https://scontent-ams3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfl1/v/t1.0-9/13012679_829339250530440_2397171448484238836_n.jpg?oh=8c1bc1cacfa0415f07a88417b49c5efa&oe=577CD621)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bad Penny II on April 19, 2016, 03:18:37 PM
If you need someone to kill
I'm a man without a will
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: MariaEvri on April 19, 2016, 04:22:51 PM
Quote from: Tank on April 17, 2016, 08:01:23 AM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/l4siWbQmmTdijOS08/200.gif)

ok I find this extremely cute!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on April 20, 2016, 03:43:42 AM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic.fjcdn.com%2Flarge%2Fpictures%2F25%2Fe1%2F25e1b2_2005712.jpg&hash=93b7f5e66f4640b6a61034fd595c48aeeef32eda)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on April 23, 2016, 05:02:23 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FzPqz9bO.jpg&hash=8c050a05798503051641e4d3eac753c3bf9568d2)



(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FhU13jJb.jpg&hash=1b59d6185b4cd8e6cc76a4656bace7537663f385)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 28, 2016, 12:43:55 PM
(https://scontent-ams3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p296x100/13015242_10209053758484803_1536155528610934671_n.jpg?oh=b401acb020a5722937e1cf19ab3dca8b&oe=57AF876A)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 02, 2016, 02:27:58 PM
What's the difference between a Snowman, and a Snowomen?

"Snowballs"


There was a kidnapping yesterday near my house,...I woke him up.


I accidentally swallowed some food coloring yesterday, and I feel like I dyed a little bit inside.


I'm so fucking hungry right now I could eat a Henway.

What's a Henway Bruno?

About five pounds.


Did you all hear about the fire last night at the circus?

It was in tents!

In-tents!


What's a pirates favorite letter of the alphabet?

The sea, a pirates first love is always the sea!



A Network Engineer went to the Doctor, and he told the Doctor, "It hurts when IP"!

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 04, 2016, 06:51:11 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xtp1/v/t1.0-9/13100736_232313263797150_4962502532909249_n.jpg?oh=70aa14018df2dc06f29d97525d6b798f&oe=57A4478C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 06, 2016, 11:23:40 AM
(https://scontent-mia1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13124695_10153693197952734_7308154824387097751_n.jpg?oh=56ea760f2a948acc1aa72ca7353c4679&oe=57B59EFA)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on May 06, 2016, 11:41:24 PM
A nurse pulls a rectal thermometer out of her pocket and thinks,  some asshole has my pen.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on May 09, 2016, 08:34:37 PM
(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/7c/89/6b/7c896b775e4b374cc99f00176d597a10.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Siz on May 09, 2016, 08:54:06 PM
^
Apparently, she was heard shouting "Get off your sorry ass or I'll smack you with the neck of this guitar". He replied "Is that a fret?"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on May 09, 2016, 10:03:27 PM
^
She says it started with a string of offenses mostly because he was always tuning her out.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on May 09, 2016, 10:38:17 PM
(you guys are good... oh, yeah...)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 11, 2016, 06:48:39 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13164453_706397882835495_8816049803403477139_n.jpg?oh=4dca3c0f815e667f59c72d058a9cf71f&oe=579D4F29)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Crow on May 12, 2016, 08:11:02 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fc5Vqe5b.jpg&hash=31ede4657d19b84b708a689246f24363d5bd9bc1)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on May 12, 2016, 09:47:38 PM
^ OMG!!!  I can hear him say "Coral". 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 12, 2016, 10:21:46 PM


(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FnKYuioe.jpg&hash=868741b0d81cd89f15f48045cc2f011c9e700885)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on May 14, 2016, 03:22:59 AM
Re you impieing that the hay will go to heaven out a horses ass?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 14, 2016, 04:55:56 AM
Cheech Marin started teaching Spanish at a school in his hometown.

They called him the Cheecher.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 14, 2016, 05:09:38 AM
Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger confirmed they will be doing a movie about Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and John Sebastian Bach. When asked about who he would play, Schwarzenegger said, "I'll be Bach."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Pasta Chick on May 14, 2016, 05:33:33 AM
I went to this zoo, and in the whole place the only animal was one domestic dog. It was a Shih Tzu.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on May 14, 2016, 06:28:12 AM
Will the puns stop? Yo, I don't know.
(https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2013-10/enhanced/webdr02/30/11/enhanced-buzz-22880-1383145411-1.jpg?no-auto)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on May 15, 2016, 02:45:14 PM
Quote from: Icarus on May 14, 2016, 03:22:59 AM
Re you impieing that the hay will go to heaven out a horses ass?

I think it's Christian Bale, an English Actor.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_Bale
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 16, 2016, 01:15:19 PM
(https://scontent-cdg2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/s851x315/13226847_854686417969625_1228075239322581107_n.jpg?oh=eae02c1c74f69d608c8e6837668fd16c&oe=579EA0F6)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 07, 2016, 01:24:30 AM
(https://fbcdn-photos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xlp1/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/13412863_930627850383157_3057887703277310207_n.jpg?oh=2185b65b03ad0ac28b8ee8b01f1cbb8d&oe=57C9842E&__gda__=1476994064_dfa7f399f3a1c9a9e257b0269971126a)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on June 07, 2016, 06:11:44 PM
^^ lol! (ow) ^^
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 10, 2016, 08:13:26 AM
(https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/13055497_1002810003089598_4732374540854245803_n.png?oh=741da9e629b4af997ff10f397c204cda&oe=57C36057)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on June 11, 2016, 05:12:32 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FzYxFBiz.jpg&hash=9fd345ba42c7509bd1cd6aa8de86cf496e0a9ae5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 12, 2016, 09:56:33 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/10428418_10153065545714093_6395572735561648370_n.jpg?oh=81bc401bdb371907c570adc766e57115&oe=57C7EEC9)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 12, 2016, 01:24:18 PM
^ :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on June 12, 2016, 03:21:37 PM
Quote from: Tank on June 12, 2016, 09:56:33 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/10428418_10153065545714093_6395572735561648370_n.jpg?oh=81bc401bdb371907c570adc766e57115&oe=57C7EEC9)
Huh..?  :???:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bad Penny II on June 12, 2016, 03:46:34 PM
If someone can come up with a pun that links the before their timedness of the Velvet Underground which included John Cale with the current popularity of spinachy kale to my satisfaction, I'll pay them $1.50
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on June 12, 2016, 04:08:04 PM
Quote from: Asmodean on June 12, 2016, 03:21:37 PM
Quote from: Tank on June 12, 2016, 09:56:33 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/10428418_10153065545714093_6395572735561648370_n.jpg?oh=81bc401bdb371907c570adc766e57115&oe=57C7EEC9)
Huh..?  :???:

Juggler = Jugular
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 15, 2016, 12:04:42 AM
http://mentalfloss.com/article/69463/50-amazing-puns-past-pun-competitions (http://mentalfloss.com/article/69463/50-amazing-puns-past-pun-competitions)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 15, 2016, 12:44:43 PM
(https://scontent-amt2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p417x417/13427785_1169742233065321_2689334374791845782_n.jpg?oh=3f46383fd7929fa822443f3ae84d1ae0&oe=57CCA4C8)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 21, 2016, 10:45:54 PM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xla1/v/t1.0-9/13432299_1602787949750652_9086256790610632816_n.jpg?oh=4b3019649b1fa98a458b42b0c7198a05&oe=57CE7AC2&__gda__=1474830092_08b37a845dce5dd1dea966aa00591915)


(https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/13494746_939039592875316_4342731495627613225_n.jpg?oh=25dc0388d47a140a7e4733dfcc8482e0&oe=57E1701C&__gda__=1473214613_de5e1bceed88f2f7f1a2788c1f28adff)


(https://fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xat1/v/t1.0-9/13495113_939393949506547_8721492118536936931_n.jpg?oh=30ed31e995dff2678870aaddbe2675e3&oe=57CAA657&__gda__=1474726024_e2481de49b2ccc484c9ed8a09dff5917)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 27, 2016, 12:38:07 PM
The philosophy student was invited to a brothel by his room-mates, but decided to stay home and study.

He put Descartes before the whores...
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 27, 2016, 12:39:37 PM
(https://scontent-amt2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13524346_1078656638838698_5043674929190406148_n.jpg?oh=6e510c825f611284773cec4ce9f74776&oe=57F228A1)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on June 27, 2016, 12:50:17 PM
 Lots of laughs interspersed with some groans.

Something must be corrupted - whenever I try to access the extended emoticons, I get a site saying 'about blank'. Any suggestions?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on June 27, 2016, 07:22:07 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.twentytwowords.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2FTearable-Puns-e1335438183335-634x692.jpg&hash=94cfe5f213f8b5cb1df9628986c1df1f651babc9)

(https://sajithansar.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/20130322-194353.jpg)

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia-cache-ec0.pinimg.com%2Foriginals%2F4c%2Fae%2F65%2F4cae65dc5bf83042a16f99c26db3a8aa.jpg&hash=3606f9582a343ad8dc44093d7fe2fd9be526a30e)

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.baconwrappedmedia.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F12%2Ffunny-puns-bacon-wrapped-media-2.jpg&hash=fe430ef5be0e233491a67673533d0a678b567fb4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on June 27, 2016, 10:17:57 PM
(https://i.chzbgr.com/full/5454120704/h51C80782/)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on July 05, 2016, 06:47:44 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/t31.0-8/s960x960/13580393_10154173644735953_3666565942709246669_o.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 05, 2016, 10:35:44 AM
Be careful about how you use puns, there were Punic Wars in olden times!

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on July 05, 2016, 10:24:40 PM
(https://pastorwardclinton.files.wordpress.com/2016/07/titanic-pickle.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on July 10, 2016, 07:44:41 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/13615197_10153641041986867_4795545909084938584_n.jpg?oh=a76424f28f3a76730732ffdee57ced85&oe=582C41EB)
Title: What . . .
Post by: Dave on July 17, 2016, 08:58:44 PM
. . . do you get if you cross a pickle with a deer?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
.

. . . do you get if you pour vinegar in your ear?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
.

. . . is green and has two wheels?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
.


[Groan]
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 17, 2016, 10:41:09 PM
What has a 1000cc engine, two wheels and cuts grass?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on July 21, 2016, 07:32:17 AM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s526x395/13775862_1722639018001344_5227558852049630925_n.jpg?oh=3cb4711bc92c616c9e14488ffa1e96de&oe=581A5E73)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on July 21, 2016, 03:04:42 PM
Quote from: Tank on July 21, 2016, 07:32:17 AM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s526x395/13775862_1722639018001344_5227558852049630925_n.jpg?oh=3cb4711bc92c616c9e14488ffa1e96de&oe=581A5E73)

Ok, UK question - Are green onions called chives in the UK?
They do that in Texas, and I always thought it was odd. I mean, when I ask for chives on my baked potato, I don't want green onions. I want chives!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 21, 2016, 05:37:02 PM
Quote from: Tank on July 21, 2016, 07:32:17 AM
(https://scontent.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s526x395/13775862_1722639018001344_5227558852049630925_n.jpg?oh=3cb4711bc92c616c9e14488ffa1e96de&oe=581A5E73)

Chives, here in Britland, look like a grass and you cut leaves as needed and chop them into little rings.

What some Americans call "scallions" or "green onions" seem to be what we call "spring onions" - tops like large chives and a bulb that can vary in size, from not much wider than the stem to a globe maybe 3/4 inch or more across.

One of my favourite foods, so versatile raw or cooked - part of the "holy trinity" of Thai cooking, along with garlic and ginger . . .more of my favourites.

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on July 21, 2016, 06:59:55 PM
Chives growing in a pot. We cut off the 'blades'. These are chives in the UK. I've never seen anybody eating the roots.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs3-eu-west-1.amazonaws.com%2Fseeds-plants-gardening%2Fproduct-images%2Fop%2Fz%2F21328z.jpg&hash=35cc4ddc72d88531dab92831ad9b14088902a3cb)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 21, 2016, 07:38:02 PM
Quote from: Tank on July 21, 2016, 06:59:55 PM
Chives growing in a pot. We cut off the 'blades'. These are chives in the UK. I've never seen anybody eating the roots.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs3-eu-west-1.amazonaws.com%2Fseeds-plants-gardening%2Fproduct-images%2Fop%2Fz%2F21328z.jpg&hash=35cc4ddc72d88531dab92831ad9b14088902a3cb)
Shall we start a food and drink thread, Tank?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on July 21, 2016, 07:54:02 PM
Yes... That's what I call chives as well.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 24, 2016, 04:45:49 PM
What did the mother buffalo say when her son left? Bison.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on July 24, 2016, 04:49:17 PM
We already have a foodie thread, I think.

We also eat the chive blade in the US, chopped up and put on baked potatoes, usually.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Siz on July 24, 2016, 04:58:30 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on July 24, 2016, 04:45:49 PM
What did the mother buffalo say when her son left? Bison.

What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?
You can't wash your hands in a buffalo.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 24, 2016, 04:59:54 PM
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on July 24, 2016, 04:49:17 PM
We already have a foodie thread, I think.

We also eat the chive blade in the US, chopped up and put on baked potatoes, usually.

Mixed with cottage cheese or a cheese sauce is nice as well. I have used then as a garnish, sprinkled over fried chicken strips just before service - just the gentlest taste of onion.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on July 24, 2016, 05:12:54 PM
Since we are talking food, lettuce turnip the beet.  I donut understand puns, usually.  But I try to romaine calm.  But if the subject is food, peas don't make me hungry!  All this talk about foods that I can't eat is bacon my heart. 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 24, 2016, 05:38:04 PM
"Keep clear of the muesli people"

"The who?"

"You know, the fruits, flakes and nuts!"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on July 30, 2016, 02:32:31 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CojekNsWgAEMbvc.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 09, 2016, 01:50:35 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13886893_619762314867798_8809698120173182948_n.jpg?oh=d891f7658a5b28052f28f97f933952f8&oe=581C8154)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 09, 2016, 06:51:47 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13886927_1424453610904895_8930143069760100930_n.jpg?oh=c6eefe871c3b9a04076c57f03b8665d9&oe=585B28F0)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 14, 2016, 07:23:32 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/13912626_10153974815119247_901447889923849287_n.jpg?oh=7920954baf336861aecf5aa73e02292d&oe=5855BBAA)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 19, 2016, 10:22:46 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13912868_978244508954824_6187901087803738868_n.jpg?oh=70124b0ddd24f257228ceb126d7a4057&oe=58187F8E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 20, 2016, 03:51:53 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on August 19, 2016, 10:22:46 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13912868_978244508954824_6187901087803738868_n.jpg?oh=70124b0ddd24f257228ceb126d7a4057&oe=58187F8E)

Hey! That's a gas!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 21, 2016, 12:25:31 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14040083_1136516583079118_7084809171345552127_n.jpg?oh=e64c89cd3decbc82b7ed11fd217b0222&oe=58125A4C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 01, 2016, 06:58:15 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14184352_913796878725913_2599148380465692622_n.jpg?oh=84cfa44c02e9a2c8f850d8784db83f09&oe=584C9B97)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on September 01, 2016, 02:41:10 PM
^^ (*ow*)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 03, 2016, 04:51:47 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14225628_10154441391101730_3965748661629378627_n.jpg?oh=30cf701a2d1cf220e5ebe3333fee2abd&oe=584AAA4C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on September 04, 2016, 07:21:38 AM
Quote from: Tank on September 03, 2016, 04:51:47 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14225628_10154441391101730_3965748661629378627_n.jpg?oh=30cf701a2d1cf220e5ebe3333fee2abd&oe=584AAA4C)

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 07, 2016, 01:18:48 PM
12 Pun Costumes for Halloween (http://mentalfloss.com/article/69648/12-pun-costumes-halloween)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on September 07, 2016, 02:39:51 PM
^^^  ;D :o ;)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 11, 2016, 04:07:12 PM
I don't know if this has been posted before, but here goes.  ;D

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.diply.com%2Farticle-images%2Fa%2Fcad7d554-abcf-445a-abd2-6858fbe2e143.jpg%3Fimpolicy%3Ddesktop&hash=279b246d4e1930b871e9508d6ffb5c1bcaf7d3bf)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 17, 2016, 12:29:54 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14359165_1002626529849955_6032879031485119833_n.jpg?oh=78d3bbcbc9d79242e5de179574ad259b&oe=58801AAC)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on September 17, 2016, 09:05:11 AM
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xft1/v/t1.0-9/14291926_1117015731712076_3983935461880573557_n.jpg?oh=98550841dada1e29f7ce4a0e66aa24fe&oe=58795721&__gda__=1484749632_4511c9c054eaccd0daecb582676eb309)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on September 17, 2016, 11:56:18 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 17, 2016, 12:29:54 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14359165_1002626529849955_6032879031485119833_n.jpg?oh=78d3bbcbc9d79242e5de179574ad259b&oe=58801AAC)

That's where the bear rolls his eyes, does an absent-minded slapping gesture and we see the deer with its bear hands and all flying through the air into a tree, yes?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 17, 2016, 04:57:07 PM
Yes, I believe that would be the most likely sequence of events. :smilenod:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on September 19, 2016, 11:14:09 AM
What did the pirate say when he found his peg leg in his freezer?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 04, 2016, 12:37:53 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14479582_1016981625081112_6345478586190054664_n.jpg?oh=9be4dea30455612f1b50302ad2b854d3&oe=5875A3E4)

(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14484810_1012481635531111_5814583293278239582_n.jpg?oh=8375e44389e4c149a818dbfb16f3a668&oe=58702261)

(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14355588_1010212252424716_9214351725889847512_n.jpg?oh=553242e3c8c1834ae6afd2822bc5d030&oe=5876432D)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on October 22, 2016, 07:41:37 PM
(https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/14523034_1299771356732222_1286950892501906594_n.jpg?oh=bc261160d1f6183c2d6fbaef76a9beba&oe=58982F6E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on November 13, 2016, 04:51:09 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15094904_1173309552749360_5998128970454871428_n.jpg?oh=f18db95c9af8788eed1b5800ec9f185c&oe=58CFCE29)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 13, 2016, 06:28:27 PM
Never trust an atom, they make up everything. 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on November 13, 2016, 11:12:34 PM
Quote from: Tom62 on October 22, 2016, 07:41:37 PM
(https://scontent-frt3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/14523034_1299771356732222_1286950892501906594_n.jpg?oh=bc261160d1f6183c2d6fbaef76a9beba&oe=58982F6E)

I want this as my Christmas cards.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on November 21, 2016, 08:18:23 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15032304_1304315672952777_5593845359595554987_n.jpg?oh=fdac34e5b81ccfb65b73ac2ddae7ef98&oe=58B6910B)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Asmodean on November 22, 2016, 12:18:52 PM
Also, that one had a rattie in it.

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F-enzi6ohgME8%2FTyqTPAiD73I%2FAAAAAAAAAKU%2FKwRvLqo7l8E%2Fs1600%2Fhappy-roll-happy-animation-animated-smiley-emoticon-000359-large.gif&hash=d0eb9b0c0f873b5e37ad07b1b4d354ad21b69a26)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 22, 2016, 05:57:57 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15094850_675609789283050_7684643256817153023_n.jpg?oh=453e7b0f84ad1c6d61fa4ade453b8882&oe=58C5EF2A)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 07, 2017, 11:43:45 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15826332_987594878038209_7052191164344868999_n.jpg?oh=081bb5a20098cd3c94543752d272a475&oe=58D7A132)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 09, 2017, 05:58:25 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15966038_942823322483782_613312440920060637_n.png?oh=2d4d512d710efe760770435530146141&oe=5917EC44)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 08, 2017, 12:55:46 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/18300895_744542362381211_2129206807909471644_n.jpg?oh=14ca9ddba87d79e4b15e10d40d96b3e1&oe=59BB33E3)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 12:45:03 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/18301147_447386848953778_1019428793379185064_n.jpg?oh=18cee9a6228e77932f4419a93776e82d&oe=59C2A44E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these puns* on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 10:15:27 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.

Me too.  :scratch:

I think I'm missing something here.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 01:44:01 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 10:15:27 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.

Me too.  :scratch:

I think I'm missing something here.

Glad I am not the only dense one here. Arturo, put us out of our misery and explain, please.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 01:44:01 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 10:15:27 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.

Me too.  :scratch:

I think I'm missing something here.

Glad I am not the only dense one here. Arturo, put us out of our misery and explain, please.

While Arturo keeps us in suspense over his pun here's one:

Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:43:00 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".

The Irish are going to get you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 09, 2017, 05:44:17 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:43:00 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".

The Irish are going to get you.

Fortunately I'm Polish ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:55:03 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 05:44:17 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:43:00 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".

The Irish are going to get you.

Fortunately I'm Polish ;D
You can't hide from the Garda. They are everywhere, protecting God's good name.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 10, 2017, 09:58:51 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:55:03 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 05:44:17 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:43:00 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".

The Irish are going to get you.

Fortunately I'm Polish ;D
You can't hide from the Garda. They are everywhere, protecting God's good name.

If the Blarney Stone were Jesus, would kissing it make me Gaelic too?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on May 11, 2017, 05:45:59 AM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 10, 2017, 09:58:51 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:55:03 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 05:44:17 PM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 05:43:00 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 09, 2017, 03:24:09 PM
Maybe Jesus was actually a gay man and was simply saying, "Ah...men".

The Irish are going to get you.

Fortunately I'm Polish ;D
You can't hide from the Garda. They are everywhere, protecting God's good name.

If the Blarney Stone were Jesus, would kissing it make me Gaelic too?

No, it would be a gay lick.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on May 11, 2017, 07:18:19 AM
^
:picard facepalm:

[Definitely having probs with multiple nested quotes shiwing as an "empty" text!]
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 13, 2017, 02:12:02 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/18425379_1074751925989170_405500457481829667_n.jpg?oh=35a268d09782f797b9f29bf7f2cfd831&oe=597A060F)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 16, 2017, 12:35:02 AM
Quote from: Gloucester on May 11, 2017, 07:18:19 AM
^
:picard facepalm:

[Definitely having probs with multiple nested quotes shiwing as an "empty" text!]

It's not just you, I had this problem on my tablet.  :scratch:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 19, 2017, 01:43:29 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/18581525_1078522958945400_6976037905461276515_n.jpg?oh=beda033c6ed23e070a351cafee6976e2&oe=59771A68)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 19, 2017, 04:45:43 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 01:44:01 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 10:15:27 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.

Me too.  :scratch:

I think I'm missing something here.

Glad I am not the only dense one here. Arturo, put us out of our misery and explain, please.

It just came e off really sexual to me
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on May 19, 2017, 06:10:33 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 19, 2017, 04:45:43 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 01:44:01 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2017, 10:15:27 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on May 09, 2017, 06:15:00 AM
Quote from: Arturo on May 09, 2017, 02:38:21 AM
So my professor made these pins on the first day of class today.

"You can earn extra credit for seeing me for 15 minutes"

"Now why would I want you to see me? Any guesses?"

*Awkward silence*

"Maybe so you can ask me questions like what MY major is, although that should be obvious"

This is killing me! Please point out the pun, because I am too stupid to see it.

Me too.  :scratch:

I think I'm missing something here.

Glad I am not the only dense one here. Arturo, put us out of our misery and explain, please.

It just came e off really sexual to me

Oh, I get it now!  ;D
...I think.  :notsure:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 27, 2017, 07:50:35 PM
There was a large part of a tree missing after a storm. I guess it wanted to leave, but it still had roots holding it there.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 30, 2017, 06:52:03 AM
And remember. . . Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 30, 2017, 04:18:21 PM
Quote from: Tank on May 30, 2017, 06:52:03 AM
And remember. . . Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

:lol: That's a good one!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on May 30, 2017, 06:05:25 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 30, 2017, 04:18:21 PM
Quote from: Tank on May 30, 2017, 06:52:03 AM
And remember. . . Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

:lol: That's a good one!

I agree, that's really funny ;D

Going to try it out on my son tonight, see what he thinks.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 30, 2017, 06:58:48 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on May 30, 2017, 06:05:25 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on May 30, 2017, 04:18:21 PM
Quote from: Tank on May 30, 2017, 06:52:03 AM
And remember. . . Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

:lol: That's a good one!

I agree, that's really funny ;D

Going to try it out on my son tonight, see what he thinks.
Have a banana handy when you tell him!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on June 01, 2017, 07:25:38 PM
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking outside the window when he said, "It's going to rain".

His wife asked, "How do you know?".

"Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear".
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on June 01, 2017, 07:42:51 PM
Bloke, way out in the Ozzie outback, really did a job on his car's gearbox, lots of wheels, no teeth.

He radioed in for the delivery of a new set of gears from the dealers. In stock but can't deliver for a month. After lots of pleading he gets them to load them on the local air shuttle, but that's too big to land at his place so - they agree to parachute them.

Two days later; the shuttle is passing over and he sees the crate thrown out. The  chute opens with a big snap and a jerk. So big in fact the crate disintegrates and its contents fall free.

"Dammit!" he shouts to his wife, "Take cover, it's raining Datsun cogs!"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 26, 2017, 09:03:40 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19423989_1106874472776915_6216993166635630364_n.jpg?oh=43362ae9cc002a4026b20cfb883424db&oe=59D936EB)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on June 28, 2017, 04:31:16 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FrVpeob4.png&hash=8722a5e5822757750884e7a52033367d5a27ce76)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on June 30, 2017, 02:18:33 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19437490_1599308940088173_3217067175793340258_n.jpg?oh=5f32683cbe73a4f660deb31779a092a6&oe=59D85400)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on June 30, 2017, 06:46:05 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on June 30, 2017, 02:18:33 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19437490_1599308940088173_3217067175793340258_n.jpg?oh=5f32683cbe73a4f660deb31779a092a6&oe=59D85400)

I get it!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on June 30, 2017, 11:53:07 PM
^^ :far out:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Claireliontamer on July 04, 2017, 11:31:31 AM
(https://scontent.fman2-2.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19598899_1345357955500974_1090468581943354911_n.jpg?oh=e99c0ba980a2dd0903e495e0bb5175ff&oe=59D88844)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 04, 2017, 05:39:51 PM
^ :lol:

I had to say that three times fast before I finally got it! :P

At least, I think I got it...

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on July 04, 2017, 06:10:24 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on July 04, 2017, 05:39:51 PM
^ :lol:

I had to say that three times fast before I finally got it! :P

At least, I think I got it...

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


It was too abstruse for me, my excuse is that dleepless night - yawwwwn.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 07, 2017, 09:58:46 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19701989_1114635398667489_1694613325835271552_n.png?oh=70b0d627175420119f730866b5557b3e&oe=59CA52BA)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 14, 2017, 02:14:50 AM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BqbNvfHIQAAkFL1.png)

(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/88/5d/e1/885de124d5507fc36dc12fc007753cba--grammar-quotes-grammar-posters.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on July 18, 2017, 07:39:07 PM
(https://s3.amazonaws.com/lowres.jantoo.com/bars-clubs-inn-tavens-taverns-attack-army-36531023_low.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on July 21, 2017, 08:56:37 PM
Hare Krishna!


You're going to be late for school!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on July 24, 2017, 11:59:48 PM
^  :rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on August 08, 2017, 08:31:12 PM
How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?...A Brazilian!


Where do animals go when their tails fall off?...A Retail Store!


What kind of bagel can fly?...A Plain Bagel!


Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?..He worked his problem out with a pencil...It was a #2!


What's Forrest Gump's password?...1Forrest1!


So two snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...Ba Da Ting!

:rimshot:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on August 08, 2017, 08:54:34 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on August 08, 2017, 08:31:12 PM
How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?...A Brazilian!


Where do animals go when their tails fall off?...A Retail Store!


What kind of bagel can fly?...A Plain Bagel!


Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?..He worked his problem out with a pencil...It was a #2!


What's Forrest Gump's password?...1Forrest1!


So two snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...Ba Da Ting!

:rimshot:

Ouch!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 08, 2017, 10:51:55 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on August 08, 2017, 08:31:12 PM
How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?...A Brazilian!


Where do animals go when their tails fall off?...A Retail Store!


What kind of bagel can fly?...A Plain Bagel!


Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?..He worked his problem out with a pencil...It was a #2!


What's Forrest Gump's password?...1Forrest1!


So two snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...Ba Da Ting!

:rimshot:

Those are very good, Father Bruno, especially the first one. :P
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on August 09, 2017, 11:05:29 PM
Laughed at them all, especially #5.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on August 09, 2017, 11:45:30 PM
I just listened to Justin Bieber, now I have hearing aids.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 01, 2017, 03:21:59 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/20953307_1469170416508942_3887264240557461951_n.png?oh=62f44671cee6d8c6952a8acee8b15c55&oe=5A1548B9)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on September 02, 2017, 02:14:34 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 01, 2017, 03:21:59 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/20953307_1469170416508942_3887264240557461951_n.png?oh=62f44671cee6d8c6952a8acee8b15c55&oe=5A1548B9)

(ouch!)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on September 07, 2017, 02:30:28 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.slowrobot.com%2F810201722283826162.jpg&hash=ff6ddf00d41d7542dda904e0fc478d29600b0d4c)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 12, 2017, 12:43:49 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21462365_1348024668643471_694188090423047993_n.jpg?oh=9bd18f8e86179a2a2ea3e23f3860484c&oe=5A1B9559)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 12, 2017, 12:44:22 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21617580_2368790523449718_2097194906958946812_n.jpg?oh=597f7beb575aff36b85a05552791a954&oe=5A56378C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 14, 2017, 12:29:46 AM
:grin: This one's for Mags:

"I threw a butter out the window the other day, I wanted to see a butter fly."

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on September 14, 2017, 06:19:57 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 14, 2017, 12:29:46 AM
:grin: This one's for Mags:

"I threw a butter out the window the other day, I wanted to see a butter fly."
:rimshot:

:snicker:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 14, 2017, 11:46:24 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21743307_1351308738315064_774514898283407600_n.jpg?oh=5286fdcfe9e4ef6598b3b592f9db4529&oe=5A48931D)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on September 16, 2017, 01:14:01 AM
Do you think in black and white terms?

Yes or No?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 18, 2017, 03:15:02 PM
^ :lol:

There are two types of people in this world: those who say there are two types of people and those who don't.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 18, 2017, 04:11:23 PM
Quote from: Arturo on September 16, 2017, 01:14:01 AM
Do you think in black and white terms?

Yes or No?

Ummm, maybe?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 18, 2017, 04:15:08 PM
Another one of those anoying no-goes that went!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 18, 2017, 04:42:46 PM
How come the roll of toilette paper couldn't cross the road?

Because it got stuck in a crack.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on September 18, 2017, 04:56:12 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 18, 2017, 04:42:46 PM
How come the roll of toilette paper couldn't cross the road?

Because it got stuck in a crack.

That's a Fun Bun Pun, Hon. 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 18, 2017, 05:00:07 PM
Quote from: Ecurb Noselrub on September 18, 2017, 04:56:12 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 18, 2017, 04:42:46 PM
How come the roll of toilette paper couldn't cross the road?

Because it got stuck in a crack.

That's a Fun Bun Pun, Hon.

As opposed to a bum bum pun, chum?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 20, 2017, 10:37:00 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21558986_1686034734748926_1217592862334443118_n.jpg?oh=3783c7e0aa91ec43f643d3d2a61bc8f2&oe=5A4C483E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 21, 2017, 04:02:09 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 20, 2017, 10:37:00 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21558986_1686034734748926_1217592862334443118_n.jpg?oh=3783c7e0aa91ec43f643d3d2a61bc8f2&oe=5A4C483E)
:rofl:

Looks like it could need 1 000 000 Ohmmmms!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 21, 2017, 08:50:34 AM
With 1 000 000 Ohmmmms you could probably resist anything!  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 21, 2017, 09:14:06 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 21, 2017, 08:50:34 AM
With 1 000 000 Ohmmmms you could probably resist anything!  ;D

Well, looks like it is a fsirly tolerant entity, it might be satisfied with only 950 000 Ommmms
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 21, 2017, 09:43:55 AM
Quote from: Dave on September 21, 2017, 09:14:06 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 21, 2017, 08:50:34 AM
With 1 000 000 Ohmmmms you could probably resist anything!  ;D

Well, looks like it is a fsirly tolerant entity, it might be satisfied with only 950 000 Ommmms

Heheh! :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:27:54 AM
Darth Vader asks someone if they saw his son.

They reply, "What does he Luke like?"

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi0.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Fmobile%2F000%2F000%2F107%2Fsmily.jpg&hash=26424be4c861177b0dec788dfc926cf31fc5c8a6)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 23, 2017, 07:32:42 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:27:54 AM
Darth Vader asks someone if they saw his son.

They reply, "What does he Luke like?"

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi0.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Fmobile%2F000%2F000%2F107%2Fsmily.jpg&hash=26424be4c861177b0dec788dfc926cf31fc5c8a6)

That was a Terry-ble pun. When the sound of puking Peters out I'll Collin the clean-up squad.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:42:15 AM
Quote from: Dave on September 23, 2017, 07:32:42 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:27:54 AM
Darth Vader asks someone if they saw his son.

They reply, "What does he Luke like?"

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi0.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Fmobile%2F000%2F000%2F107%2Fsmily.jpg&hash=26424be4c861177b0dec788dfc926cf31fc5c8a6)

That was a Terry-ble pun. When the sound of puking Peters out I'll Collin the clean-up squad.

Aww come on. :grin: It wasn't so Brad.

(OK, that didn't work so well. :lol:)

Good thing there's no such thing as chilli/tomato hybrids out there!

(https://image.ibb.co/b5AGRk/3lR0nzT.gif)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on September 23, 2017, 07:59:16 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:42:15 AM
Quote from: Dave on September 23, 2017, 07:32:42 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 07:27:54 AM
Darth Vader asks someone if they saw his son.

They reply, "What does he Luke like?"

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi0.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Fmobile%2F000%2F000%2F107%2Fsmily.jpg&hash=26424be4c861177b0dec788dfc926cf31fc5c8a6)

That was a Terry-ble pun. When the sound of puking Peters out I'll Collin the clean-up squad.

Aww come on. :grin: It wasn't so Brad.

(OK, that didn't work so well. :lol:)

Good thing there's no such thing as chilli/tomato hybrids out there!

All puns aside (cuz this will be abad one) a tomato/chilli hybrid sounds like it would make a good chilli

*breathe in*
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
*breathe out*
Now think of something not so stupid a what I've just said. Like cats. Or puppies. Or turtles.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 23, 2017, 09:01:38 AM
What do you call someone who has an inherent psychological hatred of two wheeled transport?

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 23, 2017, 09:45:35 AM
Sooooo tempted to give you a 24 ban for that!  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 23, 2017, 11:22:18 AM
Too late but it would have been better the other way round;

"What is a cycle-path?" .

"A person who has . . ."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 23, 2017, 02:45:56 PM
Quote from: Tank on September 23, 2017, 09:45:35 AM
Sooooo tempted to give you a 24 ban for that!  ;D

:snicker:

Be careful Dave, the way to hell is paved with punishable puns!

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:22 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
:picard facepalm:

5/10 Marx for that
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 08:06:05 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.reactiongifs.com%2Fr%2Fsrcstc.gif&hash=5393098ae39be96b0cd5a7b011ac2e69d5153df8)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 29, 2017, 09:26:09 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!
I don't think it's Wright to treat other people that way. Besides, Heil probably join in no matter what you say.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:27:59 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!

Watts? OK, all Wright, but I was in this before you Monk!

[Beaten to the Wright post there![
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 09:45:10 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 09:26:09 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!
I don't think it's Wright to treat other people that way. Besides, Heil probably join in no matter what you say.

You're right Davin, I was wrong to treat him that way, but he can be so Deleuze-nal!


Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:27:59 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!

Watts? OK, all Wright, but I was in this before you Monk!

[Beaten to the Wright post there![

Hah, you Lyotard...Davin and I have been doing this for days!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on September 29, 2017, 09:45:36 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:27:59 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!

Watts? OK, all Wright, but I was in this before you Monk!

[Beaten to the Wright post there![

It's not very Priestly to be so exclusive
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 09:48:26 PM
Quote from: Essie Mae on September 29, 2017, 09:45:36 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:27:59 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 09:19:56 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 09:11:26 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:54:09 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 08:32:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 08:22:46 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 06:00:48 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 05:45:32 PM
Quote from: Guardian85 on September 29, 2017, 03:34:00 PM
I'm trying to come up with a pun about philosophy, but I Kant.
Maybe puns just aren't your Nietzsche.
:picard facepalm: :picard facepalm:

8/10 Marx for this follow-up.
Oh... now you've Dennet!

You are all Spinoza control!
No, sir. I'm Unger control.

NO YOU ARENDT!

Stop shouting, FrB, you are Acton badly.

It's getting to be a Paine to catch up!

Think I'll console myself with a Bacon sarnie.

HEY DAVE!

This is between Davin and me so why don't you just Levinas alone!!

Watts? OK, all Wright, but I was in this before you Monk!

[Beaten to the Wright post there![

It's not very Priestly to be so exclusive

How Rand another one 8)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on September 29, 2017, 09:59:47 PM
I'm sure that there are others Chompksy at the bit to Noam their favorite philosophers.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 29, 2017, 10:05:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 09:59:47 PM
I'm sure that there are others Chompksy at the bit to Noam their favorite philosophers.

Yeah, don't be a party Popper, join in folks!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 29, 2017, 10:07:39 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 29, 2017, 10:05:02 PM
Quote from: Davin on September 29, 2017, 09:59:47 PM
I'm sure that there are others Chompksy at the bit to Noam their favorite philosophers.

Yeah, don't be a party Popper, join in folks!

Well Dave, you and Davin will have to deal with them yourselves as I've got to head out to my yoga class, so I'll just get the Foucault of here!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on September 30, 2017, 01:01:25 AM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 10:07:39 PM
Well Dave, you and Davin will have to deal with them yourselves as I've got to head out to my yoga class, so I'll just get the Foucault of here!
Awwwww...Father, yoga to go?  :sadcheer:
Namast'ay.  :snicker:

Father, is it true that men that go to yoga classes are very loose?  :notsure:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 30, 2017, 06:52:56 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on September 30, 2017, 01:01:25 AM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 10:07:39 PM
Well Dave, you and Davin will have to deal with them yourselves as I've got to head out to my yoga class, so I'll just get the Foucault of here!
Awwwww...Father, yoga to go?  :sadcheer:
Namast'ay.  :snicker:

Father, is it true that men that go to yoga classes are very loose?  :notsure:

Namaste Magdalena... Namaste :notworthy:

I'm not sure what you mean by loose Mags, perhaps you are referring to my flexibility? If so than yes, I'm have become quite flexible during my years of practice...or perhaps you mean loose like an adulterer or a fornicater, a hussy, a jade, a strumpet, a trollop, a fornicator? ;D

Nah, I'm a good boy. ;)

Anyway I was Chomsky at the bit last night waiting to see how the philosphy pun thread was going to continue on without me, but I think you killed it Mags... :'(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on September 30, 2017, 08:46:36 PM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 30, 2017, 06:52:56 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on September 30, 2017, 01:01:25 AM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 29, 2017, 10:07:39 PM
Well Dave, you and Davin will have to deal with them yourselves as I've got to head out to my yoga class, so I'll just get the Foucault of here!
Awwwww...Father, yoga to go?  :sadcheer:
Namast'ay.  :snicker:

Father, is it true that men that go to yoga classes are very loose?  :notsure:

Namaste Magdalena... Namaste :notworthy:

I'm not sure what you mean by loose Mags, perhaps you are referring to my flexibility? If so than yes, I'm have become quite flexible during my years of practice...or perhaps you mean loose like an adulterer or a fornicater, a hussy, a jade, a strumpet, a trollop, a fornicator? ;D

Nah, I'm a good boy. ;)

Anyway I was Chomsky at the bit last night waiting to see how the philosphy pun thread was going to continue on without me, but I think you killed it Mags... :'(
(https://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/glee/images/c/c2/AAAAAAAAA.gif/revision/latest?cb=20130102012342)
I did, didn't I?
:grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 30, 2017, 09:07:24 PM
Yeah, Mags, you Poppered the party!

Well, put a temporary Block on it any way. But I have been Turing through the names and am thinking it might become a bit of a Bohr to keep Hacking away at this theme. So, on Sober reflection I'll call it a day -  just make that day November 16th, World Philisophy Day.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on October 01, 2017, 04:24:22 AM
I would join in the fun, but I always Plato win, so I won't spoil it for you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on October 01, 2017, 06:02:47 AM
Quote from: Father Bruno on September 30, 2017, 06:52:56 PM
I think you killed it Mags... :'(

Quote from: Dave on September 30, 2017, 09:07:24 PM
Yeah, Mags, you Poppered the party!

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.reactiongifs.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F10%2Fwhatever.gif&hash=77d9d4449356b87f20d7a75392b068f737026ce2)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 12, 2017, 01:52:19 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/22308752_1377226362389968_1532384173043669007_n.jpg?oh=2ee36d1f816fbcd692b966546e59e5bd&oe=5A7C9FDF)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 22, 2017, 10:50:44 PM
Got this in a message:

1: What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
2: What?
1: Nothing, they just waved.
2: :picard facepalm:
1: Sea what I did there?
2: No.
1: Shore you did!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on October 23, 2017, 06:07:30 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 22, 2017, 10:50:44 PM
Got this in a message:

1: What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
2: What?
1: Nothing, they just waved.
2: :picard facepalm:
1: Sea what I did there?
2: No.
1: Shore you did!

That is an abysmal joke! Plumbs the very depths of humour...
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on October 23, 2017, 10:07:25 PM
Quite impressive; definitely in my 'so bad it's good' class
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 23, 2017, 10:37:07 PM
Quote from: Dave on October 23, 2017, 06:07:30 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 22, 2017, 10:50:44 PM
Got this in a message:

1: What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
2: What?
1: Nothing, they just waved.
2: :picard facepalm:
1: Sea what I did there?
2: No.
1: Shore you did!

That is an abysmal joke! Plumbs the very depths of humour...

:grin:

Sometimes you look into the abyss and a bad joke looks right back at you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on October 23, 2017, 11:05:24 PM
Another bad joke as follows........

My girlfriend thinks that I am a midget piano player

Why does she say that?

I dunno, she keeps saying something about a tiny pianis.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 31, 2017, 05:20:53 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/22788766_1175732489192863_2860445004473309061_n.jpg?oh=8467818a4a1397df0419a02be9ff797e&oe=5AADFE2E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on October 31, 2017, 11:41:22 PM
Need to build an ark?  I Noah guy who can do it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on November 01, 2017, 07:32:22 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on October 31, 2017, 05:20:53 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/22788766_1175732489192863_2860445004473309061_n.jpg?oh=8467818a4a1397df0419a02be9ff797e&oe=5AADFE2E)

(*ouch*)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 06, 2017, 08:29:45 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/23130978_1188981464566215_7133827141203006588_n.png?oh=aa2421c8c67c8dee2100e34d1d601ecd&oe=5AA6BAA5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on November 07, 2017, 11:15:52 PM
Are you an astronomy buff Silver?    I can see Orion on most nights in the southern sky. The old boy has more than three objects in his belt, Only three of them are prominent. Messier objects are nearby. For you he will be in your northern sky if he is visible there at all.  You will be able to see many things that I can not see, 'cause I am on the north side of the equator. 

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on November 08, 2017, 06:09:18 AM
 
QuoteMessier objects are nearby.

'Bout time someone cleaned them up then!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on November 08, 2017, 07:33:14 PM
Quote from: Dave on November 08, 2017, 06:09:18 AM

QuoteMessier objects are nearby.

'Bout time someone cleaned them up then!

beat me to it...
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 08, 2017, 11:34:32 PM
Quote from: Icarus on November 07, 2017, 11:15:52 PM
Are you an astronomy buff Silver?    I can see Orion on most nights in the southern sky. The old boy has more than three objects in his belt, Only three of them are prominent. Messier objects are nearby. For you he will be in your northern sky if he is visible there at all.  You will be able to see many things that I can not see, 'cause I am on the north side of the equator.

Hell yes! I wanted to be an astrophysicist when I was a kid, but that didn't work out unfortunately...can't get those numbers and formulas into my head to save my life.  ;D

Orion is an easily seen constellation here, and the three bright stars are called the 'Three Marys'.

There's a cool free software called Stellarium if you're interested, where you can see the location and time of appearance of constellations and planets from any point on Earth. 
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 08, 2017, 11:34:55 PM
Quote from: Dave on November 08, 2017, 06:09:18 AM

QuoteMessier objects are nearby.

'Bout time someone cleaned them up then!

:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on November 09, 2017, 12:14:08 AM
I'd be an astronomy hound if conditions were a bit different.  I live in the city where light pollution is a problem.  My weather patterns are such that there are clear skies rarely in the summer, spring, or fall.  The winter skies are often clear and "seeing" is good.  I am not happy when I am cold, so I am not inclined to spend much time outdoors at 4 or 5 A.M. when the temp is low even though conditions are good.

I had an eight inch Dobsonian reflector for a while.  It was a hell of an instrument but it was really heavy, as any competent telescope needs to be.  I became weary of hauling it around because of its bulk.  I now have a mickey mouse little 80mm refractor. It is a good quality instrument but more appropriate for bird watching than for scanning the  Pleiades. (the seven sisters have more than seven objects. I could find them with the eight incher)..... I am told the the badge on Subaru cars are a reference to the Pleiades. ...... Hoop de doo for my Subaru.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on November 09, 2017, 12:50:08 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on November 08, 2017, 11:34:32 PM
Quote from: Icarus on November 07, 2017, 11:15:52 PM
Are you an astronomy buff Silver?    I can see Orion on most nights in the southern sky. The old boy has more than three objects in his belt, Only three of them are prominent. Messier objects are nearby. For you he will be in your northern sky if he is visible there at all.  You will be able to see many things that I can not see, 'cause I am on the north side of the equator.

Hell yes! I wanted to be an astrophysicist when I was a kid, but that didn't work out unfortunately...can't get those numbers and formulas into my head to save my life.  ;D

Orion is an easily seen constellation here, and the three bright stars are called the 'Three Marys'.

There's a cool free software called Stellarium if you're interested, where you can see the location and time of appearance of constellations and planets from any point on Earth.

There's an app for tablets where you point the tablet in any direction, including straight down, and can "see" all the stars, planets and galaxies on a map. Includes data about those things as well.. Brilliant!

Almost worth buying a tsblet for alone.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Biggus Dickus on December 08, 2017, 02:30:03 PM
(https://i.imgur.com/HQxWBiw.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 01, 2018, 07:15:22 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/26166484_1464091730370097_6365483246453217278_n.jpg?oh=7cd1c208d5c52be4b469cc3233e1df62&oe=5AC3B3D4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 08, 2018, 01:24:17 PM
What did one nut say to the other nut as he chased him?

I'm gonna cashew!

:shifty:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 08, 2018, 02:08:42 PM
What are the strongest days of the week?

Saturday and Sunday, all the rest are week days.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Davin on January 08, 2018, 02:27:51 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sharegif.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F03%2Fryan-goslingfacepalmembarrassedconfession.gif&hash=820c6d869ca0663e2f3ad296c557e7fc5fc57eb4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on January 08, 2018, 02:33:34 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on January 08, 2018, 02:08:42 PM
What are the strongest days of the week?

Saturday and Sunday, all the rest are week days.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Hmm, looks like punishable offence, but you are normally so punctillious that to do so would be a fine example of a punctilo - so we'll let you off!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 08, 2018, 02:36:40 PM
 :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 08, 2018, 11:26:12 PM
Oooh! Here's another one! :computerwave:


Why do pirates take so long to learn the alphabet?

Because they can take years at sea.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 11, 2018, 08:28:36 PM
I don't know if this has been posted before but since we can't seem to get enough of bad puns here goes:


What did the buffalo say when his son went to college? Bison... :'(
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on January 23, 2018, 01:43:08 AM
... from Google Home:

Q: What do you do if you have a fear of elevators? A: Just take some steps to avoid them.
Q: Did you hear about the world's largest pickle? A: It's a really big dill.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: I would tell you, but it tends to go over people's heads.
Q: The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.
Q: The best way to carve wood is whittle by whittle.
Q: What do you call a Labrador that becomes a magician? A: A Labracadabrador.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on January 23, 2018, 04:29:57 AM
^^^
Ha!  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 24, 2018, 07:47:32 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/19748558_10155247189853663_7669299474586320790_n.jpg?oh=a22cb06d681613577790960760439c75&oe=5B258E56)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 02, 2018, 12:53:16 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/28577036_1908403242526272_772604249023593826_n.jpg?oh=3d462407194cea2f0843c55abf487115&oe=5B492241)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 02, 2018, 01:25:40 PM
Ohm my god that was bad!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 02, 2018, 02:25:48 PM
Watt are you talking about? It wasn't so bad! :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on March 02, 2018, 04:40:26 PM
The potential difference between you too over this is liable to cause a current of ampmity.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 03, 2018, 02:37:10 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/28378993_1523364714442798_8196334810672008230_n.jpg?oh=3a042083983b90ea3f8f4a8b0bdf9b15&oe=5B426C79)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on March 03, 2018, 02:38:35 PM
^
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on March 03, 2018, 04:49:51 PM
OFFS!! :rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 13, 2018, 07:23:18 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29101942_1711412968919263_6224909716586233856_n.jpg?_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeHl2HMxur9uJJmd160kgiGxECzG3FT29C1MOKk91CDHHpHyKNKkXv5Xz8rxRyiGJZWUdc7EitBBFAcxJ9wQ3Vt431JOQlUDkoAqXncesMpXkA&oh=d9c9fbabffbcf763ca7133a300ef8e0a&oe=5B452DA5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 14, 2018, 10:09:43 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29177557_1752292361496712_8792628234473813847_n.jpg?oh=54e21dd75c03d0a260531937102a8a3e&oe=5B351A3B)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 15, 2018, 01:33:17 AM
Why was the Dark Ages called that?

Because there were too many knights.  :thumbsup2:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 15, 2018, 07:31:09 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29313175_1290443507721760_1194736760739856384_n.jpg?oh=50aad4db1e59715393f742054a1535f0&oe=5B4C1507)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29313557_1753475041378444_2068972319115497970_n.jpg?oh=2619b6f1a68eff9223ff6c22ed31ff47&oe=5B004153)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 16, 2018, 02:04:43 PM
Some more puns for y'all this fine morning. 

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29249101_1754208144638467_3562543997356268300_n.jpg?oh=855ebc908d53788907f61d4c61cc9812&oe=5B4D5BE0)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29216867_10160013441510109_2264445743241119933_n.jpg?_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeGD1ctZyVpDyu-Fv0r2GeKUUlKHqi6P6C1za-pnE0q2j-k-4bjvaQoxHzBn8Bo8_1epIZaCHhTjWk60kk9LhI2r0n8GN7EBbeY_NgrgWWwXXg&oh=4b8c7b9ceb26de67cbbef9795e5c1986&oe=5B456FBA)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29249557_10156383833547022_4145628869346459648_n.jpg?_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeGFHhLTPNbqvmE3n06hMdh5eU1avyYTxiS1zuNqItR5tqTy0aBD_yBNSw8vVmpf_peQc66mad02OiBoKcij0EK2gBBykWNa6kXzpb9tlJ7ZZg&oh=5a957a2eb5bad9699ebf5229d4cf9ac0&oe=5B2BA99F)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on March 16, 2018, 03:27:11 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on March 16, 2018, 02:04:43 PM
Some more puns for y'all this fine morning. 
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29249557_10156383833547022_4145628869346459648_n.jpg?_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeGFHhLTPNbqvmE3n06hMdh5eU1avyYTxiS1zuNqItR5tqTy0aBD_yBNSw8vVmpf_peQc66mad02OiBoKcij0EK2gBBykWNa6kXzpb9tlJ7ZZg&oh=5a957a2eb5bad9699ebf5229d4cf9ac0&oe=5B2BA99F)
:snicker:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 22, 2018, 02:56:27 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29496107_2056117221310851_2606312912582606848_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=e43f5c25c9f452924f13302dd860804e&oe=5B3545A4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 24, 2018, 06:08:52 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29542968_10215798238459801_4784735744347579926_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeHGgiI17kKoSpbYAnURXCGWhiB-GvgJ-PwJvD-bQngaVBa9h5-_NJlc4q74gRix52zpOI09yf0eXPnxO9kJ-nys3-g5giE-EZLxEmPqoYzSiw&oh=ef5cebe640dd2b7ca407a5b7c45a23c9&oe=5B40311B)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 25, 2018, 02:18:02 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29496927_1934072576665900_2412875806273752449_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=4ede560dca4cf2d2e8e8ae0d1aa5871e&oe=5B393AAF)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Guardian85 on March 26, 2018, 01:41:24 AM
I wanted to be a gastric surgeon, but I didn't have the stomach for it.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 26, 2018, 11:02:13 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29512690_10214009993277205_590379128286303638_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeFVprbznvsnv8I2hB8lPEWVdBVIihbABr90U704CoAJMwGsaxpQPpxr1GodRmdmOOfQvPAsLuYEceaV6qbCj9cSa8Gy-j3Mrrx93GwlGjomPg&oh=dda0de42ee53ba6ed277ac6ac272e585&oe=5B3F1A01)

Coming soon! :lol:
Title: Re: Jokes Thread (Was named Anyone know any good jokes ? I'll start :D )
Post by: Biggus Dickus on March 27, 2018, 02:54:07 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/QWh10GG.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 01:56:33 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on January 01, 2018, 07:15:22 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/26166484_1464091730370097_6365483246453217278_n.jpg?oh=7cd1c208d5c52be4b469cc3233e1df62&oe=5AC3B3D4)

This should be "It's my pharaoh-moans"
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 02:00:06 PM
(https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/297240309379629056/427949377173323796/29512974_1299845693448208_1507595851764644819_n.png)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 02:41:01 PM
Babies don't come from China.....

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on March 27, 2018, 06:57:48 PM
Quote from: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 02:41:01 PM
Babies don't come from China.....

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Well, they really come from the uterus. The, "VaChina" is just the "birth canal." Some men also confuse the, "VaChina" with the vulva. Others confuse the, "VaChina" with the urethra, as well.

...Did you want to talk about the vagina, or are you just chit-chatting?  :popcorn:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 07:03:38 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on March 27, 2018, 06:57:48 PM
Quote from: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 02:41:01 PM
Babies don't come from China.....

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Well, they really come from the uterus. The, "VaChina" is just the "birth canal." Some men also confuse the, "VaChina" with the vulva. Others confuse the, "VaChina" with the urethra, as well.

...Did you want to talk about the vagina, or are you just chit-chatting?  :popcorn:

(https://i.pinimg.com/736x/ae/84/70/ae8470a3b2544b8d67a0774ec5c6373e.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 07:04:43 PM
Quote from: Magdalena on March 27, 2018, 06:57:48 PM
Quote from: Arturo on March 27, 2018, 02:41:01 PM
Babies don't come from China.....

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Well, they really come from the uterus. The, "VaChina" is just the "birth canal." Some men also confuse the, "VaChina" with the vulva. Others confuse the, "VaChina" with the urethra, as well.

...Did you want to talk about the vagina, or are you just chit-chatting?  :popcorn:
(https://i.pinimg.com/236x/4c/d3/43/4cd343f97aaed74bd5aa1e2b191757ae.jpg)
(https://i.pinimg.com/736x/06/a8/83/06a8834fa72f8b25eddb880ee8f36e95.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 08, 2018, 07:12:20 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/30265106_1964358613605394_5382398177204764672_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeG7OmuKYZjUcwGOyQarftEguIIhwks_Fu1RbWwAJEiYFmLD6T-p6arC1SetnM6V8GmJ_ZIR_wF4YG1Wp0QqmoEWj5xFcJuhfJjHTEfJPeIN0g&oh=01e908888e0ecd054bb4fb302b67ed35&oe=5B66A3ED)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 10, 2018, 12:59:07 PM
What is a cat's favorite song?

Three Blind Mice.

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on April 10, 2018, 01:00:48 PM
How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony?

It's not hard
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on April 10, 2018, 01:10:22 PM
 :picard facepalm: ^3
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 15, 2018, 04:15:11 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/30710347_1786217681437513_193141222350478474_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeErNfHaQAmi488BUXMwumN5ZjgIKbJZpGa7118U0pt4LQ2mSDDZNgp-fqamMilzcvVi4NAZfBpfVjBTig1ExrB7HyflLXRxib9CyeGDPic-Zw&oh=dfaa53269cbf0e495b8e071f8a1c0d3d&oe=5B5C20C4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 16, 2018, 09:35:52 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/30715746_1461296317316109_4808130261831849304_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=14c8180cabf7d54ddcbc299bac159345&oe=5B28CDF8)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/30712625_1787306811328600_1397450274760969212_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=0c9475886fc3478c9bff9c9850de8b03&oe=5B273EAE)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Magdalena on April 16, 2018, 10:15:03 PM
You always post funny stuff, xSilverPhinx.  :lol:
Thank you.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on April 17, 2018, 12:13:08 AM
Who built the round table?

Sir Cumference.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 22, 2018, 09:48:27 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/31117400_1324005981032179_7124106608002465792_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=02b102147ae3b3554d9218377324da93&oe=5B65C630)

Quote from: Magdalena on April 16, 2018, 10:15:03 PM
You always post funny stuff, xSilverPhinx.  :lol:
Thank you.

I try too. :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 28, 2018, 05:14:20 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/31392631_1799941140065167_5924211122076904431_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeG2LrqWWBHIXCklv0J8-XDpGCy7xrPXwx0sU4KZWQM2FKxtwXVJjs3pUEFGjflYiNqFfDe7YomePTJbGXO-FnlRbZI4LJHnPdmZ3rVT0Ekb5g&oh=3d3f6f8f6697a48fe4a094ba57011fcb&oe=5B511F88)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Arturo on May 19, 2018, 05:47:17 AM
(https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/297240309379629056/425898888491302912/071d194d-ca58-4002-ab8b-574ff3fea715.gif)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on May 30, 2018, 11:25:44 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on April 28, 2018, 05:14:20 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/31392631_1799941140065167_5924211122076904431_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=v1%3AAeG2LrqWWBHIXCklv0J8-XDpGCy7xrPXwx0sU4KZWQM2FKxtwXVJjs3pUEFGjflYiNqFfDe7YomePTJbGXO-FnlRbZI4LJHnPdmZ3rVT0Ekb5g&oh=3d3f6f8f6697a48fe4a094ba57011fcb&oe=5B511F88)

Definitely a 'so bad it's good' contribution😱😀
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 31, 2018, 01:29:00 PM
(https://i.pinimg.com/736x/a9/18/7d/a9187db97ced164cfa3902448c5ad3cb--hush-puppies-funny-puppies.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 31, 2018, 01:29:46 PM
(https://i.pinimg.com/736x/50/02/18/5002181c1ff69ed72ba36d090a4dedf3--cheesy-jokes-corny-jokes.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 31, 2018, 01:31:32 PM
(https://images2.memedroid.com/images/UPLOADED99/536466f84dd5e.jpeg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on May 31, 2018, 02:20:11 PM
^
Oh, ho, ho . . .

:picard facepalm:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on May 31, 2018, 02:48:20 PM
Quote from: Dave on May 31, 2018, 02:20:11 PM
^
Oh, ho, ho . . .

:picard facepalm:

I think Tank might need a time-out...
#YouveGoneTooFar
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on May 31, 2018, 04:07:49 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.izismile.com%2Fimg%2Fimg6%2F20131113%2F640%2Fits_time_to_admit_that_you_secretly_love_puns_640_31.jpg&hash=0779c81a080b79e715d2f073bfc8eab12c59b416)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bad Penny II on June 02, 2018, 03:00:55 PM
Quote from: Tank on May 31, 2018, 04:07:49 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.izismile.com%2Fimg%2Fimg6%2F20131113%2F640%2Fits_time_to_admit_that_you_secretly_love_puns_640_31.jpg&hash=0779c81a080b79e715d2f073bfc8eab12c59b416)

Is your food processor not working?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on June 05, 2018, 07:58:07 AM
Quote from: Bad Penny II on June 02, 2018, 03:00:55 PM
Quote from: Tank on May 31, 2018, 04:07:49 PM
(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.izismile.com%2Fimg%2Fimg6%2F20131113%2F640%2Fits_time_to_admit_that_you_secretly_love_puns_640_31.jpg&hash=0779c81a080b79e715d2f073bfc8eab12c59b416)

Is your food processor not working?
:rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 03, 2018, 02:28:28 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/36487658_1658106757635259_3464937528581160960_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=b9730a4f23a4e8f6a75dc7b6ace47dc5&oe=5BEB9BBD)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 03, 2018, 02:43:51 AM
Saw this in a FB post:

Who says chemistry jokes argon?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 10, 2018, 01:35:03 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/36830434_1403203679779075_5774377220717936640_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=be0c71bcf05deaa5cbe842fc6b5b1002&oe=5BE3B795)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bad Penny II on July 11, 2018, 09:54:01 AM
That's kinda a surprise.
That's a surprise, kinda.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on July 11, 2018, 02:22:07 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/36381372_2017565938316527_6641616308456652800_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=17a32b6b13e57bfd387710defdd9b2c5&oe=5BDEA96E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 07, 2018, 08:31:52 AM
The only thing that flat Earthers fear is sphere itself.

:rimshot:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 07, 2018, 09:49:15 AM
Quote from: Tank on August 07, 2018, 08:31:52 AM
The only thing that flat Earthers fear is sphere itself.

:rimshot:

Oh, dear!

:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on August 07, 2018, 03:56:22 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on July 10, 2018, 01:35:03 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/36830434_1403203679779075_5774377220717936640_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=be0c71bcf05deaa5cbe842fc6b5b1002&oe=5BE3B795)

I've eaten at that restaurant. Fairly decent Tex-Mex.  No little Germans, though.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:29:16 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Ah. They got to the root of the matter and twigged it, eh?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:32:31 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:29:16 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Ah. They got to the root of the matter and twigged it, eh?

Pease leaf now!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:58:18 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:32:31 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:29:16 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Ah. They got to the root of the matter and twigged it, eh?

Pease leaf now!

Aw, I was just thinking of branching out into the subject.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 12, 2018, 08:02:01 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:58:18 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:32:31 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:29:16 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Ah. They got to the root of the matter and twigged it, eh?

Pease leaf now!

Aw, I was just thinking of branching out into the subject.

I think you should stick to what you know.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 12, 2018, 08:27:54 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 08:02:01 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:58:18 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:32:31 PM
Quote from: Dave on August 12, 2018, 07:29:16 PM
Quote from: Tank on August 12, 2018, 07:09:15 PM
Scientists have discovered how trees communicate.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


Ah. They got to the root of the matter and twigged it, eh?

Pease leaf now!

Aw, I was just thinking of branching out into the subject.

I think you should stick to what you know.
Yeah... oh, well, it's time for rest. You wood log me out if I kept it up.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 12, 2018, 10:18:16 PM
All these tree puns. No time forest?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 12, 2018, 10:59:58 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/39006516_10216999562042306_2354543961210617856_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&oh=b3969c566636262cd11e66fdf62b72a9&oe=5BF84319)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bad Penny II on August 13, 2018, 11:02:06 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on August 12, 2018, 10:59:58 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/39006516_10216999562042306_2354543961210617856_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&oh=b3969c566636262cd11e66fdf62b72a9&oe=5BF84319)

of tree
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 13, 2018, 09:22:49 PM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/39099522_1867148830032092_6054361367035510784_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_eui2=AeGZ65A6zRvD8kjZrrBkCSKdbcSNxwOmWOj1Kl7kWp8XcI4Ic1dUE88tmjTCldUzCYr5Wekvl-7-fI6sBQ7s16-b5ciLOr8l8wMcgI0qim3TUg&oh=439c93925392cc7b139b04d0b0cd381d&oe=5BFD8229)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 13, 2018, 09:28:54 PM
^
:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on August 21, 2018, 07:35:45 AM
https://qz.com/1344927/the-case-for-puns-as-the-most-elevated-display-of-wit/?mc_cid=565390f85e&mc_eid=01571cdef9
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 21, 2018, 08:50:17 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on August 21, 2018, 07:35:45 AM
https://qz.com/1344927/the-case-for-puns-as-the-most-elevated-display-of-wit/?mc_cid=565390f85e&mc_eid=01571cdef9

It's good that the Bard had not barred the pun.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on August 21, 2018, 09:53:52 AM
Quote from: Dave on August 21, 2018, 08:50:17 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on August 21, 2018, 07:35:45 AM
https://qz.com/1344927/the-case-for-puns-as-the-most-elevated-display-of-wit/?mc_cid=565390f85e&mc_eid=01571cdef9

It's good that the Bard had not barred the pun.

:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tom62 on August 21, 2018, 07:38:16 PM
Astronaut 1: Hi mate, I can't find any milk for my coffee.

Astronaut 2: In space, no one can. Here, use cream.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 21, 2018, 07:58:10 PM
Quote from: Tom62 on August 21, 2018, 07:38:16 PM
Astronaut 1: Hi mate, I can't find any milk for my coffee.

Astronaut 2: In space, no one can. Here, use cream.

:picard facepalm:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 22, 2018, 05:41:46 AM
Quote from: Tom62 on August 21, 2018, 07:38:16 PM
Astronaut 1: Hi mate, I can't find any milk for my coffee.

Astronaut 2: In space, no one can. Here, use cream.

:picard facepalm:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 22, 2018, 06:02:24 AM
Captain Picard was talking to the Chief Maintenance Techinician about problems regarding a piece of equipment used in modifying and repairing the fabric in the Enterprise, "OK, Chief, do your best to make it sew."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on August 22, 2018, 06:58:05 AM
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 28, 2018, 03:10:13 AM
^ :lol: That's good!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 28, 2018, 09:03:32 AM
(https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40223516_1944877278953752_4644613874828443648_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_eui2=AeHFPZaO-rVaj3XVXpCSyuMW95UA9-ckbP8TXgLDXjD-0jYlf0pj3CGD1hipOqpFx5r-wpuikRc-FQoZedVqsbcUoNvN-ZV-ZcpaTrW9gXX1vQ&oh=c90f816f985307f2b4988a06afd1b0e1&oe=5C01D989)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 29, 2018, 04:08:11 AM
(https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2014-06/17/5/enhanced/webdr08/original-6879-1402998737-11.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on August 29, 2018, 06:08:09 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40427758_1978921622167117_6135929350106644480_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&oh=432903c07b9f76eb0ed85bc3fbe4bcc3&oe=5C374D79)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40263495_1977361708989775_266245576729821184_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=bc24e340d96333a2932dae5293059623&oe=5BED4B89)

(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40248491_10155710802203568_3499373511208599552_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=f907991c3ab722389a6831ba0e95ae1c&oe=5BF4EA72)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on August 29, 2018, 07:12:12 PM
:rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on August 29, 2018, 11:37:40 PM
Ufo caught on tape is .....well, imaginative    :clapping:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 02, 2018, 03:26:10 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40481223_1481322498633859_2617852557699055616_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=03bc779ae2986ba654d6cefa617c6829&oe=5C3A2BB4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 02, 2018, 08:34:09 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/33846813_1478821022221954_3920240899891658752_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=c421c1996ae35cdd5ea1dd316716d4b7&oe=5BFD3548)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 02, 2018, 09:20:21 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 02, 2018, 08:34:09 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/33846813_1478821022221954_3920240899891658752_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=c421c1996ae35cdd5ea1dd316716d4b7&oe=5BFD3548)

Thanks, Silver! My 10" wall clock is just a pair of hands, no numerals 'cos I did not like the ones that came with the mechanism.

Might just print off a variation of that.

Now I remember there used to be an animated "time flies" clock as a windows screen saver
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on September 03, 2018, 03:34:19 AM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 02, 2018, 08:34:09 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/33846813_1478821022221954_3920240899891658752_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=c421c1996ae35cdd5ea1dd316716d4b7&oe=5BFD3548)

Reminds me of Groucho Marx: Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 03, 2018, 09:44:24 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40643622_1888134051251954_725878081801158656_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_eui2=AeFZWAXVu6PRWkifgPO95_C8llFMoOi_BHOnFJ-1_allod8RZhgTkuzrDYLluYPvz8UuRIZfYNY_tZQ9M5umAu3LoarQX17ofJ2icFNpUCIrDQ&oh=e3c1bacde49289c933f42dffc0cb4a00&oe=5BF030E4)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 03, 2018, 10:00:00 AM
The Uxbridge English Dictionary

Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on September 03, 2018, 11:14:13 AM
Quote from: Dave on September 03, 2018, 10:00:00 AM
The Uxbridge English Dictionary



:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 03, 2018, 11:49:14 AM
(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40594040_2205006699532147_8268679636783726592_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&_nc_eui2=AeFxRNbqQE0cXrkikgs7eo5zXurB61vf06G8UjMViWP3zgeBmlJBf_CBx7ugS9w8jtfY8AkJh3jjwLiMP6saE8TEj_DtLQ3ZXl8pPjSJovBRnQ&oh=8110c37bb405e56b5cdae92986f3e1e8&oe=5BF592A5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 05, 2018, 03:45:47 AM
Hmm. :notsure:

Nasty bug: (https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/cf/VW_1302_%282013-09-15_2307_Spu%29.JPG/1200px-VW_1302_%282013-09-15_2307_Spu%29.JPG)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 05, 2018, 12:13:24 PM
That's a damn beautiful bug!!!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: joeactor on September 05, 2018, 08:54:03 PM
Uxbridge and Bug... Ha! (keep 'em coming!)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 06, 2018, 12:21:37 AM
Quote from: Tank on September 05, 2018, 12:13:24 PM
That's a damn beautiful bug!!!

Crush the bug!



Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dark Lightning on September 06, 2018, 02:11:55 AM
Quote from: Tank on September 05, 2018, 12:13:24 PM
That's a damn beautiful bug!!!

Indeed! That is one beautiful specimen. I worked as a mechanic for many years. In general, the less a person spent on a new car, the less care they took of it. It was obvious with beetles, but they were damned near bullet proof, so people got good service out of them. The paint could chalk up something horrible, but they were still ambulatory.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 06, 2018, 07:54:11 AM
And Brazil was the last place to make Bugs so there must be millions of them still about?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 06, 2018, 02:12:33 PM
Quote from: Tank on September 06, 2018, 07:54:11 AM
And Brazil was the last place to make Bugs so there must be millions of them still about?

I wouldn't say there are that many, it's not as common a sight on the street anymore, but they're still there.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 06, 2018, 03:03:22 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 06, 2018, 02:12:33 PM
Quote from: Tank on September 06, 2018, 07:54:11 AM
And Brazil was the last place to make Bugs so there must be millions of them still about?

I wouldn't say there are that many, it's not as common a sight on the street anymore, but they're still there.

Was it Brazil that used alcohol fuelled Bugs as taxis?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 07, 2018, 11:34:45 PM
Quote from: Dave on September 06, 2018, 03:03:22 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on September 06, 2018, 02:12:33 PM
Quote from: Tank on September 06, 2018, 07:54:11 AM
And Brazil was the last place to make Bugs so there must be millions of them still about?

I wouldn't say there are that many, it's not as common a sight on the street anymore, but they're still there.

Was it Brazil that used alcohol fuelled Bugs as taxis?

I don't know, but it's likely.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 18, 2018, 12:16:46 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/41866281_2357054647668347_3270449241775931392_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&oh=7fccef90718f4462bcf4dda28e241de2&oe=5C1CD53F)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on September 18, 2018, 10:11:34 AM
Is that the Excalibur hotel, Argentium?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 19, 2018, 12:43:06 AM
Quote from: No one on September 18, 2018, 10:11:34 AM
Is that the Excalibur hotel, Argentium?

:thumbsup: :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 22, 2018, 02:04:40 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42324442_10217280544834046_5322425444316741632_n.jpg?_nc_cat=106&oh=111001f8f523dd99269ff9fa720b2408&oe=5C1D619B)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 22, 2018, 04:04:34 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42296316_10157586082177316_2997346341736153088_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&oh=a0129101516a6ba9f9112bf588364ad7&oe=5C1C5D19)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 25, 2018, 09:29:26 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42432856_2012074722185140_6778319564095619072_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&oh=d97a60f0e979eacba2d8dbfb85c9b27d&oe=5C5FD3C8)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dave on September 25, 2018, 10:04:58 PM
I'll just wave that one bye-bye.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on September 26, 2018, 10:51:42 AM
It was a bit of a flash in the pan.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 28, 2018, 10:44:54 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42746823_10212290383871271_8417311107525378048_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&_nc_eui2=AeF0oNjg5P_L__Oh996kXxlsVK-RzaPKcwtIiwjjSMpUymzYOn3hVSH1InSJYrPBuTztRCokZGt2akcKSdJCNdin-6HyLsFp1eYH-ViD98pa5w&oh=2e0ba28b0d2e556ee0b0a45f6f078c9f&oe=5C54A16D)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on September 29, 2018, 09:44:06 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42711641_2017502511642361_7264681055104270336_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&_nc_eui2=AeHNwvKJl-OZBGoBGZEe5dyt_sejj_Duc0bzknIAKaPpcW1qJf9Ekuqg2yRpLeQJioCWXljDNRRwkmCzV_pmkueVCqFUasO0WV8vo_8bGmNNxQ&oh=092ae5a6f582a2178c740b1ee6e9b960&oe=5C1A0401)



(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/42784809_2017941201598492_4740809163595055104_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&_nc_eui2=AeFzfLt3q04wiI9MaLx90GSpHWDBjggYVLqvDDdu5E-XpSqA90Q3ZJ_FAH9hA1xEsF8nKnWyrEVxbw2EFOrsFmO8ZGOsArRcVInxnE5H4J6s7Q&oh=1296a3ea034419587de6203120150877&oe=5C22A30C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: No one on September 29, 2018, 10:48:12 PM
I just listened to Justin Bieber, now I have hearing aids.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Dark Lightning on September 30, 2018, 03:59:29 AM
Quote from: No one on September 29, 2018, 10:48:12 PM
I just listened to Justin Bieber, now I have hearing aids.

Why didn't you just pull one of your Uggs over your head?  :P
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Bluenose on November 19, 2018, 01:28:34 AM
I caught this really bad case of the flu in Madrid.

Whilst sniffling and coughing and rolling around in the hotel bed, I realised I needed medical attention, so I called the concierge to get help.

"Oh, so you're sick!" came the reply. "Not a problem. we'll send our very own hotel doctor up to your room right away!"

The doctor strolled into the room within seconds, and whilst I stuttered and tried to comprehend the situation, he gave me some medication to ease the symptoms. When I finally stammered out "h...how does the hotel have their own doctor on call?" He simply shook his head and cracked a smile and replied:

"No one expects the Spanish inn physician."
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on November 19, 2018, 11:53:49 AM
Quote from: Bluenose on November 19, 2018, 01:28:34 AM
"No one expects the Spanish inn physician."

:picard facepalm:  :lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Essie Mae on November 19, 2018, 11:28:29 PM
Consider me punished.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on December 12, 2018, 05:34:51 PM
Tank's been rather punny these days it seems.  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on December 24, 2018, 02:59:26 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/48424257_10218386770767550_6570946890798465024_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=4e49b38379d545004b0104492ee2178f&oe=5CCEFB1C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on December 25, 2018, 05:28:00 AM
^ :snicker:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 11, 2019, 03:33:00 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/49900526_2170037913055486_5402875322846674944_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=c4ee42ad8e5d2c8f867680ef435bc92e&oe=5CC3CD81)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 11, 2019, 03:34:13 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/49896356_540083753161311_4065211387754840064_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=7bbc834c67d6f47e079994c554ca72e8&oe=5CBAFE4E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 11, 2019, 06:26:46 AM
Those are both good :D
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 25, 2019, 03:26:10 PM
(https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/50545087_2494213123928075_7943220892132179968_n.jpg?_nc_cat=106&_nc_ht=scontent-lht6-1.xx&oh=354ae2614b2f50f14cb8d8cf429de76d&oe=5CFD35F5)
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 25, 2019, 05:41:47 PM
^ :rofl:

That's a good one!
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Icarus on January 26, 2019, 01:48:13 AM
Not a pun but maybe useful to Silver and the sister thing......... Do you realize the the words: Dammit I,m mad....can be spelled both forward and backward.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on January 26, 2019, 03:47:17 AM
Is this thread only for puns, or are spoonerisms and malapropisms allowed as well?
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: Tank on January 26, 2019, 08:40:09 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on January 26, 2019, 03:47:17 AM
Is this thread only for puns, or are spoonerisms and malapropisms allowed as well?

Title changed to reflect evolution of the forum zeitgeist to; Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: hermes2015 on January 26, 2019, 01:28:41 PM
Quote from: Tank on January 26, 2019, 08:40:09 AM
Quote from: hermes2015 on January 26, 2019, 03:47:17 AM
Is this thread only for puns, or are spoonerisms and malapropisms allowed as well?

Title changed to reflect evolution of the forum zeitgeist to; Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.

I thank you from the heart of my bottom.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: joeactor on January 26, 2019, 02:22:16 PM
You can't say malapropism without Norm Crosby:

Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Dark Lightning on January 26, 2019, 02:42:54 PM
^  ;D I like him, but my wife can't stand his shtick. She has other redeeming features, though.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: joeactor on January 26, 2019, 03:00:10 PM
Quote from: Dark Lightning on January 26, 2019, 02:42:54 PM
^  ;D I like him, but my wife can't stand his shtick. She has other redeeming features, though.

;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: hermes2015 on January 26, 2019, 03:20:37 PM
:lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns!
Post by: xSilverPhinx on January 26, 2019, 03:21:54 PM
Quote from: Icarus on January 26, 2019, 01:48:13 AM
Not a pun but maybe useful to Silver and the sister thing......... Do you realize the the words: Dammit I,m mad....can be spelled both forward and backward.

That's cool.  ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Dark Lightning on January 27, 2019, 02:06:00 AM
If Tank adds palindromes to the thread title, it's gonna get kind of crowded with words.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Bad Penny II on January 27, 2019, 10:37:06 AM
There's been drought inland, the Murray-Darling river system is suffering, FISH HAVE DIED! :'(
Those evil upstream cotton irrigators have been snavelling all the water.
So there are enquiries going on, I heard a Greens senator on the radio saying the results will be damning.

Hey stop throwing your old vegetables at me! That's funny damn you, damning sounds exactly the same as damming.
Unappreciative bastards, I don't think I'll bother any more.
Some of this stuff is quite edible, this zucchini isn't too flexible.
They're $4 a kg.
More puns?
I'm going to try for an avocado.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on January 27, 2019, 10:41:54 AM
:rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Dark Lightning on January 28, 2019, 12:06:38 AM
Harr! $4/kg!? That kind of price puts it in marital aid territory.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 02, 2019, 02:29:31 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/51608034_398737330876104_8799876789611528192_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=99bef23d6910862108dd7c9e1dbb68eb&oe=5CEA6BF7)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: joeactor on February 02, 2019, 07:25:59 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on February 02, 2019, 02:29:31 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/51608034_398737330876104_8799876789611528192_n.jpg?_nc_cat=100&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=99bef23d6910862108dd7c9e1dbb68eb&oe=5CEA6BF7)

:o :o :o
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Dark Lightning on February 03, 2019, 02:43:04 AM
This place STILL needs a "like" button!  And, ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 16, 2019, 12:24:51 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/51910957_2223533591039251_163813866600398848_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=ebf19026d355a75ea9828b2c3a75972b&oe=5CE66F50)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on March 11, 2019, 08:24:10 AM
(https://imagizer.imageshack.com/img924/4916/ofJZh0.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 21, 2019, 10:17:17 PM
^ That's so awful it's good! :lol:

(https://www.happyatheistforum.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi63.tinypic.com%2F2qa62as.jpg&hash=d47423873aca6510ce7a9f878b85d5010683be57)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Dark Lightning on March 22, 2019, 01:06:00 AM
No matter how kind you think your children are, German children are kinder.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on March 22, 2019, 06:56:24 AM
:rofl:
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: hermes2015 on March 26, 2019, 03:38:38 PM
(https://i.imgur.com/FGzjq8o.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on March 31, 2019, 07:25:51 PM
I don't know if this has already been posted here, but here goes:

Can February march? No, but April may!
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 20, 2019, 02:28:34 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/57272154_371692543686951_308065093470388224_n.jpg?_nc_cat=107&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=348ff19d19dd71c7747bcb31af227372&oe=5D40327E)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 20, 2019, 02:32:36 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/57056235_1246190992211915_8486823843246112768_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=e2d6255b8cd782cb8a0b699a697859f2&oe=5D6FBABB)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 26, 2019, 01:02:39 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/58374487_2392328370832052_3302561801715056640_n.jpg?_nc_cat=101&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=2dfe11b395ae5cdcf559763f20b85e59&oe=5D386222)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on April 26, 2019, 01:20:15 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/58384278_1310925479056004_4365330263446650880_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=8b2ac0c2d68160cb0dc7a9343a9b11f9&oe=5D356A19)

Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on May 09, 2019, 09:43:13 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/59365542_2105902332812720_4454584696084365312_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=2c985101f19c1fb1fb6023dd6e417916&oe=5D2BECF0)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on October 21, 2019, 01:31:40 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa13-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/74607631_2074033056029464_1768408696288706560_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&_nc_oc=AQmkUYKDdG4nP430dd82EKJ-UcjoZ4YnDAIFcNljfEXm2M3xwmThuBxG37MrhCBd34c&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa13-1.fna&oh=768e0d4927483452470c09d199870d94&oe=5E64431C)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Red_Cloud on October 21, 2019, 05:17:57 AM
(https://i.pinimg.com/236x/90/72/93/90729387950ce4ed1da31b94ba6d09bb.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on December 12, 2020, 12:46:30 AM
(https://scontent.fpoa27-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/129585104_208514240808632_7927812569843493230_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&ccb=2&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=CtzdGzXvGugAX-x7yG8&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa27-1.fna&oh=fd5e441ce631fbae682ab134a4a9d160&oe=5FF977A3)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 03, 2021, 11:36:17 PM
(https://scontent.fpoa1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/145861276_10165972291150487_1982040570238076156_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=2&_nc_sid=8bfeb9&_nc_eui2=AeG3Rgbl-h2gXj_HfM5-M52JgdnrLINDM2qB2essg0MzakIvxg8UxJ9rqi25kOFYeDyKGIeRDztURyU9aLXJcvwC&_nc_ohc=TslWACqaOQsAX-2kCXy&_nc_ht=scontent.fpoa1-1.fna&oh=ef6c353fb02739c0c9bb9c9122191d97&oe=6041370D)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on February 04, 2021, 09:37:15 AM
That's bad!
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 04, 2021, 12:09:35 PM
Quote from: Tank on February 04, 2021, 09:37:15 AM
That's bad!

Isn't it? :lol:
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on February 04, 2021, 04:15:56 PM
Quote from: xSilverPhinx on February 04, 2021, 12:09:35 PM
Quote from: Tank on February 04, 2021, 09:37:15 AM
That's bad!

Isn't it? :lol:

It's making the rounds on Facebook now :D
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Icarus on February 05, 2021, 02:45:16 AM
That was not so bad, SIlver.  I laughed out loud. Laughter is damn good therapy. 
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: xSilverPhinx on February 07, 2021, 12:48:24 AM
:grin: :grin: :grin:
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on July 21, 2021, 01:18:10 AM
What made Wales Hungary for Turkey Chile?









They wanted it because it has less Greece.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on August 04, 2021, 03:13:37 PM
Last night my wife asked me to make meat loaf. I told her I would do anything for dinner, but I won't do that...
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on August 16, 2021, 06:24:14 PM
In some circles Bigfoot is often mistaken for Sasquatch...Yeti never complains.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: No one on August 17, 2021, 12:45:18 AM
A cheese factory exploded in France.


Da Brie is everywhere.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on August 17, 2021, 07:39:44 PM
What's the difference between a circus and a brothel?

A circus has a cunning array of stunts...
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Icarus on August 18, 2021, 04:12:28 AM
^ ooooh!   ;D
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on August 19, 2021, 06:12:29 PM
We just bought a pony!!

Her mother's name is Vino Blanca, and the Father's name is Dark Red Wine, so we named the pony "Caberneigh:!
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Ecurb Noselrub on August 23, 2021, 04:04:33 PM
Quote from: Papasito Bruno on August 19, 2021, 06:12:29 PM
We just bought a pony!!

Her mother's name is Vino Blanca, and the Father's name is Dark Red Wine, so we named the pony "Caberneigh:!

If the mother's name was "Mare-Low" you would have a little table wine.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: No one on August 29, 2021, 02:51:33 AM
Cowch for sale.
(https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/2391127/86971423.jpg)
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 07, 2021, 07:53:48 PM
Some sad news, apparently Bruce Willis overdosed on Viagra!

He always said he'd "Die Hard"!
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: No one on September 07, 2021, 07:55:39 PM
I listened to Justin Bieber, now I have hearing aids.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Biggus Dickus on September 17, 2021, 03:46:04 PM
I don't know about anyone else, but I had no idea that Bruce Lee had a brother, I was always under the impression that he was an only child.

Apparently he is a well known Vegan.

His name by the way is Broco Lee.
Title: Re: Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.
Post by: Tank on December 26, 2021, 09:14:39 AM
Schroedinger's cat walks into a bar...

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.