Author Topic: Punishing puns!  (Read 13883 times)

Tank

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Punishing puns!
« on: December 19, 2015, 04:49:35 AM »
Non-puns will be deleted  >:(

« Last Edit: December 27, 2015, 12:32:27 AM by Tank »
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #1 on: December 19, 2015, 12:24:24 PM »
A couple is walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve. They feel a slight precipitation.
“I think it’s raining,” says the man.
“No, it’s snowing,” replies the woman.
“How about we ask this Communist officer here? He is always right!” exclaims the man. “Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?”
“Definitely raining,” Officer Rudolph replies before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile. “See? Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Bluenose

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #2 on: December 19, 2015, 12:49:40 PM »
Three sailors walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would've seen it.
« Last Edit: December 20, 2015, 01:51:12 AM by Bluenose »
"We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"
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+++ Divide by cucumber error: please reinstall universe and reboot.  +++

GNU Terry Pratchett

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2015, 01:13:37 PM »
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Tom62

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #4 on: December 19, 2015, 01:15:17 PM »
Do you need an Ark?
I Noah guy!
The universe never did make sense; I suspect it was built on government contract.
Robert A. Heinlein

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2015, 01:20:08 PM »
My drug dealer really cracks me up.
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Tank

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #6 on: December 19, 2015, 01:21:02 PM »
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #7 on: December 19, 2015, 01:22:49 PM »
Shout out to the ones who don't know the opposite of 'in'!
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #8 on: December 19, 2015, 01:43:26 PM »
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Magdalena

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #9 on: December 19, 2015, 02:07:30 PM »


“I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe.” ~Recusant

"Color me fascinated..." ~Asmodean, The Gray God.

Guardian85

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #10 on: December 19, 2015, 03:58:42 PM »
One for Megan:


"If scientist means 'not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,' I guess I'm a scientist, then."
-Unknown Smartass-

Buddy

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #11 on: December 19, 2015, 08:56:14 PM »
 My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta..
Hell hath no fury like me when I’m slightly inconvenienced and hungry.

I love my car more than I love most people.

Magdalena

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #12 on: December 20, 2015, 12:23:09 AM »


:rimshot:


“I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe.” ~Recusant

"Color me fascinated..." ~Asmodean, The Gray God.

Tank

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #13 on: December 20, 2015, 10:02:18 AM »
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
“Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt.” ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett

Ecurb Noselrub

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Re: Punishing puns!
« Reply #14 on: December 20, 2015, 02:27:14 PM »
My fear of roses is a thorny issue. I'm not sure what it stems from, but it seems likely I'll be stuck with it.