The sinner’s guide to the evangelical right

[Tom62]

Did anyone of you read the book "The sinner’s guide to the evangelical right" by Rob Lanman?

I read some excerpts and found it hilarious, like for example (copied from http://www.alternet.org/story/41031/ ):

Homosexuality: God Hates Fags (and Shrimp Scampi)

Since much of the Bible reflects archaic customs (the blood sacrifice of animals is commanded by God in many scriptures, for instance), deciphering which biblical laws Christians should abide by has become the jurisdiction of theologians and televangelists, the latter group being completely unreliable since they're often stoned from their own hairspray fumes. When faced with troubling or inconvenient laws -- like the Bible's promotion of slave owning or its ban on shaving -- most evangelicals say, "That's an irrelevant Old Testament-era commandment," and change the subject to activist judges. Still, when the Bible says God finds an act "detestable" or calls something an "abomination," evangelicals insist it must be avoided at all costs. According to most evangelicals, the big abomination is (no shocker here) homosexuality.

True to form, evangelicals don't pay attention to some of the other things the Bible designates as being abominable. Most glaringly, Leviticus 11:9-12 says eating shrimp is an abomination:

9. ...whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat. 10. And all that have not fins and scales in the seas...they shall be an abomination unto you: 11. They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.

Forget picketing abortion clinics. Head over to Popeye's and Red Lobster! The devil is in the scampi. Evangelicals should be organizing boycotts against Long John Silver's if they want to be consistent. Evidently every person in Maine is going to hell too. Last time we looked, lobsters don't have any fins or scales either....


How to Argue with Ultraconservative Fundamentalists

On Gay Marriage:

Fundamentalists say: What's next? Are you gonna let them have sex with cocker spaniels? God calls it an abomination.

Sinners say: Why do evangelicals always use cocker spaniels as an example? Cocker spaniels are straight. Greyhounds, on the other hand. Now they're into that gay shit. Despite evangelicals' rhetoric about the institution of marriage being placed under attack by the liberals and the gays, the real assault is coming from within their own ranks. According to Barna Research, Born Again Christians have a higher divorce rate than any other social group in the United States


Intelligent Design

Fundamentalists say: Humans are too complex to not have a Creator.

Sinners say: Who created God? He's complex too, right? Does God have an Intelligent Designer as well? Plus, there are many unintelligent imperfections in nature, such as the human eye, whose inside-out retina causes a blind spot in our field of vision. And come on, would an Intelligent Designer really create Matchbox 20, Vin Diesel, or men with nipples? If you want to teach Intelligent Design, save it for philosophy class. It's not science.


Michael Moore:

Fundamentalists say: He's annoying.

Sinners say: He's annoying.

[joeactor]

Michael Moore:
Fundamentalists say: He's annoying.
Sinners say: He's annoying.

Well... at least we can all agree on something!

Sounds like a book I should put on my winter reading list.

Thanks,
  JoeActor

[JNTB]

Despite evangelicals' rhetoric about the institution of marriage being placed under attack by the liberals and the gays, the real assault is coming from within their own ranks. According to Barna Research, Born Again Christians have a higher divorce rate than any other social group in the United States

Maybe they get into too many arguments about who is more righteous before God?

[rubbersoul]

well said, one of my personal favorite things about the religous is despite being so holy and upright they have so many statistics stacked against them in very large ways.

also 83% of people in american prisons identify themselves as christian, 1% as atheists

[rubbersoul]

well said, one of my personal favorite things about the religous is despite being so holy and upright they have so many statistics stacked against them in very large ways.

also 83% of people in american prisons identify themselves as christian, 1% as atheists

[McQ]

Yeah. You can say that again! ;-)

[Big Mac]

DOUBLE DOUBLE POST!!!!!

[BGMA]

Have you found www.skepticsannotatedbible.com yet?  That's a great one, too.  For those of you who duel with biblical literalists, it has a ton of info.