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Punishing puns! and spoonerisms and malapropisms etc.

Started by Tank, December 19, 2015, 11:49:35 AM

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Tank

#45
January 02, 2016, 02:36:31 PM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Tank

#46
January 02, 2016, 03:01:16 PM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Buddy

#47
January 02, 2016, 10:09:49 PM
Leather armor is the best for sneaking because it's literally made of hide.
Strange but not a stranger<br /><br />I love my car more than I love most people.

Guardian85

#48
January 02, 2016, 11:10:40 PM
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married.

Their wedding ceremony was nothing to write home about, but the reception was excellent!


"If scientist means 'not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,' I guess I'm a scientist, then."
-Unknown Smartass-

Tank

#49
January 03, 2016, 12:11:40 PM
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

No one

#50
January 03, 2016, 12:32:35 PM
I don't give edam what anyone says,  that's a gouda one.

Buddy

#51
January 03, 2016, 06:37:10 PM
 I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Strange but not a stranger<br /><br />I love my car more than I love most people.

Guardian85

#52
January 03, 2016, 08:29:33 PM


"If scientist means 'not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,' I guess I'm a scientist, then."
-Unknown Smartass-

Buddy

#53
January 05, 2016, 04:22:26 PM
I decided to join the knitting club. They seem like such a close-knit group.
Strange but not a stranger<br /><br />I love my car more than I love most people.

Biggus Dickus

#54
January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

Davin

#55
January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Always question all authorities because the authority you don't question is the most dangerous... except me, never question me.

Magdalena

#56
January 06, 2016, 03:42:53 AM
Quote from: Bruno de la Pole on January 05, 2016, 04:36:08 PM
I went to a funeral this morning for a friend who died from a viagra-overdose, the family was extremelly distraught because they couldn't close the casket.
Quote from: Davin on January 05, 2016, 04:52:42 PM
It must have been hard on them.
Bruno de la Pole, Davin!
Both of you! Really! >:(
Cut it out!

"I've had several "spiritual" or numinous experiences over the years, but never felt that they were the product of anything but the workings of my own mind in reaction to the universe." ~Recusant

Tank

#57
January 06, 2016, 06:54:37 AM
Well he was obviously a stiff.
If religions were TV channels atheism is turning the TV off.
"Religion is a culture of faith; science is a culture of doubt." ― Richard P. Feynman
'It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.' - Terry Pratchett
Remember, your inability to grasp science is not a valid argument against it.

Guardian85

#58
January 06, 2016, 11:27:49 AM
If you get sick at the airport it could be a terminal illness.


"If scientist means 'not the dumbest motherfucker in the room,' I guess I'm a scientist, then."
-Unknown Smartass-

No one

#59
January 06, 2016, 11:53:57 AM
I listened to Justin Bieber,  now I have hearing aids.
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